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This  Copy    is 


AN   AMERICAN 
ABELARD   AND   HELOISE 


UNTV.  CMP  CALIF.  LIBRARY.  LOS  ANGELES 


AN   AMERICAN 

slbelard  &  Heloise 


A  LOVE  STORY 


By 
MARY  IVES  TODD 

"  //  some  new  element  is  not  introduced  into 
America,  the  life  of  the  Republic  will  soon 
terminate."  HERBERT  SPENCER 


THE    GRAFTON    PRESS 
New  York 


Copyright,  1904,  by  THE  GRAKTON  PKKSS 


A  FFECTIONATELY  inscribed  to  all  who 
•*  ^-  believe  that  justice  is  a  higher  virtue  than 
charity,  and  that  the  tendency  of  one  is  to  elevate 
mankind  and  of  the  other  to  degrade  it. 


2133246 


TABLE  of  CONTENTS 


I  The  Pastor  and  His  Flock  .        II 
II  Love  and  Death          ...        27 

III  The  Bachelor's  Apartment  .        39 

IV  The  Marriage  of  Adam  and  Eve  .        49 
V  The  Heroism  of  Reason     .  .        65 

VI  In  Andromeda  .          .  .81 

VII  The  Song  of  the   West        .  .        93 

VIII  "Home,  Sweet  Home"       .  .      107 

IX  A  Struggle  with  Love         .  .      117 

X  Mary  and  Martha  .  133 

XI   The  Mystery  of  Pain          .  .      145 

XII  The  Big  Envelope  .  .      161 

XIII  The  Angel  in  the  Wilderness  .      173 

XIV  Republican  Royalties            .  .      191 
XV  In  Paradise                 .           .  .      205 

XVI  A  New  England  Boulder  .      22$ 

XVII  A  Pillar  of  the  Church      .  .      237 

XVIII  A   Cure  for  the  Blues  .      251 

XIX  On  to  the  Land  of  Heart's  Desire  .      261 

XX  The  Lovers'  Meeting  .  -273 

XXI  A  Goddess  of  Liberty          .  .      287 

XXII  Abelard's  Appeal        .          .  .      301 

XXIII  The  Storm         .  .          .  .313 

XXIV  The  Last  Struggle     .          .  .331 


CHAPTER  I 

THE  PASTOR  AND  HIS  FLOCK 


"THERE  is  another  self  to  every  life, 
For  all  things  must  be  dual  to  be  one." 

Luscombe  Searelle. 

CIVILIZATION  must  keep  pace  with  the  advance  of 
woman. —  M.  /.  T. 


s^^ 


The  Pastor  and  His  Flock 

* 

is  difficult  to  describe  the  Rev.  Abel 
Allen,  of  Boston,  adored  by  the  women 
of  his  flock  and  held  in  high  esteem  by 
'the  men.  It  is  difficult  to  bring  his 
personality  clearly  before  the  reader,  for  he 
looked  quite  differently  at  different  times  and  on 
different  occasions.  It  is  easy,  however,  to  give 
a  fair  impression  of  his  normal  working  as- 
pect, as  he  paces  up  and  down  his  study  or 
seats  himself  to  jot  down  the  result  of  his  re- 
flections. He  is  tall  and  a  man  of  fine  pres- 
ence, notwithstanding  a  very  perceptible  stoop 
in  his  shoulders,  pale  and  somewhat  sunken 
cheeks  and  an  air  of  melancholy.  Though  he 
has  but  lately  passed  his  thirtieth  birthday,  his 
black  hair  has  already  a  sprinkling  of  gray  in 
its  heavy  folds,  while  his  brown  eyes  are  a  little 
sunken  in  their  sockets  and  wholly  without  fire 
in  their  glance. 

Seeing  him  thus,  one  could  scarcely  believe 
that  this  serious  man  had  been  madly  in  love 
in  the  past  with  a  girl  quite  unworthy  of  him; 
while  as  for  the  present  or  for  the  future, — 
well,  let  it  suffice  to  say  here  that  not  a  woman 


12  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

of  his  congregation  but  would  have  been  ready 
to  swear  that  her  minister  was  as  immune,  in 
respect  to  what  certain  religious  writers  have 
termed  carnal  love,  as  an  aged  Roman  Catholic 
priest. 

One  word  concerning  this  episode  of  the  past, 
since  it  was  still  bearing  fruit.  It  happened 
when  Abel  was  assiduously  encouraging  the 
growth  of  a  delicate  but  picturesque  mustache, 
and  entertaining  hopes  that  he  might  one  day 
be  President  of  the  United  States,  as  the  time 
for  him  to  deposit  his  first  vote  was  near.  The 
bit  of  pink  femininity,  who  made  all  sorts  of 
eyes  with  a  facility  which  soon  captured  Abel's 
heart,  was  not  in  the  least  in  love  with  her  victim. 
Indeed,  no  sooner  had  she  reduced  the  young 
tyro  to  a  state  of  adoring  imbecility  than  she  up 
and  married  a  "saner  man."  At  least  that  is 
the  way  Abel  excused  the  pretty,  capricious 
creature  to  whom  he  played  the  part  of  devoted 
slave  until  she  tired  of  the  sport  —  until  she 
brought  the  man  she  really  loved  to  her  feet. 

Betrayed,  wounded  nigh  unto  death,  des- 
perate and  overwhelmed  with  black  despair, 
Abel  drifted  one  evening  into  a  revival  meeting. 
The  preacher  was  telling  the  people  of  God's 
love  for  lost  souls,  how  He  had  sent  His  only 
begotten  Son  into  the  world  to  save  those  who 
knew  not  which  way  to  turn.  Ah,  that  meant 
him;  for  was  he  not  bewildered,  distracted, 


THE    PASTOR    AND    HIS    FLOCK  13 

ready  to  blow  his  brains  out  if  some  measure  of 
relief  did  not  come  quickly  to  save  him  ?  It 
was  only  necessary  for  the  preacher  to  finish 
his  appeal  by  repeating  the  enticing  words  of 
Christ,  "  Come  unto  Me,  all  ye  that  labour  and 
are  heavy  laden,  and  I  will  give  you  rest" — 
Abel  went  forward  among  the  "  mourners,"  and 
flung  himself  on  his  knees. 

This  act  produced  a  great  sensation.  A 
week  before  he  had  been  present  with  "his 
girl,"  and  they  had  poked  fun  the  entire  evening 
at  what  they  considered  the  imbecility  of  the 
proceedings.  Now  he  was  the  humblest  of 
the  humble,  the  sincerest  of  the  sincere,  the 
most  importunate  of  those  who  pleaded  for  sal- 
vation. Certainly  he  believed  in  a  hell,  he  was 
already  suffering  its  torments.  Perhaps  some- 
where there  was  a  Saviour  and  a  heaven. 

Being  of  an  extremely  conscientious  and  grate- 
ful disposition,  Abel  had  no  sooner  experienced 
the  joy  attendant  upon  self-renunciation  and 
spiritual  communion  with  a  Higher  Spirit, 
and  felt  himself  "  saved  in  Christ,"  than  he  de- 
termined to  devote  his  life  to  the  saving  of  other 
lost  souls. 

In  this  work  he  had  been  singularly  success- 
ful, and  scores  had  been  gathered  into  the 
fold  of  the  gentle  Shepherd  under  the  persuasive 
influence  of  his  magnetic  glance  and  eloquent 
tongue.  Everywhere  he  went  women,  espe- 


14  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

cially,  were  his  eager  followers  and  devoted 
assistants.  The  fact  that  he  belonged  to  the 
opposite  sex  seemed  never  to  present  itself  to 
their  minds,  any  more  than  it  did  to  the  women 
who  followed  Christ  about. 

Of  course,  it  could  not  be  affirmed  that  he 
regarded  each  member  of  his  flock  with  pre- 
cisely the  same  emotion,  but  it  could  be  said 
with  truth  that  he  loved  them  according  to  their 
necessities;  those  who  were  in  the  sorest  need 
received  the  most  attention  and  sympathy  and 
were  oftenest  in  his  prayers,  and  when  Provi- 
dence had  relieved  them,  new  distressed  ones 
would  take  their  places  in  his  heart. 

And  now  this  minister,  who  for  a  decade  had 
been  overflowing  with  the  love  of  Christ  and 
His  followers,  and  filled  only  with  zeal  for  lost 
souls,  had  been  seized  with  a  love  as  potent  as 
it  was  personal,  as  absorbing  as  it  was  unex- 
pected. What  effect  was  this  new  love  to  have 
on  his  life  ?  The  first,  mad  and  mistaken  as  it 
had  seemed,  had  yet  been  the  means  of  bringing 
him  to  the  foot  of  the  Cross.  Whither  would 
this  new  love  carry  him  ? 

After  their  first  meeting,  at  the  bedside  of  her 
father,  who  was  very  ill,  Abel  could  not  recall 
whether  Heloise  Mills  was  blonde  or  brunette, 
tall  or  short,  thick  or  thin.  He  was  only  con- 
scious of  feeling  a  little  disappointed  that  she 
had  been  so  chary  of  her  glances  and  her  speech, 


THE    PASTOR   AND    HIS    FLOCK  15 

for  they  both  had  had  the  effect  upon  him  of 
fine  music.  It  did  not  occur  to  him,  either 
then  or  afterwards,  that  there  was  danger  ahead 
in  an  occasional  meeting  with  her  in  the  room 
of  the  sick  man.  And  if  anyone  had  told  this 
sweet,  innocent  minister  of  the  Gospel  that  the 
forces  which  make  for  love  and  marriage  were 
expanding  day  by  day  in  his  soul  he  would  have 
been  shocked.  But  he  found  out  this  fact  in  due 
time,  and  under  circumstances  which  gave  an 
excellent  opportunity  to  a  multitude  of  people 
to  forecast  the  future,  had  their  eyes  been  sharp 
enough. 

Abel  had  delivered  his  usual  evening  sermon 
to  an  unusually  large  congregation,  for  his 
people  had  just  finished  a  new  and  commodious 
building  and  many  friends  and  strangers  had 
come  from  round  about  to  attend  the  dedi- 
catory service  held  that  day.  His  text  was 
the  one  which  had  led  to  his  own  conversion: 
"Come  unto  Me."  It  was  a  beautiful  sermon, 
full  of  poetic  imagery  and  uplifting  inspira- 
tion, and  gave  many  of  his  hearers  glimpses  of 
heaven.  He  announced  the  hymn,  and  when  the 
congregation  began  to  sing  he  seated  himself, 
somewhat  fatigued  by  the  trying  ordeals  of  the 
day. 

As  he  glanced  slowly  and  somewhat  sadly 
over  the  congregation,  for  every  large  gathering 
contains  many  hearts  which  are  sick,  worn,  and 


l6  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

weary,  and  Abel  instinctively  sought  these,  his 
eyes  suddenly  looked  full  into  those  of  Heloise 
Mills,  seated  near  the  front,  and  there  his  glance 
remained,  arrested,  fastened,  interlocked  with 
hers,  for  how  long  Abel  could  never  tell.  And 
what  took  place  while  these  two  were  gazing 
into  each  other's  eyes  ?  Abel  always  expressed 
himself  as  convinced  that  God,  during  those 
moments  of  sacred  sweetness,  was  uniting  the 
soul  of  Heloise  with  his  own  in  an  unbreakable 
bond  of  affection,  and  Heloise  was  equally  un- 
scientific. She  said  it  seemed  to  her  that  some 
mysterious  hand  during  that  period  of  new-born 
delicious  happiness  was  knitting  their  two 
selves  inextricably  together,  that  she  "should 
never  again  know  what  it  was  to  be  lonely." 

Heloise  was  the  first  to  awaken  from  the 
trance  of  bliss.  She  glanced  timidly  around  to 
see  if  others  had  observed  them,  but  no  one 
appeared  to  be  aware  that  anything  unusual 
had  been  taking  place.  Everyone,  so  far  as  she 
could  discover  by  so  hasty  a  glance,  seemed  to  be 
singing  with  more  or  less  heartiness,  and  if  any- 
one had  observed  the  minister's  air  of  absorp- 
tion, of  aloofness  from  the  religious  exercises 
going  forward,  they  had  doubtless  attributed 
it  to  secret  communication  with  the  indwelling 
Christ  of  his  soul. 

Much  relieved,  Heloise  glanced  down  at  the 
hymn-book  she  was  sharing  with  another,  and 


THE    PASTOR    AND    HIS    FLOCK  I"] 

began  to  sing.  Alas,  every  tone  she  uttered 
was  a  cry  of  joy!  She  stopped  short.  It 
would  never  have  done  for  her  to  go  on,  for  the 
words  were  sad,  and  the  tune  melancholy,  even 
doleful.  The  verses  told  of  a  world  lost  in  sin,  of 
a  Christ  who  sacrified  himself  to  save  mankind, 
of  the  few  who  chose  the  narrow  path  leading 
to  salvation  and  of  the  many  who  rejected  it, 
bent  on  pursuing  the  broad  way  which  leads  to 
everlasting  condemnation.  And  the  last  verse 
dismally  urged  sinners  to  repent  or  be  lost  for- 
ever. 

The  hymn  finished,  a  moment  of  silence  was 
followed  by  the  benediction.  Almost  imme- 
diately afterwards  a  general  rustle  indicated  the 
dispersion  of  the  congregation.  Quite  a  group 
of  people  found  their  way  to  the  front  in  the 
hope  of  having  a  handshake  and  a  few  words 
or  a  loving  glance  from  the  pastor  so  greatly 
beloved  by  his  flock. 

The  tenderness  and  the  sympathy  which  were 
always  present  in  Abel's  intercourse  with  his 
people,  or  indeed  with  any  one  who  sought  his 
attention  or  aid,  was  usually  tinged  with  melan- 
choly. But  to-night  he  seemed  a  new  being. 
His  fine  dark  eyes  fairly  shone  with  happiness, 
and  though  none  could  recall  that  he  had  ever 
laughed  outright,  his  rare  smile  was  now  so 
ready,  so  bright,  so  full  of  joy  as  to  cause  re- 
mark. 


l8  ABELARD   AND    HELOISE 

Widow  Smith  was  not  sure  she  liked  the  change. 
She  was  a  woman  who  nursed  her  disappoint- 
ments with  scrupulous  care.  Having  arrived 
at  middle  age,  she  had  a  large  stock  of  them  on 
hand,  and  went  about  with  a  countenance 
pinched  and  lined  by  worry  and  unhappiness. 
Her  marriage  she  never  regarded  as  other  than 
a  failure,  yet  when  the  great  anarchist,  Death, 
suddenly  removed  her  husband  and  set  her  free 
from  the  hated  bonds,  her  pose  as  a  stricken 
widow  was  no  less  mournful  than  had  been  her 
former  role  of  neglected  wife.  Indeed  she  came 
oftener  to  her  pastor's  study  to  be  prayed  and 
condoled  with  after  her  husband's  death  than 
before  that  event  took  place.  She  looked  upon 
Abel  as  a  man  of  sorrows,  and  was  accordingly 
not  pleased  with  the  new  air  of  lightheartedness 
he  exhibited  as  he  shook  her  hand;  and  even 
less  pleased  with  his  words : 

"Ah,  my  dear  Mrs.  Smith,  we  are  going  to 
make  a  new  start,  are  we  not  ?  Going  to  rub 
everything  off  our  old  slates,  and  play  it  was  all 
a  mistake  ?  Eh  ?" 

"I  don't  understand  you,"  she  said  severely, 
removing  her  hand,  and  pressing  her  lips 
tightly  together. 

"Don't  understand  me?  Don't  you  know 
that  you  and  I  are  very  great  sinners  —  that 
we  choose  darkness  rather  than  light,  sorrow 
rather  than  joy  for  our  minds  to  gloat  upon  ? " 


THE    PASTOR   AND    HIS    FLOCK  ig 

As  Mrs.  Smith  refused  to  unclose  her  lips  and 
turned  away  in  an  uncompromising  attitude, 
Abel  gave  his  attention  to  a  widow  of  an  alto- 
gether different  type.  Though  tired-looking, 
pale,  even  blanched  —  as  befitted  a  washer- 
woman —  yet  she  was  happy  as  the  day  was 
long.  With  her  were  three  children,  who 
seemed  greatly  pleased  to  see  their  pastor,  with 
the  exception  of  Teddy,  the  youngest.  Mrs. 
Merrill  said  eagerly: 

"I've  brought  the  children  to  thank  you  for 
them  presents  you  was  so  good  as  to  tek  'em." 

Here  she  looked  with  some  anxiety  at  the 
eldest,  a  girl  of  seven,  clad  in  a  gingham  gown 
noticeable  only  on  account  of  the  beautiful  man- 
ner in  which  it  had  been  laundered.  The  little 
girl  responded  to  her  mother's  look  by  repeating 
with  care,  while  blushing  a  rosy  red,  "  I  am  very 
much  obleeged  to  you,  sir." 

The  mother  now  glanced  at  her  second  daugh- 
ter, who  took  up  her  cue  as  readily  and  seriously 
as  the  first:  "I  am  very  much  obleeged  to  you, 
sir." 

It  was  now  Teddy's  turn  to  give  thanks  for 
benefits  received,  but  the  mother  had  apparently 
experienced  some  drawback  in  coaching  him 
for  this  occasion;  for  she  bent  down  and  said 
coaxingly,  as  she  stroked  his  flaxen  hair,  "Now, 
Teddy  dear,  tell  the  minister  as  to  how  you  are 
obleeged  to  him  for  the  whistle  he  was  so  good  as 


2O  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

to  tek  you.  Please  say,  'I  am  very  much 
obleeged  to  you,  sir/  —  there's  a  dear!" 

But  Teddy  was  not  to  be  so  easily  bribed. 
He  shook  his  head  and  said  stoutly,  "  I'ze  won't. 
It's  boke!" 

"So  you  won't  thank  me,  eh?  You  don't 
need  to!  I  can  get  my  thanks  out  of  you  easy 
enough ! " 

Abel  grabbed  the  youngster  off"  of  his  feet, 
tossed  him  into  the  air  and  catching  him  as  he 
descended  planted  a  kiss  upon  his  pouting  lips. 

"There,  we're  square!"  he  exclaimed,  as  he 
turned  the  rebel  over  to  his  mother.  "You  shall 
have  a  new  whistle,  Master  Teddy,  if  your  mother 
tells  me  you  are  good." 

The  next  in  the  group  about  Abel  was  a  fine 
specimen  of  ripe  old  age,  the  Rev.  John  Brooks, 
a  retired  minister  who  had  not  preached,  except 
as  the  spirit  moved  him,  for  more  than  a  decade. 
Since  the  wife  of  his  bosom  had  passed  on  to 
a  higher  sphere  many  years  ago  he  had  made 
the  best  of  his  loss;  he  felt,  in  fact,  that  God 
was  taking  as  good  care  of  her  as  he  had  been 
able  to  do,  if  not  a  little  better.  Certainly,  no 
one  enjoyed  every  hour  of  the  day  more  than 
this  hale  and  hearty  old  preacher,  free  from 
pecuniary  embarrassment  and  surrounded  by 
friends  who  delighted  to  do  him  honor. 

O 

He  grasped  Abel's  hand  with  immense  hearti- 
.   ness,  saying  as  he  shook  it: 


THE    PASTOR    AND    HIS    FLOCK  21 

"You  are  always  astonishing  me  with  your 
eloquent  and  sympathetic  treatment  of  Biblical 
truth;  the  effect  on  me  is  magical.  I  want  to 
start  right  off  and  work  miracles,  like  the  dis- 
ciples of  the  time  of  Christ!  You  should  go 
far,  my  son,  very  far.  Heaven  has  dowered 
you  with  a  warm  heart  and  a  tongue  of  flame. 
But  be  a  little  less  prodigal  of  them  —  that  is 
the  advice  of  a  hale  old  man  whose  watchword 
has  ever  been  'Moderation." 

"Thank  you  —  thank  you!"  said  Abel,  with 
that  air  of  cheerful  deference  which  a  devoted 
son  accords  to  a  beloved  parent,  in  spite  of  the 
fact  that  his  own  ideal,  the  one  he  had  chosen 
when  converted  and  which  he  had  always  been 
faithful  to,  was  the  opposite,  Christ  and  Him 
crucified. 

Two  young  ladies,  inseparable  companions 
and  devoted  to  church  work,  now  offered  Abel 
their  neatly  gloved  hands.  It  was  beginning 
to  be  whispered  about  that  they  were  more  de- 
voted to  their  handsome  young  pastor  than  was 
really  necessary,  but  as  nearly  all  the  women 
of  Abel's  congregation  were  his  ardent  followers, 
it  was  unbecoming  to  single  out  any  special 
members  for  envious  comment. 

The  young  ladies  gave  place,  after  a  few 
words  had  been  exchanged,  to  a  group  of  young 
people  who  lived  in  a  suburb.  They  were  a 
merry  party,  who  were  ail  supposed  to  be  "en- 


22  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

gaged";  a  situation  eminently  interesting  to 
Abel  after  that  look  into  the  eyes  of  Heloise 
Mills,  and  he  entered  with  zest  into  their  con- 
versation, which  did  not  last  long,  however,  for 
there  was  still  a  goodly  sized  group  waiting 
more  or  less  patiently  for  a  little  personal  atten- 
tion. People  may  sing  very  zealously,  "Oh, 
to  be  nothing,"  but  few  learn  to  put  the  doctrine 
into  practice. 

After  the  trio  of  engaged  couples  were  well  out 
of  the  church,  Herbert  Churchill,  one  of  the 
number,  lost  no  time  in  remarking: 

"That  preacher  of  yours,  Minnie,  ought  to 
be  well  kicked." 

Herbert  was  an  odd  mixture  of  sweetness  and 
aggressiveness.  His  eyes  were  soft  brown  and 
his  mouth  also  indicated  good  nature  and  a  good 
heart.  On  the  other  hand  his  forehead  showed 
him  to  be  of  a  scientific  turn  of  mind,  while 
his  nose  was  aggressively  high  and  curved  and 
went  well  with  his  square  chin. 

"How  horrid  of  you!  What  do  you  mean  ?" 
asked  his  fiancee,  in  a  vexed  tone  of  voice. 

"I  mean  that  a  man  who  prostitutes  such 
rare  gifts  to  keep  alive  a  religion  built  on 
crude  metaphysical  fancies,  instead  of  on  the 
solid  rock  of  science,  ought  to  be  severely  dealt 
with." 

"  In  the  name  of  miracles  and  sweet  romance, 
who  wants  any  science  in  their  religion  or  their 


THE    PASTOR   AND    HIS    FLOCK  23 

love?"  inquired  a  young  man  of  the  group 
who  had  been  listening. 

"People  ought  to  want  it!"  retorted  Herbert, 
"when  they  think  of  the  wonderful  universe 
that  science  has  revealed  to  mankind,  in  place 
of  the  vague  and  solitary  realm  presided  over 
by  a  vindictive  Jehovah  and  the  subtle  beast 
called  Satan." 

Two  of  the  girls  did  not  join  in  the  laugh 
which  followed  this  speech. 

This  nettled  Herbert,  who  went  on  recklessly: 

"The  truth  is  that  women  —  who  might  well 
be  called  the  religious  sex  —  won't  have  any- 
thing to  do  with  a  religion  which  has  no  Satan 
in  it.  They  all  secretly  like  Satan.  It  is  an 
inherited  instinct!" 

Here  Mary  Somers,  who  prided  herself  on 
her  scientific  attainments,  bluntly  replied: 

"Do  you  mean  that  Eve  plucked  the  apple 
because  she  was  secretly  in  love  with  Satan  ?" 

"Exactly!" 

"Why  should  you  say  that,  when  the  Bible 
expressly  says  she  took  of  the  fruit  of  the  for- 
bidden tree  because  she  saw  it  was  good  for 
food,  pleasant  to  the  eye  and  to  be  desired  to 
make  one  wise.  That  ought  to  convince  you 
of  the  fact  that  our  mother  Eve  was  of  a  scien- 
tific turn  of  mind.  She  pursued  precisely  the 
same  course  as  her  scientific  sons  of  to-day." 

"  But  her  sons  of  a  scientific  turn  refuse  to  be 


24  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

suppressed  —  and  they  ought  to  be  encouraged," 
responded  Herbert  with  a  smile.  "Now,  here 
am  I,  a  poor  devil,  who  has  written  a  scientific 
book  on  love,  and  can't  get  a  publisher  to  bring 
it  out.  Really,  you  girls  should  imitate  the 
example  of  Queen  Isabella  —  pawn  or  sell  your 
jewels  and  give  me  the  money,  that  I  may  en- 
lighten the  world  discovered  by  Columbus." 

"  How  did  you  write  it,  in  the  form  of  a  novel  ?" 
asked  Minnie. 

"No,  I  should  hope  not!  I  tried  to  imitate 
Herbert  Spencer  in  the  exactness  and  solidity 
with  which  I  - 

"  If  you  are  wise,  you  will  rewrite  it,  cast  it 
in  the  form  of  fiction  and  dilute  it  a  thousand 
fold!"  struck  in  Minnie. 

"  Make  a  thousand  novels  out  of  it  ?  —  oh, 
Lord!"  groaned  another  young  man. 

After  a  general  laugh  which  had  been  called 
forth  had  subsided,  Mary  Somers  said  in  a  tone 
of  warning:  "If  you  do  succeed  in  finding  a  pub- 
lisher, that  will  not  mean  sales,  nor  readers. 
Of  Herbert  Spencer's  first  work  I  believe  but 
seven  hundred  and  fifty  copies  were  made  and  it 
took  fourteen  years  to  sell  them,  and  nearly  a 
third  of  the  original  subscribers  to  the  Syn- 
thetic Philosophy  forgot  to  pay  for  their  parts." 

Mary's  remarks  were  followed  by  an  ominous 
silence.  After  which  the  conversation  degen- 
erated into  love  talk  of  the  usual  babble  variety. 


CHAPTER  II 
LOVE  AND  DEATH 


"THE  abyss  which  parts  those  of  different  religious 
beliefs  was  yawning  between  them."  —  Zola. 


II 


Love  and  Death 


EARLY  the  next  morning  Abel  received  a 
note  from  Mr.  Mills  begging  him  to  be  so 
good  as  to  come  to  him  as  soon  as  possible. 
Abel  made  haste  to  comply  with  the  sick  man's 
request,  as  the  messenger  said  he  was  much 
worse.  Immediately  upon  the  minister's  arrival, 
Mr.  Mills  greeted  him  with  these  words: 

"It  is  not  to  speak  of  physical  ills  that  I 
desire  your  presence.  They  are  of  small  im- 
portance in  comparison  with  the  immortal 
spirit,  which  lives  forever  in  a  state  of  either 
bliss  or  torment."  The  sick  man  sighed 
deeply  and  seemed  unable  to  continue. 

Abel  laid  his  hand  sympathetically  on  the 
thin  hands  clasped  together  on  the  coverlid,  and 
said  gently:  "You  seem  poorly  to-day.  Let  us 
not  talk  of  anything  which  makes  you  sad. 
Pray  wait  until  you  are  stronger." 

"  My  mind  is  made  up  to  speak  to  you  without 
further  loss  of  time,  and  I  must  proceed."  Mr. 
Mills'  tone  was  so  firm  that  Abel  made  no  fur- 
ther opposition,  seeing  that  it  would  be  useless. 

"Yes  —  there  is  a  new  revolt  in  my  family  to 
be  dealt  with,"  began  the  sick  man  in  tense  de- 


28  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

spair.  "The  first  one  I  put  down  with  a  strong 
hand  —  I  was  not  then  ill,  as  you  see  me  to-day. 
It  had  to  do  with  my  wife,  who  secretly  plucked 
fruit  from  the  forbidden  tree  of  knowledge,  like 
Eve  before  her."  He  released  one  of  his  hands 
from  the  minister's  palm  and  wiped  the  cold 
sweat  from  his  brow. 

"Let  me  bring  you  a  glass  of  water,"  said 
Abel,  rising. 

Mr.  Mills,  having  drunk  a  portion  of  the 
liquid,  continued  his  narration,  though  with 
visible  pain  and  difficulty. 

"The  first  mutiny  in  my  family  happened  in 
this  wise:  We  were  about  to  settle  in  a  strange 
city,  after  having  passed  some  years  in  traveling 
from  place  to  place,  as  my  business  had  re- 
quired constant  change  of  location.  My  desire 
for  a  settled  abode  was  partly  on  account  of  my 
children,  who  had  never  gone  to  school.  While 
traveling  about,  it  had  been  impossible  to  put 
them  in  school  without  being  separated  from 
them.  Hitherto,  they  had  been  taught  by  my 
wife,  who  was  a  good  scholar  and  of  a  literary 
turn.  Then,  too,  my  wife  enjoyed  being  their 
teacher.  As  she  had  no  house  to  keep  and  no 
society  nor  church  work  to  engage  her  attention, 
she  divided  her  time  between  her  children  and 
such  reading  matter  as  she  could  procure. 
Helen  —  my  wife  —  was  an  omnivorous  reader, 
and  could  apparently  discover  the  contents  of  a 


LOVE    AND    DEATH  2Q 

book  by  a  mere  running  glance  through  it. 
Having  been  on  the  wing  for  several  years,  I 
had  not  renewed  our  church  relations  from  time 
to  time,  at  the  various  places  in  which  we  found 
ourselves  for  longer  or  shorter  periods,  for  the 
reason  that  I  was  perfectly  satisfied  with  our 
old  church  home  and  place,  and  was  always 
hoping  to  be  able  to  return.  But  the  years  sped 
by,  and  I  felt  that  it  was  but  right  to  give  our 
children  such  advantages  as  were  to  be  procured 
in  a  city  of  goodly  size  and  in  a  well-settled  part 
of  the  country. 

"  Having  chosen  the  locality,  my  next  duty  was 
to  choose  the  church.  I  exercised  great  care  in 
the  selection  of  a  preacher;  for  in  these  days  of 
half-belief  that  is  a  matter  of  infinite  importance. 
I  decided  upon  a  church  having  for  its  leader  a 
man  whose  record  was  most  assuring.  During 
all  the  years  of  his  ministrations  he  had  never 
once  been  known  to  give  his  congregation  any 
heretical  surprises.  His  sermons  on  the  Bible 
as  the  Word  of  God,  on  the  Fall  of  Man,  The 
Incarnation,  the  Atonement,  Justification  by 
Faith,  and  similar  subjects,  were  always  per- 
fectly sound.  You  can  guess  the  holy  joy  I  felt 
in  finding  a  preacher  so  entirely  to  my  mind,  in 
these  degenerate  days.  I  expected  my  wife  to 
share  my  delight,  for  she  knew  how  particular 
I  was  in  this  respect,  but  on  the  contrary,  when 
I  told  her  of  my  success  and  how  I  had  already 


3O  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

given  our  names,  she  simply  remarked  that  she 
was  very  sorry  I  had  not  first  consulted  with  her 
about  our  new  church  relations,  as  it  would  have 
saved  us  all  not  a  little  annoyance.  She  then 
.proceeded  to  give  me  the  astounding  informa- 
tion that  she  herself  was  no  longer  an  orthodox 
believer,  and  therefore  could  not  join  with  me 
another  orthodox  church.  I  was  struck  dumb. 
My  tongue  refused  to  move!" 

Mr.  Mills'  anguish  became  so  great  that  Abel 
handed  him  a  strengthening  cordial  from  a 
stand  near  the  bed,  and  again  begged  him  to 
wait  until  another  day  before  proceeding  with 
such  harrowing  reflections.  For  answer  the 
sick  man  shook  his  head  and  continued  his  nar- 
rative as  soon  as  he  had  rested  a  little. 

"All  I  could  do  was  to  gaze  helplessly  at  my 
lost  wife  —  my  dear  Helen!  When  she  realized 
that  I  was  speechless  from  grief  and  not  from 
anger,  she  threw  her  arms  around  my  neck, 
kissed  me  repeatedly  and  wept  profusely.  She 
said:  'My  dear  husband,  is  it  possible  that  you 
cannot  see  the  hideousness  of  that  old  orthodox 
type  of  religion,  how  it  separates  people  instead 
of  uniting  them  ?  Why,  it  is  busy  digging  a 
great  pit  between  you  and  me  this  very  minute!' 

"My  tongue  was  loosened  now  and  I  ex- 
claimed: 'It  separates  people  because  the  ma- 
jority of  them  are  so  wicked  they  will  not  accept 
the  scheme  of  salvation  and  be  saved.' 


LOVE    AND   DEATH  3! 

"'And  why  are  the  majority  so  wicked  that 
they  will  not  accept  this  proffered  means  of 
salvation,  if  it  is  the  right  one  ?'  she  asked. 

"'Because  of  the  Fall  of  our  first  parents,  in 
which  all  are  implicated  and  which  leads  us  to 
love  darkness  rather  than  light,  to  love  Satan 
rather  than  God,  and  to  reject  the  Son  of  God, 
who  came  down  from  Heaven  to  save  such  as 
would  accept  His  proffered  salvation,'  I  replied. 

"She  did  not  speak  for  a  moment,  and  when 
she  did  it  was  with  a  caress  and  an  enticing  little 
way  she  had.  Women,  you  know,  can't  reason. 
They  only  feel  things.  She  said,  'I  don't  feel  a 
bit  responsible  for  what  Adam  and  Eve  are  said 
to  have  done  so  long  ago,  —  and  how  could  it 
have  been  possible  for  us  to  fall  with  them,  when 
we  were  not  yet  born  ?' 

"  I  was  astonished  at  her  audacity  and  replied 
with  firmness,  -  - '  It  is  enough  that  the  Word  of 
God  declares  that  all  fell  with  Adam  and  that 
to  be  saved  from  eternal  condemnation  we  must 
accept  that  salvation,  for  only  those  who  will 
accept  it  can  be  saved.  Though  it  is  true  that 
we  did  not,  like  Adam,  have  a  choice  as  to  our 
line  of  conduct  in  the  beginning,  we  have  a 
choice  now  as  to  whether  we  will  accept  the 
proffered  means  of  salvation  or  not.  That  is 
quite  enough.' 

"Well,  yes  — '  she  said  in  a  hesitating  man- 
ner, '  perhaps  it  is  enough  for  those  who  believe 


32  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

in  the  Fall  of  Man,  but  for  those  who,  on  the 
contrary,  believe  in  the  slow  but  continuous 
Rise  of  Man,  it  is  not  enough ! ' ' 

"Now,  sir,"  continued  Mr.  Mills,  panting  for 
breath,  "you  can  understand  from  this  remark 
what  a  complete  heretic  my  wife  had  become. 
Orthodoxy  is  built  on  the  Fall.  Take  that 
away  and  what  becomes  of  the  scheme  of  salva- 
tion reared  on  that  foundation  ?  It  falls  flat. 
I  used  every  means  I  could  think  of  to  convince 
my  wife  of  the  awful  mistake  she  was  making. 
I  pleaded  with  her.  I  prayed  with  her  and  for 
her,  day  and  night.  We  wept  until  our  tired 
eyes  could  scarcely  see.  We  fell  ill  and  our 
children  became  sad  and  apprehensive.  At 
length  our  misery  was  unendurable.  I  saw 
that  we  could  not  go  on  thus,  and  I  became  con- 
vinced that  my  wife  would  lead  my  children 
astray  if  she  continued  with  them  any  longer. 
The  thought  of  her  poisoning  their  young  minds 
with  heterodox  ideas,  of  her  leading  them  into 
the  broad  road  which  ends  in  eternal  damna- 
tion —  or  at  least  everlasting  separation  from 
their  God  and  His  blessed  abode,  and  from 
myself  who  loved  them  so  well  and  was  in  a 
measure  responsible  for  them  —  determined 
me  to  send  her  to  her  old  home  and  to  undertake 
the  care  of  the  children  alone." 

Mr.  Mills  paused  for  breath,  and  gave  a  sign 
that  he  needed  still  more  of  the  stimulant. 


LOVE    AND    DEATH  33 

Abel  waited  patiently  for  the  sick  man  to  finish 
his  sad  narration,  as  he  realized  the  uselessness 
of  trying  to  get  him  to  postpone  it.  It  seemed 
to  Abel  like  a  deathbed  confession,  which  one 
is  impelled  by  some  unseen  power  to  make 
before  the  departure  from  this  world. 

"I  finally  placed  my  children  in  Christian 
private  schools,  since  I  found  it  impracticable 
to  teach  them  myself." 

"Did  the  little  ones  prosper?"  asked  Abel, 
after  waiting  some  moments  for  him  to  con- 
tinue. 

"I  can't  say  that  they  did."  He  paused, 
and  then  added  abstractedly,  "I  steadfastly 
refused  to  eat  of  the  forbidden  fruit  which  my 
wife  offered  me.  No,  sir,  I  would  not  so  much 
as  touch  one  of  the  books  which  had  led  my 
wife  astray.  I  abominated  them  and  I  burnt 
them!" 

"And  the  children?"  asked  Abel  again,  per- 
ceiving that  Mr.  Mills  had  dropped  into  a  pain- 
ful reverie. 

"No,  they  did  not  get  along  well.  The  fault 
lay  with  my  wife.  She  had  accustomed  them 
to  her  ways,  which  lacked  proper  discipline. 
The  youngest  son,  always  a  delicate  lad,  soon 
died,  calling  pitifully  for  his  mamma,  when  he 
should  have  been  calling  on  the  name  of  Christ. 
The  other  ran  away  and  has  never  been  heard 
of  since.  My  daughter  Heloise  —  alas!  it  is 


34  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

she  who  is  making  a  mutiny  now  —  like  her 
mother  before  her." 

"In  what  respect?"  asked  Abel,  exhibiting 
keen  interest,  although  he  tried  to  restrain 
himself. 

"The  revolt  is  the  same  —  precisely.  When 
Heloise  returned  from  your  service  last  evening 
and  had  given  me  a  synopsis  of  your  sermon,  I 
said  to  her,  — '  I  am  getting  well  so  fast  now 
that  by  another  Sunday  we  shall  be  able  to  join 
Mr.  Allen's  church.'  I  expected  a  ready  assent. 
On  the  contrary,  I  not  only  failed  to  secure  a 
ready  assent,  but  I  failed  to  secure  even  a  reluc- 
tant one." 

"  Has  Heloise  up  to  the  present  been  a  dutiful 
daughter?" 

"Certainly!  Certainly!  up  to  now.  Always 
ready  to  obey  my  slightest  command.  Yes, 
she  has  been  a  good  girl.  She  is  of  a  very  reti- 
cent nature,  and  rarely  expresses  her  opinions. 
I  have  not  seen  as  much  of  her  as  I  could  wish." 

"Is  Heloise  a  student  of  the  Bible?" 

"She  reads  it  to  me  daily.  Yes,  she  is  well 
informed  in  Holy  Writ,  and  in  orthodox  liter- 
ature on  the  subject." 

"Perhaps  your  daughter  out  of  respect  to 
your  wishes  has  never  read  heretical  books?" 
suggested  Abel. 

"As  to  that  I  can't  say  positively.  But  why 
should  I  expect  a  daughter  to  respect  my  wishes 


LOVE    AND    DEATH  '       35 

when  my  wife,  pledged  to  obedience  to  me  at  the 
marriage  altar,  secretly  poisoned  her  own  mind 
with  heresy  until  she  must  needs  turn  against 
me  in  the  most  deadly  manner  ?  Alas,  I  fear 
they  are  alike,  else  why  this  new  revolt?" 

Mr.  Mills  paused,  overcome  with  pain  and 
exhaustion,  and  again  Abel  in  response  to  a 
motion  from  him  gave  him  some  medicine. 

Presently  he  resumed: 

"The  first  mutiny  caused  the  death  of  my 
wife,  at  least  she  died  soon  after  she  returned 
home.  This  second  mutiny  is  hurrying  me  to 
mine." 

"Dear  brother,  are  you  sure  the  two  women 
knew  they  were  reading  heretical  books  ?  They 
may  have  been  what  are  called  scientific  books, 
supposed  to  be  free  from  religious  bias,  but 
which  have  the  same  effect  on  people's  minds  as 
books  whose  aim  it  is  to  destroy  orthodoxy." 

"Ah,  but  I  warned  them  against  reading  the 
books  of  science,  so  called,  just  as  I  warned 
them  against  those  of  a  distinctly  heretical  cast. 
No,  there  is  no  excuse  for  them!  Women  are 
born  law-breakers,  like  their  mother  Eve,  who 
was  warned  by  God  Himself.  However,  I  have 
one  consolation  ever  present  with  me." 

The  countenance  of  the  sick  man  became 
animated,  and  a  gleam  of  hope  gave  his  sunken 
eyes  a  new  and  a  last  radiance. 

"What  is  that,  my  dear  brother?" 


36  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

"Thank  Heaven,  I  did  not,  with  my  wife, 
partake  of  the  forbidden  fruit!  I  have  always 
accepted  with  all  my  heart  the  Atonement, 
which  the  fall  of  our  first  parents  made  necessary 
for  the  salvation  of  the  Elect!  Surely  a  crown 
is  reserved  for  me  in  that  eternal  life  of  bliss  to 
which  I  am  hastening!"  gasped  the  dying  man, 
and  before  the  minister  could  bring  his  daughter 
to  his  bedside,  or  even  call  for  help,  he  had 
passed  away. 

When  Heloise  entered  the  room,  Abel,  help- 
less, tongue-tied,  extended  his  arms  toward  her. 
Without  an  instant's  hesitation  she  glided  into 
them  and  bowed  her  head  on  his  shoulder. 

For  several  moments  they  stood  thus  in  the 
deep  silence  of  the  death  chamber,  both  of  them 
stunned  by  the  shock,  profoundly  sad,  and  yet 
filled  with  that  joy  which  passeth  all  under- 
standing. 


CHAPTER  III 
THE  BACHELOR'S  APARTMENT 


"THE  sole  purpose  of  the  world  is  to  provide  a 
physical  basis' for  the  growth  of  spirit."  —  Goethe. 


III 


The  Bachelor's  Apartment 

* 

ABEL'S  apartment  of  three  large  rooms  and 
a  "museum"  combined  comfort  with  ele- 
gance in  a  way  which  sometimes  made  him  feel  a 
little  uneasy  —  it  was  so  luxurious,  and  so  artistic. 
The  apartment  had,  however,  been  selected 
and  furnished  for  him  by  the  women  of  his  con- 
gregation without  his  knowledge  and  hence 
without  his  consent. 

For  the  adornment  of  these  rooms  nothing 
had  seemed  too  good  or  too  expensive,  and  to 
their  decoration  some  of  his  congregation  had 
contributed  their  very  choicest  art  treasures. 
In  fact,  such  an  immense  quantity  of  things, 
useful  and  ornamental,  had  poured  into  the 
place  rented  to  receive  contributions,  that  a 
strenuous  committee  had  to  be  appointed  to 
rigidly  refuse  such  things  as  would  not  con- 
tribute either  to  the  comfort  of  their  beloved 
pastor  or  to  the  artistic  beauty  of  the  trio  of 
rooms.  The  museum,  a  room  as  large  as  many 
of  the  poor  have  for  living  quarters  for  a  whole 
family,  commenced  by  being  a  store-room  or 
"  big  closet,"  but  the  autocratic  dictation  of  the 
committee,  combined  with  their  "superfine 

39 


40  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

taste,"  as  some  sarcastically  called  it,  or  their 
"idiotic  meddling,"  as  others  brutally  dubbed 
their  discriminating  efforts,  aroused  so  much  re- 
sentment, more  particularly  among  those  who 
were  refused  any  representation  at  all,  that  finally 
it  was  agreed  to  turn  the  room  into  a  sort  of  mu- 
seum to  which  all  who  desired  could  contribute 
something.  After  that,  the  way  little  keepsakes 
poured  into  the  depot  was  amusing,  and  the 
promptness  with  which  the  heart-burnings  sub- 
sided was  a  relief  to  all  concerned. 

At  length  the  three  large  rooms  were  models 
of  order,  comfort,  and  artistic  embellishment. 
As  for  the  one-time  store-room,  it  had  been 
metamorphosed  into  a  well-arranged  cabinet 
of  curios  and  love-tokens.  Naturally  there  fol- 
lowed in  the  wake  of  all  this  loving  enterprise  a 
grand  reception  given  by  the  ladies,  to  which 
their  husbands,  as  ignorant  as  Abel  himself  of 
what  had  been  going  forward,  were  invited. 
Their  minister  was  warned  not  to  fail  to  attend, 
as  he  valued  his  life. 

Ah,  what  a  charming  comedy  the  women  of 
Abel's  congregation  played  that  night  of  the 
house-warming!  The  men,  though  they  re- 
sponded gallantly  to  the  invitation  of  the  ladies, 
were  not  expecting  comedy.  Indeed,  they  were 
looking  for  a  conspiracy  of  some  kind  calculated 
to  deplete  their  pocket-books;  hence  tragedy. 

The  women  had  kept  their  secret  well,  and 


THE  BACHELOR'S  APARTMENT  41 

the  men  were  generally  of  the  opinion  that  these 
elegant  apartments,  which  they  saw  for  the  first 
time,  belonged  to  a  certain  absentee  bachelor 
of  aesthetic  taste  and  ample  resources.  Prob- 
ably some  woman  of  fertile  imagination  and  a 
gift  for  fiction  had  given  them  a  misleading 
scent,  or  it  may  have  been  that  one  of  their  own 
number  had  ventured  to  account  for  things  he 
did  not  know  by  circulating  a  theory  of  his  own 
built  on  suspicion.  They  were  all  agreed,  how- 
ever, that  the  bachelor  was  a  fool  to  permit  a 
parcel  of  women  to  hold  church  meetings  and 
informal  receptions  in  apartments  so  fine  and 
artistic.  Why,  the  women  even  took  out  his 
books  —  beautiful  ones  —  and  passed  them 
around  like  sweetmeats!  Then  they  proceeded 
to  scribble  in  them  or  mark  their  infantile  pref- 
erences for  certain  passages!  The  room  stored, 
supposedly,  with  the  fruits  of  the  bachelor's 
many  travels,  was  infested  by  women  to  such  a 
degree  that  it  was  useless  for  any  modest  man 
to  try  and  make  his  way  thither. 

The  evening  wore  away,  in  apprehension  for 
the  men  —  as  a  rule  —  and  in  delight  for  the 
women. 

After  the  refreshments,  there  was  a  call  for 
silence.  An  important  announcement  was  to 
be  made.  Then  did  the  men  in  this  new  para- 
dise, created  by  woman,  quake  and  tremble. 
"Now  we  are  in  for  it,"  "Now  we  must  pay  the 


42  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

fiddler,"  was  the  expression  more  or  less  ap- 
parent on  their  faces  —  with  the  exception  of 
the  minister. 

Though  Abel  chose  plain  and  unadorned 
living  for  himself,  he  enjoyed  seeing  others 
happy  in  the  possession  of  beautiful  things, 
provided  they  came  honestly  by  them  and  made 
good  use  of  them.  He  thought  the  bachelor 
was  doing  a  sensible  thing  in  placing  his  apart- 
ment at  the  disposal  of  these  good  women  while 
he  was  making  one  of  his  extended  trips.  Since 
God  Himself  had  placed  the  world  at  man's 
disposal,  why  should  not  man  give  freely  as  he 
had  received  ? 

Nature  had  dowered  Abel  with  an  extremely 
artistic  cast  of  mind,  together  with  the  heart  of 
a  poet.  But  he  had  systematically  starved  the 
art  side  of  himself  since  he  had  become  a  Chris- 
tian. His  present  sleeping-room  was  small 
and  mean  in  appearance,  though  kept  scrupu- 
lously clean  by  the  poor  old  widow  who  let  it  at 
good  rates  to  her  minister.  Abel  prepared  his 
sermons  in  the  pastor's  study  connected  with 
the  church,  which  was  little  more  than  a  book- 
filled  closet  with  a  tiny  fireplace  that  smoked 
the  livelong  winter.  And  in  summer  the  den 
was  like  a  furnace. 

Consequently,  no  one  had  passed  with  dila- 
tory steps  through  the  rooms  of  the  supposed 
rich,  touring  bachelor  with  keener  enjoyment 


THE  BACHELOR  S  APARTMENT       43 

than  orthodox  Abel;  indeed,  words  of  admira- 
tion flowed  from  his  lips,  and  he  examined  with 
interest  everything  from  a  rare  painting  by  one 
of  the  modern  masters  down  to  a  penwiper 
which  was  a  cunning  bit  of  art  in  its  way. 

The  evening  thus  far  had  been  for  him  a  sea- 
son of  unalloyed  enjoyment,  and  he  looked  at 
the  woman  preparing  to  make  the  announce- 
ment with  mild  and  affectionate  interest. 

Usually,  announcements  were  made  by  cer- 
tain leading  men  of  the  church,  when  the  min- 
ister did  not  make  them.  To-night,  it  was  a 
woman,  of  the  advanced  type,  of  course,  who 
was  bent  on  usurping  this  prerogative  of  the 
masculine  sex.  She  was  not  a  dowdy.  That 
was  a  distinct  relief.  If  a  woman  must  talk  in 
public,  she  should  at  least  be  pretty,  for  it  is  not 
to  be  expected  that  she  will  say  anything  of  an 
edifying  nature.  Even  in  the  matter  of  an  an- 
nouncement, a  man  could  put  in  two  words  a 
statement  for  which  a  woman  would  require 
twenty.  These  are  sentiments  universally  held  to 
be  true  by  men  and  shared  more  or  less  by 
woman  herself. 

Needless  to  remark,  the  tall,  handsome  woman 
who  at  last  secured  attention  did  not  share  these 
views.  She  was  evidently  bent  on  making  a 
little  speech  in  connection  with  the  announce- 
ment. Her  first  words  were  mostly  lost,  as  the 
attention  secured  was  of  the  rustling  variety.  At 


44  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

length  silence  reigned  and  it  was  comparatively 
easy  to  hear  her  low,  but  distinct  voice: 

"...  If  it  is  the  duty  of  our  beloved  pastor  to 
attend  to  our  spiritual  needs,  it  is  equally  our 
duty  to  secure  for  him  his  material  requirements. 
I  need  not  call  attention  to  the  faithfulness  with 
which  he  has  done  his  part  in  our  mutual  obliga- 
tions, or  how  neglectful  in  some  respects  we 
have  been  in  ours.  Some  of  us  at  last  became 
conscious-stricken,  and  we  have  put  our  heads 
and  our  purses  together  in  an  endeavor  to  cancel 
some  of  our  sins  of  omission.  As  we  saw  no 
way  to  enlarge  the  church  study  and  make  it 
a  comfortable  place  for  him  to  work,  and  as 
we  found  that  his  sleeping  apartment  was  equally 
uncomfortable,  we  determined  to  obviate  both 
defects  by  preparing  other  rooms,  with  what 
result  we  leave  our  minister  and  our  brothers  to 
determine;  for  the  rooms  which  you  have  been 
promenading  through  this  evening  with  such 
lively  interest,  are  those,  once  bare  and  much 
the  worse  for  wear,  which  we  have  secured,  and 
which  we  have  done  our  best  to  beautify  and 
render  habitable.  I  will  only  say  in  conclusion 
that  if  they  afford  our  beloved  pastor  but  a  frac- 
tion of  the  enjoyment  which  we  have  experienced 
in  preparing  them  for  his  use,  our  enterprise 
will  be  a  grand  success." 

Whether  the  sprinkling  of  men  present  really 
enjoyed  playing  the  part  of  the  silent,  subjective 


THE  BACHELOR'S  APARTMENT  45 

minority  cannot  be  accurately  known.  The 
chances  are  that  they  would  have  felt  more 
natural  if  the  announcement  had  contained  the 
expected  claim  on  their  pocket-books,  and  the 
good-looking  sisters  had  done  a  certain  amount 
of  begging  in  an  artful  but  charming  way.  As 
it  was,  there  was  nothing  for  them  to  do  but 
cheer  their  sisters  over  an  enterprise  they  had 
had  no  hand  in  executing.  This  they  did  with 
a  rather  bad  grace,  and  an  awkward  silence  fol- 
lowed some  reluctant  hand-clapping. 

The  predicament  of  the  minister  was  also  a 
little  awkward.  He  recalled  that  Christ,  his 
Master,  had  been  born  in  a  manger,  was  reared 
in  poverty,  and  during  his  ministry  had  no- 
where to  lay  his  head,  excepting  as  his  friends 
impulsively  supplied  him  with  a  temporary 
resting-place.  His  close  disciples,  of  whom 
Abel  had  ever  striven  to  be  one,  should,  he  had 
held  up  to  this  very  night,  lead,  like  their  Master, 
a  life  of  unworldliness  and  of  severe  self-denial. 
But  now  the  women  of  his  congregation  had  pre- 
pared a  sumptuous  home  for  him!  Should  he 
accept  or  reject  their  bounty  ? 

At  this  moment  there  flashed  upon  him  the 
pretty  scene  which  took  place  in  Bethany  in  the 
house  of  Simon  the  leper,  so  he  began: 

"  Dear  sisters,  —  I  will  be  frank  with  you 
and  admit  that  I  have  felt  some  reluctance  in 
accepting  your  costly  gift.  Every  man  who 


4Q  ABELARD   AND    HELOISE 

has  read  his  Bible  attentively,  or  even  profane 
history,  knows  how  ready  the  sister  sex  is  to 
make  costly  sacrifices  for  those  she  loves,  and 
that  these  sacrifices  sometimes  tend  towards 
the  undoing  of  man  and  the  suppression  of  her- 
self. ...  I  doubt  not  that  Eve  plucked  the  for- 
bidden fruit  more  because  she  hoped  to  give 
Adam  a  pleasant  surprise  than  from  the  expec- 
tation of  any  private  gain  to  herself.  .  .  .  Christ 
seems  to  have  better  understood  the  loving 
heart  of  woman  than  anyone  else,  for  we  read 
that  he  quickly  forgave  the  sins  of  the  woman 
whom  Moses  would  have  caused  to  be  stoned, 
because  she  loved  much.  While  as  for  the 
woman  who  poured  the  costly  ointment  upon 
His  head,  which  His  disciples  thought  should 
have  been  sold  for  the  benefit  of  the  poor,  He 
not  only  did  not  condemn  her,  but  actually 
praised  her,  declaring  that  wheresoever  the 
Gospel  should  be  preached  throughout  the 
whole  world,  this  act  should  be  spoken  of  as  a 
memorial  of  her.  These  considerations  lead 
me  to  believe  that  Christ  under  the  present  cir- 
cumstances would  have  freely  accepted  the  gift 
of  a  beautiful  home  so  freely  offered  by  women 
whose  hearts  are  no  less  warm  and  generous 
than  was  that  of  the  woman  who  had  the  ala- 
baster box  of  very  precious  ointment.  Enter- 
taining such  a  belief,  it  is  delightful  for  me,  who 
try  to  follow  in  the  footsteps  of  the  Master,  to 


THE  BACHELOR'S  APARTMENT  47 

accept  your  costly  gift  in  the  spirit  in  which  it  is 
made.  But  if  I  accept  these  fine  and  artistic 
rooms  I  trust  you  will  all  enjoy  them  with  me. 
Continue  to  hold  your  meetings  in  the  reception 
room,  as  you  have  been  doing  of  late,  and  when 
you  want  an  old-fashioned  sociable,  like  we 
have  been  having  to-night,  all  the  rooms  are 
yours.  Dear  sisters,  I  thank  you  from  the  bot- 
tom of  my  heart  for  this  new  proof  of  your  kind- 
ness. May  the  loving  Master  reward  and  bless 
you!" 

For  a  whole  year  the  comfortable  home  which 
the  women  had  made  for  him  proved  to  be  a 
paradise  indeed,  and  many,  many  hours  of  inno- 
cent content  had  he  experienced  therein. 


CHAPTER  IV 
THE  MARRIAGE  OF  ADAM  AND  EVE 


"THE  book  of  Genesis  is  now  known  to  be  a  pro- 
duction of  a  very  composite  character,  —  a  compila- 
tion of  fragments;  and  of  fragments  very  unlike  one 
another,  both  as  regards  subject-matter  and  style. 
These  fragments  were  put  together  by  an  editor 
belonging  to  a  late  period,  who  was  more  anxious  to 
retain  and  preserve  all  he  could  than  to  make  his 
various  fragments  agree."  —  Rev.  John  Page  Hopps. 

"THE  foundation  stone  of  orthodoxy  has  always 
been  the  dogma  of  the  Fall  of  Man  and  of  the  conse- 
quent lost  and  ruined  condition  of  the  race.  In 
accordance  with  this  theory,  the  one  great  work  of 
religion  has  been  to  save  men  from  their  sins.  .  .  . 
But  study  of  Jewish  thought  and  life  has  shown  that 
this  whole  Eden  story  was  a  late  importation  from  a 
pagan  people.  The  older  prophets  knew  nothing  of  it. 
And  even  Jesus,  who  is  said  to  have  been  supernatu- 
rally  sent  to  save  us  from  the  effects  of  the  fall,  never 
makes  the  slightest  allusion  to  it.  Besides  this,  science 
has  demonstrated  that  man  has  steadily  risen  from 
the  first,  and  it  makes  all  stories  of  original  perfection 
impossible  of  belief  on  the  part  of  free  and  intelligent 
people. 

"And  thus  we  are  now  able  to  explain  the  world's 
evil,  vice,  crime,  suffering  and  death  in  the  light  of 
theories  much  more  honorable  to  God  and  more 
helpful  for  man."  — Rev.  Minot  J.  Savage. 


The  Marriage  of  Adam  and  Eve 


ABEL  returned  to  his  study,  after  the  death  of 
Mr.  Mills,  with  a  mind  not  only  overcome 
by  the  beauty  of  Heloise,  but  also  full  of  pity  for 
the  unfortunate  Helen,  so  ruthlessly  robbed  of 
her  children,  because  she  no  longer  believed  in 
The  Fall.  He  asked  himself  if  he  could  have  put 
away  a  wife,  the  mother  of  his  children,  because 
of  a  difference  in  religious  belief.  He  thought 
not,  and  his  heart  ached  as  he  saw  in  his  mind's 
eye  the  lonely  woman  in  her  desolation,  refusing, 
like  another  Rachel,  to  be  comforted.  He  did 
not  feel  the  same  depth  of  sorrow  for  her  hus- 
band, because  he  had  Christ  and  the  hope  of 
everlasting  bliss  to  sustain  him. 

With  a  sigh,  the  minister  glanced  about  him 
as  he  sat  in  his  armchair;  and  his  eye  fell  upon 
a  large  bunch  of  flowers.  They  had  been  placed 
upon  his  desk  during  his  absence.  The  sur- 
prise and  the  pleasure  it  gave  him  changed  for  a 
moment  the  current  of  his  thoughts. 

"Ah,  how  kind  is  the  heart  of  woman  and 
how  often  it  has  been  trampled  on,"  he  said, 
half  aloud,  as  he  rose  to  examine  the  token  of 
affection.  Having  inhaled  the  fragrance,  and 

51 


52  ABELARD   AND    HELOISE 

reseated  himself,  he  dropped  again  into  a  rev- 
erie, leaning  his  head  on  his  hand,  his  elbow 
resting  on  the  arm  of  his  comfortable,  well- 
cushioned  chair. 

After  he  had  spent  some  time  in  deep  and 
painful  meditation  he  got  up  and  paced  back- 
wards and  forwards  through  his  rooms,  every 
one  of  which  bore  eloquent  testimony  to  the 
generous  loyalty  of  woman.  A  new  and  terrible 
conflict  raged  in  his  breast.  Hitherto  infidelity 
in  the  shape  of  vague  suggestions  had  often 
flitted  through  his  consciousness,  but  now  it  laid 
hold  on  him  with  a  force  that  threatened  to  wreck 
all  he  had  formerly  held  sacred.  For  if  one  did 
not  believe  in  the  Fall  of  Man,  what  could  one 
believe  in  ? 

Since  the  time  of  his  conversion,  Abel  had 
read  and  studied  his  Bible  in  a  devout  feminine 
spirit.  He  assiduously  cultivated  the  feeling 
that  it  was  not  for  him  to  reason  why  when 
reading  the  Word  of  God,  but  piously  to  accept 
it.  Now  it  is  one  thing  to  read  the  Bible  with 
unreasoning  —  and  unreasonable  —  faith,  and 
quite  another  to  study  it  with  a  mind  alert  for 
truth. 

He  keenly  realized  that  the  mental  chaos  he 
was  now  in  was  due  to  the  terrible  shaking  up 
he  had  received  through  the  revelations  of  Mr. 
Mills.  He  could  not  throw  off  this  domestic 
tragedy.  Moreover,  he  felt  that  the  same  abyss 


THE    MARRIAGE    OF    ADAM    AND    EVE          53 

which  had  parted  the  father  and  the  mother  of 
the  woman  he  loved  was  now  yawning  between 
himself  and  Heloise,  though  yet  obscurely.  Else 
why  had  she  refused  to  join  his  church  ? 

Abel  ceased  pacing  up  and  down,  hurriedly 
seized  his  Bible,  sat  down  in  his  armchair  and 
began  to  read  it,  beginning  with  the  very  first 
sentence,  "In  the  beginning  God  created  the 
heavens  and  the  earth."  The  verses  which 
immediately  followed  were  delightful  reading. 
Their  refreshing  largeness  began  to  restore  his 
balance.  God  had  seemed  to  create  every- 
thing in  an  easy,  let-there-be  sort  of  manner 
which  was  truly  God-like.  There  was  not  a 
jarring  note  in  the  whole  first  chapter.  Even 
when  God  had  consulted  with  His  colleagues, 
saying:  "Let  us  make  man  in  our  own  image 
after  our  own  likeness;  and  let  him  have  do- 
minion over  the  fish  of  the  sea,  and  over  the 
fowl  of  the  air,  and  over  the  cattle,  and  over  all 
the  earth,  and  over  every  creeping  thing  that 
creepeth  upon  the  earth;"  there  seemed  not  to 
have  been  the  slightest  difference  of  opinion. 
Man  was  made  in  the  image  of  God,  "In  the 
image  of  God  created  he  him,  male  and  female 
created  he  them." 

Having  made  them  in  his  own  image,  He 
proceeded  to  bless  them  and  to  tell  them  to  be 
fruitful  and  to  multiply  and  replenish  the  earth 
and  subdue  it,  and  have  dominion  over  it,  for 


54  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

all  was  placed  under  man's  jurisdiction.  Noth- 
ing was  exempted.  There  was  apparently  no 
string  attached  to  anything.  The  very  last 
verse  of  the  first  chapter  declared  that  God  saw 
everything  He  had  made  and  behold  it  was  very 
good,  and  that  the  evening  and  the  morning 
were  the  sixth  day. 

So  far,  it  was  a  succession  of  easy  triumphs 
of  the  omnipotent  skill,  and  when  all  was  com- 
plete the  earth  had  been  given  freely  to  man  to 
subdue,  replenish  and  control. 

But  when  he  read  the  second  chapter  Abel 
perceived  incongruities  and  irreconcilable  state- 
ments as  never  before.  He  recalled  that  he 
himself  had  been  guilty  of  teaching  his  people 
that  though  it  was  stated  in  Holy  Writ  that  God 
had  finished  the  heavens  and  the  earth  and 
the  host  of  them  in  six  days,  they  must  not 
understand  these  days  to  be  like  our  own  of 
twenty-four  hours  each;  for  each  Genesis  day 
undoubtedly  meant  a  long  period  of  time.  The 
fact  that  these  six  days  were  described  as  em- 
bracing an  evening  and  a  morning  each,  he 
had  gotten  over  in  a  way  which  might  have  sug- 
gest to  an  unbiased  mind  the  subtlety  of  the 
serpent.  Still,  as  it  was  in  the  interest  of  ortho- 
doxy, the  method  could  not  be  wrong,  Abel  had 
thought.  It  now  struck  him  as  a  logical  con- 
sequence that  if  each  of  the  six  Genesis  days 
had  reference  to  a  long  period  of  time,  then  the 


THE  MARRIAGE  OF  ADAM  AND  EVE    55 

day  which  followed  the  six,  that  is,  the  seventh 
day,  must  have  reference  to  a  long  period  of 
time  also.  And  how  did  God  spend  the  seventh 
day  ?  Why,  He  simply  rested  and  blessed  the 
day  because  He  had  rested.  That  the  Great 
Maker  of  the  heavens  and  the  earth  should 
rest  during  long  ages,  and  bless  and  sanctify 
that  period  on  account  of  His  taking  this  pro- 
digious rest,  seemed  to  Abel  a  very  un-God-like 
proceeding.  In  fact,  the  writer  of  the  second 
chapter,  by  telling  how  long  God  rested  after 
having  finished  the  earth,  made  Him  out  pro- 
digiously lazy.  Next  he  made  Him  prodig- 
iously vain  by  saying  that  He  blessed  this  one 
day,  lazily  spent,  because  in  it  he  had  rested 
from  all  His  work.  The  second  scribe  also 
gave  the  demoralizing  impression  that  for  God 
to  rest  is  a  more  holy  way  for  Him  to  spend  His 
time  than  for  Him  to  work. 

However,  this  improbability  sank  into  insig- 
nificance when  compared  with  others  which 
revealed  themselves  as  he  continued  to  read. 
Evidently  a  scribe  of  an  altogether  different 
stamp  from  that  of  the  person  who  wrote  the 
first  chapter  was  trying  his  hand  in  telling  how 
God  had  made  the  heavens  and  the  earth,  one 
with  a  passion  for  details  of  a  decidedly  un- 
pleasant and  belittling  character.  If  the  first 
chapter  was  calculated  to  put  man  in  an  ex- 
cellent humor  with  himself  and  his  Maker,  the 


56  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

second  seemed  intended  to  prick  the  bubble  of 
pride  in  this  intimate  sonship. 

Having  progressed  thus  far,  Abel  began  to 
perceive  that  the  second  scribe  had  also  made 
God  shortsighted,  petty,  and  cruel;  because,  to 
have  finished  making  the  earth  and  not  until 
then  to  have  discovered  that  there  was  not  a 
man  to  till  the  soil  was  assuredly  shortsighted; 
and  after  that  discovery,  to  make  but  one  man 
was  petty.  It  also  looked  petty  for  the  God 
who  could  do  all  things  to  potter  over  the  mak- 
ing of  a  garden  and  to  turn  the  man  He  had 
made  into  a  mere  tenant-gardener.  Above  all, 
it  was  absolutely  cruel  to  place  in  the  midst  of 
this  little  garden  a  tree  of  magical  properties, 
and  then  to  command  this  poor,  forlorn,  dust- 
made  gardener  not  to  eat  of  it,  for  "  in  the  day 
that  thou  eatest  thereof  thou  shalt  surely  die." 

Abel  read  on  with  strangely  increasing  dis- 
gust. What  an  inferior  conception  of  the  Lord 
God  the  second  scribe  of  Genesis  had,  to  be 
sure!  To  finally  discover  that  it  was  not  good 
for  the  man  He  had  made  to  be  alone,  and  to 
attempt  to  remedy  this  defect  by  making  out  of 
the  ground  beasts  and  birds,  only  to  find  out 
that  among  all  these  creatures  there  was  not  one 
helpmeet  for  this  lonesome  individual,  was  an- 
other belittling  assertion  to  make  of  a  God. 
Why,  it  would  have  been  a  foregone  conclusion 
of  mere  finite  mind  that  a  man  would  not  be 


THE  MARRIAGE  OF  ADAM  AND  EVE    57 

satisfied  with  a  beast  or  a  bird  for  a  companion! 
But  Abel  conquered  his  impatience.  He  wanted 
to  see  what  effect  the  rest  of  the  chapter  would 
have  upon  him,  now  that  his  eyes  and  mind  were 
bent  on  seeking  truth  and  reason  and  nothing 
else.  Very  slowly,  therefore,  he  read  the  verses 
which  describe  the  making  of  Eve  by  the  Lord 
God,  and  her  presentation  to  Adam  by  their 
Maker,  and  Adam's  little  speech  of  acceptance, 
finishing  with  the  assertion,  "And  they  were 
both  naked,  the  man  and  his  wife,  and  were  not 
ashamed."  Abel  was  astonished  that  he  had 
never  noticed  before  how  absurd  and  how  in- 
congruous was  the  little  narrative  of  the  manu- 
facture of  Eve  and  of  her  marriage  to  Adam. 
From  beginning  to  end  it  was  full  of  childish 
statements.  It  was  possible  of  course  that  a  third 
scribe  was  responsible  for  the  manufacture  of 
Eve,  since  she  is  made  in  a  very  different  man- 
ner from  Adam.  Either  the  scribe  who  told  of 
the  making  of  Adam  had  become  more  inven- 
tive or  still  another  romancer  had  tried  his 
genius  at  the  making  of  woman. 

If  so,  the  third  writer  must  bear  off  the  palm 
for  dramatic  details.  As  a  preliminary  to  the 
making  of  woman,  poor,  lone  Adam  was  put 
into  a  deep  sleep,  so  deep  that  the  Lord  God 
could  with  impunity  open  his  side,  break  off  one 
of  his  ribs  and  close  up  the  flesh,  without  Adam's 
being  aware  of  the  operation.  Out  of  this 


58  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

single  rib  the  Lord  God  proceeded  to  make  a 
woman,  and  when  He  achieved  this  feat  He 
brought  her  to  Adam,  who  must  have  been 
awake,  for  he  at  once  made  a  nice,  but  rather 
curious  marital  speech:  "This  is  now  bone  of 
my  bone,  and  flesh  of  my  flesh:  she  shall  be 
called  Woman  because  she  was  taken  out  of 
Man!"  The  question  arose  in  Abel's  mind  — 
who  told  Adam  that  the  Lord  God  had  taken  a 
rib  from  him  while  he  was  asleep,  and  did  the  in- 
formant add  that  God  had  also  removed  some 
of  his  flesh  ?  It  would  seem  so,  for  Adam 
labored  under  the  delusion  that  Eve  was  like- 
wise flesh  of  his  flesh;  whereas  she  was  merely 
bone  of  his  bone.  Adam's  further  statement 
that,  "Therefore  shall  a  man  leave  his  father 
and  his  mother,  and  cleave  unto  his  wife,"  Abel 
thought  premature,  seeing  there  was  no  mother 
or  father  on  either  side,  and  consequently  none 
to  leave. 

Abel  now  reached  the  third,  and  fatal,  chap- 
ter of  Genesis.  He  felt  his  heart  beat  violently. 
This  chapter  had  never  been  attractive  to  him, 
but  he  realized  its  importance,  being  well  aware 
that  if  Ezra  had  not  seen  fit  to  insert  this  frag- 
ment—  this  short  and  exceedingly  dramatic 
story  by  some  unknown  writer —  into  the  Bible, 
which  he  had  put  together  about  450  B.C.,  and 
wherein  he  allowed  himself  to  play  the  double 
part  of  compiler  and  editor,  there  would  have 


THE  MARRIAGE  OF  ADAM  AND  EVE    59 

been  no  orthodoxy  such  as  the  world  has  strug- 
gled under  for  several  centuries.  Therefore 
Abel  thought  that  the  third  chapter  called  for 
most  careful  scrutiny  by  anyone  anxious  for 
the  stability  of  the  religion  built  on  the  Fall  of 
Man. 

It  opened  by  calling  attention  to  the  serpent, 
which  the  writer  —  or  dramatist  —  declares 
was  more  subtle  than  any  beast  the  Lord  God 
had  made.  Was  it  a  beast  ?  Did  the  Lord 
God  make  it  at  the  time  he  made  the  other 
beasts,  and  if  so,  why  was  no  mention  made  of  a 
creature  so  potent  as  to  be  able  to  cope  with 
God  Himself  ?  Evidently  the  beast  —  if  beast  it 
was — was  not  only  gifted  with  speech,  but  with 
intuition  and  knowledge  of  a  scientific  nature. 
Else  why  had  he  been  able  to  make  himself  per- 
fectly understood  in  conversation  with  Eve  ? 
Why  did  he  ask  if  they  were  permitted  to  eat  of 
every  tree  in  the  garden,  if  he  had  not  already 
divined  the  truth  ?  And  when  Eve  had  com- 
municated to  him  the  knowledge  that  the  use  of 
one  tree  was  prohibited  them,  with  the  warning 
that  if  they  ate  of  it  they  should  surely  die;  why 
did  he  assure  her  they  would  not  die  after  eating 
of  it,  if  he  had  no  knowledge  as  to  whether  the 
tree  produced  good  or  bad  fruit  ? 

Assuredly  the  creature  called  the  serpent  was 
in  some  respects  better  informed  than  the  one 
whom  the  dramatist  calls  the  Lord  God.  Adam 


60  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

and  Eve  did  not  die  after  eating  of  the  forbidden 
tree,  which  fact  Abel  had  heretofore  accounted 
for  by  saying  that  they  had  died  a  spiritual 
death.  But  now  Abel  found  himself  asking, 
how  was  it  that  Adam  and  Eve  could  have 
sinned  so  wofully  in  partaking  of  the  fruit  of 
the  tree  of  knowledge,  if  the  Lord  God  had 
created  them  so  blind  and  stupid  that  they  could 
not  distinguish  good  from  evil  ?  To  be  sure, 
the  account  was  very  conflicting,  since  in  verse 
six  the  scribe  declares  that  when  the  woman  saw 
that  the  tree  was  good  for  food,  and  that  it  was 
pleasant  to  the  eye,  and  a  tree  to  be  desired  to 
make  one  wise,  she  took  of  the  fruit  thereof  and 
did  eat,  and  gave  also  to  her  husband  and  he 
did  eat.  While  in  the  very  next  verse,  it  states 
that  the  eyes  of  both  of  them  were  opened  - 
thus  intimating  they  had  been  blind  before  they 
ate  of  the  forbidden  fruit.  Yet  this  story,  puz- 
zling as  it  is,  so  puzzling  that  more  than  one 
reader  has  marveled  whether  its  author  may 
not  have  been  a  subtle  joker,  has  probably  been 
fraught  with  more  consequences  to  the  human 
family,  for  good  or  evil,  than  any  story  ever  told. 
Abel  paused  some  moments  before  proceeding 
further.  He  wondered  what  there  was  about 
this  little  account  of  the  eating  of  the  fruit  of  the 
tree  of  knowledge  to  have  made  such  a  tre- 
mendous impression  and  have  had  such  a  won- 
derful influence  on  the  most  advanced  peoples 


THE  MARRIAGE  OF  ADAM  AND  EVE    6l 

of  the  world.  Surely  there  must  be  some  ad- 
mixture of  truth  in  it.  What  is  it  ?  Can  it  be 
possible  that  mankind  are  at  heart  cowards  in 
respect  to  the  acceptance  of  new  truth,  and  like 
to  hug  the  delusion  to  their  breasts  that  to  pluck 
from  the  tree  of  knowledge  is  a  God-forbidden 
thing  bringing  death  in  its  wake  ? 

And  here  the  vision  of  his  own  deacons  rose 
before  Abel's  mind.  Suppose  he  should  sug- 
gest to  them  that  it  would  be  well  to  revise  their 
hoary  creed  and  the  articles  of  faith  —  what 
kind  of  a  reception  would  the  suggestion  re- 
ceive ?  The  very  idea  gave  him  a  sort  of  vertigo. 
He  felt  so  ill  that  he  put  his  Bible  down,  took 
his  hat,  and  walked  out  into  the  open  air. 

Zola  has  somewhere  said  that  "One  cannot 
yet  require  of  children  and  women  the  bitter 
heroism  of  reason."  Ah,  but  is  the  sterner  sex 
yet  eager  to  practise  the  bitter  heroism  of  reason  ? 
With  his  deacons  in  mind,  Abel  had  no  delusions 
on  that  score. 


CHAPTER  V 
THE  HEROISM  OF  REASON 


"NoT  always  can  flowers,  pearls,  poetry,  protesta- 
tions, nor  even  home  in  another  heart,  content  the 
awful  soul  that  dwells  in  clay.  It  arouses  itself  at 
last  from  these  endearments,  as  toys,  and  puts  on  the 
harness,  and  aspires  to  vast  and  universal  aims."  — 
Emerson. 

IF  each  home  were  a  small  republic  in  which 
equality  had  been  established  at  the  start,  —  the 
marriage  altar,  —  an  act  of  simple  justice  to  the  two 
human  beings  concerned,  it  must  follow  as  day  the 
night  that  justice  will  find  its  way  throughout  the 
length  and  breadth  of  our  fair  land,  and  that  then 
and  only  then  will  our  big  sham  republic  become 
The  Great  American  Republic,  beloved  and  respected 
by  all  the  nations  of  the  earth.  —  M.  /.  T. 

"LovE  covereth  all  sins." 


*U&*»*rl»t»'»tl^ 


The  Heroism  of  Reason 


HAD  not  delicacy  battled  with  Abel's  feel- 
ings, he  would  have  proposed  marriage  to 
Heloise  at  once.  When  he  did  call,  a  few  days 
after  the  funeral  of  her  father,  she  was  not  at  home. 
Then  he  concluded  he  would  better  propose  to 
her  by  letter.  He  was  haunted  by  the  feeling 
that  she  would  refuse  to  marry  him,  and  if  so, 
she  would  be  likely  to  give  her  reasons.  If  she 
sent  these  to  him  in  writing,  he  could  consider 
them  more  carefully  in  the  privacy  of  his  study 
than  would  be  possible  if  he  were  unduly  ex- 
cited by  her  presence. 
His  letter  ran  as  follows: 

Heloise,  my  beloved! 

Thank  God,  your  eyes  confessed  a  few  days  ago 
what  your  lips  might  never  have  admitted.  You  love 
me!  I  know  it!  Else  why  that  long,  grave,  steadfast 
look  of  serene  content,  when  our  eyes  happened  to 
meet  ? 

Confess,  sweetheart!  —  you  thought  my  mind  was 
so  full  of  the  needs  of  my  people,  of  God  and  His  great 
desire  to  be  one  with  His  creatures,  that  you  could 
refresh  your  heart  without  fear  of  consequences.  You 
thought  that  at  church  human  love  gave  way  to 

65 


66  ABELARD   AND    HELOISE 

divine.  Perhaps  it  does  when  people  are  old,  but 
when  a  man  is  young  and  falls  in  love  —  Heaven  only 
knows  how! — with  a  maid,  and  the  maid  with  him, 
it  is  dangerous  for  these  two  to  exchange  glances 
anywhere  in  God's  universe.  Yes,  I  feel  sure  of  it!  — 
sure  that  the  God  of  Love  is  likely  to  do  just  what  He 
has  done  with  us  —  constrain  the  two  chosen  ones  to 
gaze  into  each  other's  eyes  until  their  hearts  are  inex- 
tricably welded  together.  Ah,  what  bliss  to  be  joined 
in  wedlock  by  God  Himself! 

And  now,  my  beautiful  Heloise,  I  must  urge  that, 
"what  therefore  God  hath  joined  together  let  no  man 
put  asunder."  You  shall,  if  it  so  pleases  you,  con- 
tinue to  learn  of  Darwin  and  his  disciples,  while  I 
hope  you  will  not  object  to  my  remaining  a  follower 
of  the  humble,  loving  Nazarene.  He  is  still  for  me 
the  most  attractive  of  teachers. 

Heloise!  Let  me  hear  quickly  if  you  will  be  mine 
in  the  sight  of  man,  as  you  are  already  in  the  sight  of 
God.  Ever  your  own 

ABEL. 

Abel  awaited  a  response  to  his  letter  with 
keen  impatience.  He  hoped  that  a  reply  might 
come  by  the  trusty  messenger  who  had  carried 
his  missive  to  her,  and  that  he  would  thus  be 
saved  some  hours  of  torturing  anxiety.  But  the 
messenger  returned  empty-handed,  saying  that 
the  young  lady  had  merely  thanked  him  and 
dismissed  him  with  the  remark  that  she  would 
not  keep  him  waiting,  as  she  could  not  reply 
immediately.  That  meant  refusal!  Abel  was 


THE    HEROISM    OF    REASON  67 

sure  of  it.  He  wanted  to  fly  at  once  to  Heloise 
and  stop  her  mouth  with  kisses  —  to  defy  her 
objections.  But  he  reflected  that  such  hot  im- 
patience might  destroy  all  of  his  hopes.  He 
had  here  to  deal  with  a  girl  whose  father  was  a 
Scotchman  of  the  most  unyielding  type,  and 
whose  mother  had  had  a  will  equally  strong. 
He  must  go  slow  —  keep  cool  —  endeavor  to 
reason.  In  the  struggle  that  was  at  hand  Abel 
realized  that  his  passionate  heart,  his  eloquent 
tongue,  would  avail  him  nothing;  he  was  face 
to  face  with  the  "heroism  of  reason." 

At  length  her  reply  came.  He  tore  open  the 
envelope  and  read  with  a  sinking  heart: 

Abelard,  dearest: 

I  am  sure  you  will  not  mind  if  I  call  you  Abelard, 
since  my  name  is  Heloise;  and  since,  too,  the  same 
reason  is  parting  us  which  parted  those  faithful  lovers, 
so  dear  to  every  romantic  heart. 

Yes,  the  religion  of  disunion  is  still  with  us,  and 
still  actively  at  work.  Dear  Abelard,  when  you  ask 
me  not  to  let  man  put  asunder  what  God  hath  joined 
together  you  overlook  the  fact  that  the  creed  you 
preach  does  put  asunder  the  man  and  the  woman, 
while  pretending  to  unite  them.  Its  spoken  vows  in 
the  ceremony  of  matrimony  raise  the  man  on  a  pedestal 
while  they  pledge  the  woman  to  lifelong  vassalage  to 
the  being  thus  artificially  set  above  her.  On  this 
account  the  feeling  of  oneness  which  lovers  are  cogni- 
zant of  —  if  truly  united  by  God  —  must  at  the 


68  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

orthodox  marriage  altar  receive  a  deadly  chill;  and 
the  unequal  position  they  assume  give  rise  to  a  thou- 
sand misunderstandings  —  if  not  to  incalculable  suf- 
fering and  virulent  hatred. 

Dear  Abelard,  because  I  regard  the  real  marriage  of 
myself  with  yourself  a  holy  act,  too  holy  to  be  be- 
smirched with  falsehood,  I  shall  be  far  away  when 
you  read  these  lines;  far  as  to  physical  presence,  but 
ever  with  you  in  loving  sympathy  and  oneness  of 
spirit. 

Yes,  dear  Abelard,  it  is  best  that  I  should  go. 
Even  if  it  were  possible  for  me  to  accept  the  orthodox 
marriage  rite,  I  could  not  fill  the  place  I  ought  to  fill 
as  the  wife  of  an  orthodox  minister. 

Perhaps  you  do  not  know  how  heterodox  I  am, 
since  a  good  many  disciples  of  modern  science  retain 
their  places  in  orthodox  churches.  How  they  manage 
to  sit  on  two  stools  so  far  apart  is  past  my  compre- 
hension. I  cannot  assume  what  I  do  not  feel.  But 
let  me  give  you  an  idea  of  my  heterodoxy  and  perhaps 
you  will  find  my  going  away  easier  to  bear. 

I  will  begin  by  frankly  admitting  that  I  now  read 
what  you  doubtless  look  upon  as  the  Word  of  God 
more  to  see  what  religious  people  have  believed  in 
the  past  than  to  see  what  I  ought  to  believe  in  the 
present.  I  do  not  believe  in  the  Fall  of  Man  in  the 
beginning,  hence  reject  the  Atonement.  How  could 
man  fall  at  the  start  ?  Since  —  as  a  rule  —  there  is 
no  such  thing  as  continuous  punishment  in  this  world 
for  past  wrong-doing,  what  reason  have  we  for  be- 
lieving that  there  is  everlasting  punishment  in  any 
other  world  of  God's  universe  ?  I  think  that  we 
shall  be  reasonably  happy  anywhere  so  long  as  wfl 


THE    HEROISM    OF    REASON  69 

faithfully  seek  the  Right  and  do  it.  Micah  sums  up 
his  idea  of  religion  by  asking:  "What  does  the  Lord 
require  of  thee  but  to  deal  justly,  to  love  mercy,  and 
to  walk  humbly  with  thy  God  ?" 

But  what  is  Right,  what  is  Justice,  what  is  Mercy, 
and  what  does  it  mean  to  walk  humbly  with  thy  God  ? 
To  answer  these  questions,  your  religion  teaches  you 
to  go  to  the  Bible  and  accept  its  standards,  forgetting 
that  the  righteousness,  the  justice,  the  mercy,  and  the 
very  gods  of  the  people  of  the  past  are  outgrown. 

For  me  the  doctrine  that  bids  me  escape  the  burden 
of  my  own  sins  by  casting  them  on  another  is  not  only 
cowardly  but  immoral.  It  is  contrary  to  universal 
law  and  to  individual  experience. 

Those  who  clamor  for  a  new  religion  are  right! 
They  are  wrong  only  when  they  suggest  that  it  be 
invented.  The  failure  of  old  orthodoxy  to  satisfy 
modern  man  lies  in  the  fact  that  it  is  an  invented 
religion.  The  Fall  was  invented,  the  curse  that  fol- 
lowed it  was  invented.  Then  came  the  master  in- 
vention of  the  Scheme  of  Salvation;  preparing  an 
everlasting  paradise  for  the  few,  while  leaving  the 
great  majority  to  everlasting  torment  —  a  religious 
concept  which  could  only  be  held  by  men  who  had 
not  yet  awakened  to  a  glimmering  sense  of  the  brother- 
hood of  man. 

Then  came  Christ,  who  sought  to  spread  a  higher 
ethical  sense  among  his  followers.  But  the  autocratic 
"Fathers  of  the  Church"  found  Christ  too  human, 
too  womanly,  so  they  doctored  Him! 

I  am  aware  that  your  love  of  Christ  is  of  a  very  ideal 
nature,  and  that  you  hold  Him  up  to  your  people  in 
a  very  helpful  and  inspiring  manner.  At  the  same 


7O  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

time  I  hope  that  you  will  do  your  part  towards  giving 
us  what  we  need  so  much  —  a  new  religion  —  one 
based  upon  the  enlightened  sense  and  growing  needs 
of  man  and  woman,  rather  than  on  subtle  fancies 
which  rob  God  of  wisdom,  dignity  and  justice. 

Dear  Abelard,  do  not  feel  sad  that  I   am  going 
away  —  for  I  am  not  really  gone.     Only  my  body 
will  be  traveling  around  somewhere  or  other  when  you 
receive  this  letter.     My  real  self  is  with  you! 
Dearest,  believe  me  to  be 

Very  truly  yours  HELOISE. 

Abel  had  no  sooner  finished  reading  this  let- 
ter than  he  seized  his  hat  and  great  coat,  intent 
on  rushing  to  the  house  which  had  lately  been 
the  home  of  Heloise.  The  landlady  must  know 
something  of  her  future  movements,  and  he 
must  know  as  quickly  as  possible  all  that  she 
knew,  at  least. 

On  his  threshold  he  was  stopped  by  a  cabman 
often  employed  by  some  of  the  members  of  his 
church. 

"Well,  Tom,  what  is  it?"  Abel  asked  rather 
impatiently. 

"Mrs.  Symonds  is  pretty  bad,  sir.  She  wants 
you,  if  it  is  not  troubling  you  too  much,  to 
come  to  her  right  away,  sir  —  if  you  will  be  so 
good/' 

"I  will  go  without  delay,"  answered  Abel, 
after  mentally  ejaculating  to  himself,  "Thank 
Heaven,  it  is  not  a  wedding!" 


THE    HEROISM    OF    REASON  "]\ 

"  Is  she  much  worse  ? "  he  asked  as  he  de- 
scended the  steps. 

"  She  has  been  going  down  hill  very  fast  since 
you  called  a  month  ago." 

"Ah,  is  it  so  long  since  I  called  ?  I  have  been 
very  remiss  in  my  duty  as  a  pastor,"  said  Abel 
with  a  deep  sigh. 

"  People  knows  as  how  busy  you  must  be  with 
the  funerals  and  marriages  and  the  meetin's 
and  the  visitin's,"  ventured  Tom,  noticing  that 
the  cheek  of  the  minister  was  a  little  more 
sunken  than  when  he  had  last  seen  him. 

"Yes,  that  is  true,  but  the  sick  should  not  be 
neglected,"  replied  the  conscience-stricken  Abel. 

As  he  entered  the  bedroom  Mrs.  Symonds 
exclaimed: 

"Oh,  how  good  of  you  to  come  at  once!  I 
felt  that  I  must  see  you." 

"Don't  tell  me  you  are  worse!"  exclaimed 
Abel,  clasping  the  woman's  outstretched  hand 
warmly  in  his  own.  "  We  cannot  do  without  you." 

"No?  Sit  down!  I  have  something  to  tell 
you,  Mr.  Allen.  You  know  what  a  matter-of- 
fact  person  I  have  always  been  —  a  veritable 
Martha?" 

The  minister  nodded  his  head. 

"With  a  temperament  phlegmatic  rather 
than  flighty  or  impressionable  ?" 

Again  the  minister  nodded  his  head,  wonder- 
ing why  she  was  preparing  the  way  so  carefully. 


72  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

"Also,  I  have  the  reputation  of  being  a  truth- 
ful person  —  have  I  not  ?" 

"Most  decidedly!" 

"Uncomfortably  truthful  sometimes?"  pur- 
sued Mrs.  Symonds. 

"I  am  well  aware  that  you  are  one  of  those 
rare  people  who  'cannot  brook  the  shadow  of  a 
lie,'"  gallantly  admitted  Abel. 

"Well,  I  am  going  to  be  very  blunt  with  you 
right  now,  although  I  know  you  will  not  approve 
of  what  I  have  been  doing  or  intend  to  do.  But, 
before  I  confess,  please  read  these  three  letters 
which  I  have  received  to-day.  They  are  from 
very  responsible  people." 

Abel  took  the  letters  from  the  excited  woman, 
and  as  he  looked  at  them,  the  expression  of  his 
countenance  grew  very  grave. 

While  he  read,  Mrs.  Symonds  closed  her 
heavy,  grief-worn  eyes  and  remained  mute. 
She  was  a  large  woman,  with  the  broad  brow 
of  an  organizer,  yet  not  handsome.  She  had 
given  but  little  thought  to  dress  and  society,  but 
since  she  had  "gotten  religion,"  she  had  been 
the  recognized  leader  among  the  women  of  her 
church.  She  had  one  son  who  had  gone  west 
to  make  his  fortune,  and  had  promised  to  send 
for  his  mother  as  soon  as  his  circumstances 
would  permit.  Two  years  had  passed  by  since 
he  had  bidden  her  good-by,  radiant  with  youth 


THE    HEROISM    OF    REASON  73 

and  ambition.  During  the  first  year  his  letters 
were  hopeful,  but  the  second  year,  they  were 
less  frequent  and  sometimes  very  depressing. 
He  was  evidently  passing  through  a  great  strain 
of  some  kind,  although  he  wrote  no  bad  news. 

"My  dear  Mrs.  Symonds,  why  did  you  not 
tell  me  of  your  horrible  suffering  before  this  ? 
To  have  kept  all  that  is  revealed  in  these  letters 
pent  up  within  your  breast  for  so  long! — ah! 
no  wonder  you  have  been  ill!"  He  seated  him- 
self by  the  suffering  woman,  taking  her  cold 
hands  in  his,  but  in  truth  he  was  at  his  wits'  end. 
He  could  think  of  nothing  to  say  calculated  to 
cheer  a  woman,  and  a  mother,  whose  sufferings 
were  of  the  nature  of  Mrs.  Symonds.  After  a 
moment  of  deep  silence,  she  herself  broke  it  by 
saying: 

"I  see  you  dare  not  offer  me  any  consolation." 

"Only  God  can  heal  a  soul  so  fearfully 
stricken  as  yours  has  been,"  was  Abel's  rather 
evasive  reply. 

"Tour  God  —  with  his  everlasting  hell?" 

Abel  was  silent. 

After  waiting  a  moment  for  him  to  speak, 
Mrs.  Symonds  continued: 

"  No,  I  did  not  send  for  you  to-day  expecting 
to  obtain  any  help,  and,  as  for  your  God,  I  want 
nothing  more  to  do  with  Him!" 

Abel  was  still  silent. 

"When  I  came  to  myself,  after  the  fainting 


74  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

spell  which  the  telegram  announcing  my  son's 
suicide  threw  me  into,  and  when  I  realized  that 
I  had  to  live  —  I  am  one  of  those  women  who  are 
as  hard  to  kill  as  a  cat  —  I  began  to  wonder 
where  I  could  look  for  a  little  comfort  to  still  the 
torment  in  which  I  found  myself.  The  very 
thought  that  there  was  a  possibility  of  my  son 
being  in  hell  made  life  hideous  for  me.  I  soon 
reached  the  conclusion  that  it  was  useless  to 
appeal  to  any  of  the  people  of  my  own  church  — 
those  in  authority,  I  mean.  You  all  believe— 
or  pretend  to  believe  —  in  everlasting  punish- 
ment for  those  who  do  not  accept  the  Scheme 
of  Salvation,  and  my  son  was  a  free-thinker, 
like  his  father  before  him.  There  is  one  woman 
among  your  members  who  is  not  at  all  orthodox, 
I  happen  to  know  —  but  who  still  continues  to 
attend  your  meetings  because  she  likes  you  very 
much  indeed.  I  also  happened  to  know  that 
she  had  been  dabbling  in  spiritualism!  I  went 
to  her  and  told  her  about  the  telegram,  which 
merely  stated  that  my  son  had  taken  his  life. 
I  asked  her  if  she  could  refer  me  to  a  medium 
who  might  possibly  give  me  some  particulars. 
She  told  me  of  a  man  with  a  wonderful  gift; 
she  said  he  was  a  seer  like  those  described  in 
the  Bible.  She  begged  me  not  to  speak  of  him 
as  gifted  in  this  respect  to  anybody,  as  he  was 
not  a  professional  medium,  and  he  feared  it 
would  hurt  his  business  if  it  got  out  that  there 


THE    HEROISM    OF    REASON  75 

was  anything  abnormal  about  him.  She  fur- 
ther said  that  he  was  a  Catholic  and  very  de- 
vout. I  asked  her  to  arrange  a  meeting  be- 
tween us  and  she  consented  to  do  so. 

"  He  came  to  me  the  very  next  day  and  sat  in 
the  chair  you  are  now  occupying.  I  told  him 
of  the  telegram  and  that  I  wished  him  to  give 
me  the  particulars  of  my  son's  suicide,  and  to 
see  if  he  could  tell  me  what  had  become  of  the 
immortal  soul  of  my  poor  boy.  He  bowed  his 
head,  then  looked  steadfastly  upward  and  pres- 
ently began  to  describe  the  manner  in  which 
my  son  had  released  himself  from  his  body,  re- 
peating the  sad  exclamations  addressed  to  my 
son  by  a  companion  —  one  of  the  three  who 
were  with  him  immediately  after  the  terrible 
act  had  been  committed — while  he  lay  dying. 
Next  he  told  me  that  he  saw  my  son's  spiritual 
self  among  the  happy  souls  and  that  he  looked 
peaceful  and  content." 

"Did  he  describe  your  son's  death  as  the 
writers  of  these  three  letters  have  done  ?" 

"The  details  are  exactly  the  same." 

"And  were  the  words  addressed  to  your  son 
by  his  companion  given  correctly  ? " 

"Word  for  word!" 

"  Um  —  I  see  these  letters  do  not  state  the 
cause  of  your  son's  suicide.  Was  the  seer  more 
explicit  ?" 

"No.      My  son  had  thought  best  not  to  tell 


76  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

me  of  his  trouble,  and  I  would  not  ask.  Some- 
times I  think  there  was  a  woman  at  the  bottom 
of  it!  Some  frivolous,  heartless  creature  who 
leads  men  on  — " 

As  she  spoke  a  servant  entered  and  rather 
reluctantly  announced  that  a  young  woman  in 
deep  mourning  had  just  arrived  in  a  carriage, 
and  that  she  insisted  upon  seeing  Mrs.  Symonds 
at  once,  as  she  had  news  of  her  son. 

The  sick  woman  sat  up  in  her  bed,  dazed,  and 
in  a  hollow  voice  ordered  her  admitted  at  once. 
She  apparently  did  not  hear  the  protests  of  Abel, 
who  feared  a  shock,  and  who  wanted  to  offer  to 
retire  during  the  interview  if  she  insisted  upon 
receiving  the  visitor. 

Scarcely  had  the  maid  left  the  room  when  the 
door  opened  and  a  girl  of  twenty  flew  to  the 
bedside.  She  was  evidently  a  lady,  handsome 
in  feature  and  attractive  in  appearance,  and 
yet — oh,  so  wretchedly  worn  and  wan!  She 
seemed  not  to  see  the  minister  as  he  rose 
and  stepped  back,  but  pushed  his  chair  aside 
and  impulsively  knelt  down  beside  the  bed,  and 
clasped  Mrs.  Symonds'  hand  in  hers. 

At  first  her  words  were  so  intermingled  with 
sobs  that  it  was  almost  impossible  to  understand 
her.  But  gradually  she  spoke  more  coherently. 

"  Yes  —  it  is  I  who  am  the  cause  of  your  son's 
death! — I  who  loved  him  better  than  life  it- 
self! This  is  the  way  it  happened .  He  fell  in  love 


THE    HEROISM    OF    REASON  fj 

with  me  —  I  am  sure  of  it  —  now  when  it  is  too 
late  —  and  I  with  him.  Our  happiness  was 
perfect  —  at  least  mine  was !  —  until  in  the 
midst  of  it  one  of  my  friends  told  me  that  my 
lover  was  still  engaged  to  a  lovely  girl  in  the 
east.  That  he  really  loved  her  and  only  made 
love  to  me  because  I  was  an  heiress,  and  he  saw 
no  other  way  of  supporting  his  true  love  and  his 
mother,  to  whom  he  was  very  devoted.  Well,  I 
thought  I  found  out  —  that  it  was  true  —  what 
I  now  know  was  false!  —  and  I  became  mad 
with  jealousy.  I  not  only  refused  to  see  him 
again  but  followed  some  mischievous  advice. 
I  let  another  man  make  furious  love  to  me,  and 
I  accepted  him.  The  marriage  day  was  quickly 
set.  We  were  to  have  been  married  the  very 
hour  that  your  son  —  only  I  became  so  deadly 
ill  that  the  marriage  had  to  be  postponed.  But 
in  the  meantime  your  son — !"  Unable  to  go 
on,  the  young  woman  buried  her  face  in  the 
bedclothes  and  wept  aloud. 

Mrs.  Symonds,  who  had  been  regarding  the 
stranger  with  a  hard,  grim  countenance,  felt 
the  tears  rush  to  her  eyes,  the  first  which  had 
visited  them  since  she  had  received  the  telegram. 
One  short,  sharp,  hard  wrestle  with  her  soul 
and  it  was  all  over.  Almost  involuntarily  she 
put  her  hand  tenderly  on  the  bowed  head  and 
said,  "My  dear  daughter!" 

All  this  time  Abel  had  been  standing  in  the 


78  ABELARD   AND    HELOISE 

background,  not  knowing  whether  to  stay  or  to 
go,  a  totally  useless  and  unobserved  fragment  of 
humanity.  He  made  up  his  mind  to  steal 
quietly  away;  for  he,  too,  had  a  love  affair  which 
was  not  going  smoothly.  He  slipped  out  with- 
out attracting  attention,  and  as  he  closed  the 
door  softly  after  him  he  saw  that  the  two  women 
were  fast  locked  in  each  other's  arms. 


CHAPTER  VI 
IN  ANDROMEDA 


"THREE  things  I  hate,"  said  Tolstoy  to  me,  "autoc- 
racy, orthodoxy,  and  militarism,  and  these  are  the 
pillars  of  the  Russian  State." 

"THE  world  of  Andromeda  is  decidedly  an  inferior 
one.  To  give  you  an  idea  of  the  poor  mental  caliber 
of  its  inhabitants,  I  will  cite  two  examples,  selecting 
the  subjects  of  religion  and  politics,  as  they  are  gen- 
erally the  best  criticisms  of  the  value  of  a  people. 
In  religion,  in  place  of  seeking  God  in  nature,  and  of 
basing  their  judgment  on  science,  instead  of  aspiring 
to  the  truth,  and  of  using  their  eyes  to  see  and  their 
reason  to  comprehend  —  in  a  word,  in  place  of  estab- 
lishing the  foundations  of  their  philosophy  upon 
knowledge  as  exact  as  possible  of  the  order  which 
governs  the  world  —  they  are  divided  into  sects,  who 
are  voluntarily  blind,  and  believe  they  render  homage 
to  their  pretended  God  by  ceasing  to  reason,  and 
think  they  adore  Him  in  maintaining  that  their  ant- 
hill is  unique  in  space;  by  reciting  phrases,  and  in 
injuring  other  sects  .  .  .and  in  authorizing  mas- 
sacre and  wars.  Their  doctrines  contain  assertions 
which  seem  expressly  imagined  to  outrage  common 
sense.  These  are  precisely  those  which  constitute 
the  articles  of  their  faith  and  belief!"  —  Camtlle 
Flammarion,  in  "Lumen," 


VI 


In  Andromeda 

* 

AS  soon  as  he  left  Mrs.  Symonds',  Abel  lost 
no  time  in  finding  his  way  to  the  house 
where  Heloise  and  her  father  had  been  boarding 
for  several  months.  It  was  a  high,  brick  building, 
with  little  to  distinguish  it  from  the  rest  of  the 
houses  in  the  block,  but  to  Abel  it  was  invested 
with  a  sacred  charm  of  so  transcendent  a  nature 
that  he  found  himself  trembling  as  he  rang  the 
door-bell. 

A  servant  opened  the  door,  and  in  response 
to  his  inquiry  for  the  mistress  led  him  into  "the 
best  room,"  where  he  seated  himself  in  an 
arm-chair,  which  was  comfortable,  but  not 
ornamental. 

The  room  was  like  the  chair.  Luxury  was 
nowhere,  but  comfort  everywhere.  Abel 
stepped  to  the  book-case  and  glanced  over  the 
rows  of  books,  not  that  he  particularly  cared 
what  was  read  by  the  people  of  the  house,  but 
because  he  wished  to  appear  at  his  ease  when 
the  sharp-eyed  landlady  should  rush  in  upon 
him  —  for  he  knew  that  her  black  eyes  were  like 
needles  and  her  tongue  a  two-edged  sword 
There  was  not  a  book  in  the  library  that  was 

81 


32  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

not  of  the  most  approved  religious  texture,  while 
the  magazines  and  papers  on  the  center  table 
were  of  similar  quality.  He  wondered  how 
Heloise  had  managed  to  stray  so  far  from  the 
church;  for  her  father,  doubtless,  had  always 
surrounded  her  with  just  such  an  atmosphere. 
It  was  unaccountable  —  as  unaccountable  as  the 
sudden  appearance  of  the  subtle  beast  in  the 
paradise  of  Eden. 

Ah,  but  how  he  loved  her,  this  strange  Hel- 
oise! He  must  discover  her  whereabouts  at  any 
cost;  then  he  would  decide  what  next  to  do. 
He  loved  her  almost  to  idolatry,  but  truth  com- 
pelled him  to  realize  that  he  also  feared  her. 

The  door  opened  and  the  landlady  appeared 
with  very  red  eyes.  "You  must  excuse  me," 
she  made  haste  to  say,  as  they  seated  themselves, 
"for  looking  so  done  up.  We  have  had  a 
double  loss,  first  the  father,  and  then  the  daugh- 
ter." 

"What  do  you  mean?"  asked  Abel  quickly, 
turning  very  pale  and  revealing  at  once  his  in- 
terest in  Heloise,  which  the  landlady  already 
suspected,  and  which  he  had  intended  to 
conceal. 

"Well,  I  mean  it's  the  same  as  two  funerals 
—  only  the  loss  of  the  daughter  is  a  thousand 
times  the  harder  to  bear!" 

"Then  Miss  Mills  is  not  — ?"  said  the  min- 
ister with  a  sigh  of  relief. 


IN    ANDROMEDA  83 

"She  is  dead  to  us,"  interrupted  Mrs. 
Brookes,  "for  we  shall,  I  fear,  never  see  her 
again.  She  has  gone  such  a  long  way  off.  I 
never  in  my  life  took  such  a  liking  to  a  woman, 
young  or  old!  Usually  I  don't  like  my  own  sex 
for  boarders;  they  are  always  underfoot,  trying 
to  save  a  few  pennies  by  doing  a  bit  of  washing 
or  cooking  something  on  the  sly,  and  they  al- 
ways want  a  lot  of  waiting  on.  Oh,  the  rights 
I've  had  with  them  has  made  an  old  woman  of 
me  before  my  time!  But  in  these  days,  when 
it's  hard  to  get  boarders,  you  can't  always  be 
particular.  You  must  take  what's  to  be  got,  if 
you're  going  to  make  ends  meet.  If  I  could 
pick  and  choose,  I'd  room  and  board  only  young 
men  belonging  to  my  own  church.  As  it  is  I'm 
glad  to  get  anybody,  occasionally  —  just  so  they 
are  not  infidels!  I  do  draw  the  line  there.  Not 
that  they  could  hurt  me!  I  have  long  been  settled 
in  my  belief,  but  they  might  injure  my  children, 
who  have  already  given  me  a  heap  of  trouble. 
You  see  they  go  to  the  public  school  and  pick 
up  a  lot  of  trash  which  is  called  science  now- 
adays, and  they  ask  me  a  lot  of  questions  - 
until  I  shut  them  up  and  tell  them  they  ought  to  be 
ashamed  of  themselves  and  to  go  to  the  Word 
of  God  for  the  knowledge  which  is  not  of  man's 
making,  and  therefore  not  to  man's  undoing.'' 

"Do  they  seem  inclined  to  take  your  advice  ? 
Do  they  love  their  Bibles?"  asked  Abel,  won- 


84  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

dering  how  he  could  turn  the  conversation  into 
a  channel  which  would  give  him  the  informa- 
tion he  sought,  without  showing  how  much  he 
desired  it. 

"Not  as  they  should,  I'm  sorry  to  say.  Why, 
when  I  was  a  girl  we  learned  verses  by  the  hun- 
dreds, and  had  large  portions  of  the  New  Tes- 
tament on  our  tongues'  end,  and  we  got  religion 
early  and  walked  the  safe  and  narrow  path 
without  stumbling.  I  was  ready  to  die  when  I 
was  six  years  old.  My  conversion  was  an  uncom- 
monly clear  one;  the  minister  said  so.  My  chil- 
dren are  everyone  of  them  older  than  I  was  then, 
and  not  one  of  them  is  sure  of  being  in  the  ark 
of  safety.  They  only  say  when  I  question 
them  that,  'They  hope  so.'  They  ought  to  be 
sure,  hadn't  they  ?" 

Mrs.  Brookes  stilled  her  tireless  tongue  for  a 
moment  while  she  gave  Abel  a  piercing  look  of 
inquiry.  She  was  of  the  thin,  bony  type  of 
New  Englander.  Though  not  far  past  forty 
years  of  age,  her  face  was  covered  with  a  net- 
work of  wrinkles,  and  she  was  already  quite 
gray. 

"We  live  in  an  age  when  people  question 
much  and  believe  little,"  replied  Abel,  with  a 
sigh.  "Our  children  are  the  product  of  the 
times,  which  admit  infallibility  nowhere,  not 
even  in  the  Bible.  But  you  must  have  found 
Deacon  Mills  a  man  after  your  own  heart  ?" 


IN    ANDROMEDA  85 

Abel  actually  smiled  at  his  crude  effort  to 
switch  the  conversation  on  to  the  track  on  which 
he  desired  it  to  travel. 

"So  far  as  religion  is  concerned,  he  was  all 
right  —  but  as  a  man  I  didn't  like  him.  He 
beat  me  down  whenever  he  could,  and  if  it  had 
not  been  for  the  generosity  of  Miss  Mills,  I 
should  have  done  a  good  deal  of  work  for  them 
for  almost  nothing.  She  said  her  father  meant 
all  right,  but  that  he  did  not  know  the  worth  of 
woman's  work.  So  every  week  she  paid  me 
some  extra  money." 

"Has  she  money  of  her  own  ?" 

"I  doubt  if  she  has  much.  Her  father  gave 
her  an  allowance,  and  as  she  spent  little  on 
herself,  she  always  seemed  to  be  flush  where 
other  people  were  concerned.  In  fact,  she  was 
an  elegant  person  to  live  with;  but  I  always  had 
my  doubts  as  to  whether  she  was  altogether 
sound  in  the  faith." 

"Why?" 

"Well,  I  asked  her  one  day  if  she  was  as  good 
a  Christian  as  her  father,  and  she  said  it  was 
hard  to  compare  two  Christians  so  utterly  dif- 
ferent; that  he  was  an  autocratic  Christian,  where- 
as she  was  a  democratic  Christian;  that  he  was 
good  of  his  kind,  and  she  hoped  to  be  able  to 
prove  in  time  that  she  was  good  of  her  kind. 
Now,  what  is  a  democratic  Christian,  Mr. 
Allen  ?  I  asked  Miss  Mills  to  please  explain 


86  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

it  to  me,  but  just  then  her  father  called  her  and 
as  he  died  the  very  next  day,  we  were  all  so 
broken  up  afterwards  that  I  forgot  to  find  out." 

"Oh,  there  are  many  kinds  of  Christians  and 
many  sects,"  said  Abel  evasively;  "and  I  sup- 
pose, now  that  women  are  becoming  so  learned, 
we  shall  have  still  more.  Usually  Christianity 
is  based  on  the  Fall  of  Man  and  salvation 
through  the  Atonement.  Possibly  Miss  Mills 
may  base  her  kind  on  the  equality  of  man  before 
the  law  and  the  equality  of  man  and  woman 
in  marriage  —  and  thus  be  able  to  call  it 
democratic  —  a  name  usually  monopolized  by 
politics." 

"I  don't  think  it's  nice  to  associate  a  nasty 
party  name  with  anything  religious.  Politics 
is  only  another  name  for  greed,  while  Chris- 
tianity ought  to  stand  for  just  the  opposite  — 
for  love  of  God  and  one's  neighbor.  Don't  you 
think  so?" 

"Yes,  I  think  so,"  admitted  Abel.  "I  fear 
though  that  Christian  people  are  no  less  greedy 
than  others.  It  is  refreshing  to  hear  that  Miss 
Mills  is  an  exception.  You  say  she  was  pleas- 
ant to  live  with  ? " 

"I  said  it  and  I  mean  it!  Usually  people 
who  board  with  me  impose  on  me  and  my  help 
as  much  as  they  dare,  or  if  they  don't  do  that, 
their  conduct  is  of  the  patronizing  sort  which 
makes  one  feel  like  spitting  in  their  faces.  She 


IN   ANDROMEDA  / 

treated  me  as  if  she  thought  I  was  as  good  as 
herself,  if  not  a  little  better.  My  children  and 
the  servants  adored  her.  She  was  embodied 
sunshine.  You  felt  her  presence  in  the  room 
even  when  you  did  not  turn  around  to 
warm  yourself  in  her  smile.  She  never  put 
a  thing  out  of  place,  and  she  handled  my 
books  and  things  as  if  they  were  her  own.  I 
never  had  any  one  in  the  house  so  easy  to  get 
on  with. 

"But  if  I  had  guessed  that  she  was  not  sound 
in  the  faith,  I  would  never  have  let  her  step  foot 
in  my  house!  —  on  account  of  the  children,  you 
know.  An  unorthodox  Christian  is  a  danger- 
ous person  to  have  around  the  house.  But  how 
was  I  to  tell  ?  Her  father  was  a  man  of  long 
prayers  and  she  knelt  by  his  side  morning  and 
evening,  and  listened  to  him  with  the  face  of  an 
angel.  I  really  could  not  have  had  the  patience 
she  did,  for  he  was  mortal  long,  and  sometimes 
loud  when  he  got  excited;  and  you  know  your- 
self there's  work  to  do  as  well  as  praying.  Then 
the  books  she  used  to  read  to  him!  All  ortho- 
dox! I  don't  see  how  she  could  do  that  if  she 
didn't  believe  what  she  read.  My!  but  she  was 
odd  in  other  ways,  too!" 

"  How  ? "  asked  Abel  quickly,  greedy  to  ex- 
tract every  bit  of  information  that  it  was  pos- 
sible to  obtain. 

"Well,  it's  odd  for  a  woman  naturally  beauti- 


00  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

ful  to  try  and  hide  her  beauty  under  a  bushel, 
as  it  were.  Now,  there's  her  hair,  so  abundant 
and  full  of  life  and  of  a  lovely  golden  brown 
shade  —  what  does  Miss  Mills  do  every  morn- 
ing but  comb  it  straight  back  off  her  forehead  - 
and  do  it  up  in  a  tight  knob  at  the  back  of  her 
head.  You  ought  to  see  it  at  night  when  she 
combs  it  out  before  going  to  bed !  Why,  it's  so 
full  of  electricity,  such  a  mass  of  shining  waves, 
acting  like  they  were  glad  to  be  free,  that  not 
one  of  us  has  been  able  to  resist  the  temptation 
to  ask  her  to  let  us  comb  it  out  for  her.  Of 
course  her  eyes  nothing  can  spoil,  not  even  the 
tears  which  come  reluctantly  to  them,  as  if  they 
realized  they  had  no  business  there.  No,  she 
was  born  to  shed  light  and  be  adored.  With 
her  hair  down  she  reminded  me  of  that  picture 
in  her  room  that  she  called  the  Madonna  of  the 
Grand  Dook.  But  when  I  told  her  she  must 
get  married  and  have  a  chubby  darling  and 
then  let  an  artist  paint  her,  so  we  could  have  a 
beautiful  Madonna  of  our  own,  she  laughed  so 
gaily  that  I  could  not  make  her  out;  and  when 
I  asked  her  what  there  was  so  funny  about  my 
suggestion,  she  said  she  was  amused  by  the  idea 
that  a  good-looking  young  woman  must  be  mar- 
ried as  a  preliminary  to  becoming  a  Madonna. 
I  asked  her  if  all  of  the  Madonnas  had  got  their 
fine,  handsome  children  without  being  married, 
and  she  said  that  she  thought  that  may  have 


IN    ANDROMEDA  69 

been  the  case.  She  did  not  laugh  again,  though, 
for  she  saw  how  dreadfully  shocked  I  was." 

"But  where  has  this  beautiful  Miss  Mills 
flown?"  said  Abel.  "You  have  excited 
my  curiosity  by  saying  that  you  never  expect 
to  see  her  again,  because  she  has  gone  so  far 
away." 

"  She  has  gone  —  or  started  to  go  —  to  the 
opposite  side  of  the  world!" 

Abel's  heart  sank  like  lead  in  his  breast,  and 
he  paled  perceptibly  Mrs.  Brookes  was  be- 
ginning to  feel  uneasy  over  the  length  of  his  stay, 
just  when  she  had  so  many  things  to  do,  and 
did  not  notice  the  effect  of  her  words,  but  in  her 
hurry  to  be  about  her  own  affairs,  she  became 
quite  explicit  and  concise  in  her  replies,  for  her. 

"  She  has  gone  to  the  Pacific  coast,  to  a  place 
called  Los  Angeles.  She  will  pursue  her  calling 
there,  which  is  that  of  a  nurse.  I  suppose  I 
should  say  scientific  nurse,  for  she  was  taught 
at  a  college  and  trained  in  a  hospital.  I  asked 
her  why  she  did  not  choose  to  be  a  doctor  in- 
stead of  a  nurse,  and  she  said  that  it  was  her 
father's  desire  that  she  should  be  a  nurse.  He 
thought  it  was  a  more  feminine  calling,  for 
nurses  are  subject  to  the  doctors  and  women 
ought  always  to  be  in  subjection  to  men.  St. 
Paul  himself  couldn't  beat  Mr.  Mills  on  that 
point!" 

"Why  did  Miss  Mills  go  to  Los  Angeles? 


90  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

Has  she  relatives  there?"  asked  Abel,  amused 
in  spite  of  himself. 

"  I  think  flot,  but  if  you  would  like  to  read 
about  the  place  you  can  take  some  pamphlets 
and  books  which  she  left  for  us.  My  work 
crowds  me  so  that  Heaven  only  knows  when  / 
shall  get  time  to  read  them!" 

At  this  broad  hint  Abel  rose  to  go,  and  with  a 
look  of  relief  Mrs.  Brookes  procured  for  him 
from  the  adjoining  room  the  packet  of  printed 
matter  about  the  Pacific  coast  and  its  principal 
cities  "on  the  other  side  of  the  world." 


CHAPTER  VII 

THE  SONG  OF  THE  WEST 


"THROUGHOUT  history,  the  nations,  races,  and 
classes  which  found  themselves  strongest,  either  in 
muscles,  in  riches,  or  in  military  discipline,  have  con- 
quered and  held  in  subjection  the  rest."  — Mrs.  John 
Stuart  Mill. 

"AND  thy  great  future!     O  it  is  to  me, 
Like  some  enchanted  vision  that  doth  hold 
My  fancy  captive. " 

Eliza  A.  Otis. 


VII 


The  Song  of  the  West 

* 

WHY  had  Heloise  gone  from  the  coast 
of  the  Atlantic  to  the  coast  of  the  Pacific, 
from  the  Athens  on  one  side  of  America  to  the 
Athens  on  the  other  side  ? 

Abel  sat  himself  down  in  his  luxurious  den 
and  endeavored  to  find  out,  if  possible,  the  an- 
swer to  this  question.  The  hour  was  late,  but 
that  was  in  his  favor.  He  could  be  reasonably 
secure  from  interruption  until  nine  o'clock  the 
next  morning. 

Heloise  had  gone  away  asking  for  a  new  re- 
ligion, a  religion  which  recognized,  among 
other  things,  the  equality  of  the  sexes  at  the 
marriage  altar.  Was  she  likely  to  find  it  in 
California  ?  Abel  had  never  heard  that  the 
West,  so  far  as  America  was  concerned,  was 
more  advanced  in  its  religious  conceptions  than 
the  East.  He  was  aware  that  in  respect  to  the 
political  equality  of  the  sexes  the  West  was  de- 
cidedly ahead  of  the  East,  but  surely  the  old 
simon-pure  orthodoxy  was  as  rampant  on  one 
ocean  as  on  the  other  —  and,  for  that  matter, 
all  the  way  between. 

At  this  point  in  his  meditations  he  suddenly 

93 


94  ABELARD   AND    HELOISE 

recalled  some  remarks  Heloise  had  made  to 
him  about  the  coming  greatness  of  the  Pacific- 
West.  She  had  said  that  she  believed  that  its 
development  would  be  as  much  more  glorious 
than  that  of  the  Atlantic-East  as  sunlight  was 
more  luminous  than  moonlight;  that  the  great- 
ness of  the  eastern  half  of  America  was  of  the 
Anglo-Hebraic  order,  which  had  flowered  into 
an  autocratic  aristocracy  of  millionaires,  where- 
as she  felt  sure  the  greatness  of  the  opposite  side 
of  America  would  be  of  a  unique  and  wonderful 
kind,  on  account  of  the  advance  in  the  position 
of  woman.  She  held  that  in  order  to  produce 
a  new  type  of  civilization,  a  truly  great  people, 
instead  of  great  aristocracies  as  heretofore,  each 
sex  must  contribute  its  quota  of  Divinity. 

But  why  had  not  Heloise  gone  to  Colorado, 
where  the  equality  of  the  sexes  had  made  still 
more  progress  ?  Abel  could  not  think  of  an 
answer  to  this  question,  and  he  began  to  search 
through  the  books  and  pamphlets  in  an  attempt 
to  solve  the  mystery. 

First  he  glanced  through  a  big  volume,  a  book 
of  travels  by  Ludwig  Verner  Helms.  There 
were  two  chapters  devoted  to  California,  one 
of  which  had  evidently  been  carefully  read,  as 
the  pages  were  marked  here  and  there  by  faint 
pencil  strokes.  Abel  contented  himself  with 
reading  merely  the  marked  passages.  The 
chapter  described  the  early  settlement  of  Cali- 


THE    SONG   OF   THE   WEST  95 

fornia,  after  Cortez  had  discovered  and  explored 
Lower  California  in  1534,  with  the  help  of 
Franciscan  missionaries.  The  missionaries  were 
all  men  without  family  ties  and  wedded  of 
course  to  the  advancement  of  the  Catholic 
Church.  Priests  went  among  the  natives  with 

O 

a  sword  in  one  hand  and  the  Cross  in  the  other; 
and  to  such  good  purpose  did  they  wield  the 
one  and  exercise  the  other  that  by  the  end  of 
the  eighteenth  century  the  whole  country  was 
practically  under  their  rule.  While  they  gave 
the  savages  a  more  settled  form  of  life  and  some 
conception  of  Christian  morality  and  fellowship, 
they  deprived  them  of  all  ideas  of  liberty  and  all 
powers  of  initiative.  In  their  hands  the  In- 
dians became  mere  docile  agricultural  serfs. 

As  Abel  read  of  the  methods  which  these 
priests  used  to  effect  conversions  he  wondered 
what  Heloise  thought  about  the  process.  It 
was  man's  forceful  way  of  doing  things,  but 
could  woman  have  suggested  a  better  one  under 
the  circumstances  ?  Abel  thought  not,  but  he 
smiled  as  he  read  the  account  of  Captain  Bush- 
by,  who  visited  one  of  the  missions  and  watched 
the  metamorphose  of  savages  into  Christians. 
The  dusky  inhabitants  of  California,  robed  in 
blankets,  were  placed  in  a  row  and  made  to 
kneel  by  an  Alcade  whose  business  it  was  to 
maintain  order.  Their  tutor  was,  in  this  in- 
stance, a  blind  Indian  who  understood  their 


96  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

dialect.  Having  arranged  themselves  in  their 
proper  kneeling  postures  and  become  perfectly 
still,  the  priest  began: 

" '  Santissima  Trinidada:  Dios,  Jesu  Christo,  Es- 
pirito  Santo,'  pausing  between  each  name  to  listen  if 
the  simple  Indians  —  who  had  never  spoken  a  Spanish 
word  before  —  pronounced  these  words  correctly,  or 
anywhere  near  the  mark.  After  they  had  repeated 
the  names  satisfactorily,  their  blind  tutor,  after  a 
pause,  said  'Santos,'  and  recapitulated  the  names  of  a 
great  many  saints,  which  finished  the  morning's  tui- 
tion. .  .  .  If,  as  not  unfrequently  happens,  any  of  the 
captured  Indians  show  repugnance  to  conversion,  it  is 
the  practice  to  imprison  them  for  a  few  days  and  then 
to  allow  them  to  breathe  a  little  fresh  air  in  a  little  walk 
around  the  mission,  in  order  that  they  may  observe 
the  happy  mode  of  life  of  their  converted  countrymen, 
after  which  they  are  again  shut  up,  and  thus  continue 
incarcerated  until  they  declare  their  readiness  to  re- 
nounce the  religion  of  their  forefathers.  As  might  be 
believed,  the  ceremonial  exercises  of  the  pure  Catholic 
religion  occupy  a  considerable  share  of  the  time  of 
these  people;  masses  are  performed  twice  daily,  be- 
sides on  high  days  and  holidays,  when  the  ceremonies 
are  much  grander  and  of  longer  duration.  And  at 
all  the  performances  every  Indian  is  obliged  to  attend, 
under  the  penalty  of  whipping;  and  the  same  method 
of  enforcing  proper  discipline,  as  in  kneeling  at  proper 
times,  keeping  silence,  etc.,  is  not  excluded  from  the 
church  service  itself.  In  the  aisles  and  passages  of 
the  church,  zealous  beadles  of  the  converted  race  are 
stationed,  armed  with  sundry  weapons  of  potent  inj 


THE    SONG    OF    THE    WEST  97 

fluence  in  effecting  silence  and  attention,  which  are 
not  sparingly  used  on  the  refractory  and  inatten- 
tive. These  consist  of  sticks  and  whips,  long  goads, 
etc.,  and  they  are  not  idle  in  the  hands  of  the  officials 
that  sway  them." 

Thus  were  the  natives  of  California  "con- 
verted" to  the  religion  of  the  gentle  Jesus. 

The  second  chapter,  entitled  "California  Re- 
visited," contained  no  pencil  strokes  and  there- 
fore its  leaves  were  quickly  turned,  Abel  merely 
noticing  the  frequent  repetition  of  the  suggestive 
word  "mines."  In  this  hurried  review  Abel 
did  not  once  observe  the  word  "priest."  Evi- 
dently "another  spirit  was  abroad,  offering  on 
the  shrines  of  Mammon." 

As  Abel  lifted  up  the  second  big  book  he 
groaned.  He  was  very  tired  and  it  seemed  to 
him  it  weighed  as  much  as  half  a  dozen  other 
books.  He  glanced  at  the  number  of  pages  - 
seven  hundred  and  thirty-eight!  The  title  was 
"The  New  Pacific,"  by  Hubert  Howe  Ban- 
croft. It  contained  no  pictures  and  only  one 
map.  In  this  map  the  Pacific  Ocean  held  the 
place  of  honor;  indeed,  it  appeared  to  be  the 
real  picture,  the  land  simply  acting  as  a  sort  of 
framework  for  it.  Abel's  eyes  quickly  caught 
the  words :  "Los  Angeles,"  in  large  black  type  — 
evidently  its  fortunes  were  linked  with  those  of 
the  great  Pacific  Ocean.  Almost  directly  op- 


9o  ABELARD   AND    HELOISE 

posite  it,  across  the  Pacific,  he  saw  the  word 
"Pekin."  One  city  belonged  to  the  newest 
civilization  of  the  times,  the  other  was  the  cap- 
ital of  the  oldest.  What  effect  was  the  one  to 
have  on  the  other  ? 

Abel  paused  for  a  moment  to  consider,  but 
his  precious  time  was  passing  and  he  hurried 
on.  He  looked  over  the  table  of  contents  and 
it  suggested  to  him  that  the  war  with  Spain  had 
somehow  given  the  United  States  a  new  feeling 
in  regard  to  the  Pacific,  but  there  was  no  preface 
by  which  he  could  arrive  at  a  short  cut  as  to 
what  was  the  nature  of  this  new  feeling.  He 
must  therefore  glance  more  or  less  over  the 
pages  of  this  big  book  in  order  to  find  out.  Oh, 
if  Heloise  had  only  put  in  some  of  her  dainty 
marks  to  give  him  a  clue!  But  although  he  had 
again  and  again  turned  the  leaves  he  had  failed 
to  find  so  much  as  a  tiny  cross  or  dot.  With 
rapid  glance  he  absorbed  the  first  eight  pages, 
perceiving  the  book  to  be  as  full  of  information 
as  an  egg  is  of  meat.  When  he  reached  the 
ninth  and  read  a  few  lines  he  set  it  down  with  a 
laugh,  saying  to  himself,  "  Ah !  How  to  obtain 
commercial  supremacy!  that  is  its  sum  and 
substance." 

The  lines  which  caused  Abel  to  lay  the  book 
down  were  innocent  enough;  only  they  were  out 
of  his  field  of  vision.  They  had  to  do  with  the 


THE    SONG    OF    THE    WEST  99 

material  prosperity  of  the  race,  whereas  he  was 
always  thinking  of  its  spiritual  welfare. 

"Nearly  one-half  the  human  race  live  in  countries 
bordering  on  the  Pacific  Ocean;  the  number  will  soon 
be  more  than  one-half.  What  does  that  mean  for  the 
United  States  ?  One-half  the  inhabitants  of  the  earth 
within  quick  and  easy  reach  from  our  western  coast! 
Cheap,  safe,  comfortable,  and  rapid  transit,  as  we 
have  seen,  may  now  be  had  from  every  part  to  every 
part  of  the  Pacific  islands  and  mainland,  and  from 
the  borders  inland  facilities  are  daily  increasing.  If 
Americans  will  rise  to  the  situation,  and  put  forth 
their  intelligence,  energy  and  enterprise,  they  can  feel 
assured  of  an  industrial  conquest  such  as  has  never 
before  been  seen." 

It  was  the  old  story  over  again,  thought  Abel. 
Conquest  rather  than  enlightened  co-operation 
was  to  be  the  aim  of  this  new  world,  as  it  had 
been  of  the  old;  and  subjection,  if  not  a  new 
type  of  slavery,  was  as  ever  to  be  the  fate  of  the 
mass  of  the  people,  in  spite  of  public  schools, 
colleges,  newspapers,  and  an  army  of  preachers! 

"  Verily  the  Millennium  is  still  a  long  way 
off,"  he  sighed. 

The  books  and  pamphlets  on  Los  Angeles 
now  received  Abel's  attention.  In  these  he 
hoped  to  trace  the  true  motive  of  Heloise's 
choice  of  the  "City  of  the  Angels." 

Abel  was  pained  to  see  that  in  some  of  the 
smaller  books  commercialism  was  as  rampant, 


IOO  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

as  evidently  the  central  theme,  and  the  keynote 
of  their  teachings,  as  was  the  case  with  other 
books  on  California  that  he  had  seen.  Works 
of  this  kind  did  not  detain  him  long,  and  as  he 
could  discover  no  marks  from  the  hand  of 
Heloise,  he  turned  to  the  pamphlets.  He 
picked  up  the  largest  one  first,  and  found  that 
what  he  had  supposed  to  be  a  pamphlet  of  ab- 
normal size  was  a  New  Year's  number  of  a  Los 
Angeles  newspaper.  The  cover  was  decorated 
with  a  rural  scene,  in  the  foreground  of  which 
was  a  fine  specimen  of  stalwart  manhood  in 
picturesque  attire.  On  one  shoulder  he  carried 
with  easy  grace  a  long-handled  shovel  and  a 
hoe.  In  his  right  hand  was  a  canteen  of  water, 
doubtless  just  filled  from  the  irrigating  stream 
he  was  leaving  behind  him.  In  the  background 
were  birds  and  flowers,  fields  and  trees,  and 
sunny  skies. 

Turning  over  the  leaf,  Abel  perceived  a  rose- 
crowned  woman  clad  in  flowing  garments. 
She  held  in  her  out-stretched  arms  a  basket 
laden  with  fruit — grapes,  bananas,  peaches,  and 
pears.  On  one  side  of  her  in  the  foreground 
reposed  an  artistically  arranged  heap  of  vege- 
tables. In  the  background  was  a  barrel.  The 
frame  of  the  picture  was  studded,  not  with 
diamonds  and  precious  stones,  but  with  long 
bearded  heads  of  wheat,  while  underneath  was 
written  "Abundance." 


THE    SONG    OF    THE    WEST  IOI 

This  picture  occupied  the  upper  half  of  the 
first  page.  On  the  lower  was  a  poem  entitled 
"In  the  Land  of  the  Sun."  Abel  was  sure 
Heloise  had  read  this  poem,  because  in  one 
stanza  the  word  "  Empire"  had  been  crossed  out 
and  the  word  "Freedom  "substituted  in  her  easy, 
graceful  handwriting.  It  originally  stood  thus: 

"Oh,  it  is  near,  so  near, 
The  wondrous  Future  of  this  land  of  ours, 
And  Empire-shod,  and  promise-crowned  I  see 
No  shadow  darken  its  grand  destiny." 

Heloise's  correction  was  in  Abel's  eyes  a  great 
improvement,  and  he  re-read  the  last  two  lines, 
aloud,  substituting  the  word  "Freedom"  for 
"Empire." 

Turning  the  leaf,  he  glanced  at  the  article 
entitled  "The  Pleiades  of  the  Republic,"  having 
reference  to  the  seven  southern  counties  of 
California.  It  was  written  in  a  very  laudatory 
manner,  and  possibly  it  was  all  true,  but  Abel 
was  less  interested  in  the  seven  Pleiades  of  the 
Republic  than  in  the  probably  uncountable  likes 
and  dislikes  of  one  woman,  so  he  contented  him- 
self with  reading  the  portions  that  were  distin- 
guished from  the  rest  by  pencil  strokes,  or  in 
which  the  word  "home"  was  underlined. 

"The  very  foundation  of  American  civilization  is 
the  home,  and  here,  under  the  sunniest  of  skies,  in  the 
most  balmy  of  airs  and  under  the  most  pleasurable 


102  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

conditions  throughout,  an  intelligent,  care-taking  and 
industrious  people  have  built  homes  that  are  charac- 
teristic alike  of  the  spirit  of  culture  in  our  midst  and  of 
the  beautiful  country  in  which  they  are  planted.  ..." 

"There's  newspaper  English  for  you!"  said 
Abel. 

"In  these  pages  may  be  seen  pictured  bits  of  desert 
which  have  been  transformed  from  forbidding  wastes, 
through  the  touch  of  labor,  into  beautiful  orchards, 
smiling  with  voluptuous  beauty;  odorous  gardens  that 
spill  fragrance  as  from  a  chalice,  and  homes  in  which 
civilization  is  seen  at  its  very  best.  ..." 

"More  'fine  writing'!"  he  commented. 

"And  all  these  things  have  been  accomplished  by 
the  man  with  the  hoe.  He  has  set  his  implement  of 
labor  at  the  root  of  the  sage  bush  and  the  ragweed, 
and  where  these  vagrants  of  the  fields  once  grew  in 
insouciance  .there  has  sprung  up  the  rose-tree,  the 
flaming  poinsetta,  or  that  beautiful  thing  we  call  the 
orange,  which  bears  its  perfumed  flower  and  its  per- 
fect fruit  on  the  same  branch.  With  his  trusty  im- 
plement, backed  by  brawn  and  the  spirit  of  intelli- 
gence, he  has  led  the  waters  of  the  rivers  away  from 
their  natural  courses  and  spread  them  along  foot-hill 
and  valley  alike,  until  Nature  laughs  in  very  exuber- 
ance and  riots  in  bounteous  fecundity.  He  has  har- 
nessed the  mountain  to  the  dynamo,  and  led  along  a 
slender  thread  of  copper  the  subtle  current  which 
propels  the  trolley-car  and  illuminates  the  home  and 
the  highway  alike.  With  the  same  instrument  of 
husbandry  he  has  terraced  the  foot-hills  and  trans- 


THE    SONG    OF   THE    WEST  103 

formed  them  into  slopes  of  beauty.  He  has  leveled 
the  hill,  and  thereon  builded  for  himself,  the  sweet 
wife  and  the  little  ones,  a  home  in  which  happiness, 
contentment  and  culture  are  in  abundant  evidence; 
and  here  the  man  with  the  hoe  does  his  own  thinking, 
and  that  on  as  lofty  a  plane  as  the  most  exalted  of  his 
countrymen  or  the  nobility  of  any  other  country. 
Such,  then,  is  the  life  of  the  man  with  the  hoe  in  the 
beauteous  region  which  lies  about  this  City  of  the 
Angels." 

Abel  laid  down  the  paper.  He  seemed  to  be 
suffocating.  He  arose  and  threw  open  a  win- 
dow, standing  before  it  in  order  to  inhale  the 
fresh,  cool  breeze.  He  knew  it  was  absurd,  but 
the  truth  is  —  he  was  jealous  —  jealous  of  the 
man  with  the  hoe!  He  was  not  aware  that 
Heloise  knew  any  man  of  the  description  just 
given,  but  she  would  meet  him  and  she  would 
fall  in  love  with  him.  Already  the  man  with  the 
hoe  was  the  man  of  her  dreams!  And  she  had 
taken  this  long  trip  to  meet  him  and  she  would 
marry  him,  in  that  free  and  easy  California 
way,  and  share  his  home,  bear  his  children  — 
and  be  forever  lost  to  her  rightful  lover.  Abel 
began  to  pace  the  floor,  tortured  by  the  cruel, 
subtle,  unreasoning  and  unreasonable  monster. 

How  little  it  takes  to  make  even  a  good  man 
jealous! 


CHAPTER  VIII 
"HOME,  SWEET  HOME" 


"SHE  (the  Western  woman]  calls  her  house  'home' 
oftener  than  is  done  in  the  East,  and  these  homes  be- 
speak the  finer  taste  of  the  woman.  Her  education  is 
likely  to  be  more  virile  than  that  of  her  Eastern  sisters, 
because  it  is  acquired  at  schools  and  colleges  where 
co-education  of  the  sexes  is  the  rule.  Her  domination 
in  the  home  and  her  primacy  in  the  higher  life,  as  we 
are  inclined  to  call  it,  are  seen  not  only  in  the  more 
obvious  social  affairs,  but  in  the  element  of  seriousness 
which  marks  most  life  in  this  midway  of  the  country." 
—  Henry  Loomis  Nelson. 


.&^3»»esj^^ 


VIII 


Home,  Sweet  Home*' 


PRESENTLY  Abel  reseated  himself,  deter- 
mined to  see  what  else  this  abnormally 
large  newspaper  had  to  relate  about  the  man  with 
the  hoe.  He  found  no  tell-tale  pencil  marks 
either  on  the  remainder  of  page  two  or  on  three. 
He  turned  the  leaf  and  saw  that  the  next  two 
pages  were  profusely  illustrated,  but,  thank 
heaven,  there  was  no  man  with  the  hoe!  On 
the  top  of  page  four  he  read,  "A  Life  in  the 
Open  Air,"  and  the  pictures  without  exception 
had  to  do  with  people  having  a  fine  time  out  of 
doors.  Some  were  happy  in  fields,  others  were 
having  "Fun  in  the  Pacific,"  merrily  disporting 
in  the  arms  of  the  biggest  ocean  of  the  globe. 
On  page  five  was  "A  Christmas  Party  in  South- 
ern California,"  enjoying  themselves  outside 
their  house  instead  of  inside,  as  would  have 
been  the  case  on  the  Atlantic  coast.  The  last 
picture  represented  "A  Rose-Geranium  in 
January,"  which  was  literally  covered  with 
blossoms  and  extended  from  the  bottom  of  a 
pretty  cottage  to  the  very  roof,  partly  embracing 
a  dormer  window  it  had  found  there,  besides 
luxuriously  surrounding  the  large  one  below. 

107 


IO8  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

A  gentleman  was  seated  at  his  ease  outside  of 
the  cottage,  quite  near  the  ambitious  gera- 
nium. A  lady  decorated  with  flowers  was  hand- 
ing the  man,  presumably  her  husband,  a  small 
bouquet. 

"  It  looks  as  if  it  were  the  custom  of  the  coun- 
try to  avoid, the  inside  of  one's  house,"  com- 
mented Abel  to  himself.  The  next  moment  he 
perceived  a  faint  line  and  saw  the  word  "home  " 
in  two  places,  underlined  as  usual.  He  read: 

"A  country  borne  in  Southern  California,  under 
judicious  management,  may  not  only  be  made  a  thing 
of  beauty  and  a  joy  forever,  but  may  also  be  made  to 
yield  its  owner  a  good  income.  .  .  .  Besides  all  these 
attractions  and  advantages  Southern  California  is  a 
land  of  culture  and  refinement;  of  schools,  churches, 
and  libraries;  of  artistic  and  musical  and  scientific 
associations  and  of  refined  homes,  so  that  the  intelli- 
gent and  educated  stranger  who  comes  to  cast  his  lot 
with  the  people  of  this  favored  land  need  not  fear  but 
that  he  and  his  family  may  enjoy  all  the  advantages  of 
the  advanced  civilization  and  social  life  to  which  they 
have  been  accustomed." 

The  two  pages  which  followed  were  even 
more  profusely  illustrated.  Abel  gave  special 
attention  to  the  first  picture,  which  represented  a 
tall  woman  in  flowing  garments  and  with 
outstretched  wings,  decorated  with  roses  and 
other  flowers.  Her  gaze  seemed  to  be  pene- 
trating the  future  and  her  outstretched  arms 


"HOME,  SWEET  HOME"  109 

to  be  welcoming  it.  Abel  thought  that  if  the 
artist  had  seen  the  face  of  Heloise  he  could 
easily  have  made  the  countenance  of  the  woman 
more  angelic;  still  the  picture  was  poetically 
conceived  and  it  pleased  him.  Only  one  small 
portion  of  the  article,  "The  City  of  the  Angels," 
had  received  any  notice  apparently  at  the  hands 
of  Heloise,  though  doubtless  it  had  all  been 
carefully  read  by  this  indefatigable  young 
woman:  the  word  "homes"  had,  of  course,  a 
little  line  underneath. 

"After  all  is  said,  the  chief  attraction  which  Los 
Angeles  presents  to  our  Eastern  visitors  is  found  in 
the  beautiful  homes  that  extend  for  mile  after  mile 
through  the  residential  sections  of  the  city." 

"Ah,  more  women,"  said  Abel,  as  he  pro- 
ceeded to  examine  the  picture  on  the  top  of  page 
ten.  "They  are  on  the  outside  of  the  house 
again,"  he  added,  as  he  gave  a  young  woman 
seated  in  a  rustic  settee  his  especial  attention. 

"Surely,  the  climate  must  be  a  mild  one,"  he 
added,  since  the  robes  were  mostly  without 
sleeves  and  quite  low  at  the  neck,  while  one  of 
the  women  wore  sandals. 

Another  woman  held  a  scroll  in  one  hand  on 
which  Abel  read  the  word  "Philippines."     The 
other  words  he  could   not   make  out.     There 
were  some  lines   radiating  from  one   point  - 
probably  Los  Angeles  —  some  distance  out  in 


IIO  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

the  Pacific  to  little  splotches  —  islands  likely  — 
and  to  the  mainland  on  the  other  side.  Her 
other  hand  was  extended  and  she  appeared  to 
be  pointing  across  a  vast  expanse  of  water  to 
the  setting  sun. 

The  article  below  was  entitled,  "Looking 
Across  the  Sea."  Abel,  as  usual,  read  only  the 
marked  portion; 

"My  five  years'  residence  in  the  Far  East  as  a 
United  States  Minister,  and  my  extensive  travels 
through  all  of  the  principal  Asiatic  lands,  have  con- 
vinced me  that  America's  greatest  undeveloped  com- 
mercial opportunity  is  in  the  Pacific  and  the  lands 
beyond.  If  there  is  any  section  of  the  United  States 
which  will  receive  more  benefits  from  the  develop- 
ment of  Asiatic  trade  than  any  other,  it  is  the  Pacific 
Coast  States.  The  future  of  the  great  common- 
wealths, California,  Oregon  and  Washington,  and  of 
their  near  neighbors,  Arizona,  Nevada,  Idaho  and 
Montana,  is  one  of  vast  promise. 

"We  now  can  see  how  we  shall  develop  in  these 
States  a  prosperity  comparable  to  that  of  the  Eastern 
States.  We  can  see  reasons  why  an  immense  popu- 
lation should  yet  make  the  Far  West  its  home.  .  .  . 

"  I  look  forward  to  the  evolution  of  the  ideal  Amer- 
ican in  California.  There,  with  all  the  conditions 
favorable  to  the  fostering  of  the  best  manhood  and  the 
best  citizenship,  this  possibility  should  some  day  come 
true.  The  Americanism  of  the  Coast  is  already  in 
many  respects  ahead  of  that  of  the  Atlantic  States, 
but  in  time  it  will  reach  even  a  much  higher  level  than 


HOME,    SWEET    HOME  III 

is  now  attained.  When  that  day  comes  California 
will  not  only  be  the  Empire  (the  word  '  Empire '  was 
crossed  out  and  the  word  'leading'  substituted  in  the 
margin)  state  of  this  nation,  but  an  influence  that  will 
be  felt  throughout  the  entire  world." 

The  rest  of  the  article  was  unmarked.  Abel 
did  not  read  it,  but  as  he  glanced  it  over  he 
could  not  help  seeing  such  expressive  head- 
lines as,  "The  Open  Door  to  the  Orient,"  "The 
Trans-Siberian  Railway,  and  What  it  Means 
to  the  Pacific  Coast,"  "Southern  California's 
Share  in  the  Prospective  Commerce,"  "The 
Part  California  Must  Play  in  the  Struggle  for 
Supremacy  in  the  Far  East,"  and  "  The  Enter- 
ing Wedge  for  American  Manufacturers." 

Not  perceiving  any  faint  pencil  lines  any- 
where, Abel  paused  only  an  instant  now  and 
then  to  examine  the  exhibits  of  fruits  which 
profusely  illustrated  several  pages.  He  turned 
a  leaf  quite  unsuspectingly,  when  what  should 
he  see  but  the  man  with  the  hoe  again  ?  It  was 
too  much.  He  felt  the  same  spasm  of  jealousy 
which  had  attacked  him  earlier  in  the  evening. 

"It's  nonsense,  I  know,"  he  said  to  himself, 
"but  I  can't  bear  that  man  with  the  hoe!" 

And  fearing  that  Heloise  had  marked  some 
more  laudatory  passages  concerning  this  in- 
dividual, Abel  abruptly  put  the  big  paper  down 
and  took  up  a  small  pamphlet. 

In  it  he  found  some  amusing  and  interesting 


112  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

items  respecting  the  birth  and  development  of 
the  City  of  the  Angels.  It  appeared  that  the 
city  was  founded  because  worn-out  soldiers, 
and  soldiers  whose  term  of  service  had  expired, 
wanted  a  settled  home.  To  supply  this  need, 
there  were  laid  out  thirty  small  fields  near  the 
public  square  by  the  alluvial  bottom  land  of  the 
river,  so  that  irrigation  could  supplement  rain 
in  providing  moisture  for  their  crops.  Each 
head  of  the  family  was  allowed  a  hoe  — 

At  this  point  Abel  nearly  dropped  the  pam- 
phlet. 

"  So  the  bona  fide  inhabitants  of  Los  Angeles 
have  for  their  progenitor  the  man  with  the  hoe," 
he  muttered. 

Then,  conquering  his  disgust  —  or  jealousy 
-  he  read  how  these  men  with  their  hoes  cele- 
brated the  founding  of  their  new-born  city  in 
the  California  wilderness.  The  good  fathers 
of  the  mission,  as  well  as  Don  Felipe,  with  his 
showy  guard  of  soldiers,  were  present.  Natu- 
rally "the  priests  and  neophytes  chanted.  .  .  . 
The  cross  was  set,  the  flag  of  Spain  and  the  ban- 
ner of  Our  Queen  of  the  Angels  were  unfurjed 
and  the  new  town  marked  out  around  a  square 
a  little  to  the  north  of  the  present  Plaza.  .  .  . 
The  soldiers  named  their  home  Nuestra  Reina 
de  Los  Angeles,"  a  name  as  long  as  the  times 
were  slow-paced. 

Abel  was  amused  to  learn  that  the  Angelinos 


"HOME,  SWEET  HOME"  113 

did  not  think  it  necessary  to  build  in  an  elabo- 
rate manner — probably  on  account  of  the  ex- 
cellence of  the  climate.  They  reared  simple 
adobe  huts,  in  which  they  left  an  open  place  for 
entrance  and  exit  and  inserted  some  panes  of 
glass.  Their  church  was  equally  guiltless  of 
complexity  and  ornamentation  and  contained 
no  such  luxuries  as  seats.  Everyone  knelt  during 
the  devotional  exercises,  when  not  standing, 
and  the  women  being  attired  in  bright  colors, 
the  scene  reminded  the  onlooker  of  a  garden 
gorgeous  with  dahlias  and  tulips. 

But  evolution  made  discord  in  the  City  of  the 
Angels,  as  it  has  done  in  every  terrestrial  para- 
dise, from  the  Garden  of  Eden  up  to  date. 
Though  the  Angelinos  were  naturally  devout 
and  confessed  their  sins  and  underwent  their 
penances  with  the  docility  and  simplicity  of 
children,  the  Church,  desiring  a  more  strenuous 
type  of  piety,  proceeded  to  plant  in  this  new 
paradise  a  forbidden  tree,  and  issued  an  edict 
to  the  effect  that  these  simple  children  of  nature 
should  not  dance  their  favorite  escandalosissima 
dance,  and  that  whoever  refused  to  obey  should 
be  excommunicated.  Then  did  these  new 
Adams  and  Eves  prove  no  more  obedient  than 
the  first  couple,  for  history  affirms  they  danced 
the  escandalosissima  just  the  same. 

When  Abel  came  to  the  part  relating  to  the 
many  wonderful  fights  the  Angelinos  had  made 


114  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

in  desperate  resistance  to  new  political  ideas 
he  began  to  realize  how  very  tired  he  was. 
Presently  his  head  fell  back  on  his  comfortable 
chair  and  he  soon  was  fast  asleep. 

He  dreamed  that  God  had  made  a  brand- 
new  Paradise  and  that  He  had  put  himself,  to- 
gether with  his  beloved  Heloise,  in  it  to  tend 
and  to  keep  it.  And  that  when  Heloise  had 
asked  him,  "Is  it  really  our  own,  and  can  we 
eat  of  every  tree?"  a  Voice  had  replied,  "The 
garden  is  yours.  Eat  freely  of  every  tree  — 
and  if  you  take  good  care  of  your  garden  it  will 
reward  you  abundantly." 

Then  Abel  thought  Heloise  had  turned  to  him 
with  a  pretty  air  of  triumph,  as  she  said : 

"Ah,  Abelard  mio,  did  I  not  tell  you  that  God 
is  a  Generous  God,  that  He  withholds  nothing 
good  from  His  children  ?" 


CHAPTER  IX 

A  STRUGGLE  WITH  LOVE 


"I  WENT  in  search  of  love  and  lost  myself."  — 
Hindu  Proverb. 

"HE  either  fears  his  fate  too  much,  or  his  deserts  are 

small, 

Who  dares  not  put  it  to  the  touch  and  win  or  lose  it 
all." 

"ALL  the  world  loves  a  lover."  —  Emerson. 


IX 


A  Struggle  with  Love 

* 

THE  fiery  glow  of  breaking  day  was  piercing 
the  leaden  gray  sky  when  Abel  awoke. 
With  a  wrench  his  mind  came  back  from  the  land 
of  dreams,  only  to  be  filled  again  with  his  ever- 
present  dilemma.  He  sprang  to  his  feet  and 
began  to  pace  the  floor. 

All  at  once  memory  brought  back  an  occa- 
sion on  which  Heloise  had  casually  mentioned 
a  relative  on  her  mother's  side  who  lived  in 
Northampton,  in  Western  Massachusetts. 
Might  she  have  halted  there  on  her  journey  ? 
What  was  more  natural  than  that  she  should 
stop  there  to  see  her  mother's  sister  once  more 
before  putting  a  continent  between  them  ? 

He  looked  hurriedly  at  a  time-table  and  then 
at  his  watch.  Yes,  there  was  time  to  catch  the 
early  morning  train  for  Northampton.  But, 
supposing  he  did  ?  he  had  no  clue  to  the  where- 
abouts of  Heloise's  aunt! 

A  happy  thought  struck  him.  His  Heloise 
had  been  educated  at  the  woman's  college  in 
that  town;  he  would  stop  there  and  inquire; 
surely  some  one  in  that  institution  would  be  able 
to  put  him  on  the  right  track.  He  hastily 

117 


Il8  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

thrust  a  few  needful  articles  into  a  "grip," 
penned  a  line  to  Mrs.  Fields  in  excuse  of  his 
disappearance,  and  noiselessly  left  the  house. 

Never  had  the  Reverend  Abel  Allen  known 
so  strange  an  existence  as  was  his  during  the 
next  few  hours.  His  early  love  experience  had 
been  intense,  his  suffering  acute,  yet  from  it  he 
could  draw  no  aid  with  which  to  meet  his  present 
plight.  He  had  then  been  free  to  love  the 
maiden  of  his  choice;  nothing  had  parted  them 
except  the  girl's  own  unworthiness  —  her  vapid 
mind  and  vacillating  will.  But  here  was  a 
woman  of  mind,  of  soul,  of  charm,  with  a  power 
that  drew  him  to  her  with  hooks  of  steel.  She 
was  in  every  way  worthy  of  his  deepest  devotion, 
his  highest  faith,  yet  to  love  her  was  a  sin  against 
all  he  had  hitherto  proclaimed  and  mainly 
believed;  and  to  marry  her  —  after  her  ad- 
mitted infidelity  —  would  be  a  spiritual  and  a 
social  abomination,  a  crime  in  the  eyes  of  his 
congregation. 

Reason  told  him  that  his  quest  was  in  vain, 
that  even  should  he  find  her  and  pour  out  his 
soul  at  her  feet,  as  man  never  had  before,  she 
would  refuse  him.  Yet  he  would  try!  Only 
the  flitting,  fitful  ghost  of  a  hope  visited  him 
intermittently  as  the  train  bore  him  on. 

He  asked  himself — "But  supposing  there 
is  a  chance  that  I  could  persuade  her,  and  that 
we  should  marry  in  the  face  of  all  —  what  then  ? 


A   STRUGGLE    WITH    LOVE  IIQ 

Heloise  will  never  capitulate  to  popular  opinion, 
she  will  not  play  a  part  that  would  be  a  daily 
lie  —  she  will  not  even  parley  a  point  where 
truth  is  at  stake.  And  I  as  figure-head  in  this 
situation!  What  is  left  me  to  do?  Resign 
from  the  ministry  of  an  Orthodox  pulpit.  Noth- 
ing else." 

At  this  point  a  groan  escaped  Abel,  for  he 
thought  of  his  empty  exchequer  and  the  plain 
but  pertinent  information  he  had  obtained  from 
Heloise's  landlady  as  to  the  limited  supply  of 
that  young  lady's  personal  funds.  Where 
could  he  obtain  another  pulpit  ?  He  realized, 
of  course,  that  with  his  well-earned  reputation 
as  a  preacher,  certain  "liberal"  pulpits  would 
be  open  to  him;  but  with  the  inevitable  commo- 
tion which  his  resignation  would  arouse,  and 
the  consequent  reprisals  that  would  surely  follow 
an  open  avowal  of  facts,  he  could  not  feel  at  all 
sure  of  how  long  even  the  means  of  livelihood 
might  be  withheld  from  him.  His  sensitive 
temperament  shrank  from  the  notoriety  that 
inevitably  follows  such  a  severance  from  time- 
approved  moorings;  his  vivid  imagination  pic- 
tured the  petty  malice,  the  skulking  lie  that  pur- 
sues its  devious  course  unseen  until  it  blossoms 
into  open  scandal,  whose  roots  draw  sustenance 
from  one  knows  not  where. 

Into  what  a  vortex  was  he  about  to  draw  the 
woman  he  adored!  And  yet,  the  blind,  pro- 


I2O  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

pelling  force  of  destiny  drew  Abel  on  to  his 
coveted  goal.  He  could  not  now  escape  it  if  he 
would,  and  would  not  if  he  could. 

It  is  needless  to  relate  each  detail  of  his  ar- 
rival at  Northampton,  his  quest  at  its  seat  of 
learning,  the  baffling  value  of  the  clew  he  held 
-  when  even  the  name  of  the  aunt  of  Heloise 
had  escaped  his  memory  —  and  at  last  his 
chance  encounter  with  one  who  had  been  a 
teacher  of  Heloise,  and  whose  timely  agency 
enabled  him  to  find  his  way  to  her. 

The  guiding  instinct  that  had  surmounted 
reason  and  had  led  Abel  on  from  the  moment 
of  his  awakening  from  restless  sleep,  had  not 
mocked  him.  The  home  he  sought  and  found 
was  a  simple,  cozy  cottage,  set  within  an  old 
garden  where  old-fashioned  New  England 
flowers  ran  riot.  The  front  door  was  open,  and 
as  Abel's  figure  filled  the  entrance,  and  while 
his  hand  was  lifted  to  pull  the  bell,  the  open 
door  of  a  distant  room  revealed  to  him  a  glimpse 
of  Heloise  seated  at  the  dining-table.  Her  hat 

O 

and  traveling  jacket  lay  on  a  chair  beside  her. 
The  hour  was  high  noon.  Instinctively  Abel 
knew  that  she  had  merely  halted  there  over 
night  and  was  taking  a  hasty  meal  before  catch- 
ing the  onward  train  to  the  West. 

As  his  shadow  darkened  the  doorway,  Hel- 
oise looked  up,  and  with  an  exclamation  of 
mingled  surprise  and  dismay  sprang  to  her  feet. 


A    STRUGGLE    WITH    LOVE  121 

He  advanced  toward  her,  the  courage  of  de- 
spair upon  him. 

"Your  Abelard  is  here  to  claim  you!"  he 
cried. 

He  had  come  there  without  thought  of  how 
he  was  to  greet  her  and  almost  without  hope  of 
finding  her,  but  had  he  planned  his  words  hours 
in  advance,  he  could  not  have  said  anything 
that  would  more  quickly  have  made  her  mis- 
tress of  herself.  In  a  moment  she  had  regained 
her  old-time,  easy,  gracious,  simple  poise. 

"Aunt  Emily,"  she  said,  "this  is  the  Reverend 
Mr.  Allen,  the  pastor  and  dear  friend  of  my 
father.  Mr.  Allen,  this  is  Mrs.  Norris,  my 
nearest  living  relative." 

Luckily  for  Abel,  Mrs.  Norris  was  one  of 
those  motherly  women  with  a  "born  knack" 
for  making  men  comfortable.  In  a  moment, 
she  had  taken  the  honors  of  entertaining  out  of 
Heloise's  hands,  and  Abel,  almost  without  voli- 
tion on  his  part,  found  himself  seated  at  table 
opposite  to  his  adored  one,  while  the  mistress 
of  the  house  pressed  both  to  do  justice  to  what 
was  placed  before  them. 

Abel  was  deadly  pale,  but  his  pallor  scarcely 
exceeded  that  of  Heloise  during  the  first  moment 
of  their  meeting.  As  Mrs.  Norris's  shrewd 
eyes  traveled  rapidly  from  one  countenance  to 
another,  she  took  in  the  situation  at  a  glance, 
and  her  efforts  to  restore  balance  proved  both 


122  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

timely  and  effective.  As  soon  as  propriety 
would  allow,  she  excused  herself,  "in  order  to 
consult  a  market-man  at  the  back  door,"  she 
claimed,  and  Abel  and  his  beloved  were  left 
alone. 

Abel  lost  no  time  in  coming  to  the  charge. 

"I  know  I  am  doing  an  unusual  thing,"  he 
began  -  "  an  unprecedented  thing  for  one  in 
my  position  —  but  do  it  I  must.  I  can  think  of 
nothing  but  you;  your  image  comes  between  me 
and  my  work;  it  has  grown  to  be  an  obsession 
which  I  must  grapple  with,  conquer,  and  reduce 
to  a  tangible  reality,  or  it  will  make  life  worthless 
and  my  mission  a  failure." 

Heloise  had  summoned  all  her  strength  to 
meet  the  inevitable.  She  looked  at  him  with 
an  indulgent  smile  while  he  spoke. 

"You  have  lost  your  head,  my  Abelard. 
What  is  your  mission  —  to  preach  the  Gospel 
of  Christ  crucified  ?"  she  asked. 

He  regarded  her  in  silence. 

"How  could  you  do  that  with  me  by  your 
side,  a  reproach  to  your  convictions,  an  em- 
bodied lie  to  your  utterances?"  she  continued. 

"My  mission  shall  be  henceforth  to  proclaim 
the  truth  as  it  is  revealed  to  me  at  first  hand,  as 
I  see  it  myself,  and  who  can  so  well  aid  me  in 
that  as  you  ?" 

She  studied  his  face  with  shining  eyes,  the 


A    STRUGGLE    WITH    LOVE  123 

blood  that  had  retreated  from  her  cheeks  coming 
slowly  back. 

"  And  your  people,  your  church,  Abel  ?  Above 
all,  your  deacons?"  she  queried. 

Her  cool  questioning  helped  to  restore  calm 
to  his  overwrought  nerves. 

"I  think  I  can  withdraw  myself  from  the 
deacons  without  any  great  wrench  of  soul,"  he 
said,  while  a  smile  flitted  over  his  pale  lips  and 
lighted  momentarily  his  weary  eyes. 

"Do  you  really  mean  you  will  give  up  the 
ministry  ?"  she  asked. 

"Of  an  orthodox  church,  yes." 

"And  then?" 

"God  knows!  Some  more  liberal  pulpit  may 
open  its  door  to  me." 

The  surprise,  the  expectancy,  faded  from  her 
face.  He  was  not  slow  to  perceive  the  change 
and  hastened  to  add: 

"It  shall  be  wholly  as  you  say,  Heloise.  I 
have  won  your  love,  you  have  confessed  it.  I 
know  not  how  nor  why  it  should  be  so  —  for 
I  feel  my  unworthiness  —  but  it  is  my  crown 
of  glory  that  it  is  so.  Your  love  has  already 
revealed  a  new  world  to  me,  a  world  of  larger 
spiritual  scope  and  meaning.  Your  father's 
deathbed  confession  burst  the  shell  of  dogma 
within  which  I  had  so  long  striven  to  confine 
myself,  and  other  revelations  followed.  Your 
silent  confession,  my  proposal,  your  refusal,  my 


124  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

search  for  you,  my  sleepless  night  of  agony 
when  I  found  you  had  escaped  me,  the  inspira- 
tion which  led  me  on  till  I  found  you  here,  all 
mean  but  one  thing  —  that  Providence  is  draw- 
ing us  to  each  other!  We  are  meant  to  work 
out  our  destinies  hand  in  hand.  You  must  not 
travel  westward,  away  from  me,  alone;  you  must 
marry  me  here  and  now!" 

A  pained  smile  disturbed  Heloise's  beautiful 
lips.  "And  return  with  you  to  face  your  congre- 
gation as  your  bride?"  she  said  almost  in- 
audibly,  her  eyes  piercing  into  his. 

Abel  winced.  "No,"  he  said  slowly,  "I 
would  not  counsel  your  doing  that.  I  only  urge 
that  you  marry  me  at  once  —  to  prevent  your 
putting  a  continent  between  us.  You  could  re- 
main with  your  aunt  while  I  return  to-day  and 
tender  my  resignation  - 

"And  then,  myAbelard?" 

"Then,  my  Heloise,  the  world  is  wide  for  you 
and  me." 

"Why  not  add  the  old  saw --'the  world  is 
well  lost  for  love." 

"That  goes  without  saying." 

"Not  with  me.  There  are  things  of  smaller 
bulk  than  the  world  which  a  right-minded 
woman  ought  not  to  give  up,  even  for  love." 

"Name  one!" 

"A  principle!  Have  you  forgotten  our  talks 
together  on  the  equality  of  marriage  for  man 


A   STRUGGLE    WITH    LOVE  125 

and  woman  ?  I  could  not  promise  to  be  your 
wife  without  promising  to  be  your  vassal." 

An  agonized  gasp  involuntarily  escaped  Abel. 

"  For  God's  sake,  Heloise,  do  not  drag  in  the 
question  of  vassalage  between  you  and  me! 
What  are  words  spoken,  what  are  promises  made 
-  it  is  the  intention,  the  faith,  the  love  - 

"Ah,  yes,  I  know,"  she  sighed,  "women 
have  promised  with  their  lips  while  making 
reservations  in  their  hearts;  that  is  the  old 
devious  way,  the  only  way  by  which  woman 
ever  gained  an  inch  of  power;  the  miserable 
custom  that  has  forced  all  the  clever  women  of 
history  and  story  to  assume  the  guise  of  in- 
trigantes, trickstresses !  What  is  the  good  of 
modern  enlightenment  and  of  the  concessions 
that  woman  herself  has  wrung  from  man,  if  she 
is  no  better  able  now  than  of  yore  to  stand 
squarely  on  her  own  feet  and  suffer  and  be 
strong  without  paltry  compromise?" 

Abel  threw  out  his  hands  towards  her  im- 
ploringly. "All  that  is  nothing  between  you 
and  me,  Heloise;  all  reasoning  is  but  as  the  idle 
wind,  in  the  face  of  a  love  that  neither  time  nor 
eternity  can  blot  out!" 

"Ah,  my  Abelard,"  spoke  the  woman,  in 
tones  of  deepest  tenderness,  "  the  faith  in  head- 
long passion  has  been  depended  upon  from 
time  immemorial,  and  failed ;  its  strains  have  been 
sung  and  drawn  tears  and  tremors  from  men 


126  ABELARD   AND    HELOISE 

and  women  who  even  while  they  wept  knew 
themselves  incapable  of  making  the  one  great 
sacrifice  for  love  such  as  I  make  now  —  for 
though  I  renounce,  I  love  you  with  my  whole 
soul,  Abelard!" 

He  sprang  to  his  feet  and  almost  leaped 
towards  her.  But  she  was  equally  quick  in  her 
movements  and  had  the  table  between  them  in 
a  trice.  With  one  hand  turned  palm  outward 
towards  him,  she  leaned  the  other  on  the  table 
while  she  spoke. 

"Listen,  Abel,  while  I  tell  you  a  little  story. 
In  the  eyes  of  men  generally  I  know  it  would 
tell  against  my  attractiveness  as  a  woman  - 
perhaps  it  may  in  yours.  However,  it  will  illus- 
trate the  fact  that  to  stand  alone  for  a  principle 
was  strong  in  me  even  before  my  womanhood. 

"  It  was  in  my  school  days.  I  was  very  young 
when  the  'star  young  man'  of  the  village,  as  he 
was  called,  was  good  enough  to  show  a  prefer- 
ence for  me  above  the  other  girls.  I  was  not 
above  feeling  flattered.  How  could  I  be,  how 
could  any  girl  ?  He  was  rich,  attractive, 
sought  after.  But  he  had  a  most  evil  reputa- 
tion where  women  were  concerned.  The  mo- 
ment his  preference  for  me  became  known  I 
went  up  several  points  in  the  estimation  of  the 
whole  school  —  even  while  teachers  and  pupils 
alike  threw  out  cautious  hints  against  his  wiles. 
My  decision  was  quickly  made;  I  froze  him  — 


A   STRUGGLE    WITH    LOVE  127 

even  while  longing  for  the  prestige  his  atten- 
tions would  have  lent  me,  and  feeling  perfectly 
secure  of  my  own  strength  against  his  blandish- 
ments. When  forced  to  explain  to  my  friends 
that  I  did  this  in  support  of  a  principle  and  in 
the  interest  of  all  women  against  all  men  of  his 
sort,  I  became  the  butt  of  the  school!  I  was 
pointed  to  as  the  female  Quixote  who  had  be- 
gun a  lone  tilt  against  the  village  Apollo  —  the 
sun  god  who  drew  all  eyes  in  his  direction. 
Well,  the  girl  who  laughed  most  at  the  futility 
of  my  lone  stand  against  current  social  tactics 
ended  —  after  much  humiliation  to  herself  — 
in  marrying  that  man  and  lived  for  a  time  in  a 
matrimonial  hell,  from  which  the  law  finally 
released  her.  She  is  a  hopelessly  cynical 
woman  to-day. 

"The  point  I  wish  to  maintain  in  telling  this 
story  is  that  had  those  girls  combined  the 
result  would  have  been  the  utter  defeat  of  that 
man's  prestige.  Men  are  fond  of  telling  women 
that  they  do  not  know  their  power,  that  if  they 
did  men  would  be  helpless  before  them.  Ah, 
how  true  that  is,  though  in  another  way  than 
men  intend  it!  Every  disadvantage  that  woman 
suffers  from  is  due  to  her  own  lack  of  courage, 
her  own  lack  of  combination,  her  own  lack  of  her- 
oism to  stand  alone  for  the  right,  if  need  be. 
I  may  have  to  deny  myself  the  happiness  of  liv- 
ing in  the  daily  light  of  your  love  during  my 


128  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

natural  life,  Abel,  but  if  the  burden  be  mine, 
God  willing,  I  will  endure  it,  rather  than  strike 
colors  before  a  principle.  On  that  point,  Abel, 
the  experience  of  my  parents  has  wonderfully 
deepened  my  convictions." 

"  Heloise,  in  our  case  you  are  fighting  a  phan- 
tom —  wearing  yourself  out  on  a  shadow." 

"No,  Abel,  it  is  a  substance.  Time  will 
prove  it.  Go  back,  my  love,  to  your  work. 
Close  your  soul's  doors  on  the  creed  you  have 
outgrown;  treat  it  as  you  would  an  old  garment, 
good  only  for  those  whom  it  still  fits.  Follow 
the  kindly  light  that  has  dawned  upon  you. 
Preach  the  new  Gospel.  Do  your  work,  leav- 
ing unto  God  the  rest.  I,  too,  will  do  mine. 
If  in  due  time,  and  the  fulfilment  of  the  social 
evolution  now  pending,  we  can  come  together 
in  a  marriage  honorable  to  us  both,  our  lives 
will  be  the  richer  for  the  temporary  denial." 

Abel  stood  mute,  subdued,  pale  and  worn. 
Mechanically  he  held  out  his  open  arms,  while 
his  lips  framed  rather  than  articulated  the 
words : 

"Once  more?" 

"A  benediction  till  a  happier  meeting,"  mur- 
mured she,  and  gliding  forward  she  put  her 
hands  upon  his  shoulders  and  her  lips  to  his 
forehead. 

In  vain  she  tried  to  release  herself  a  moment 
later.  Like  in  a  vise  was  she  held  to  his  heart, 


A    STRUGGLE    WITH    LOVE 

her  face  buried  on  his  shoulder  to  avoid  the 
kisses  which  he  lavished  on  her  fair  neck. 

The  woman  grew  dizzy  and  weak  under  the 
power  of  the  emotion  she  had  evoked.  What 
the  result  might  have  been  she  never  dared 
afterwards  to  assert,  even  to  herself. 

Both  were  saved  from  the  fate  common  to 
lovers  in  their  plight  by  the  reappearance  of 
Mrs.  Norris.  That  shrewd  dame  made  no 
little  noise  in  her  approach. 

"If  you  want  to  catch  your  train  you  have 
scarce  five  minutes  to  the  good!"  she  called  out, 
even  before  pushing  open  the  door. 

When  she  entered,  the  two  stood  apart,  fac- 
ing her  with  the  air  of  self-confessed  culprits, 
while  she,  good  woman,  bore  in  her  countenance 
every  mark  of  a  lively  disposition  to  shrive  them 
then  and  there,  and  the  desire  besides  to  do  all 
in  her  power  to  spare  them  from  future  ruth- 
lessness  towards  themselves. 

"Hope  you  have  brought  her  to  her  senses 
and  she  has  given  up  going  ?"  she  said,  turning 
to  Abel. 

Heloise  was  the  first  to  recover  herself. 

"No,"  she  said,  "we  both  know  that  it  is  best 
for  me  to  go." 

And  before  either  Abel  or  her  aunt  could  pro- 
test, she  had  donned  hat  and  coat  and  was  mov- 
ing to  the  door,  suit-case  in  hand. 

"Aunt  Emily,"  she   said,  her   hand   on  the 


130  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

door-knob,  "I  never  could  bear  to  be  escorted 
to  a  train;  in  this  case  I  emphatically  protest 
against  either  you  or  Mr.  Allen  going  a  foot  out 
of  the  house  to  accompany  me.  I  cannot  stand 
it!  Surely  you  do  not  want  to  see  me  break 
down.  Make  Mr.  Allen  stay  awhile  —  help 
him,  he  has  been  ill  —  it  will  take  your  mind  off 
my  going.  God  bless  you  both!" 

In  the  course  of  the  next  few  hours,  Mrs. 
Norris  discovered  that  she  did  indeed  need  to 
minister  to  Abel.  She  believed  him  to  be  a 
dangerously  sick  man  and  told  him  so.  But 
despite  all  her  warnings  she  was  unable  to  de- 
tain him  more  than  a  few  hours.  Late  in  the 
afternoon  he  took  the  train  homeward  and 
reached  his  own  quarters  in  the  friendly  dark- 
ness of  the  night.  Once  ensconced  there,  he 
relaxed  the  strain  on  his  nervous  strength  that 
had  enabled  him  to  gain  its  shelter,  and  lost  all 
consciousness  of  time  and  place. 


CHAPTER  X 
MARY  AND  MARTHA 


"ASTRAY,  full  of  doubts,  he  nevertheless,  in  his 
horror  of  violence,  made  common  cause  with  old 
society,  now  reduced  to  defend  itself;  unable  though 
he  was  to  say  whence  would  come  the  new  Messiah  of 
Gentleness,  in  whose  hands  he  would  have  liked  to 
place  poor  ailing  mankind."  —  Zola. 


X 


Mary  and  Martha 


POOR,  worn-out  Abel!  He  slept  late  the 
next  morning;  and  so  heavily  that  the  maid 
who  brought  him  his  breakfast  failed  to  awaken 
him  when  she  lightly  knocked  on  his  door. 
As  it  was  slightly  ajar,  she  pushed  it  open  in 
order  to  place  the  heavy  tray  on  a  stand  near 
the  big  armchair  in  which  Abel  was  seated, 
asleep. 

At  first  Letty  thought  the  minister  had  per- 
haps risen  very  early  to  do  some  extra  reading 
or  writing.  But  she  soon  perceived  that  he  had 
not  been  to  bed  and  that  he  was  not  sleeping 
lightly  but  soundly.  Fearing  that  he  might  be 
ill,  she  quickly  returned  to  her  mistress,  who 
with  her  husband  was  eating  her  morning  meal. 

"What  is  it,  Letty  ?"  asked  Mrs.  Fields,  per- 
ceiving that  something  was  amiss. 

"Why,  the  dear  minister  looks  as  if  he  were 
not  long  for  this  world !  He  is  fast  asleep  in  his 
chair,  with  the  look  of  an  angel  on  his  face. 
He  has  not  been  in  his  bed  the  livelong  night!" 

"Ah,  he  has  been  at  the  bedside  of  some  dying 
person  and  returned  late,  I  suppose." 

"  But  you  should  see  him !     With  the  rays  of 


134  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

the  sun  coming  in  through  the  shutters  on  his 
head,  he  makes  such  a  picture!  —  only  he  looks 
as  if  he  were  not  long  for  this  world!" 

Thoroughly  frightened,  Mrs.  Fields  rose  at 
once,  saying,  "Come,  John,  let  us  go  and  see 
for  ourselves  if  he  is  ill." 

"You  go!  I  must  hurry  off  to  my  business. 
I'm  late  now." 

Mr.  Fields  already  had  on  his  hat  and  over- 
coat. He  kissed  his  wife  in  a  perfunctory  way, 
while  she  protested  that  he  was  fast  becoming  a 
bloodless  machine,  and  was  soon  out  of  sight 
and  hearing. 

Mrs.  Fields  was  a  woman  of  the  large  blond 
type,  and  had  been  a  semi-invalid  since  the  loss 
of  her  son,  her  only  child.  As  she  imagined 
that  Abel  resembled  this  lost  son,  she  insisted 
upon  playing  a  mother's  part  to  him.  She  her- 
self prepared  his  cafe  au  lait  and  toast  every 
morning,  and  saw  that  he  had  a  fresh  egg  and 
fresh  fruit,  and  she  sent  the  dainty  breakfast  to 
his  study  at  a  certain  hour,  so  as  to  be  sure  that 
Abel  got  one  regular  meal  a  day. 

Mrs.  Fields  tapped  at  Abel's  door  before 
looking  in.  Receiving  no  response,  she  ven- 
tured within  and  was  immediately  struck,  as 
Letty  had  been,  with  the  angelic  beauty  of 
Abel's  face  as  he  reposed  in  his  big  armchair. 
Slanting  beams  of  sunlight  penetrated  the  partly 
closed  shutters  and  rested  on  his  head.  His 


MARY    AND    MARTHA  135 

fine,  glossy,  dark  hair,  which  parted  naturally 
in  the  middle  of  his  forehead,  was  tossed  back 
from  his  handsome  brow,  reminding  one  of  the 

*  O 

upper  part  of  the  head  of  the  Christ  in  Ra- 
phael's painting  of  the  "Transfiguration."  The 
features  of  the  lower  part  more  nearly  resembled 
those  of  "  II  Salvatore"  of  del  Sarto. 

"He  must  be  having  pleasant  dreams,"  said 
Mrs.  Fields  to  herself,  as  she  gazed  on  the  se- 
renity of  Abel's  countenance.  "  If  only  he  were 
not  so  thin,"  she  added,  as  she  noticed  the  un- 
natural whiteness  of  his  hands,  which  rested 
on  the  arms  of  his  chair.  "I  must  speak  to  my 
husband  about  arranging  a  long  vacation  for 
him,"  was  her  thought  as  she  retraced  her  steps. 

Mrs.  Fields  did  speak  to  her  husband  that 
same  evening  about  this  matter,  but  it  was  too 
late.  Mr.  Fields  was  a  busy  man,  immersed  in  a 
thousand  cares,  and  nothing  was  done  until 
after  Abel  was  down.  Overwork  and  irregular 
living  had  sown  the  seeds  of  an  illness  which  the 
worry  about  Heloise  and  the  coming  break  in  his 
relations  with  his  church  had  rapidly  developed. 
As  he  regained  strength  very  slowly,  and  his 
people  were  obliged  to  engage  a  temporary  sub- 
stitute, the  consent  of  those  in  authority  was 
finally  obtained  to  the  petition  of  the  Marys 
and  the  Marthas  that  their  pastor  should  be 
permitted  an  early  and  a  long  vacation.  It  was 
intimated  that  the  women  should  raise  the  extra 


136  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

money  required  to  send  him  away  somewhere, 
and  some  of  the  more  ambitious  sisters  suggested 
Europe.  The  men  claimed  that  they  already 
had  to  raise  more  money  for  church  matters 
than  they  knew  how  to  obtain. 

Mrs.  Symonds  was  the  first  one  to  be  con- 
sulted when  there  was  money  to  be  raised  by 
the  women,  so  Mrs.  Fields  hurried  to  that  lady's 
home  as  soon  as  the  desired  permission  had 
been  obtained  from  the  deacons. 

"Oh,  Mrs.  Symonds,"  was  her  greeting, 
"  how  could  we  do  without  you  ?  I  am  so  glad 
that  you  are  well  again." 

"Well,  what  is  wanted  now  ?"  asked  the  prac- 
tical Martha,  seating  her  visitor. 

"  Do  you  know  that  our  poor  minister  is  sick 
in  bed,  and  that  unless  something  is  done  for 
him  quickly,  he  may  never  leave  it  ?  Only  God 
knows  how  'twill  be!  But  I  have  been  cheering 
him  up  by  telling  him  he  shall  go  just  where  he 
likes  when  he  is  better,  and  stay  until  his  health 
is  fully  restored;  and  now  we  must  make  the 
money  to  give  him  a  good  send-off.  You  will 
take  this  matter  in  charge,  won't  you  ?  You 
are  always  our  leader  in  things  of  this  sort." 

"You  have  not  heard  that  I  am  getting  ready 
to  go  to  California  with  my  daughter?"  asked 
Mrs.  Symonds,  hesitatingly. 

"Yes,  I  have  heard  all  about  it,  and  how  your 
new  daughter  is  the  loveliest  creature  on  earth, 


MARY    AND    MARTHA  I 37 

and  lives  but  to  make  you  happy.  But  really, 
can't  you  serve  us  once  more  ?  Remember,  it's 
for  our  dear  minister,  who  has  nearly  com- 
mitted suicide  in  our  behalf  —  I  mean  a  slow, 
sacrificial  sort  of  suicide,"  begged  Mrs.  Fields. 

Mrs.  Symonds  glanced  quickly  and  sharply 
at  her.  Could  she  have  heard  the  cause  of  her 
son's  death  ?  She  had  merely  told  her  friends 
that  he  had  died  suddenly,  after  a  short  illness. 
She  could  not  bring  herself  to  say  more.  Evi- 
dently Mrs.  Fields  was  guiltless  of  a  knowledge 
of  the  fact  that  had  lain  like  a  nightmare  on  the 
mother's  soul,  for  she  was  placidly  gazing  about 
the  room,  noting  the  many  pretty  changes  which 
had  been  made  in  it  since  the  advent  of  the 
daughter,  and  how  many  elegant  additions 
there  were.  Then  she  signed  and  wished  that 
she,  too,  had  a  fresh  young  creature  to  love  her 
and  to  cling  to  her.  To  be  sure,  the  young 
minister  was  like  a  son  to  her  whenever  she  saw 
him,  but  alas,  he  was  so  busy  —  and  she  was 
obliged  to  share  his  affection  with  so  many 
other  people! 

"Well,  I  don't  mind,  although  we  expect  to 
go  West  within  a  month,  and  have  many  things 
to  arrange;  since  I'm  never  coming  back,  ex- 
cept to  visit,  it  will  crowd  me  a  good  deal.  But 
there's  justice  in  what  you  say.  Our  minister 
has  nearly  —  if  not  quite  —  lost  his  life  for  us, 
and  it's  only  fair  that  we  help  him  regain  it.  I 


138  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

love  the  man,  though  I  despise  his  creed.  With 
his  tender  heart  he  ought  not  to  be  connected 
with  any  orthodox  church." 

"So  you  have  really  become  a  free  thinker? 
I  mean  an  outspoken  one  ?  There  are  many 
women  doing  a  deal  of  thinking  nowadays,  but 
they  mostly  keep  quiet  about  it.  You  know 
what  the  Bible  says?"  inquired  Mrs.  Fields, 
calmly. 

"Yes,  I  know  what  the  Bible  says,  and  I  know 
what  common  sense  says.  Common  sense 
says  that  since  God  gave  women  a  tongue  which 
moves  freely  in  her  mouth,  He  meant  her  to  use 
it  for  the  things  which  are  lovely  and  of  good 
report.  Is  orthodoxy  lovely  and  of  good  re- 
port ?  No,  it  is  not;  it  is  a  hideous  libel  on  God 
and  His  dealings  with  man.  It  is  based  on 
that  shameful  Adam  and  Eve  story,  where  God 
is  made  to  curse  and  carry  on  like  a  vindictive 
and  fanatical  creature  of  the  human  species." 

"  But  you  are  a  member  of  our  church.  Surely 
you  can't  throw  stones  at  the  rest  of  us  ? "  Mrs. 
Fields  smiled  in  her  usual  easy-going,  pleasant 
manner. 

"  I  shall  soon  be  clear  of  this  whole  mess  of 
madness  and  the  rubbish  which  has  been  our 
approved  spiritual  food!" 

"Going  to  run  away  —  eh?"  This  time 
Mrs.  Fields  laughed  outright. 

"Yes,  Mrs.  Fields,  that  is  one  of  the  reasons 


MARY    AND    MARTHA  139 

why  I  am  willing  to  leave  almost  everything 
I  hold  dear  and  go  into  a  strange  country  among 
strange  people." 

"Ah,  but  you  should  not  take  orthodoxy  so 
seriously!  I  know  of  no  other  woman  who 
takes  it  so  hard  as  you  do.  I  don't!  If  we 
can't  hinder  the  men  from  believing  horrid 
things,  we  might  as  well  keep  still  and  make  the 
best  of  things  as  we  find  them,  and  passively 
accept  the  situation.  That's  my  creed!  I  get 
along  very  well  with  my  husband  by  knowing 
when  to  keep  still  and  when  to  speak." 

"Then  you  love  your  husband  better  than 
you  love  truth  ?"  asked  Mrs.  Symonds  tartly. 

"  Ah,  me  —  what  is  truth  ?  Do  any  of  us 
know  ?  —  and  in  the  meantime  I  love  peace  and 
my  husband."  Mrs.  Fields  looked  affec- 
tionately into  the  eyes  of  her  severe  friend. 

Her  kindly,  sentimental  nature  rebelled  against 
some  of  the  things  taught  in  the  Bible,  but  as  a 
judge  of  creeds  she  distrusted  herself  and  felt 
no  call  to  traverse  dangerous  ground.  Down 
deep  in  her  heart  she  felt  sure  that  the  Andover 
Creed  (which  her  husband  believed  to  be  the 
most  perfect,  because  in  early  life  he  had  studied 
to  be  a  minister  at  the  Andover  Theological 
Seminary)  was  not  fit  for  a  mother  to  hold,  but 
she  refrained  from  saying  so,  "because  it  would 
hurt  dear  John's  feelings." 

"None  of  us  know  what  is  truth,  but  it  always 


140  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

seemed  to  me  that  we  ought  to  be  true  to  what 
we  believe  to  be  the  truth,"  returned  Mrs. 
Symonds. 

"  How  is  it  that  you  have  only  lately  awakened 
to  the  untruthful  nature  of  the  faith  that  you 
have  always  professed  ?" 

"Well,  I  have  always  done  some  private 
thinking,  but  like  you  I  kept  quiet  about  it. 
My  son's  sudden  death  revolutionized  me.  He 
was  not  orthodox,  so,  according  to  the  orthodox 
creed,  he  is  to  awake  to  shame  and  everlasting 
contempt,  and  with  devils  be  plunged  into  the 
lake  that  burneth  with  fire  and  brimstone  for- 
ever and  forever,"  said  Mrs.  Symonds  bitterly, 

"Oh,  Heavens!  For  pity's  sake  be  quiet! 
I  have  not  read  an  orthodox  creed  for  years, 
and  I  can't  bear  to  listen  to  that  portion  of  it. 
Come,  let  us  put  our  heads  together  about  rais- 
ing the  necessary  money  for  our  beloved  pastor's 
trip  to  Europe,  where  he  is  to  stay  until  he  is  a 
new  man  physically!" 

"And  theologically,  I  hope!"  added  Mrs. 
Symonds. 

"No,  no,  that  won't  do!  The  deacons  never 
would  permit  it.  They  are  business  men  who 
respect  theological  systems  too  much  to  ever 
learn  anything." 

"Well,  I'm  ready  to  do  everything  I  can  to  get 
our  minister  as  far  away  as  possible  from  that 
ignorant,  narrow,  autocratic  set.  I  will  call 


MARY    AND    MARTHA  14! 

and  see  you  about  the  matter  to-morrow  morn- 
ing, if  you  will  be  at  leisure.  Just  now  I  must 
be  off  on  some  business  matters  with  my  dear 
daughter.  She  is  waiting  for  me,  I  see,  outside, 
in  the  carriage.  We  will  take  you  with  us  as  far 
as  your  home,  if  you  would  care  to  ride  ? " 

"Thank  you.  I  shall  be  delighted.  —  Yes, 
do  come  in  the  morning  early!  We  must  get  to 
work  as  quickly  as  possible,"  she  added  as  they 
moved  toward  the  door.  "Shall  you  join  any 
church  where  you  are  going  ? " 

"My  daughter  belongs  to  what  I  believe  she 
calls  'The  Free  Christian  Church.'  Whether 
that  is  its  correct  name  or  not,  I  cannot  say. 
She  tells  me  that  any  person  over  eighteen  years 
of  age  can  become  a  voting  member  by  registra- 
tion of  name  and  address  and  the  payment  of  a 
small  sum  each  year.  It  is  quite  democratic  in 
government,  you  see,  and  no  doctrinal  agree- 
ment is  required.  Its  aim  is  to  provide  means 
of  spiritual  development,  without  the  repressing 
and  depressing  influence  of  old,  outgrown  theo- 
logical systems." 

"How  are  you  to  be  saved  according  to  this 
new  democratic  church  ? " 

"The  Free  Christian  Church,  it  seems,  looks 
upon  nobody  as  eternally  lost;  and  salvation 
merely  means  deliverance  from  superstition, 
sin,  and  ignorance  —  the  last  two  being  usually 
one  and  the  same  thing.  One  is  to  cease  to  do 


142  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

evil  and  learn  to  do  well,  in  obedience  to  the 
laws  of  Nature  and  with  the  assistance  of  a  wise 
and  loving  God,  who  is  not  only  the  Father  but 
also  the  Mother  of  the  human  family." 

"So  you  do  not  have  to  make  any  special 
preparations  for  a  future  life  —  do  not  have  to 
repent,  accept  Christ,  and  go  about  trying  to 
save  other  people  —  and  all  that  sort  of  thing  ?" 
inquired  Mrs.  Fields,  a  little  more  interested 
than  she  cared  to  show. 

"  In  so  far  as  Christ  was  God-like,  we  accept 
Him,  of  course.  What  the  new  Free  Christians 
are  not  obliged  to  accept  is  the  theological  sys- 
tem which  makes  salvation  depend  on  the  ac- 
ceptance of  a  certain  group  of  ideas,  that  when 
subjected  to  the  light  of  reason  becomes  a  libel 
on  the  goodness  and  wisdom  of  the  Creator  of 
the  Universe,"  replied  Mrs.  Symonds,  as  they 
took  their  seats  in  the  carriage. 


CHAPTER  XI 
THE  MYSTERY  OF  PAIN 


"THE  laws  of  disease  are  as  beautiful  as  the  laws  of 
health." 


XI 


The  Mystery  of  Pain 

4* 

A  LIFE  of  study  and  reflection  had  given 
Heloise  what  the  world  called  advanced 
views,  but  she  never  thought  of  putting  them  for- 
ward. If  anyone  had  asked  her,  "Why  do  you 
not  go  out  in  the  world  and  work  for  the  equality 
of  men  and  women  —  in  marriage  and  in  the  na- 
tional life?"  she  would  very  likely  have  said: 
"I  feel  no  call  to  a  public  life  of  any  kind. 
Besides,  is  it  not  the  men,  our  fathers, 
brothers,  husbands,  sons,  who  have  placed 
and  keep  us  where  we  are,  and  is  it  not  for 
them  to  restore  us  to  our  God-given  place  by 
their  side  ?" 

If  the  interlocutor  had  continued,  "Why, 
then,  do  you  not  do  as  others  do  —  marry  into 
avowed  inequality,  trusting  to  man  to  right  the 
present  unequal  condition  of  the  sexes  in  his 
own  good  time  and  way  ? "  she  would  have  re- 
plied: "I  can't  quite  make  up  my  mind  to  do 
evil  hoping  that  good  will  come,  and  active  op- 
position is  not  my  forte.  I  can  only  be  firm  in 
passive  rejection.  I  will  not  marry  promising 
lifelong  vassalage  to  any  man.  I  will  not  help 
to  propagate  an  inequality  which  retards  the 

H5 


146  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

advance  of  the  American  people  and  hence  the 
race." 

However,  in  some  respects  Heloise  was  a 
woman  with  very  commonplace  ideals.  She 
inherited  the  natural  instinct  of  every  woman 
for  a  home.  When  she  went  West  her  guiding 
thought  was  that  by  so  doing  she  might  prepare 
a  home  for  Abel  and  herself  and  have  it  in  prime 
order  against  the  time  when  they  could  enter  it 
as  husband  and  wife,  in  the  way  she  approved, 
a  home  where  they  could  live  mostly  out  of 
doors;  for  Heloise  loved  the  blue  sky,  the  wide 
ocean,  trees,  fruits,  flowers,  even  unornamental 
vegetables.  All  her  life  she  had  been  shut  up 
in  boarding-houses,  or  within  college  or  hospital 
walls.  She  panted  for  outdoor  Nature  as  a 
convict  sighs  for  freedom.  When  she  found 
herself  in  love  with  "  Abelard"  her  first  thought 
was  to  go  West,  to  South  California,  where  peo- 
ple live  much  in  the  arms  of  nature,  and  to 
steadfastly  set  about  making  a  home. 

In  order,  however,  to  be  able  to  do  this  money 
must  be  made  and  saved.  She  would  pursue 
her  profession  of  a  trained  nurse  until  she  could 
secure  a  plot  of  land  on  which  she  could  make  a 
living  and  lay  by  something  each  year.  She 
dreamed  of  a  comfortable  and  picturesque  cot- 
tage, nothing  more,  for  were  they  not  going  to 
live  mostly  out  of  doors,  like  the  people  of  the 


THE    MYSTERY    OF    PAIN  147 

pictures  in  the  New  Year's  number  of  the  big 
newspaper  ? 

Heloise  found  little  difficulty  in  procuring  a 
situation,  which,  unpromising  as  it  must  have 
looked  to  others  —  that  of  nurse  to  a  woman 
subject  to  epileptic  fits  —  was  quite  to  her  mind 
because  it  was  in  the  country,  not  far  from  a 
suburb  of  Los  Angeles.  She  was  to  receive  an 
excellent  salary,  since  the  situation  was  not  a 
coveted  one,  and  since  she  was  also  to  act  as 
housekeeper  in  the  somewhat  solitary  place. 

Mrs.  Hall,  whom  Heloise  was  to  serve,  had 
in  younger  days  been  very  beautiful.  Her  hus- 
band had  been  a  brave,  handsome  man,  who 
was  sure  that  marriage  would  cure  his  lovely 
bride  of  the  infirmity  which  had  attacked  her 
at  intervals  since  early  youth.  Years  of  tender- 
ness had  failed  to  ameliorate  the  physical  in- 
security of  the  woman,  and  now  that  her  hus- 
band was  dead  and  her  children  scattered  her 
life  was  becoming  each  day  more  uncertain, 
and  each  day  more  to  be  dreaded,  because  of 
the  increasing  visits  of  the  terrible  disease. 

Mrs.  Hall  greeted  her  new  nurse  with  a  pallid 
face  and  the  ghost  of  a  smile.  Heloise  thought 
that  she  had  never  seen  a  countenance  so  bereft 
of  hope.  Yet  there  was  a  sort  of  pathetic  resig- 
nation about  the  woman's  look  and  manner 
that  won  her  heart  in  an  instant. 

"My  dear  young  woman,"  sighed  rather  than 


148  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

said  Mrs.  Hall,  "how  full  of  life  you  look.  It's 
a  sad  place  you  have  come  to.  We  —  the  house, 
the  ground,  myself —  are  in  decay.  It  is  a  pity 
to  bury  the  living  with  the  dead." 

Again  the  invalid  sighed  as  she  offered  Hel- 
oise  a  chair.  She  was  sitting  underneath  a 
great  tree  in  front  of  the  house. 

"  Do  not  worry  about  me,"  said  Heloise  with 
her  brightest  smile.  "I  am  delighted  with 
everything  I  see  in  this  beautiful  country.  I 
am  sure  I  shall  love  you  and  your  cottage  and 
your  trees  ;  and  the  flowers,  too,  which  I  see  are 
struggling  for  dear  life  in  the  embrace  of  so 
many  weeds." 

"Yes,  the  weeds  have  taken  advantage  of  my 
increasing  weakness  and  are  in  possession. 
Only  the  big  trees  hold  their  own,  and  they  need 
trimming.  If  you  are  not  too  tired  from  your 
journey  I  will  show  you  my  poor  decaying  place. 
It  needs  a  lot  of  money  spent  upon  it  and  I  have 
none  to  spare." 

"I  am  not  in  the  least  tired  and  I  should  be 
charmed  to  see  everything,"  returned  Heloise. 

Mrs.  Hall  took  Heloise  over  the  house  first. 
It  was  a  simple  cottage  with  a  porch  in  front 
and  contained  but  five  rooms.  While  it  was 
reasonably  clean,  everything  looked  old  and  out 
of  repair.  As  Heloise  passed  through  the  rooms 
she  observed  that  some  repairs  and  restora- 
tions were  quite  within  her  own  strength  and 


THE    MYSTERY    OF    PAIN  149 

skill,  others  required  man's  trained  hand  and 
ingenuity. 

The  grounds  lay  mostly  at  the  rear  of  the 
house  and  were  overgrown  with  rank  weeds, 
some  of  which  were  veritable  instruments  of 
torture,  as  the  venturesome  Heloise  soon  dis- 
covered. 

"To  be  frank,  your  garden  seems  to  be  a  sur- 
vival of  the  unfittest!"  said  Heloise,  as  she 
looked  about  and  saw  enough  weeds  to  stock 
the  country  round  about. 

"Yes,  they  ought  to  be  burned  but  I  dare 
not  undertake  it.  My  son  has  been  going  to 
attend  to  them  for  some  time  past,  but  he  is 
very  busy  and  forgets  how  fast  weeds  grow  and 
mature  in  this  country." 

"Are  you  willing  that  I  should  fight  them 
while  you  are  asleep  or  do  not  especially  need 
my  services  in  the  house  ?"  asked  Heloise,  look- 
ing longingly  at  the  field  of  tall,  dry  brambles 
and  burrs,  underneath  which  was  growing  a 
new  crop. 

"Indeed,  I  should  be  more  than  willing,  but 
I  fear  you  would  spoil  that  lovely  complexion 
of  yours,  and  your  hands  —  have  they  ever  done 
a  bit  of  hard  labor?" 

"You  will  soon  learn  whether  my  hands  are 
good-for-nothing  or  otherwise.  Ah,  I  am  over- 
joyed at  all  I  see!"  and  Heloise  was  the  picture 
of  rosy  delight. 


150  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

"Overjoyed!  Why,  there  is  nothing  to  see 
but  a  field  of  rank  weeds  with  some  fruit  trees 
and  big  bushes  struggling  for  life  in  the  midst  of  a 
wilderness  of  thorns  and  thistles."  Mrs.  Hall 
turned  her  sad  blue  eyes  upon  her  nurse  and 
heaved  a  deep  sigh. 

Heloise  was,  however,  too  healthy  and  energetic 
to  be  affected  by  the  despair  of  her  employer. 

"Do  not  grieve  any  more  over  this  little  wil- 
derness of  weeds,  for  it  will  soon  be  a  little  para- 
dise of  fruit  and  flowers.  I  love  Nature  and 
shall  work  so  hard  that  she  will  be  encouraged 
to  do  her  best." 

Heloise  gave  her  mistress  a  wistful  look,  fear- 
ing that  she  might  on  second  thought  take  back 
her  generous  promise  to  let  her  have  a  free  hand 
in  the  garden. 

But  Mrs.  Hall  evidently  had  no  such  intention, 
though  she  said  warningly: 

"Be  careful  of  that  lovely  complexion,  and 
those  rosy-tipped  fingers.  If  I  were  able  I 
would  have  a  man  do  the  rough  work  and  let 
you  merely  superintend  it.  But  to  employ  a 
man  whom  I  could  trust  would  cost  me  more 
than  I  can  spare  just  now.  Besides,  things 
have  to  be  looked  after  constantly  or  the  busy 
weeds  are  again  in  evidence." 

"Ah,  these  big  saucy  weeds!  They'll  find 
in  me  a  sharp-eyed  mistress,"  said  Heloise, 
shaking  her  head  at  them. 


THE    MYSTERY   OF    PAIN 

"You  seem  very  mild.  I  cannot  imagine 
you  looking  severe,"  returned  Mrs.  Hall. 

"Oh,  that  is  because  I  have  never  had  any 
weeds  to  deal  with.  Do  you  know,  I  believe 
that  this  new  environment  is  going  to  make  of 
me  an  energetic,  sharp-eyed,  managing  sort  of 
an  individual?"  Heloise  spoke  with  a  deci- 
sion that  surprised  herself. 

Mrs.  Hall  sighed,  and  smiled  almost  at  the 
same  time  —  her  fleeting,  ghostly  smile.  Then 
she  shook  her  head. 

"That  would  be  a  pity,  for  we  have  already 
so  many  of  that  kind  of  women  in  America. 
We  need  more  of  the  Madonna  type  who  are 
satisfied  to  love  and  smile  and  adore  the  young 
child  that  God  places  in  their  care.  Promise 
me  that  if  you  will  work  in  the  garden  you  will 
wear  my  big,  light  straw  hat.  It  is  lined  with  a 
delicate  shade  of  silk  that  protects  the  com- 
plexion from  the  too  ardent  sun.  Also  you 
must  wear  my  heavy  gloves  —  unless  you  have 
already  provided  yourself  with  these  things  ?" 

Heloise  admitted  that  she  had  nothing  of  the 
kind,  and  they  walked  slowly  back  to  the  house. 
Mrs.  Hall  explained  to  her  nurse  the  frequency 
of  late  of  her  epileptic  seizures  and  assured  her 
that  she  need  not  be  alarmed  at  her  horrible 
appearance  when  they  were  at  their  worst,  even 
if  she  had  the  appearance  of  being  dead.  She 
assured  Heloise  that  she  need  not  even  look  a 


152  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

her,  and  that  nothing  was  to  be  done  under  these 
circumstances;  that  when  the  fit  was  over  she 
recovered  consciousness  and  could  easily  assist 
herself  to  rise,  if  she  were  attacked  in  the  day 
time.  If  at  night,  she  presently  went  to  sleep 
again,  or  remained  awake  courting  sleep,  as  the 
case  might  be.  If  Heloise  was  quite  determined  to 
do  away  with  the  weeds  in  her  garden,  the  best  time 
to  do  so  was  in  the  morning,  for  she  herself  did  not 
rise  early.  When  she  required  Heloise  to  prepare 
her  breakfast  she  would  blow  a  shrill  whistle. 

They  supped  pleasantly  together,  chatting 
meanwhile  of  various  matters  of  small  moment, 
for  Mrs.  Hall  was  a  woman  of  the  old-fashioned 
type,  excellent  in  some  respects,  but  having  a 
narrow  horizon.  In  a  way,  she  was  well  versed 
in  the  Scriptures,  and  spent  much  of  her  leisure 
in  reading  them.  Having  all  her  life  been  sub- 
ject to  an  affliction  which  made  her  a  martyr, 
she  yet  was  the  most  loyal  of  Christians,  the 
most  unquestioning  and  devoted  of  believers. 
So  child-like  was  she  in  her  faith  that  when 
Heloise  asked  if  she  had  tried  a  certain  new 
remedy  for  her  complaint,  she  promptly  an- 
swered, "No,  indeed  not!  When  I  was  young 
I  used  to  pray  that  God  would  remove  this 
terrible  thorn  in  my  flesh,  but  as  nothing 
came  of  my  prayers  I  was  convinced  that,  like 
St.  Paul,  I  needed  this  messenger  of  Satan  to 
buffet  me,  lest  I  should  be  exalted  above  measure.'' 


THE    MYSTERY    OF    PAIN  153 

That  night  when  they  had  retired  to  Mrs. 
Hall's  chamber,  which  Heloise  was  also  to  oc- 
cupy, Mrs.  Hall  asked  her  to  read  aloud  the 
twelfth  chapter  of  Second  Corinthians,  and  in- 
structed that  if  she  was  not  asleep  by  the  time 
the  chapter  was  finished  she  was  to  keep  on 
reading  until  she  sank  into  slumber.  Mrs. 
Hall  had  been  accustomed  to  the  monotonous, 
sing-song  manner  of  reading  of  the  average  nurse 
and  a  chapter  or  two  usually  had  the  desired 
effect.  Her  new  nurse,  however,  had  been 
taught  to  read  with  great  expression,  and  as  she 
had  a  voice  which  was  melody  itself,  this  hour 
became  a  feature  of  Mrs.  Hall's  life.  That 
first  evening  Heloise  thought  the  invalid's  eyes 
would  never  close.  Ah,  she  little  knew  what  a 
beautiful  picture  she  made,  and  how  the  old 
woman  was  carried  back  to  the  time  when  her 
own  face  and  figure  were  pleasant  to  look  upon, 
and  incense  and  devotion  were  hers  —  instead 
of  constant  affliction  and  loneliness. 

"  And  is  there  no  thorn  in  your  life,  my  beau- 
tiful maid  ? "  asked  the  woman  at  last. 

"Oh  yes,  I  have  my  thorn  in  the  flesh,"  re- 
plied Heloise  promptly. 

"One  would  never  guess  it.  You  are  the 
picture  of  health.  Surely  it  can't  be  much  of  a 
thorn."  A  pitiful  attempt  at  a  smile  played 
about  the  woman's  colorless  lips. 

"  Perhaps  not,  but  I  find  it  difficult  to  bear." 


154  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

"  Do  you  mind  telling  me  what  kind  of  a  thorn 
it  is?" 

For  the  first  time  Heloise  saw  a  look  of  inter- 
est on  Mrs.  Hall's  face,  in  place  of  the  apathy 
that  dwelt  there.  Partly  because  she  wished 
to  distract  the  deeply  afflicted  woman  from  her 
troubles  and  partly  to  relieve  her  own  soul, 
Heloise  described  her  meeting  with  Abelard, 
the  rare  friendship  and  profound  love  which 
had  followed,  and  the  cruel  separation. 

"And  what  separated  you  ?" 

"Religion,"  laconically  replied  Heloise. 

"That  is  odd.  Why,  it  was  religion  which 
joined  me  to  a  lover  who  adored  me  and  whom  I 
worshiped,  when  my  affliction  had  come  nigh 
separating  us.  Three  different  times  did  I 
reply  'No'  with  firmness,  fearing  that  if  we 
married  our  children  and  descendants  might  be 
visited  with  my  terrible  affliction.  It  was  only 
when  he  brought  me  a  Bible  with  the  words 
'Be  fruitful  and  multiply'  well  underscored 
that  I  consented  to  become  his  bride." 

"Have  your  children  and  grandchildren  es- 
caped inheriting  your  malady  ?" 

"Every  one,  thus  far;  and  my  husband  was  a 
devoted  lover  to  the  very  last  hour  of  his  life.  I  do 
not  see  how  I  could  have  lived  without  him." 

"You  are  patiently  living  without  him  now," 
suggested  Heloise  with  a  tender  smile. 

"No,  I  am  not  living!     I  am  merely  existing 


THE    MYSTERY    OF    PAIN  155 

from  day  to  day  and  from  night  to  night.  This 
is  not  life:  It  is  a  living  death,  which  I  bear 
with  such  patience  and  resignation  as  God 
grants  me.  I  am  often  tempted  to  take  a  sleep- 
ing potion  and  end  it  quickly;  it  would  be  so 
much  better  for  my  children.  They  are  poor 
and  they  could  inherit  my  little  income.  But  I 
dare  not!  My  husband  was  faithful  to  the  end, 
and  I  too  must  be  faithful  in  order  to  be  with 
him  in  heaven  when  I  drop  this  body.  I  doubt 
not  that  he  is  waiting  as  patiently  for  me  as  I 
am  for  him!"  and  she  dropped  back  upon  her 
pillow,  exhausted. 

In  the  middle  of  the  night  Heloise  was  sud- 
denly awakened  from  a  deep  slumber  by  a  feel- 
ing that  something  had  happened.  She  put 
her  hand  forth  in  the  direction  of  Mrs.  Hall  and 
it  seemed  to  come  into  contact  with  a  corpse. 

She  rose  quickly  and  lighted  a  lamp.  Holding 
it  in  one  hand  she  stooped  over  the  sufferer. 
Was  she  dead  or  was  she  merely  in  a  fit  of  a  more 
deadly  character  than  usual  ?  Heloise  could 
not  be  sure  and  she  watched  her  with  the  ut- 
most anxiety  for  a  few  moments,  caressing  her 
forehead  with  a  soft  palm  as  she  did  so.  Pres- 
ently, she  was  delighted  to  see  Mrs.  Hall  open 
her  eyes.  Heloise  hastened  to  put  down  her 
light  and  smiled  in  an  encouraging  manner  — 
for  must  it  not  be  exceedingly  depressing  to 
wake  so  often  from  a  condition  so  like  death  as  to 


156  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

be  scarcely  distinguishable  from  it,  only  to  return 
into  the  same  condition  of  hopeless  misery  ? 

As  soon  as  Mrs.  Hall  could  speak  she  said 
pleadingly:  "At  last  I  am  in  heaven,  am  I  not  ? 
And  you  are  a  ministering  spirit  ?  Oh,  take  me 
quickly  to  my  husband.  He  is  waiting  for  me! 
Dear  spirit,  hasten,  hasten!" 

Tears  filled  the  eyes  of  Heloise.  How  could 
she  undeceive  the  woman  —  tell  her  that  she 
was  still  in  the  midst  of  death.  When  Mrs. 
Hall  saw  the  tears  she  said:  "Alas!  I  am  still 
fastened  to  this  horrible  body  which  a  mockery 
of  death  is  always  pretending  to  free  me  from 
but  never  does.  Oh,  it  is  so  trying  to  have  this 
fiend  always  shooting  his  dart  into  me  —  making 
me  a  spectacle  so  hideous  that  my  own  children 
cannot  live  with  me!  What  would  you  do  if 
you  were  me?  Come,  tell  me!  Oh,  I  am  so 
tired  of  it  all!"  Mrs.  Hall  grasped  the  young 
nurse's  hands  and  held  them  tight  while  she 
awaited  the  answer. 

"  I  think  I  should  always  be  seeking  a  cure  at 
the  hands  of  Science.  So  many  diseases  have 
been  mastered  by  this  intrepid  friend  of  the 
race,  that  surely  the  time  is  coming  when  yours, 
too,  will  be  subject  to  the  skill  of  man." 

"I  used  to  think  that  perhaps  I  had  been 
taken  possession  of  by  a  devil.  If  so,  no  one 
has  ever  been  able  to  exorcise  him  or  drive  him 
away  for  any  length  of  time.  But  blow  out  the 


THE    MYSTERY    OF    PAIN  157 

light  and  come  to  bed!  It  is  not  likely  that  I 
shall  have  another  fit  to-night.  Sometimes  I 
escape  for  several  days.  Occasionally  for  a 
week  or  two.  And  again  I  may  have  several 
very  close  together." 

After  the  light  had  been  extinguished  for 
some  little  time  and  Mrs.  Hall  had  tried  in  vain 
to  go  to  sleep,  she  said  suddenly: 

"  Do  you  believe  that  it  is  a  devil  that  tortures 
me  in  this  dreadful  manner  ?" 

Heloise  had  fallen  into  a  light  slumber,  but 
she  wakened  immediately  when  her  mistress 
spoke,  and  replied: 

"No,  no!  how  could  I  believe  that  God  would 
permit  a  malignant  spirit  to  torture  for  so  many 
years  a  good  woman,  such  as  I  already  know 
you  to  be  ?" 

"Then  why  this  endless  suffering,  this  endless 
slavery  ?"  asked  Mrs.  Hall  with  a  groan. 

"I  do  not  know,  unless  it  is  because  our  an- 
cestors did  not  know  how  to  live  and  we  our- 
selves are  still  sinning  against  Nature's  laws. 
But  many  diseases  have  been  conquered  by  the 
science  of  man  and  this  will  be  mastered  like- 
wise —  perhaps  in  your  time." 

This  idea  was  so  new  and  so  refreshing  to 
Mrs.  Hall  that  her  mind  dwelt  upon  it  until  she 
peacefully  fell  asleep. 


CHAPTER  XII 
THE  BIG  ENVELOPE 
4* 


"  IF  thou  fill  thy  brain  with  Boston  and  New  York, 
with  fashion  and  covetousness,  and  wilt  stimulate  thy 
jaded  senses  with  wine  and  French  coffee,  thou  shalt 
find  no  radiance  of  wisdom  in  the  lonely  waste  of  the 
pine  woods."  —  Emerson. 


XII 


The  Big  Envelope 


THE  next  morning  Heloise  rose  with  the  sun. 
She  dressed  herself  quickly,  and  did  not  for- 
get to  place  on  her  shining,  tightly  coiled  hair  the 
big  leghorn  hat,  and  to  encase  her  hands  in  the 
stout  gloves.  She  also  crossed  a  silk  handker- 
chief about  her  neck  and  pinned  it  fast  to  her 
dress.  For  an  instant  she  glanced  into  her 
looking-glass  and  smiled  as  she  saw  the  pic- 
turesque figure  it  reflected  back  to  her,  then 
slipped  out  of  doors  so  quietly  that  a  mouse 
would  scarcely  have  been  disturbed,  much  less 
Mrs.  Hall,  who  was  sleeping  soundly. 

Ah,  how  delicious  the  air!  how  glorious  the 
rising  sun!  even  how  sweet  and  calm  and  statu- 
esque looking  were  the  tall  weeds!  thought 
Heloise,  as  she  paused  a  moment  to  glance 
about  her.  She  felt  inclined  to  run  about  the 
yard  like  a  child  before  beginning  her  work. 
She  recalled  the  story  of  the  eland  who  was  al- 
lowed out  in  his  garden  for  the  first  time  after 
the  weather  had  become  warm;  how  he  had 
run  and  jumped  for  joy,  and  finally,  as  his 
spirits  mounted  higher,  had  rushed  up  to  a 
young  tree,  then  knelt  before  it,  put  his  horns 

161 


l62  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

about  it  and  pulled  it  up  by  the  roots.  She  did 
not  feel  the  need  of  pulling  up  any  trees,  as  there 
were  plenty  of  weeds  the  thickness  of  whose 
stalks  called  for  all  her  energy.  When  she 
realized  what  a  multitude  there  were  she  quickly 
sought  some  farming  implements  which  were 
kept  hidden  underneath  the  house.  These 
proved  to  be  in  a  very  bad  condition  and  so  dull 
that  nearly  a  golden  hour  had  passed  before  she 
was  ready  to  attempt  any  sort  of  a  fight  against 
her  enemies  —  the  briars  and  the  thorns;  and 
even  after  she  had  spent  all  this  time  in  trying 
to  mate  the  various  parts  of  tools  she  found, 
and  had  used  a  little  whetstone  until  the  per- 
spiration fairly  ran  down  her  cheeks,  the  small 
surprises  in  store  for  her  did  not  lessen.  The 
head  of  the  hatchet  would  fly  from  its  handle 
without  warning,  narrowly  missing  her  head 
before  alighting.  The  rake  and  the  hoe  played 
pranks  not  so  dangerous  but  more  nagging,  so 
that  Heloise's  first  morning  was  a  fight  with 
her  tools  rather  than  with  the  burrs.  Still, 
she  managed  to  get  one  moderate-sized  pile  of 
burr-brush  cut  and  heaped,  and  to  make  a 
broad  enough  circle  of  cleared  earth  about  it  so 
that  the  fire  would  not  spread. 

Then  she  applied  the  match.  Oh,  what  joy  to 
watch  the  tongues  of  flame  madly  shoot  through 
this  dry  heap,  emitting  a  sharp,  crackling  sound, 
and  then  leap  fiercely  heavenward!  The 


THE    BIG    ENVELOPE  163 

flames  rose  so  high  and  spread  so  rapidly  that 
Heloise  became  alarmed.  What  if  they  should 
shoot  over  the  cleared  space  and  set  fire  to  the 
bushes  on  the  other  side  ?  In  that  case  it 
would  take  but  a  few  moments  to  burn  the  whole 
place  down;  for  everything  was  as  dry  as  tinder. 
The  house  would  burn  like  kindling  wood. 

She  seized  the  hoe  and  began  to  widen  the 
space  towards  which  a  slight  morning  breeze 
was  bending  the  flames.  The  hoe,  perceiving 
its  opportunity  to  have  a  little  fun  on  its  ^own 
account,  immediately  flew  off  the  handle  and 
landed  in  the  midst  of  the  fire. 

"You  are  well  punished  for  your  little  joke," 
said  Heloise,  as  she  proceeded  to  use  the  heavy 
shovel  in  its  place.  It  was  hot,  tedious  work, 
but  she  persisted  until  she  saw  that  the  flames 
were  dying  down  as  rapidly  as  they  had  risen. 
She  had  just  begun  to  cut  some  more  stalks 
preparatory  to  heaping  a  new  pile,  when  the 
shrill  whistle  sounded.  She  gathered  her  tools 
quickly  together,  halting  only  an  instant  to 
glance  at  the  quantity  of  dry,  tall  stalks  which 
still  held  their  ground. 

"Ah,  your  days  are  numbered,"  she  said,  as 
she  laughingly  shook  her  head  at  them  before 
retreating  within  doors. 

The  rest  of  the  morning  was  spent  in  the  little 
cottage  with  her  mistress,  but  after  dinner,  while 
Mrs.  Hall  was  taking  her  usual  afternoon  nap, 


164  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

Heloise  went  again  to  the  garden,  this  time  root- 
ing up  the  weeds  in  the  beds  in  front  of  the  house, 
which  were  robbing  the  flowers  of  their  vitality 
and  presenting  to  the  passer-by  that  dismal  pic- 
ture, an  unweeded  garden.  She  enjoyed  this 
freeing  of  the  pretty,  delicate  flowers  from  the 
monopolistic  enemies  who  were  absorbing  their 
substance,  and  leaving  them  to  slowly  perish, 
but  she  found  more  excitement  in  fighting  the 
briars,  burrs  and  thorns  in  the  large  plot  at  the 
back  of  the  house.  There  she  could  call  to  her 
aid  that  mysterious  agent  of  nature  called  fire, 
and  revel  in  joy  while  he  worked  at  her  bidding, 
chuckling  as  he  did  so,  and  making  at  the  same 
time  such  a  gorgeous  picture.  What  a  friend  of 
man  is  this  thing,  rightly  controlled  and  rightly 
used! 

Next  morning  Heloise  managed  to  pile  and 
burn  two  more  heaps  of  brush.  While  the  last 
one  was  flaming  high  above  her  head,  and  she 
was  gazing  at  its  work  of  swift  destruction  in  a 
state  of  mingled  delight  and  awe,  there  sud- 
denly came  to  her  a  realizing  sense  of  how  it 
was  that  a  timid  people,  who  were  at  the  same 
time  vindictive  by  nature,  might  find  a  certain 
satisfaction  in  the  thought  that  God  would 
sometime  make  a  bonfire  of  their  enemies  as  she 
had  done  with  the  burrs.  But  where  did  the 
ancient  people  who  first  conceived  this  idea  get 
the  other  notion  that  the  big  bonfire  was  to  last 


THE    BIG    ENVELOPE  165 

always  ?  Could  it  be  that  they  wished  to  enjoy, 
from  a  safe  distance,  the  spectacle  of  a  bonfire 
that  never  died  down,  but  flamed  in  dazzling 
splendor  everlastingly  ? 

"Ah,  what  children  they  were,  to  be  sure," 
meditated  Heloise,  as  she  turned  her  back  on 
the  charred  remains  of  the  thorns  at  the  shrill 
call  of  Mrs.  Hall's  whistle. 

"And  what  children  we  are  to  take  so  much 
of  their  prattle  seriously,"  she  added  aloud  to 
herself  as  she  stepped  into  the  house. 

Though  Heloise  scarcely  ever  spoke  of  her 
Abelard,  he  was  never  absent  from  her  prayers 
and  rarely  for  any  length  of  time  from  her 
thoughts.  If  she  read  anything  beautiful, 
strange,  or  suggestive,  she  wished  with  all  her 
heart  that  he  could  read  and  enjoy  it  too.  When 
the  flames  of  her  bonfires  rose  highest  and 
crackled  loudest,  she  found  herself  saying, 
"Oh,  if  Abelard  could  only  enjoy  this  gay  scene 
with  me!"  And  when  she  had  made  the  house 
unusually  tidy  and  had  prepared  a  little  daintier 
meal  than  usual,  she  yearned  for  her  distant 
lover  to  share  it  with  them.  But  Heloise's 
nature  was  no  less  optimistic  than  that  of  Emer- 
son, the  sage  she  loved;  and  where  another  per- 
son would  have  been  sad  from  a  thousand  tender 
fears,  she  was  almost  always  buoyant  with  the 
hope  that  in  God's  own  good  time,  Abelard  and 
she  would  be  able  to  share  each  other's  lives  as 


l66  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

intimately  and  truly  as  their  hearts  could  wish. 

Three  weeks  flew  by,  weeks  rilled  with  bon- 
fires, with  a  multiplicity  of  small  household 
duties,  with  tender  care  for  her  mistress  —  who 
would  sometimes  fall  in  a  terrible  fit  before  the 
sympathetic  nurse  could  so  much  as  put  forth 
her  hand  to  break  the  fall  —  and  with  repairs, 
usually  of  a  petty  order. 

A  great  philosopher  has  declared  that  if  life 
were  not  so  full  of  surprises  it  would  not  be 
worth  living.  Assuredly,  Heloise  had,  of  late, 
been  treated  to  a  series  of  startling  surprises, 
some  of  so  serious  a  nature  that  they  might  have 
been  called  shocks. 

First  had  come  the  sudden  death  of  a  dear 
girl  friend.  Then  had  followed  the  shock  of 
her  father's  illness,  which  had  called  her  quickly 
to  his  side;  and  while  with  him  came  the  thrilling 
surprise  which  the  dart  of  Love  never  fails  to 
give  —  to  be  followed  by  a  shock  as  bitter,  al- 
most, as  the  other  had  been  sweet  —  that  of  her 
father's  sudden  death. 

This  last,  together  with  the  knowledge  that 
she  loved  and  was  loved  in  return,  had  caused 
her  to  remove  from  one  side  of  America  to  the 
other  in  search  of  the  home  her  fancy  dictated. 
She  expected  to  live  an  uneventful  life  for  some 
years,  filled  with  what  most  people  would  call 
common  duties,  common  delights,  and  common 
thoughts..  And  then,  perhaps,  America  w.ould 


THE    BIG    ENVELOPE  167 

be  ready  to  wed  her  sons  and  daughters  on  a 
plane  of  equality.  Ah,  what  a  new  world  this 
would  open  up  to  Abelard  and  herself,  and  to 
all  of  America's  brave  sons  and  noble  daughters. 

This  sweet  dream  was,  however,  rudely  dis- 
pelled by  a  new  shock  almost  as  great  as  any 
that  had  preceded  it,  the  arrival  of  a  big  official- 
looking  letter,  the  reading  of  which  caused 
Heloise's  face  to  grow  very  pale  and  the  reluc- 
tant tears  to  gather  in  her  lovely  eyes. 

Mrs.  Hall,  perceiving  her  agitation,  and  feeling 
a  vague  alarm  that  this  mysterious-looking  docu- 
ment meant  mischief,  and  would  perhaps  de- 
prive her  of  an  attendant  to  whom  she  had 
become  warmly  attached,  said  anxiously: 

"  Dear  Heloise,  tell  me  quickly  —  is  anything 
wrong  ? " 

They  were  seated  underneath  the  big  tree 
in  front  of  the  house.  It  was  late  in  the  after- 
noon; the  sun  was  setting  and  cast  long  shadows 
across  the  bright  landscape. 

"My  brother  died  a  month  ago,"  said  Hel- 
oise, as  she  knelt  by  her  mistress's  side  and 
buried  her  face  in  her  lap. 

At  that  moment  his  death  seemed  a  crushing 
event  to  the  weeping  girl,  for  she  had  come  West 
with  the  secret  hope  in  her  breast  that  after  all 
her  brother  might  be  alive  and  that  there  might 
be  a  romantic  reunion.  It  is  true,  she  had 
only  the  vaguest  of  memories  of  him,  as  they  had 


1 68 


ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 


been  separated  since  she  was  but  a  girl  of  ten, 
and  since  the  day  when  he  ran  away  from  the 
school  where  his  father  had  placed  him  no  news 
of  him  had  reached  home  —  during  all  the  years 
that  had  passed.  And  now  he  was  dead  and 
buried.  Two  of  the  five  children  had  died  in 
infancy.  Her  mother  and  one  child  had  passed 
away  quickly  after  the  separation  of  her  parents, 
and  now  her  father  and  the  last  son  were  gone. 
She  alone  remained  of  a  group  of  seven. 

Mrs.  Hall  stroked  the  sunny  brown  hair  of 
the  kneeling  girl,  but  presently  she  began  to 
sway  over  the  side  of  the  chair  until  her  head 
nearly  reached  the  ground.  Instantly  Heloise 
rose,  and  succeeded  in  getting  the  afflicted 
woman's  body  in  a  more  comfortable  position 
by  removing  her  chair,  so  that  she  could  lie  flat 
on  the  grass  until  the  attack  was  relaxed. 

While  Heloise  obeyed  her  employer  implicitly 
and  promptly  as  a  rule,  there  was  one  matter 
in  which  she  would  have  her  own  way.  She 
persisted  in  not  only  watching  her  anxiously  at 
the  periods  when  she  was  in  the  grip  of  her  ter- 
rible foe,  but  would  pillow  her  head  in  her  soft 
lap,  stroking  her  forehead,  and  smiling  her  ten- 
derest  smile  when  the  stony  face  began  to 
brighten  with  intelligence.  So  finally  Mrs. 
Hall  gave  up  trying  to  coerce  her  and  found 
herself  giving  a  ghostly  smile  in  return. 

To-day,    there    being   a    suspicious    redness 


THE    BIG    ENVELOPE  169 

about  Heloise's  eyes,  as  she  smiled  when  her 
mistress's  face  resumed  its  usual  look,  Mrs. 
Hall,  having  forgotten  what  had  taken  place 
before  her  attack,  asked: 

"What  is  the  matter  ?     Are  you  ill  ?" 

"No,  I  am  as  well  as  usual.  The  news  of  my 
brother's  death  has  made  me  sad." 

"Oh,  forgive  me,  Heloise!  Will  his  death 
have  any  effect  on  your  life  ?"  asked  Mrs.  Hall, 
as  Heloise  helped  her  to  a  seat. 

"Yes,  it  will  make  a  great  difference." 

"  How  ?  Will  you  have  to  leave  me  ?  Oh, 
don't  tell  me  that!  I  am  just  beginning  to  enjoy 
life  once  more." 

"Would  you  like  to  read  my  letter?"  asked 
Heloise. 

"No,  I  think  not.  I  prefer  you  should  tell 
me  the  substance  of  it.  My  head  is  not  very 
clear  and  my  eyes  are  dim." 

"Well,  the  letter  acquaints  me  with  the  fact 
of  my  brother's  death  and  tells  me  that  he  has 
made  me  his  heir.  It  seems  he  was  a  man  of 
many  affairs.  The  writer  urges  me  to  come  to 
Denver  at  once  and  look  after  my  new  posses- 
sions." 

"Ah,  my  God!  I  guessed  it!  I  was  sure  that 
big  envelope  meant  no  good  to  me!"  Mrs  Hall 
burst  into  tears. 

"Don't  be  too  sure  that  the  contents  of  the 
big  envelope  means  no  good  to  you  and  yours. 


I/O  ABELARD    AND    HEUDISE 

Wait  a  little  before  judging,"  said  Heloise,  with 
a  mysterious  look,  so  unusual  for  her,  in  truth, 
that  Mrs.  Hall  stopped  weeping  and  looked  at 
her  in  an  inquiring  manner.  "Something  that 
will  mean  a  good  deal  to  somebody  not  far  away 
is  in  that  mysterious  packet.  Well,  well,  wait  a 
few  days  —  and  then  see  if  you  feel  like  crying. 
In  the  meantime  I  will  get  you  something  to 
eat."  Heloise  glanced  at  her  watch.  "It's 
high  time!"  she  added,  as  she  kissed  Mrs.  Hall 
lightly  on  the  brow  and  disappeared  quickly 
into  the  house. 


CHAPTER  XIII 
THE  ANGEL   IN  THE  WILDERNESS 


'LovE  heeds  not  caste,  nor  sleep  a  broken  bed." 
'I    WENT    in    search   of   love    and    lost    myself." 

Hindu  Proverbs. 


XIII 


The  Angel  in  the  Wilderness 


THE  Bible  has  often  been  used  as  a  means 
of  coercion,  some  of  it  for  hundreds  of 
years;  a  part  of  it  for  several  thousand. 

When  Heloise  told  her  mistress  that  her  broth- 
er's solicitors  had  sent  her  a  cheque  in  case  she 
might  need  some  money  with  which  to  expedite 
her  preparations  for  a  more  or  less  prolonged 
stay  in  Colorado,  where  her  brother's  property 
was  largely  located,  she  begged  to  be  allowed 
to  spend  the  money  in  completing  what  she  had 
begun  —  the  transformation  of  a  neglected 
home  into  a  well-kept  one.  At  first  Mrs.  Hall 
firmly  refused  this  generous  offer,  making  in- 
numerable objections,  and  as  Heloise's  time 
was  short  and  she  wished  to  accomplish  much 
more  before  she  bade  her  kind  mistress  adieu, 
she  had  recourse  to  the  Bible  to  help  her  gain 
her  ends,  remembering  how  her  husband  had 
wooed  her. 

She  underlined  the  words,  "  Freely  as  ye  have 
received,  freely  give,"  and  carried  the  book  to 
her.  Mrs.  Hall  put  on  her  glasses  and  read  the 
marked  verse  carefully. 

"  But  are  you  sure,  my  dear,  that  there  are  no 

'73 


heavy  encumbrances  on  the  property  you  are 
getting  ?  I  know  a  good  many  people  who  have 
a  lot  of  property,  but  so  mortgaged  that  their 
lives  are  worried  out  of  them  to  raise  the  inter- 
est when  it  is  due.  My  daughter's  husband 
might  be  alive  to-day  if  it  had  not  been  for  the 
mortgage  on  his  property.  It  kept  him  con- 
stantly behind  and  harried  him  into  his  grave. 
And  now  my  daughter  is  trying  to  carry  on  the 
business  and  is  dying  of  that  same  burden. 
Heaven  only  knows  what  will  become  of  her 
poor  children!" 

Mrs.  Hall  sank  into  one  of  her  gloomy  rev- 
eries, and  forgot  all  about  the  newly  under- 
scored words  in  her  Bible. 

"  I  fear  you  have  forgotten  your  Bible.  Pray 
read  the  underlined  portion  over  again,"  begged 
Heloise,  with  a  pretty  supplicating  look  in  her 
eyes;  "and  do  not  fear,"  she  went  on,  "but  that 
I  shall  receive  freely.  Indeed,  I  gather  from 
the  letter  that  my  income  is  to  be  a  very  large 
one.  The  Bible  also  affirms  that  'it  is  more 
blessed  to  give  than  to  receive.'  Surely,  you 
will  not  deprive  me  of  this  joy?"  They  had 
just  finished  their  morning  meal  and  Heloise 
was  eager  to  turn  her  cheque  into  money,  and 
the  money  into  various  delightful  improvements 
which  had  occurred  to  her  since  her  stay  with 
Mrs.  Hall. 

Being    urged    again,   Mrs.  Hall   deliberately 


THE  ANGEL  IN  THE  WILDERNESS  175 

read  the  underlined  words  over  once  more,  for 
she  had  lost  her  once  tenacious  memory,  and 
her  mind  was  sometimes  all  confusion. 

"Yes,  yes,  the  Bible  is  right,"  she  said  finally. 
"And  since  you  are  sure  you  have  received 
freely,  you  may  do  as  you  like  in  my  poor  de- 
caying little  home." 

Heloise  rose  and  kissed  her  affectionately  on 
her  brow.  The  next  morning  while  she  was 
performing  certain  little  labors  of  love  it  was 
decided  that  Mrs.  Hall  should  spend  the  day 
with  her  daughter,  so  as  to  leave  Heloise  at 
liberty  to  go  to  Pasadena  and  procure  such 
assistance  as  she  required  to  carry  out  her  plans. 

Having  seen  Mrs.  Hall  safely  in  her  daugh- 
ter's care,  Heloise  proceeded  to  an  employment 
office  which  had  been  recommended  to  her, 
and  obtained  a  promise  that  all  the  people  she 
required  should  be  despatched  to  Mrs.  Hall's 
abode  within  two  days  at  the  outside.  Next, 
she  went  to  one  of  Mrs.  Hall's  sons,  who  was  a 
contractor  in  a  small  way,  and  engaged  him  to 
buy  for  her  a  trusty  horse  of  mature  years,  and 
an  easy  but  not  expensive  carriage  which  would 
seat  four  at  a  pinch. 

There  still  remained  in  her  pocket  a  long  list 
of  household  necessities  to  be  bought,  mostly 
articles  of  small  expense,  but  which,  properly 
used,  add  greatly  to  the  comfort  of  a  home. 
Some  of  them  were  great  time-savers,  a  precious 


176  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

quality  in  the  eyes  of  Heloise,  who  looked  upon 
those  who  invent  them  as  among  the  greatest 
benefactors  of  the  race. 

Four  o'clock  had  struck  before  she  could  re- 
join Mrs.  Hall  at  her  daughter's  home,  which 
was  close  to  the  store  which  she  had  taken  on 
her  shoulders  since  her  husband's  death.  Only 
one  person  was  in  the  store,  a  young  lad,  the 
son  of  the  proprietress.  He  too  left  his  post  to 
follow  his  grandmother's  nurse  into  the  house, 
where  all  were  making  merry  over  the  good 
news  brought  to  them  by  "grandma." 

Heloise  found  herself  quickly  surrounded  by 
a  group  which  included  the  small,  black-eyed, 
energetic  daughter,  Mrs.  Smith,  all  her  five 
children,  and  some  people  who  seemed  much  at 
home  and  were  probably  either  neighbors  or 
good  customers,  or  perhaps  both.  All  gave 
Heloise  admiring  glances,  while  Mrs.  Smith 
poured  out  sincere  thanks  without  measure; 
thanks  which  took  a  pathetic  turn  and  quickly 
brought  tears  to  the  eyes  of  the  susceptible 
members  of  the  group. 

Perceiving  that  the  affair  was  becoming  too 
serious,  Heloise  began  to  insist  that  there 
were  no  thanks  due  her  from  any  one;  that 
she  was  simply  doing  what  she  enjoyed,  and 
what  every  healthy  person  liked  to  do  if  he  had 
a  chance. 

"What  is  that  ?"  asked  one  of  the  boys. 


THE  ANGEL  IN  THE  WILDERNESS  177 

"Spending  money!"  replied  Heloise  promptly. 

"You  bet!  I  wish  I  had  some  to  spend!" 

"  And  I ! "  shouted  another,  who  was  followed 
by  a  general  chorus  of  "I  too!" 

Seeing  that  the  children  were  getting  out  of 
hand,  Mrs.  Smith  interposed,  saying: 

"  But  you  must  first  learn  to  be  industrious 
and  responsible  like  this  young  lady;  after  that 
perhaps  you  will  find  yourselves  with  something 
to  spend." 

Silence  followed  this  speech,  for  Mrs.  Hall 
had  passed  most  of  the  day  telling  how  per- 
severingly  Heloise  had  worked  until  she  had 
rid  the  whole  place  of  weeds,  and  how  she  had 
loosened  the  soil  and  applied  the  well-rotted 
manure  to  many  a  perishing  plant.  As  her 
daughter  had  frequently  urged  her  boys  to  go 
to  their  grandmother's  and  pull  up  some  of  the 
weeds,  and  as  they  had  resisted,  saying,  "Oh, 
they'll  grow  right  up  again !  What's  the  use  ? " 
they  felt  condemned;  hence  their  silence,  which 
Heloise  broke  by  asking  one  of  the  lads,  who 
had  a  book  in  his  hands,  if  he  liked  to  read. 

"You  bet  he  likes  to  read!  He's  good  for 
nothing  else!"  half  shouted  the  elder  brother. 

"  Do  you  go  to  school  ?" 

"No;  we're  too  poor." 

"Is  there  no  public  school  near?"  asked 
Heloise,  glancing  at  his  mother  as  she  spoke. 

"Not  very  near  —  besides  I  have  neither  the 


178  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

time  nor  the  money  to  spare  to  keep  him  dressed 
up  like  the  rest  of  the  children.  So  he  stays 
at  home  and  does  errands." 

"Ah,  that  seems  too  bad!"  said  Heloise 
thoughtfully. 

She  said  no  more  in  regard  to  the  matter  until 
she  accompanied  Mrs.  Hall  and  her  daughter 
into  another  room  when  they  were  about  to 
leave.  Then  she  rapidly  spoke  of  a  little  plan 
that  had  suggested  itself  to  her.  She  began  by 
asking  Mrs.  Smith  if  she  would  be  willing  her 
book-loving  lad  should  see  that  the  weeds  did 
not  again  get  the  upper  hand  in  his  grand- 
mother's place,  provided  she  made  him  a  pres- 
ent of  a  bicycle  and  guaranteed  him  nice  clothes 
and  a  little  money  to  spend  each  month.  Mrs. 
Smith  was  delighted  with  the  proposition,  and 
called  Horace  in  to  show  Heloise  how  happy 
he  would  be  and  how  ready  to  accept  her  offer. 

That  young  rascal  no  sooner  heard  the  matter 
through  than  he  rushed  out  —  not  even  stopping 
to  thank  Heloise  —  to  shout  his  good  luck  to 
his  companions.  This  caused  a  general  hub- 
bub, in  the  midst  of  which  Heloise  and  Mrs. 
Hall  made  their  escape. 

On  the  way  home  they  saw  everywhere  beau- 
tiful well-kept  orange  groves  and  fine  pictur- 
esque grounds  in  the  midst  of  which  were  charm- 
ing residences.  At  last  they  came  in  sight  of 
Mrs.  Hall's  place,  which  no  longer  presented 


the  appearance  of  an  unweeded  garden,  but 
which  was  still,  in  comparison  with  the  rest  of 
the  neighborhood,  a  sort  of  blot. 

"My  poor  little  home!  My  poor  little  home!" 
sighed  Mrs.  Hall.  "I  fear  it  was  an  unlucky 
day  for  you  when  you  entered  my  little  patch 
of  thorns  and  thistles.  You  may  get  ill  from 
overwork  and  need  for  yourself  the  money  you 
are  spending  on  it." 

While  she  was  speaking,  Heloise  opened  the 
rickety  gate  for  her,  and  as  she  did  so  it  impo- 
litely tumbled  flat  on  the  ground.  Heloise  im- 
mediately picked  it  up  and  with  Mrs.  Hall's 
help  replaced  it,  laughingly  saying  as  she  did  so: 

"Oh,  it  was  your  weeds  and  burrs  that  devel- 
oped the  spirit  of  enterprise  in  me.  If  your 
home  had  been  a  little  paradise  I  might  still  be 
a  dreamy  time-server,  performing  my  routine 
of  commonplace  duties  in  a  tame,  conventional 
manner.  Thank  heaven,  I  say,  for  nature's 
tendency  to  be  ever  relapsing  into  a  wilderness!" 

Having  unlocked  the  front  door  for  Mrs. 
Hall,  Heloise  passed  on  through  the  cottage  to 
the  walk  through  the  back  yard,  which  was 
flanked  by  great  black  patches  where  once  had 
flourished  the  survival  of  the  unfittest.  She 
found  that  the  lumber  man  had  kept  his  word, 
for  there  were  shingles  in  the  barn  for  re-cover- 
ing the  roof  and  lumber  for  other  repairs. 

"A  good  beginning!"  she  said  to  herself,  as 


l8o  ABELARD   AND    HELOISE 

she  walked  back  to  prepare  a  little  supper.  She 
was  very  hungry,  having  eaten  merely  a  "stand- 
up"  lunch  in  the  middle  of  the  day,  and  after  sup- 
per she  was  so  tired  that  she  was  obliged  to  de- 
sist from  her  preparations  for  the  advent  of  a 
group  of  assistants  that  were  coming  bright  and 
early  on  the  morrow. 

"It  seems  a  pity  that  one  has  to  spend  so 
much  time  in  sleep,"  she  said  later  when  bed- 
time had  come. 

"I  can't  agree  with  you,  my  dear.  I  am 
always  hoping  I  can  sleep.  It's  the  dreary 
time  trying  to  sleep,  with  all  the  bitter  mem- 
ories haunting  me,  which  make  life  a  burden." 

"Ah,  but  suppose  you  try  pulling  weeds  for  a 
change  and  give  the  fancy  work  a  rest,  and  take 
the  new  remedy  we  learned  of  the  other  day  ? 
Who  knows  but  that  after  a  while  sleep  would 
turn  about  and  woo  you!" 

Mrs.  Hall  turned  to  Heloise  and  gave  that 
persistent  young  woman  a  real  smile  in  place  of 
the  usual  ghostly  one.  Then  she  said  with 
more  animation  than  she  had  yet  shown: 

"  I  am  seriously  thinking  of  taking  your  ad- 
vice. God  does  not  seem  to  want  me  to  die 
yet,  and  perhaps  he  has  sent  you  here  to  help 
me  to  get  well.  Yes,  I  will  take  the  medicine 
regularly  and  I  will  help  my  grandson  keep  the 
weeds  down." 

Heloise  was  so  delighted  to  hear  these  prom- 


THE  ANGEL  IN  THE  WILDERNESS  l8l 

ises  that  she  put  her  arms  about  the  woman's 
neck  and  kissed  her  repeatedly.  Then  she 
found  her  place  in  the  Bible  and  read  as  usual 
until  Mrs.  Hall  was  fast  asleep.  Heloise  was 
pleased  that  one  chapter  —  and  a  short  one  at 
that  —  was  sufficient.  As  for  herself  she  prayed 
as  earnestly  as  usual  for  the  happiness  of  her 
dear  Abelard,  and  having  done  so  fell  asleep 
as  soon  as  her  head  touched  the  pillow. 

She  rose,  however,  the  next  morning  as  fresh 
as  if  her  days  were  being  passed  in  Paradise. 

-ri       r          i  • 

1  he  hrst  hours  were  spent  in  putting  out  some 
new  plants  that  had  arrived  too  late  to  be  at- 
tended to  the  evening  before.  This  was  a  labor 
of  love,  and  Heloise  smiled  as  she  thought  how 
surprised  and  delighted  Mrs.  Hall  would  be 
when  they  greeted  her  with  their  first  offerings 
of  exquisite  blossoms.  This  little  job  finished, 
she  wondered  if  the  new  hose  had  been  brought 
up.  She  washed  her  hands  and  proceeded  to 
look  under  the  house.  Ah,  yes,  there  it  lay,  a 
great  coil  of  it,  wire-covered  and  somewhat 
heavy  to  manage,  but  too  substantial  to  spring 
a  leak  and  give  one  a  sudden  shower  bath;  or 
to  be  always  turning  the  driveway  or  walk  into 
a  small  river,  when  it  should  be  conducting  a 
stream  of  cold  water  to  the  roots  of  some  thirsty 
tree. 

The  next  hour  which  Heloise  spent  in  the 
garden  was  a  delicious  one.     The  fresh  morn- 


l82  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

ing  air  was  an  intoxicant  of  the  finest  kind. 
Then  the  stillness  which  reigned,  broken  only 
by  the  songs  of  birds,  was  so  sweet.  Every 
liberated  plant,  every  bush  which  she  had  dug 
about  and  given  an  extra  tip  by  way  of  well- 
rotted  manure,  seemed  to  be  eloquently  thank- 
ing her.  She  felt  the  grateful  acknowledg- 
ments of  help  received,  and  recognized  the 
graceful  promises  to  pay  in  return  many  fold. 
It  was  only  when  she  went  to  the  back  of  the 
house  to  do  some  necessary  watering  that  a 
shadow  came  over  the  brightness  of  her 
face,  brought  there  by  the  black  desolation 
which  the  scene  presented.  There  was  not 
a  living  weed  to  be  seen,  but  there  were 
plain  evidences  of  the  hot  fires  in  which  she 
had  burned  them,  and  many  charred  roots 
threatened  more  trouble  unless  dealt  with  rigidly 
and  promptly. 

"What  sinners  they  were,  to  be  sure,"  she 
said  to  herself  as  she  looked.  "They  had  no 
conscience.  They  took  all,  giving  nothing  in 
return.  It  is  necessary  to  totally  destroy  them. 
To-day  will  see  a  complete  routing  of  them,  root 
and  branch,  I'm  thinking,  for  the  man  with 
the  plough  is  coming  and  the  landscape  gar- 
dener, and  soon  there  will  be  nothing  to  remind 
one  of  their  embittering  and  tyrannical  exist- 
ence. But  'Rest  in  Peace/  all  ye  departed 
weeds  and  burrs!  Ye  grew  and  multiplied 


THE  ANGEL  IN  THE  WILDERNESS  183 

after  your  kind,  only  the  kind  was  unfit  for  my 
lady's  garden  and  ye  had  to  go!'* 

Here  the  shrill  whistle  sounded  and  Heloise's 
parting  reflections  in  connection  with  the  weeds 
and  burrs  were  cut  short.  She  placed  the  nozzle 
of  her  hose  so  that  a  certain  big  tree  could  get 
its  fill  of  liquid  nourishment,  and  \\ent  into  the 
house  to  get  Mrs.  Hall's  breakfast. 

That  was  the  last  meal  Heloise  ever  prepared 
for  her  mistress;  for  during  the  day  the  new 
nurse  put  in  an  appearance  and  took  the  cul- 
inary part  of  the  labors  off  her  hands;  thus  giv- 
ing her  the  more  time  to  superintend  the  repairs 
of  the  premises. 

The  first  workmen  to  arrive  were  the  two  men 
who  were  to  put  a  new  roof  on  the  barn,  hang 
the  doors  and  give  them  good  locks;  also  make 
a  chicken  house  and  covered  run  for  the  half- 
dozen  choice  fowls  and  rooster  that  Heloise  had 
bought.  Then  came  the  man  with  his  horse 
and  plough  and  soon  after  the  landscape  gar- 
dener. Then  the  man  with  the  shears  put  in 
an  appearance  and  was  soon  making  the  tall, 
straggling  hedge  about  the  premises  a  straight, 
neatly-clipped  wall  of  beauty.  At  one  o'clock 
came  a  couple  of  painters  who  set  to  work  with 
their  brushes. 

For  a  whole  week  most  of  this  busy  group 
remained,  eating  their  dinners  out  of  their  tin 
pails  under  a  big  tree  in  the  back-yard  and  being 


184  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

treated,  in  addition,  to  excellent  coffee  and 
fresh  fruit.  The  three  women,  Mrs.  Hall, 
Heloise,  and  Mrs.  Redmond,  the  new  nurse, 
ate  theirs  in  the  house  and  were  only  a  little  less 
merry  than  the  men  outside;  for  the  nurse  was 
full  of  Irish  wit,  and  was  brimming  over  with 
funny  stories;  which  she  poured  out  with  a 
voluble  tongue.  Mrs.  Hall  seemed  to  like  her 
very  much,  and  even  occasionally  laughed  at  her. 

While  Heloise  took  out  the  men's  coffee  to 
them,  Mrs.  Redmond  improved  the  oppor- 
tunity to  find  out  all  she  could  about  the  person 
whose  shoes  she  was  to  fill. 

"That's  a  very  handsome  nurse  you've  got. 
Where  did  you  pick  her  up  ?"  she  began. 

"My  son  engaged  her  in  Los  Angeles.  She 
had  splendid  testimonials  as  to  training  and 
character.  I  believe,  though,  her  father  was 
the  only  patient  she  had  nursed,  outside  of 
hospital  walls,  until  she  came  to  me." 

"  It  is  odd  she  came  to  this  lonely  place,  where 
there's  nobody  to  look  at  her!  But  she  seems 
to  have  soon  tired  of  the  job.  That's  the  way 
with  young  and  handsome  women.  They  are 
as  capricious  and  changeable  as  an  April  day." 

"  Heloise  is  not  leaving  me  because  she  wishes 
to  go,"  replied  Mrs.  Hall  in  a  slightly  offended 
tone. 

"Why,  then?  You  give  her  a  good  salary, 
considering  the  work,  and  your  home  will  be  a 


THE  ANGEL  IN  THE  WILDERNESS  185 

sweet,  pretty  place  as  soon  as  your  workmen 
are  done  with  it.  I  suppose  you  would  even 
increase  her  salary  in  order  to  keep  her  ?  You 
seem  greatly  attached  to  her." 

Mrs.  Hall  hesitated  for  a  moment  as  to  the 
reply  she  should  make.  She  was  sure  Heloise 
would  not  wish  the  new  nurse  to  know  that  she 
was  the  one  who  was  turning  the  old  and  di- 
lapidated place  into  a  pretty,  cozy  home,  and 
she  herself  did  not  wish  to  pose  as  an  object  of 
charity. 

Finally  she  said,  "  It  is  an  important  business 
matter  which  is  taking  Heloise  away  from  me 
so  soon.  Her  brother  has  lately  died  and  his 
affairs  have  to  be  put  into  shape." 

"Oh!  —  that  accounts  for  her  mourning 
clothes  and  her  sad  looks,  when  she  is  not  smil- 
ing. I  thought  she  had  some  secret  sorrow, 
but  supposed  it  was  merely  some  love  affair 
that  was  not  going  to  her  liking.  She's  at  an 
age  when  a  woman's  mind  is  full  of  love  fan- 
cies. It  is  dangerous  to  depend  on  such  for 
help.  Better  to  pick  out  a  strong  woman,  not 
too  old,  —  in  the  neighborhood  of  fifty  or  sixty, 
like  myself." 

Mrs.  Hall  was  saved  the  necessity  of  supply- 
ing further  details  regarding  Heloise,  by  the  re- 
turn of  the  object  of  their  conversation. 

It  was  the  men's  turn  to  discuss  Heloise,  now 
that  her  back  was  turned. 


l86  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

"Mighty  good  coffee  this,  and  it  tastes  none 
the  worse  for  being  handed  to  a  fellow  by  a 
mighty  pretty  young  woman.  Where  did  she 
come  from  ?" 

It  was  the  gardener  who  asked  the  question. 
He  was  a  tall  young  fellow  of  twenty-three 
or  thereabouts,  with  a  well-browned  skin,  high, 
full  forehead,  dreamy  eyes  and  a  handsome 
mustache.  He  was  dressed  in  a  picturesque 
manner  and  was  full  of  artistic  conceits.  He 
aimed  to  become  a  landscape  gardener  second 
to  none. 

"She  came  from  around  Boston,  they  tell 
me,"  the  man  of  the  plough  answered.  His 
name  was  Twinkel,  and  it  suited  him  well  in 
some  respects.  His  eyes  were  small,  and  he 
had  a  shrewd  come-and-go  smile. 

O 

"From  Boston!  There  must  be  some  mis- 
take. I'll  wager  you  anything  that  those  fine 
arms,  that  well-molded  bust  and  those  glorious 
lips  were  never  developed  in  Massachusetts  — 
or  any  other  New  England  State.  What  do 
you  bet?"  demanded  the  picturesque  young 
gardener. 

"Put  your  money  away.  I'll  find  out  all 
about  her  for  you  —  if  that's  what  you  want. 
But  there's  no  use  in  your  a-settin'  your  affec- 
tion on  her,  Banks,  for  she's  going  to  Denver 
in  five  or  six  days  for  good." 

All  the  men  looked  disappointed  at  this  piece 


THE  ANGEL  IN  THE  WILDERNESS  187 

of  information  —  with  one  exception  —  that 
of  the  man  who  did  the  pruning.  He  had  some 
little  grudge  that  morning  against  the  gardener 
and  enjoyed  his  look  of  disappointment. 

"That's  not  giving  a  fellow  a  fair  chance," 
replied  the  crestfallen  Mr.  Banks. 

"Why?  Did  you  think  you  could  hypnotize 
her  with  those  dreamy  eyes  of  yours  ?"  chuckled 
Twinkel. 

"She  might  go  farther  and  do  worse,"  spoke 
up  one  of  the  shinglers.  He  was  a  small,  wea- 
zened man  with  a  profound  admiration  for  the 
stalwart  Banks. 

"So  I  say,"  agreed  Twirikel.  "But  there's 
no  telling  what  sort  of  a  beast  a  woman  will  fall 
in  love  with.  There's  that  Lucretia  Snow,  the 
loveliest  creature  God  ever  made,  I'm  a-think- 
in',  who  has  just  thrown  herself  into  the  arms 
of  that  dark,  coarse-haired,  sullen  half-breed, 
whose  mother  is  a  full-blooded  Indian,  —  and 
only  because  the  fellow  is  rich.  Heavens! 
Think  what  her  children  will  be  like  —  half 
Indian  —  often  worse  than  the  real  Indians!" 

A  rather  coarse  laugh  followed  this  speech, 
which,  however,  had  apparently  not  been  heard 
by  Mr.  Banks,  as  he  asked: 

"  How  did  you  learn  that  this  handsome  young 
woman  is  not  going  to  remain  here  much  longer, 
Twinkel?" 

"Oh,  I  got  around  the  old  woman  —  told 


1 88  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

her  she  was  improvin'  her  own  looks  as  fast  as 
the  looks  of  the  place.  Told  her  she  must  have 
a  rare  good  nurse  and  that  I  hoped  she  knew 
enough  to  hold  on  to  a  good  thing  when  she'd 
got  it." 

"What  did  she  say?     Tell  me  every  word!" 

"Well,  she  said  she  knew  she  was  an  ex- 
ceptionally good  nurse,  —  in  fact  she  never 
again  expected  to  meet  her  equal.  But  she  said 
she  might  as  well  cry  for  the  moon  as  try  to  keep 
the  young  lady  with  her.  It  seems  she  has 
fallen  heir  to  some  property  and  must  go  to 
Denver  to  look  after  it.  So  you  see  it's  all  up 
with  you,  Banks!  She  will  be  surrounded  by 
an  army  of  fortune-hunters." 

"Fortune-hunters!  Why,  a  fellow  would  be 
passing  rich  to  secure  her  love  and  hand  without 
a  penny  in  her  pocket!  I'd  take  her  fast  enough 
on  those  conditions.  But  she  ought  to  have  a 
throne  from  which  to  sway  the  destiny  of  mul- 
titudes of  God's  creatures." 

"Would  you  like  to  install  her  as  mistress  of 
that  pretty  cottage  of  yours,  with  them  fairy- 
like  grounds  attached  ?  That  would  be  a  good 
settlin'  for  her  —  by  Jove!" 

"I  think  so,  too!"  said  Banks,  pulling  out  a 
case  containing  cigarettes.  Having  lighted  one, 
he  subsided  into  a  dreamy  reverie  as  he  watched 
the  smoke  curl  upward  into  the  light,  delicate 
atmosphere. 


CHAPTER  XIV 

REPUBLICAN  ROYALTIES 


"YouR  days  are  freely  devoted  to  foolish  amuse- 
ments and  useless  actions,  interminable  toilet-making, 
seances  with  dressmakers,  dinners,  pink  teas,  so- 
called  literary  lectures,  receptions,  balls  and  theaters. 

"You  spend  your  time  in  gossip  which  is  stupid 
when  it  is  not  wicked. 

"You  grovel  with  astonishing  alacrity  to  gain  ad- 
mittance into  social  circles  above  your  own,  and  cannot 
conceal  your  asinine  contempt  for  people  supposedly 
below  yourselves. 

"This  is  the  sort  of  life  a  society  woman  leads." 

—  Zola. 

"As  long  as  our  civilization  is  essentially  one  of 
property,  offences,  of  exclusiveness,  it  will  be  mocked 
by  delusions.  Our  riches  will  leave  us  sick;  there  will 
be  bitterness  in  our  laughter,  and  our  wine  will  burn 
our  mouth.  Only  that  good  profits  which  we  can 
taste  with  all  doors  open  and  which  serves  all  men." 

—  Emerson. 

"COME  what  may,"  said  an  Englishman  to  me  not 
long  ago,  "we  are  bound  to  possess  the  wealth  of  the 
American  millionaires,  in  the  long  run,  through  the 
American  women." 


^^ 


XIV 


Republican  Royalties 

* 

THE  next  day  the  young  gardener  had  a  much 
better  opportunity  to  secure  an  occasional 
glance  and  word  from  "the  young  mistress" 
than  he  had  on  the  day  preceding,  as  the  man 
with  the  plough  and  the  man  with  the  shears, 
who  had  claimed  some  notice  from  her,  had 
finished  their  jobs  and  gone  away. 

Banks  was  charmed  to  find  that  their  ideas 
as  to  the  laying  out  of  the  burr  field  was  pre- 
cisely the  same.  In  matters  of  taste,  if  he  made 
a  suggestion  Heloise  was  sure  to  think  it  "just 
the  thing,"  while  if  she  had  an  inspiration  in 
regard  to  the  arrangement  of  a  certain  plot  he 
promptly  replied  that  "nothing  could  be  better," 
that  her  suggestion  was  "a  stroke  of  genius." 
And  it  gradually  came  to  pass  that  Mrs.  Hall 
superintended  the  improvements  taking  place 
within  the  house,  while  Heloise  was  left,  more 
and  more,  to  look  after  the  remodeling  of  the 
grounds. 

On  the  third  day  Alfred,  while  finishing  his 
dinner,  had  an  inspiration.  He  hoped  it  would 
turn  out  successfully.  It  was  nothing  less  than 
to  invite  Mrs.  Hall  and  Heloise  to  visit  that  same 


ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

evening  his  own  garden,  one  of  the  most  beau- 
tiful, for  its  size,  of  the  numerous  enchanting 
spots  in  South  California.  Accordingly,  when 
Heloise  was  pouring  out  his  coffee,  he  said  with 
decision : 

"  I'm  not  sure  but  that  you  could  get  an  idea 
or  two  for  this  place  by  taking  a  glance  at  my 
garden,  and  I  shall  be  happy  to  escort  you  and 
Mrs.  Hall  to  my  little  place,  if  you  will  go  - 
say  this  evening  —  after  my  day's  work  is  done. 
It  is  not  far  from  here." 

"I  should  be  delighted!"  promptly  replied 
Heloise,  beaming  down  upon  the  young  gar- 
dener in  the  frankest,  most  unsuspicious  man- 
ner. She  had  run  out  of  the  house  without  her 
hat,  as  the  big  tree  where  the  men  ate  their  din- 
ners was  not  far  from  the  kitchen  door.  The 
lower  part  of  her  face  was  a  shade  less  fair  than 
when  she  came  to  Mrs.  Hall's,  but  it  only  served 
to  throw  into  greater  relief  her  lovely  brow  and 
beautiful  white  teeth.  Her  rosy  lips  and 
charming  smile  were  ever  the  same,  and  her  fine 
eyes  had  an  added  brilliancy. 

"  I  will  speak  at  once  to  Mrs.  Hall,  and  if  she 
would  like  to  go  we  shall  be  ready  as  soon  as  tea 
is  finished,"  and  Heloise  went  off  to  the  house. 

Alfred  rushed  after  her  and  caught  up  just 
in  time  to  open  the  door  for  her.  Then  he  said 
pleadingly: 

"Do  not  wait  to  make  tea.     My  father  gets 


REPUBLICAN    ROYALTIES  193 

so  lonesome  nowadays  eating  by  himself,  with 
only  a  Chinese  boy  about.  Let  him  give  us  a 
cup  of  the  real  article  and  a  roll  and  a  fresh-laid 
egg  and  some  strawberries.  It  will  be  a  wel- 
come change  for  him,  I  assure  you!" 

"I  will  ask  Mrs.  Hall  at  once.  Come  with 
me!  We  will  ask  her  together!"  said  Heloise 
impulsively. 

Alfred  needed  no  urging.  He  was  only  too 
glad  to  follow  Heloise  into  the  dismantled  little 
dining-room  where  Mrs.  Hall  was  slowly  drink- 
ing her  coffee.  The  new  nurse,  having  finished 
hers,  was  busy  in  the  parlor,  where  some  paint- 
ing and  varnishing  was  being  done. 

"Dear  Mrs.  Hall,"  began  Heloise,  "Mr. 
Banks,  it  appears,  has  a  very  nice,  well-planned 
garden  of  his  own.  He  thinks  we  could  get 
some  excellent  hints  for  your  grounds  by  seeing 
it,  and  has  kindly  offered  to  take  us  there  this 
evening.  It  is  not  far,  you  know,  and  the  even- 
ings are  gorgeous.  What  do  you  say  ?  Would 
you  like  to  go  ?" 

"And  drink  some  real  Chinese  tea  brewed 
by  a  bona  fide  Chinaman  ?"  put  in  Banks. 

Mrs.  Hall  adjusted  her  glasses  and  gave  the 
two  young  people  a  very  serious  look  before  she 
replied.  She  was  wondering  whether  she  dared 
accept  the  invitation  and  run  the  risk  of  having 
one  of  her  "spells,"  and  spoiling  everybody's 
pleasure. 


194  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

"Oh,  do  let  us  go!"  interposed  Heloise,  com- 
ing to  her  side  and  smoothing  her  hair. 

"Certainly,  if  you  wish.  But  it  is  a  risky 
business  —  taking  me  anywhere.  I  might  scare 
the  old  man  and  the  little  Chinaman  out  of  their 
senses.  The  enemy  is  most  likely  to  seize  me 
whenever  I  am  having  an  unusually  good  time." 

"Fear  nothing,  and  don't  think  about  it!" 
replied  the  young  man,  giving  Mrs.  Hall  one  of 
his  brightest  smiles.  He  was  overjoyed  by  the 
splendid  beginning  he  was  making  for  the  end 
he  had  in  view.  Many  women  he  knew  had 
been  tempted  to  wed  men  they  had  not  greatly 
cared  for  just  to  secure  a  home.  If  he  could 
get  the  woman  he  wanted  even  on  such  terms 
he  would  trust  to  the  future  and  to  his  steadfast 
devotion  to  bring  about  a  return  of  his  loyal 
affection . 

The  hour  appointed  for  the  ramble  having 
arrived,  Alfred  tapped  at  the  front  door,  which 
was  partly  open.  The  hard-working  landscape 
gardener  had  been  transformed  into  an  elegant 
gentleman  of  artistic  tastes,  for  Alfred  carried 
his  love  of  the  arts  into  the  matter  of  personal 
raiment.  He  suggested  the  artist  even  when 
at  work  with  a  hoe,  a  rake,  or  a  spade  in  his 
hands,  and  when  he  was  not  thus  engaged  it 
pleased  him  to  shine  as  a  well-dressed  gentle- 
man, with  a  touch  of  the  artist  in  his  make-up. 
Hence,  he  always  carried  about  with  him  on  his 


REPUBLICAN    ROYALTIES 

trips  a  valise  which  held  either  his  suit  of  work- 
ing clothes  or  his  "society  outfit,"  as  it  was 
popularly  dubbed;  so  that  either  might  serve  his 
purpose  when  he  was  detained  several  days  on 
a  job. 

As  he  tapped  lightly  at  the  front  door,  Helo- 
ise  entered  the  hall  from  the  sitting-room. 
She  smiled  and  begged  him  to  be  seated  in  the 
porch  a  moment  while  she  helped  Mrs.  Hall 
to  don  her  bonnet  and  scarf.  She  herself  was 
attired  in  her  traveling  suit,  plain  garments 
made  of  mourning  material,  without  any  touch 
of  art  or  indeed  of  what  might  be  called  style. 
The  truth  is,  that  Heloise,  while  temperament- 
ally loving  all  things  beautiful,  had  not  yet  given 
much  attention  to  the  art  of  dress,  nor  indeed 
to  many  other  aesthetic  things  wrought  by  the 
hand  of  man.  Thus  far  she  had  been  merely 
a  seeker  of  truth  for  truth's  sake,  and  for  utili- 
tarian rather  than  aesthetic  purposes. 

When  the  two  ladies  joined  Alfred  on  the 
front  porch,  he  greeted  Mrs.  Hall  deferentially, 
as  was  his  habit  with  people  who  had  in  any 
way  an  infirmity  to  bear.  But  on  turning  to 
Heloise  he  gave  her  at  first  a  very  critical  look 
and  then  a  roguish  smile.  She  felt  that  some- 
thing was  wrong  and  blushed  a  rosy  pink. 

"Do  you  know,  Miss  Mills?"  he  said  at 
length,  "that  I  consider  you  a  great  sinner?" 

"Yes,  of  course,  but  of  what  kind  ?     Your 


196  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

eyes  tell  me  that  you  think  me  a  dowdy. "  She 
smiled,  but  she  felt  uncomfortable. 

"Worse  —  a  downright  sinner!  Heaven  has 
given  into  your  keeping  its  most  beautiful  gifts, 
but  you  set  them  aside  as  if  they  were  of  no  value, 
or  you  actually  try  to  conceal  them!  Take 
your  hair:  how  abundant,  how  lovely  the  shade, 
how  full  of  vitality  and  life  it  is,  and  yet,  though 
it  pleads  with  you  for  a  little  freedom  and  artistic 
treatment,  you  draw  it  tightly  back  from  your 
forehead  and  as  tightly  pin  it  in  a  knot  at  the 
back  of  your  head.  And  you  clap  down  over 
your  lovely  forehead  a  plain,  narrow-rimmed 
sailor  hat,  fit  only  for  boys  and  ugly  girls  who 
look  like  boys.  As  a  last  insult  to  your  beauty 
you  wear  a  somber  garment  which  some  woman 
who  has  mistaken  her  calling  has  spoiled  in  the 
making,"  he  protested  as  they  stood  on  the 
porch. 

"They  were  made  by  a  poor  woman  who  has 
the  best  heart  in  the  world.  She  is  a  dear  good 
creature." 

"  Doubtless  she  is  all  that  —  but  she  should 
make  bags,  not  dresses.  She  aims  too  high. 
She  must  be  conceited,  despite  her  goodness  of 
heart." 

"I  am  sorry  my  appearance  does  not  please 
you,"  said  Heloise,  leading  the  way  to  the  gate. 
She  was  surprised  and  somewhat  vexed  by  the 
young  man's  frank  comments,  his  disregard  of 


REPUBLICAN    ROYALTIES 

conventional  manners.  She  had  been  brought 
up  to  look  upon  one's  outside  appearance  as  of 
small  consequence,  compared  with  the  right 
development  of  the  inner  being,  but  being  sen- 
sitive and  having  a  lively  imagination,  she  now 
exaggerated  the  figure  she  was  cutting  in  the 
eyes  of  this  crudely  fastidious  young  man. 

"  Heloise  always  looks  and  is  exquisitely  neat, 
and  that  is  the  important  thing.  I  have  seen 
very  stylishly  dressed  men  and  women  who  were 
not  really  clean,  and  whose  houses  were  actually 
dirty." 

Mrs.  Hall  had  not  relished  the  frank  criticism 
of  her  favorite  and  spoke  more  seriously  than 
the  occasion  required. 

Banks  tried  to  mollify  her  by  saying  with 
energy : 

"My  dear  Mrs.  Hall,  you  must  not  think  I 
am  finding  fault  with  your  lovely  friend.  I 
recognized  her  worth  and  the  rare  type  of  her 
beauty  the  moment  my  eye  fell  on  her,  but  I 
love  to  see  a  beautiful  gem  properly  set.  My 
real  quarrel  is  with  the  dear,  good  creature  who 
has  done  her  best  to  spoil  the  fine,  stately  figure 
of  Miss  Mills,"  insisted  Alfred,  as  they  walked 
on. 

"Ah,  but  if  you  only  knew  this  good  woman, 
Mr.  Banks,"  quickly  responded  Heloise.  "Her 
life  has  been  a  very  pathetic  one.  She  married 
the  man  she  loved  —  he  was  poor  —  and  ac- 


198  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

cepted  his  lot  with  the  grace  of  a  saint.  She 
bore  him  three  sweet  children.  When  the 
youngest  was  a  chubby  bit  of  humanity  and 
had  just  reached  the  age  of  six  months,  her  hus- 
band was  killed  while  at  work.  On  account 
of  some  trifling  carelessness  on  his  part,  she 
could  procure  no  damages.  Their  little  cottage 
happened  to  be  hers.  She  was  obliged  to  mort- 
gage it  in  order  to  bury  her  husband  decently. 
Then  began  her  struggle  for  a  living,  with  un- 
skilled fingers,  with  no  time  for  preliminary 
training,  for  she  was  a  brave,  high-spirited 
woman  and  could  not  bear  to  become  an  object 
of  charity. 

"As  she  wished  to  keep  her  children  with  her, 
she  could  think  of  no  way  of  making  a  living 
but  by  taking  in  sewing  which  some  friends 
undertook  to  procure  for  her.  One  of  her 
friends  appealed  to  me,  telling  me  the  woman's 
story  at  the  same  time.  I  said  I  had  no  plain 
sewing  on  hand,  unless  a  plain  traveling  dress 
could  be  so  classed.  The  lady  looked  me  over 
and  said  she  thought  one  for  me  would  come 
under  that  head!  I  gave  her  my  material  with 
the  result  that  you  see." 

"You  would  have  done  better  to  have  made 
the  woman  a  present  of  the  money  and  sent  your 
gown  to  a  regular  dressmaker,  for  she  has  not 
only  spoiled  your  good  material  but  made  you 
look  countrified.  It  is  not  right!"  —  Alfred 


REPUBLICAN    ROYALTIES  199 

added  suddenly.  "Do  7  look  like  a  clod- 
hopper ?" 

"No,  I  can't  say  that  you  do."  Heloise 
found  it  impossible  not  to  laugh,  for  the  young 
man  seemed  to  await  her  reply  very  seriously, 
as  if  it  were  a  matter  of  great  importance. 

"On  the  contrary,  I  look  like  a  gentleman. 
Is  it  not  true?" 

"It  is,"  repeated  Heloise  demurely,  fearing 
to  give  him  pain  if  she  showed  that  she  did  not 
realize  the  importance  of  a  subject  he  seemed 
to  have  so  deeply  at  heart. 

"And  you  might  look  like  a  queen!  —  if  you 
gave  proper  attention  to  your  clothes!"  he  per- 
sisted. 

"A  society  queen  I  suppose  you  mean,  since 
American  institutions  do  not  permit  us  to  in- 
dulge in  the  real  article.  But  the  question 
arises,  would  it  pay  for  me  to  add  myself  to  the 
already  large  number  of  queens  America  is  at 
present  supporting;  for  you  must  admit  that  a 
multitude  of  queens  is  an  expensive  luxury  for  a 
republic,  especially  as  American  queens  are  not 
satisfied  to  reign  at  home  but  must  try  to  rule  in 
foreign  capitals  at  America's  expense.  You  see  I 
am  a  true  American.  Before  I  indulge  myself  in 
any  caprice  or  yield  to  a  prompting  of  head  or 
heart,  I  have  fallen  into  the  habit  of  asking  my- 
self, 'Will  it  pay?'  Now,  I  can't  see  that  it 
would  pay  either  me  or  the  country  I  love  so 


2OO  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

well  to  become  what  is  called  a  'society  girl.' 
What  do  you  think  ?" 

"Oh,  I'm  not  in  love  with  the  sham  article 
any  more  than  you  are.  As  a  rule  American 
queens  are,  as  you  say,  too  expensive,  too  irre- 
sponsible, a  class  that  our  country  has  often 
reason  to  be  ashamed  of.  I  merely  meant  that 
nature  having  given  you  beauty,  you  should 
aid  and  abet  her  —  you  should  follow  her  cue  - 
or  at  any  rate  not  try  to  thwart  her.  I  beg  your 
pardon  for  being  so  frank!" 

"And  I  beg  yours  for  spoiling  our  little  outing, 
which  was  to  have  been  so  pleasant.  I  should 
have  been  more  considerate  of  your  tastes, 
though  I  have  not  much  of  a  wardrobe  from 
which  to  make  a  selection.  However,  I  think 
this  is  the  most  ill-fitting  and  ogre-like  gown  it 
contains.  You  see  what  a  penalty  you  pay  for 
being  an  artist." 

"  But,  on  the  other  hand,  there  are  compensa- 
tions. Nature  is  an  inexhaustible  source  of  pleas- 
ure, and  men  and  women  are  becoming  more 
artistic  every  day.  Now,  there's  a  pretty  picture 
for  an  artist  to  enjoy!" 

Alfred  pointed  with  his  cane  to  a  young 
woman  who  was  working  among  some  plants  in 
a  field  on  the  opposite  side  of  the  road.  She 
wore  a  garden  suit  of  rough  cloth,  made  in  a 
picturesque  manner,  a  large  coquettish-looking 
hat,  gauntlet  gloves,  and  stout  shoes.  She  was 


REPUBLICAN  ROYALTIES        2OI 

manipulating  a  daintily  made  hoe  in  a  manner 
that  filled  Heloise  with  amazement  —  possibly 
with  a  little  envy  —  as  she  recalled  her  own  big, 
ungainly  hoe,  which  would  persist  in  divorcing 
itself  from  its  handle  whenever  she  got  enthu- 

O 

siastic  over  her  work.  Then  Heloise's  long 
dress  and  skirt  were  always  getting  in  the  way, 
no  matter  how  well  she  pinned  them  up  at  the 
start.  The  comparison  made  her  sigh  as  she 
looked  at  this  woman  —  she  seemed  to  fit  in  so 
well  with  the  landscape! 

"The  woman  looks  almost  as  well  out  of  doors 
with  a  hoe  as  Heloise  does  indoors  with  a  broom 
and  with  her  long  apron  on,  always  so  well 
starched  and  fleckless,"  said  the  loyal  Mrs.  Hall. 

Heloise  colored  slightly.  "I  am  glad  I  look 
well  in  the  house,  since  I'm  such  a  dowdy  on  the 
street.  But  does  it  pay  to  make  a  business  of 
gardening,  as  I  suppose  this  one  is  doing  ?" 

Alfred,  thus  appealed  to,  turned  his  eyes  from 
the  pretty  scene  to  Heloise,  and  after  wrinkling 
his  brow  a  moment  said  rather  hesitatingly: 

"Oh,  some  of  them  make  it  pay  and  some 
don't.  That  woman  we  have  been  watching 
makes  money.  She  sold  about  one  hundred 
and  fifty  dollars'  worth  of  blackberries  alone 
last  season,  from  some  fifty  or  so  plants  she  had. 
On  some  of  her  flowers  she  does  even  better. 
A  new  strain  of  carnation  brings  her  sometimes 
as  much  as  a  dollar  and  a  half  a  dozen  blossoms. 


202  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

Women  out  here  run  all  sorts  of  places,  from 
big  milk  ranches  to  small  plats  of  ground  no 
bigger  than  a  town  lot.  Small  fruit  farming  is 
doubtless  their  safest  investment,  as  the  raising 
of  raspberries,  blackberries,  and  strawberries 
of  the  best  varieties  can  never  be  overdone.  — 
Ah,  here  we  are!  This  is  my  little  place,  and 
father,  you  see,  is  at  the  gate,  waiting  for  my 
return.  Time  hangs  heavily  on  his  hands 
sometimes,  and  I  am  all  that  is  left  to  him  of  a 
rather  numerous  family." 

"Dear  father,"  he  went  on,  "I  have  brought 
you  some  company  to  cheer  you  up  a  little. 
This  lady  is  Mrs.  Hall,  a  near  neighbor  of  ours, 
and  the  young  lady  is  Miss  Mills.  Ladies,  let 
me  introduce  you  to  the  best  father  in  the  world!" 


CHAPTER  XV 

IN   PARADISE 


"THE  revelation  of  God  to  man  is  progressive,  for 
every  fresh  advance  in  knowledge  of  the  world  in 
which  we  live  contributes  to  our  knowledge  of  our 
Maker."  -  W.  T.  Stead. 

"SCIENCE  will  soon  make  the  miracles  of  Christ 
elementary." 

A  RELIGION  which  teaches  the  suppression  of  the 
many  and  the  saving  of  the  few,  is  endorsed  by  political 
measures  which  put  this  religion  into  practice  in  a 
commercial  way.  —  M .  I.  T . 


XV 


In  Paradise 


"T?ATHER  BANKS  "  shook  hands  with  Mrs. 
JP  Hall  in  a  manner  so  dignified  as  to  ap- 
proach stateliness,  and  said  in  his  formal  way: 

"You  are  very  welcome." 

Mrs.  Hall  merely  said  "Thank  you."  Her 
mind  was  troubled.  She  was  thinking  what 
an  incongruous,  undignified,  and  demoralizing 
thing  it  would  be  for  her  to  fall  into  a  fit  in  this 
little  paradise  of  a  garden,  with  the  stately 
"father"  sitting  in  judgment  on  her,  —  she  was 
sure  it  would  be  severe  from  the  set  of  his  fea- 
tures, —  while  the  artistic  son  would  receive  a 
shock  from  which  he  might  not  be  able  to  rid 
himself  for  many  days;  if  indeed  it  would  not 
be  always  a  haunting  memory. 

She  turned  to  Heloise,  and  grasping  her  elbow 
said  in  a  timid  voice: 

"Dear  Heloise,  I  feel  ill.  I  think  I  would 
like  to  return  and  take  some  medicine  which 
always  relieves  me." 

"Certainly!  We  will  return  at  once,"  said 
Heloise. 

This  conversation  was  overheard  by  Alfred, 
205 


2O6  ABELARD   AND    HELOISE 

who  was  so  eager  for  Heloise  to  see  his  gem-like 
home  that  he  promptly  interposed: 

"Dear  Mrs.  Hall,  if  you  must  return,  please 
accept  me  as  your  escort  instead  of  Miss  Mills. 
It  would  be  too  bad  for  her  not  to  see  the  garden 
now  that  she  is  here.  I  will  take  you  in  the 
buggy.  Not  a  word  by  way  of  protest,  Miss 
Mills!  I  am  accustomed  to  have  my  own  way 
in  my  own  place.  Father,  while  you  are  talking 
to  these  ladies,  I  will  help  John  harness  up.  I 
will  be  back  in  five  minutes!" 

Both  Heloise  and  Mrs.  Hall  tried  their  best  to 
get  in  a  word,  but  Alfred  was  away  before  either 
of  them  could  get  under  headway,  and  they 
paused,  feeling  that  it  was  probably  useless  to 
try  to  stop  a  young  man  so  determined,  and  who 
asked  nobody's  leave. 

"I  shall  insist  on  accompanying  you,"  said 
Heloise,  turning  to  Mrs.  Hall. 

"Oh,  Heloise,  there  is  no  need!  though  I  al- 
ways like  to  have  you  with  me.  Somehow  I 
feel  safer.  But  Mrs.  Redmond  is  there  and 
this  young  man  has  set  his  heart  on  showing  you 
his  beautiful  place.  It  would  be  a  pity  to  dis- 
appoint him.  Besides,  I  don't  feel  very  sick." 

The  elderly  Mr.  Banks  left  them  for  a  few 
minutes — thinking  they  might  wish  to  say  a  few 
words  privately,  —  to  pull  off  some  leaves  which 
were  turning  to  an  ominous  yellow  on  a  cherished 
shrub,  and  Mrs.  Hall  embraced  the  oppor- 


IN    PARADISE  2O7 

tunity  and  admitted  that  she  was  not  really  ill, 
only  afraid  she  might  be. 

Then  she  added  with  quite  unusual  vehe- 
mence, "I  simply  can't  bear  the  thought  that  I 
might  any  instant  drop  at  the  feet  of  that  sav- 
age old  man,  and  wake  to  consciousness  with  a 
new  bitterness  in  my  heart.  He  would  secretly 
curse  me  for  daring  to  enter  this  place — I  who 
am  supposed  by  some  to  be  subject  to  a  devil. 
He  is  the  kind  of  person  who  would  very  likely 
think  it,  too.  No,  I  will  not  stay.  I  will  banish 
myself  before  giving  that  severe  old  gentleman 
an  opportunity  to  wish  me  in  purgatory." 

"  I  really  think  I  had  better  go  with  you,"  in- 
sisted Heloise.  "You  might  need  me." 

"We  shall  reach  home  in  a  very  few  minutes. 
The  chances  of  my  enemy  overtaking  me  are 
small.  And  the  young  man  would,  I  am  sure, 
rather  take  this  risk  than  lose  the  delight  of  your 
company  in  his  own  house.  He  wants,  more- 
over, to  hear  you  praise  this  lovely  garden,  which 
is  evidently  very  dear  to  him;  it  is  better  that  you 
remain.  You  will  have  a  lot  to  tell  me  when 
you  return  to-night,  or  in  the  morning,  if  I  hap- 
pen to  be  dozing  when  you  come." 

Before  Heloise  could  reply,  the  one-seated, 
top-covered  buggy  with  its  dashing,  high-spirited 
horse  was  at  the  gate. 

The  old  gentleman  politely  assisted  Mrs.  Hall 
into  it,  and  as  soon  as  she  was  seated  Alfred 


2O8  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

drove  off  at  a  quick  pace,  merely  waving  Heloise 
a  graceful  salute,  and  not  daring  to  stop  to  speak 
with  her.  He  was  desperately  afraid  she  would 
insist  upon  returning  with  her  mistress,  and  he 
was  determined  to  leave  no  loophole  by  which 
she  could  effect  her  purpose.  Once  let  a  pretty 
woman  begin  to  plead  with  a  man  and  that  man 
is  lost,  he  considered. 

Father  Banks  lost  no  time  in  making  the  ac- 
quaintance of  Heloise.  He  really  enjoyed  the 
society  of  young  women,  as  is  apt  to  be  the  case 
with  old  men,  and  he  thought  this  one  a  fine 
specimen  of  healthy,  happy  womanhood;  and 
he  made  up  his  mind  that  if  his  son  had  taken 
"a  shine"  to  her,  he  would  do  all  he  could  to 
help  him  secure  the  prize.  The  place  needed  a 
woman  and  some  prattling  children  to  make  of 
it  a  real  home.  Father  Banks  was  sure  he 
would  make  an  excellent  —  perhaps  even  an 
indulgent  —  grandfather,  as  he  had  made  what 
he  considered  an  excellent  father.  Perhaps  he 
had  erred  on  the  side  of  severity,  but  that  was 
better  than  to  be  so  lax  that  children  would  not 
only  run  over  their  own  parents,  but  everybody 
else,  and  end  in  making  bad  citizens. 

Father  Banks  did  not  immediately  call  Helo- 
ise's  attention  to  the  beautiful  garden,  which 
his  son  and  himself  had  brought  to  the  highest 
state  of  perfection,  but  sought  her  opinion  of 


IN    PARADISE  2O9 

South  California,  "in  which  you  now  find  your- 
self for  the  first  time." 

Her  replies  were  as  enthusiastic  as  he  could 
desire.  She  finished  an  eloquent  little  speech 
of  praise  by  saying: 

"I  think  it  is  not  only  'God's  own  country,' 
but  a  paradise  for  woman,  too.  Everything 
here  coaxes  her  to  do  her  best,  and  in  this  balmy 
air  and  amidst  these  lovely  scenes  her  highest 
development  ought  to  be  reached  —  and  by  her 
side  man  should  attain  his!" 

Silence  fell  for  a  moment  after  this  outburst, 
which  had  surprised  Heloise  herself  no  less  than 
Father  Banks;  for  she  was  not  ordinarily  what 
might  be  called  an  impulsive  or  even  an  en- 
thusiastic person.  The  influences  of  her  life 
had  been  against  that. 

"I  perceive  that  you  are  for  woman's  rights, 
young  lady.  That  is  strange,  because  the  minds 
of  marriageable  girls  are  usually  too  occupied 
with  the  mysteries  of  love  to  care  for  those  of 
politics." 

Heloise  blushed  and  replied  in  a  deprecatory 
manner: 

"I  hope  I  am  no  more  firm  for  the  rights  of 
woman  than  I  am  for  those  of  man.  I  hope  I 
am  no  partisan,  though  I  do  dislike  monopolies 
—  the  monopoly  of  the  weak  by  the  strong  — 
of  the  colored  by  the  white  —  of  the  feminine 
by  the  masculine." 


2IO  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

Just  then  the  sound  of  approaching  wheels 
caused  a  break  in  the  conversation,  and  before 
it  could  be  resumed  Alfred  had  rejoined  them. 

"How  did  you  leave  Mrs.  Hall  ?"  was  Helo- 
ise's  first  question. 

"The  old  lady  seemed  to  be  all  right  after  she 
left  here.  I  think  she  must  have  been  afraid 
of  you,  father.  You  can  look  very  severe.  I'll 
bet  you  were  afraid  she  would  tumble  on  some 
of  your  floral  pets  and  smash  them." 

Father  Banks  smiled  for  the  first  time,  show- 
ing as  he  did  so  a  fine  set  of  "store  teeth." 
Though  much  wrinkled  and  as  brown  as  the  sun 
could  make  him,  he  was  yet  a  clear-eyed,  hand- 
some old  man,  with  just  a  perceptible  stoop  in 
his  tall,  athletic  frame. 

"I  confess  I  can't  endure  an  epileptic.  Such 
people  ought  to  be  kept  out  of  sight.  I  don't 
see  how  a  young  woman  like  you,  Miss  Mills," 
he  said,  turning  to  Heloise,  "can  associate  so 
intimately  with  an  old  creature  who  seems  to  be 
the  sport  of  some  malignant  spirit  —  as  the 
neighbors  say."  Father  Banks  gave  Heloise 
his  most  severe  look. 

That  young  woman  smiled  pleasantly  in  re- 
turn, but  said  nothing. 

"Don't  take  father  at  first  glance  valuation, 
Miss  Mills,"  interposed  Alfred.  "He  lives  so 
much  with  nature  that  bluntness  of  speech  has 
become  second  nature  with  him." 


IN    PARADISE  211 

"Which  only  goes  to  prove  that  every  advan- 
tage is  balanced  by  some  loss.  Even  the  shal- 
low amenities  of  polite  life  serve  as  oil  to  keep 
the  social  machinery  running  smoothly,"  was 
Heloise's  smiling  rejoinder.  Her  imperturbable 
good  humor  seemed  to  act  as  an  irritant  on 
the  old  man.  He  said: 

"Why,  you  must  have  the  nervous  system  of 
an  ox!" 

"Or  the  digestion  of  one,"  put  in  Heloise, 
laughing  merrily.  "  But  seriously,  I  think  men 
and  women  look  upon  physical  infirmities  dif- 
ferently. As  a  rule,  a  mother  loves  her  weakest 
child  the  best.  A  father,  on  the  contrary,  wor- 
ships the  strongest,  the  one  best  adapted  to  'get 
on  in  the  world.'  I  have  not  much  doubt  but 
that  Joseph  liked  Jesus  the  least  of  all  his  sons." 

Father  Banks  had  not  found  much  time  to 
devote  to  religious  culture,  but  early  Sunday- 
school  education  enabled  him  to  express  prompt 
astonishment  at  Heloise's  ignorance  of  the 
fatherhood  of  Christ. 

"How  is  it,"  he  asked,  "that  a  young  woman 
of  your  training  has  missed  instruction  in  what 
might  be  called  essential  truths  ?  I  have  heard 
it  said  that  the  rising  generation  is  frightfully 
and  lamentably  ignorant  of  the  Bible,  and  be- 
coming more  so  every  day,  but  - 

He  hesitated  and  Heloise  finished  the  sen- 
tence for  him,  much  to  the  amusement  of  Alfred. 


212.  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

"You  had  no  idea  anyone  could  be  so  igno- 
rant as  myself?" 

"I  beg  your  pardon  if  I  have  spoken  too 
freely." 

"You  have  not.  I  like  frank  speech.  How- 
ever, I  am  not  quite  so  ignorant  in  some  respects 
as  I  seem.  But  I  have  dared  to  do  a  little  think- 
ing; though  being  a  woman  I  suppose  I 
shouldn't/' 

Again  Alfred  laughed,  while  the  old  man 
looked  puzzled.  The  trio  were  slowly  wending 
their  way  towards  the  house,  near  which  a  de- 
licious repast  was  waiting  for  them,  in  a  rose- 
embowered  summer  house. 

"What  have  you  dared  to  think?"  asked 
Alfred,  seeing  that  his  father  was  afraid  to  pur- 
sue the  conversation  further. 

Heloise  did  not  at  once  reply.  She  feared 
she  might  hurt  the  feelings  of  the  old  gentleman, 
but  as  the  silence  was  becoming  awkward,  she 
stumbled  rather  than  said: 

"Well  —  let  —  me  —  say  —  something  un- 
conventional!—  as  we  are  speaking  frankly  this 
afternoon.  My  observation  has  led  me  to  be- 
lieve that  men  are  not  eager  to  assume  parental 
relations  to  children  born  out  of  wedlock,  even 
when  they  have  good  reason  to  know  that  these 
children  are  bone  of  their  bone  and  flesh  of  their 
flesh.  And  as  to  any  of  them  meekly  playing 


IN    PARADISE  213 

the  part  attributed  to  Joseph  —  I  shall  have  to 
witness  this  altruistic  feat  to  accept  it." 

"You  are  right  as  regards  the  average  man," 
said  Alfred  boldly,  as  he  stepped  aside  to  let 
Heloise  precede  him  into  the  summer  house. 
"Perhaps,"  he  added,  "it  is  easier  to  believe 
that  the  story  of  Christ's  immaculate  concep- 
tion was  the  invention  of  some  dreamy  and  half- 
starved  priest." 

"The  more  modern  amendments  very  likely 
were,"  assented  Heloise.  "But  the  essential 
story  of  the  virgin  mother  and  the  miraculous 
child  has  figured  in  ancient  pagan  religions, 
from  prehistoric  times.  It  seems  to  have  been 
the  most  primitive  of  ideal  religious  concepts  — 
a  reaching  out  to  something  above  the  natural 
—  the  correlation  of  God  and  man,  even  through 
the  flesh.  The  divine  mother  and  child  were 
worshiped  many  ages  before  the  evolution  of 
the  modern  Madonna.  The  dependence  of 
man's  salvation  upon  belief  in  the  miracle  was 
the  only  really  new  thing  in  the  Christian  ver- 
sion of  the  story." 

When  they  all  were  within,  and  Heloise  had 
been  decked  with  roses  off  the  vine,  Alfred 
seated  her  at  one  side  of  the  table,  and  his  father 
opposite  her,  while  he  himself  took  the  end  seat, 
facing  the  open  arch  where  John,  the  Chinaman, 
passed  in  and  out,  in  his  capacity  of  waiter. 


214  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

"I  put  my  father  opposite  to  you  because  he 
is  a  little  deaf,"  Alfred  remarked. 

"I  had  not  noticed  it,"  said  Heloise,  speaking 
a  little  louder  than  was  her  custom. 

"I  am  not  very  deaf  and  if  I  can  see  a  person's 
lips  move  I  have  little  trouble  in  making  out 
what  is  said,  no  matter  how  low  or  indistinct  the 
speech.  I  am  sorry,  though,  to  rob  Alfred  of 
the  pleasure  of  sitting  opposite  you,  for  now  that 
you  have  your  hat  off,  you  are  very  beautiful. 
You  should  never  cover  your  forehead!  " 

"Oh,  it  is  these  beautiful  pink  roses  that  have 
made  the  change.  How  lovely  they  are!  How 
happy  God  must  have  been  when  Nature  first 
produced  something  like  a  rose." 

"And  how  happy  man  must  have  felt  when 
he  first  improved  on  them!"  added  Alfred. 

This  speech  caused  not  a  little  merriment 
while  John  was  helping  the  trio  in  the  most 
bountiful  manner  to  fried  spring  chicken,  and 
new  potatoes  and  peas,  deliciously  cooked  and 
temptingly  served. 

"By  the  way,"  Alfred  continued,  "we  must 
show  Miss  Mills  our  primitive  rose-bush.  We 
keep  one  on  hand  for  several  reasons;  there  are 
some  roses  on  it  now.  It  bears  a  very  simple 
sort  of  flower  containing  merely  one  straggling 
row  of  pink  leaves.  Just  think  for  a  moment 
what  we  gardeners,  from  Adam  to  Alfred,  have 
done  in  this  art  since  man  was  turned  loose  in  a 


IN    PARADISE  215 

wilderness  of  thorns  and  brambles.  I'll  ven- 
ture to  say  the  rose  was  in  that  early  time  almost 
all  thorn.  Now  it  is  nearly  all  rose." 

"  I  do  not  remember  to  have  ever  seen  such 
perfectly  gorgeous  specimens  of  the  rose  family 
as  I  have  since  my  arrival  in  California.  And 
your  fruit  is  not  less  wonderful  than  your  flow- 
ers," smiled  Heloise,  glancing  at  a  side-table 
covered  with  various  kinds  of  fruit,  aJ  perfect 
of  their  kind.  "I  had  thought  of  playing  at 
gardening  myself,  but  now  that  I  see  what  mir- 
acles you  perform  out  here,  and  how  hard  it  is 
for  you  to  hold  on  to  your  gardens,  notwith- 
standing your  miraculous  labor,  I  begin  to  feel 
discouraged.  Mrs.  Hall's  new  nurse  tells  me 
that  the  majority  of  the  people  who  have  done 
the  real  drudgery,  and  who  have  spent,  in  many 
instances,  small  fortunes,  have  either  lost  their 
places  or  have  them  so  deeply  mortgaged  that 
they  are  mere  serfs  of  the  money-lenders." 

"Probably  they  were  poor  financiers,"  said 
old  Mr.  Banks,  and  Alfred,  looking  very  wise, 
quickly  added: 

"You  can  depend  upon  it,  Miss  Mills,  there 
was  a  screw  loose  somewhere.  I  am  sure  you 
can  easily  work  the  kind  of  miracles  we  are  per- 
forming, with  a  little  teaching.  Nature  treats 
everyone  alike,  and  is  most  generous  to  those 
who  approach  her  in  the  right  spirit.  You 
have  only  to  take  the  trouble  to  learn  her 


2l6  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

ways  and  to  humor  her  — as  you  would  a 
woman." 

"Ah!  those  people  of  old  India  who  ap- 
proached Mother  Earth  as  the  greatest  of  divin- 
ities were  wise  in  their  generation,"  replied 
Heloise.  "I  know  that  Nature  is  no  respecter 
of  persons,  and  I  am  sorry  that  man  does  not 
imitate  her.  He  is  a  too  great  respecter  of  per- 
sons, and,  to  judge  by  what  we  see  going  on  about 
us,  he  believes  that  the  world  was  made,  for  the 
benefit  of  the  few  and  the  serfdom  of  the  many; 
and  as  if  that  were  not  enough,  our  religious 
teachers  assure  us  that  even  in  the  next  world 
many  are  called  but  few  are  chosen." 

Helois'e  was  speaking  quite  seriously  and  was 
astonished  to  hear  Alfred  laugh  heartily,  as  if 
what  she  had  been  saying  was  a  huge  joke. 
She  smiled  in  return,  but  looked  at  him  with 
question  marks  in  her  eyes.  Father  Banks  had 
likewise  failed  to  see  anything  funny  in  Heloise's 
remarks,  and  gave  his  son  a  look  of  surprise,  so 
Alfred  grew  serious  as  he  replied : 

"Of  course  I  don't  pretend  to  know  what 
proportion  of  the  human  family  God  is  going  to 
reserve  for  himself  and  what  portion  he  will 
hand  over  to  the  devil,  and  I  doubt  if  God  has 
taken  any  human  being  into  His  confidence  in 
this  matter,  but  for  the  serfdom  of  the  majority 
in  this  world,  I  don't  care  a  cent!  The  people 
are  such  fools.  Get  them  out  of  one  kind  of 


IN    PARADISE  217 

slavery  and  they  tumble  into  another.  To  be 
sure,  these  different  sorts  of  slavery  all  spring 
from  one  system,  that  of  monopoly.  But  so 
long  as  the  people  themselves  are  satisfied  with 
their  old  masters  under  a  new  name,  what  can 
be  done  about  it  ?" 

"They  are  not  satisfied,"  said  Heloise  with 
firmness.  "I  have  yet  to  find  anyone  who  en- 
joys losing  the  liberty  he.  has  once  possessed. 
Take  the  case  of  the  Boers!  Monopoly  has  de- 
prived them  of  their  country,  their  homes,  and 
of  the  freedom  they  had  evolved  for  themselves. 
The  remnant  has  been  permitted  to  return, 
but  henceforth  they  are  evidently  to  play  the 
part  of  agricultural  serfs  to  a  country  which  has 
never  shown  mercy  to  her  agricultural  class. 

"Our  own  people  have  fought  no  less  stub- 
bornly for  liberty  than  the  Boers,  though  not 
against  such  heavy  odds.  In  our  first  struggle 
with  Great  Britain  we  had  the  help  of  France, 
and  with  it  much  more  potent  aid  from  the 
hordes  of  dissatisfied  British  subjects  who  had 
previously  flocked  to  our  shores.  Still,  not- 
withstanding the  desperate  struggles  of  our  fore- 
fathers and  of  our  fathers  in  behalf  of  freedom, 
and  the  oceans  of  blood  shed,  how  is  it  with  us 
to-day  ?  Are  we  in  reality  a  free  people  ?  Is  our 
Government  a  government  of  the  people  and  for 
the  people  ?" 

"  I  think  the  less  we  say  about  our  Govern- 


2l8  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

ment  the  better.  It  is  too  indigestible  a  subject 
to  discuss  at  meal-time.  Have  some  more 
chicken!"  frivolously  responded  Alfred. 

Old  Mr.  Banks,  fearing  that  Alfred  had  not 
spoken  with  proper  respect  of  the  Government, 
or  to  Heloise,  now  interposed. 

"I  read  something  the  other  day  that  struck 
me  as  being  quite  true." 

"Not  in  a  newspaper!"  cried  Alfred,  pre- 
tending to  be  so  astounded  that  his  father  was 
obliged  to  join  Heloise  in  a  hearty  laugh  before 
he  could  go  on. 

"No,  in  a  magazine." 

"Heaven  protect  that  magazine,  and  God 
save  its  editor!" 

"Amen!"  promptly  put  in  Heloise,  still 
laughing. 

"If  you  will  just  keep  quiet  a  few  moments  I 
will  tell  you  what  it  said."  Mr.  Banks  was 
struggling  to  recall  what  he  had  read  which 
struck  him  as  being  altogether  true,  but  Alfred's 
supper  was  making  him  feel  so  good  that  he 
could  not  at  once  suppress  his  gaiety,  and  Helo- 
ise found  it  extremely  difficult  to  maintain  a  dis- 
creet manner. 

"Well  —  I  forget  the  words  —  but  it  spoke 
of  the  monopolist  as  'that  sinister  angel  who 
stands  stationed  at  every  gate  of  Paradise,  warn- 
ing us  away.'" 

"Father,  you're  a  brick  —  to  have  stumbled 


IN    PARADISE  219 

across  a  bit  of  truth  anywhere  during  these 
lying  times.  We  are  without  doubt  slowly 
stewing  in  our  own  juice  with  the  monopolist  as 
chef.  But  sufficient  unto  the  day  is  the  evil 
thereof!  In  the  meantime,  let  us  eat,  drink, 
and  be  merry!  John,  bring  some  tea!" 

"At  every  gate!  Why,  what  progress  we 
are  making,"  remarked  Heloise.  "When  Adam 
was  driven  from  his  garden  only  one  flaming 
sword  was  placed  at  the  east  of  the  garden,  to- 
gether with  some  cherubims  to  guard  the  way 
of  the  tree  of  life.  But  now  every  gate  is  guarded 
by  some  self-appointed  angel,  to  warn  us  away 
altogether." 

"That  only  goes  to  show  how  smart  the 
people  have  become.  Being  barred  out  at  the 
east  gate,  they  tried  to  make  entrance  at  the 
north  gate,  when  of  course  some  sinister  angel 
took  possession  and  put  up  another  flaming 
sword.  Then  the  people  made  a  rush  for  the 
south  gate,  only  to  meet  with  a  similar  expe- 
rience, and  finally  the  west  and  last  gate  has 
been  threatened,  and  a  sinister  angel  has  made 
his  way  there  and  mounted  guard  with  his  sol- 
diers. But  if  it  is  the  western  people  who  are 
leading  the  onslaught  at  the  west  gate,  don't 
borrow  any  trouble  for  the  future  of  mankind, 
for  they  will  not  only  force  the  angel  to  give  up 
his  job,  but  having  effected  their  own  entrance 


22O  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

to  the  tree  of  life,  will  respect  the  rights  of  others 
to  the  same!"  cried  Alfred. 

Old  Mr.  Banks  had  listened  with  the  utmost 
surprise  to  his  son's  remarks,  and  struck  in 
with: 

"You  perceive,  Miss  Mills,  that  my  son  is 
very  sanguine  —  in  fact,  he  is  so  sanguine  that 
all  will  come  out  right  that  he  rarely  takes  the 
trouble  to  vote." 

Alfred  colored  furiously,  and  lost  no  time  in 
attempting  to  defend  his  lack  of  action  as  a 
citizen. 

"To  be  frank,  Miss  Mills,  I  have  not  the  time 
to  study  properly  the  great  questions  of  the  day, 
and  what  is  the  use  of  voting  when  you  are  not 
sure  what  to  vote  for,  or  in  whom  to  place  your 
confidence  ?" 

"In  my  day  we  voted  as  our  favorite  news- 
paper told  us,"  said  Father  Banks. 

"But  nowadays,"  hotly  asserted  the  young 
man,  "we  have  no  means  of  getting  news  ex- 
cept through  capitalistic  sources.  When  one 
suspects  the  purity  of  the  source,  why  drink 
from  the  fountain  ?  What  the  people  need  to 
do  first  is  to  establish  a  free,  non-partisan  press 
of  their  own,  which  will  really  represent  them, 
to  establish  their  own  news  agencies,  and  to 
control  the  necessary  means  of  communication 
throughout  the  world.  That  is  what  they  will 
do  when  they  become  alive  to  their  power. 


IN    PARADISE  221 

Judas  betrayed  one  innocent  man  to  death.  It 
is  possible  to-day  by  the  aid  of  the  press  to  be- 
tray whole  populations  to  destruction.  This 
could  never  be  accomplished  if  truth  were  not 
so  perverted  and  poisoned,  when  a  war  is  being 
worked  up,  for  instance,  as  to  make  people  mad 
with  desire  to  kill  each  other.  It  is  the  truth 
which  makes  us  free.  Free  schools  for  the 
young  cannot  alone  secure  and  maintain  the 
freedom  of  a  people.  The  press  should  tell  the 
truth.  But  enough — !  John,  bring  some  tea! 
I  promised  this  young  lady  she  should  have 
some  of  the  real  article  brewed  in  the  real  way 
by  a  real  Chinaman." 

John  grinned  almost  from  ear  to  ear,  then 
noiselessly  departed.  He  returned  very  quickly, 
bearing  a  tray  with  cups  and  saucers  which  were 
works  of  art  from  his  own  flowery  kingdom, 
together  with  some  whipped  cream  and  sugar. 
The  teapot  he  brought  later. 

Heloise  thought  she  had  never  had  such  a  de- 

O 

lightful  meal  in  her  life,  and  said  so  in  such  a 
sincere,  frank  manner  that  the  two  men  were 
highly  elated  with  themselves  as  housekeepers. 
It  was  easy  to  see  that  they  took  more  pride  in 
playing  the  feminine  role  of  entertainers  than  in 
showing  the  garden. 

Wishing  to  somewhat  restore  their  balance, 
Heloise  said  to  the  Chinaman,  when  he  re- 
appeared: 


222  ABELARD   AND    HELOISE 

"John,  you  are  a  jewel!  I  can't  imagine  what 
these  poor  gentlemen  would  do  without  you." 

John  grinned  again  in  his  broadest  manner, 
and  he  nerved  himself  to  take  advantage  of  his 
prestige  by  saying  with  some  difficulty : 

"Me  likee  Melican  man  —  mucbee!"  then 
ran  towards  the  kitchen  with  swift  steps. 

Heloise  looked  after  the  flying  figure  with  in- 
terest. She  wondered  to  herself  why  he  did  not 
tuck  his  shirt  into  his  trousers  like  "Melican 
man,"  but  aloud  she  said: 

"I  hope  the  American  men  will  like  John 
well  enough  to  treat  him  decently;  though  I  am 
afraid  it  is  too  much  to  expect  that  any  white- 
skinned  people  will  treat  a  dark-skinned  one 
fairly  —  do  by  them  as  they  would  be  done  by." 

"Someone  has  said  —  perhaps  it  was  Bryan 
—  that  'Anglo-Saxon  civilization  has  taught 
the  individual  to  protect  his  own  rights;  Amer- 
ican civilization  will  teach  him  to  respect  the 
rights  of  others.'  And  now  shall  we  look  at  the 
garden  —  if  you  have  quite  finished  your  tea  ?" 
urged  Alfred,  rising. 


CHAPTER  XVI 
A  NEW  ENGLAND  BOULDER 


"THERE  are  abundant  evidences  of  woman  capture 
de  facto  among  peoples  of  the  Aryan  stock.  It  ex- 
isted among  the  ancient  Germans  and,  according  to 
Olaus  Magnus,  the  Scandinavian  nations  were  con- 
tinuously at  war  with  one  another.  .  .  .  The  capture 
of  women  for  wives  is  very  prominent  with  savage  and 
barbarous  peoples  of  the  Semitic  race.  'At  the  time 
of  Mohammed,'  says  Robertson  Smith,  'the  practice 
was  universal '  among  the  Arabs. 

"But  nothing  can  exceed  the  brutal  ferocity  with 
which  sometimes  the  people  of  Israel  supplied  them- 
selves with  wives.  On  one  occasion  the  tribe  of 
Benjamin,  or  rather  the  remnant  of  it  which  had 
escaped  the  sword  of  Israel,  stood  in  sore  need  of 
wives;  but  their  brethren  had  sworn  not  to  give  them 
their  daughters  in  marriage,  nor  could  they  legally 
marry  Gentile  women.  The  difficulty  was  solved  by 
the  wholesale  slaughter  of  Jabez-Gilead,  whose  popu- 
lation yielded  400  virgins."  —  George  Elliot  Howard. 


'i»'aH»^^ 

XVI 


A  New   England   Boulder 

* 

WHEN  Heloise  had  reveled  in  the  beauties 
of  the  garden  until  it  was  too  dark  to  see 
anything  more,  she  gave  her  hand  first  to  Father 
Banks  and  then  to  Alfred,  in  sign  of  departure. 
Alfred  did  not  quickly  part  with  it,  and  he  said: 

"You  intend  to  go  home  alone  ?  —  Not  by  a 
good  deal!  I  don't  often  get  an  opportunity  to 
have  a  moonlight  walk  with  a  beautiful  young 
woman,  and,  by  George!  I  shan't  fail  to  im- 
prove this  one.  See!  the  moon  is  just  rising 
magnificently.  Father,  I  will  see  that  Miss 
Mills  is  properly  escorted.  Don't  sit  up  for  me, 
but  go  to  bed  at  your  usual  hour." 

He  released  the  hand  of  Heloise  to  give  that 
of  his  father  a  nice  little  shake,  and  touched  his 
hat  as  he  left  him. 

As  they  passed  through  the  gate,  he  remarked 
to  Heloise: 

"The  truth  is  that  men  turn  into  women 
as  they  grow  old  and  have  to  be  treated  as  such. 
I  show  my  father  all  the  little  attentions  I  ex- 
pect to  show  my  wife  —  when  I  am  so  fortunate 
as  to  have  one.  We  are  like  lovers,  Dad  and  I." 

Heloise's  heart  warmed  to  him  at  once.     It 


226  ABELARD   AND    HELOISE 

always  pleased  her  to  see  a  son  treat  his  father 
with  respect,  but  to  see  one  add  to  respect  grace- 
ful attentions  and  lover-like  thoughtfulness 
caused  her  no  little  emotion.  She  did  not  be- 
tray her  feelings  however,  either  in  speech  or  in 
manner,  but  said  in  her  usual  serene  tones: 

"I  have  been  assured  that  when  a  man  as- 
sumes the  part  of  Benedict  he  drops  that  of 
lover." 

"  I  don't  believe  it.  At  any  rate  I  shall  not  — 
I  dare  you  to  put  me  to  the  test!  Heloise,  I  am 
desperately  in  love  with  you!" 

Alfred  was  certainly  in  earnest.  He  stopped 
short,  and  made  Heloise  stop  also;  then  took 
possession  of  her  two  arms  in  such  a  man- 
ner- that  she  felt  obliged  to  look  into  his 
glowing  dark  eyes  to  see  what  he  was  likely  to 
do  next. 

"When  you  are  tired  of  forcibly  holding  me 
we  will  walk  on  and  talk  the  matter  over,"  she 
said  at  last,  in  a  mild  tone,  though  inwardly 
somewhat  disturbed. 

"You  are  the  strangest  woman  I  have  ever 
met,"  continued  Alfred,  "I  don't  believe  you 
were  ever  rattled  in  your  life  —  or  in  love!" 
He  snapped  out  the  last  words  savagely,  as  he 
gave  up  the  physical  coercion  part  of  his  love- 
making.  Presently  he  burst  out  again: 

"Oh,  if  only  the  good  old  days  of  woman- 
capture  were  here!  How  quickly  I  would  make 


A  NEW  ENGLAND  BOULDER       227 

sure  of  you  —  even  if  I  had  to  knock  you  down 
first." 

He  stopped  still  once  more  and  again  took 
possession  of  her.  She  felt  his  grasp  of  iron  on 
her  wrists  and  knew  it  was  useless  to  resist. 
Besides,  Heloise  was  not  easily  frightened.  She 
simply  gazed  fearlessly  yet  sympathetically  into 
his  fierce  eyes. 

"Can  you  love  ?"  he  gasped. 

"Yes,  the  truth  is  I  am  deeply  in  love  with  an 
Eastern  man  this  very  minute.  Otherwise  I 
might  easily  learn  to  love  you." 

"Thanks,  but  —  throw  him  over!  Take  a 
man  with  a  future!  Men  of  the  East  are  mere 
money-getters.  They  have  no  time  to  cultivate 
the  things  which  make  life  worth  living.  Here 
men  still  have  good  red  blood  in  their  veins,  and 
big  bodies  to  carry  big  hearts  in." 

Heloise  smiled.  "Everything  grows  big  on 
the  Western  coast  —  even  self-esteem,"  she 
added  sententiously. 

He  had  loosed  his  grip  and  she  moved  away 
a  little,  though  still  facing  him  with  fearless 
front. 

"Deny  what  I  say  if  you  can!"  he  insisted. 
"We  are  the  people  of  the  future." 

"  I  won't  attempt  to  dispute  you  —  but  you 
have  yet  to  prove  your  claim." 

"Bah!"  he  ejaculated,  "what  are  the  Eastern 
men  doing  now  ?  They  are  lying  flat  in  the 


228  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

dust,  worshiping  the  golden  calf  which  they 
have  set  up  as  their  idol." 

"  Let  us  try  to  think  that  they  are  recuperating 
for  a  new  spring.  Remember,  Nazareth  was 
a  place  of  such  poor  repute  that  people  would 
not  believe  it  could  bring  forth  anything  good, 
yet  it  produced  a  great  Reformer.  It  is  a  fact, 
I  believe,  that  the  eastern  side  of  every  con- 
tinent has  done  more  for  religion  than  the  west- 
ern. Our  own  country  is  no  exception.  The 
East  has  already  brought  forth  not  only  some 
world-approved  thinkers,  but  it  has  also  pro- 
duced two  fairly  new  religions,  those  of  Joseph 
Smith  and  Mrs.  Mary  Eddy.  Both,  of  course, 
are  built  mainly  on  the  Bible,  but  the  religions 
of  both  Jew  and  Christian  were  largely  taken 
from  older  sources  —  for  all  religion  is  evolu- 
tion. Let  us  hope  our  East  will  evolve  for  us 
a  third  religion;  one  not  based  on  an  imaginary 
fall  and  an  imaginary  curse,  but  on  the  well- 
proven  Rise  of  Man,  brought  to  pass  from  age 
to  age  through  the  infinite  and  tireless  love  of 
God!" 

"And  you  think  this  Eastern  man  of  yours  is 
going  to  give  the  world  this  new  religion  ?  What 
are  his  views  in  regard  to  marriage  ?  Usually, 
very  religious  men  consider  celibacy  as  holy 
and  wedlock  as  an  unworthy  thing.  Since  you 
have  put  the  continent  between  you,  I  suppose 
he  does  not  believe  in  it,  at  least  for  himself. 


A    NEW    ENGLAND    BOULDER 

Why  don't  you  become  a  nun  ?  Why  do  you 
go  about  the  world  tempting  men  to  fall  in  love 
with  you?"  Alfred  spoke  with  a  rising  bitter- 
ness of  accent. 

Aside  from  this  jarring  man  and  woman,  the 
scene  was  very  beautiftil  and  peaceful.  The 
full-orbed  moon  was  rising  slowly  and  gor- 
geously. The  neighborhood,  with  its  groups 
of  tall  trees  and  shrubs,  its  sweet  flowers  and 
velvet  lawns,  seemed  to  have  sunk  into  a  gentle, 
dreamless  slumber.  Not  a  leaf  stirred,  not  a 
sound  broke  the  perfect  stillness.  Even  the 
tread  of  their  feet  was  muffled  by  the  grass  which 
grew  by  the  wayside.  They  seemed  out  of 
place.  Heloise  felt  the  contrast  and  yearned 
for  the  spiritual  repose  of  the  nature  about 
them. 

She  felt  that  something  must  be  done  to  divert 
the  angry  young  man  by  her  side.  After  a 
moment's  silence  she  said  banteringly: 

"  But  it  is  out  of  fashion  to  fall  in  love  with 
young,  unmarried  women.  In  the  few  novels 
which  I  have  taken  the  time  to  read  lately,  the 
heroes  usually  fell  in  love  with  other  men's  wives. 
How  comes  it  that  you  are  behind  the  times  in 
this  respect  ?  —  you  who  are  in  the  front  rank 
of  gentlemen-farmers  ?" 

"The  men  you  happen  to  read  about  were 
unfortunate  —  and  so  am  I ! "  answered  Alfred, 
despondently. 


230  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

"In  some  instances  it  seemed  to  me  that 
these  heroes  were  the  victims  of  an  unreasonable 
infatuation,  rather  than  inspired  by  a  sane, 
healthy  love." 

"I  suppose  that  means  that  /am  a  victim  of 
an  unreasonable  infatuation?" 

Alfred  emitted  a  sound  intended  for  satirical 
laughter,  but  it  fell  on  Heloise's  ear  more  like  a 
hiss. 

"Yes,  you  are." 

"Then  I  suppose  you  are  the  victimizer?" 

"True,  I  am  the  victirru'zer —  and  at  the 
same  time  as  much  a  victim  as  yourself." 

"Explain!  I  am  not  such  an  adept  in  matters 
of  love  as  you  seem  to  be." 

"Well,  I  have  noticed  that  some  women  and 
some  men  are  the  possessors  of  an  unfortunate 
sort  of  magnetism  that,  not  understood  or  mis- 
understood, is  apt  to  lead  to  dangerous  conse- 
quences. Now,  you  think  you  are  in  love  with 
me- 

"Oh,  Heloise,  how  can  you  doubt!  Good 
God,  I  - 

"Be  patient  while  I  explain  myself."  Hel- 
oise spoke  so  firmly  that  Alfred  was  obliged  to 
desist. 

"Now,  suppose  that  I,  who  have  a  great  ad- 
miration for  you  and  felt  my  heart  warm  im- 
mensely toward  you  when  I  saw  how  tenderly 
you  treated  your  father,  should  accede  to  your 


A    NEW    ENGLAND    BOULDER  23! 

wishes  and  marry  you.  In  five  years  you 
would  find  life  with  me  monotonous,  and  in  ten 
you  would  be  in  love  with  another  man's  wife, 
perhaps.  The  truth  is,  you  are  merely  infat- 
uated with  me." 

"You  do  not  know  what  you  are  saying! 
Oh,  Heloise,  I  dare  you  put  me  to  the  test! 
This  religious  lover  of  yours  does  not  care  for 
you  as  I  do,  else  he  would  part  from  the  belief 
which  separates  him  from  the  woman  he  ought 
to  adore,  rather  than  part  from  the  woman  her- 
self." Alfred  put  his  arms  around  Heloise  and 
drew  her  tightly  to  him. 

She  waited,  as  calmly  and  as  stiffly  silent  as  if 
she  had  been  a  carved  effigy  of  herself,  until  he 
released  her,  and  then  said  with  the  utmost 
earnestness : 

"Yes,  he  cares  for  me  and  he  will  care  for  me 
always." 

"How  do  you  know?  Why  is  it  that  you 
trust  in  the  continuity  of  bis  love  and  attribute 
temporary  infatuation  to  mine?" 

"In  real  love  there  is  a  feeling  of  security 
which  calms  the  soul  and  makes  earth  seem  a 
part  of  Heaven.  Time  plays  no  part  in  true 
love.  Whether  the  lovers  are  together  or  apart, 
their  affection,  resting  as  it  does  on  an  eternity, 
is  ever  the  same,  and  they  are  happy,  knowing 
that  each  is  doing  his  part,  wherever  he  may  be, 
and  that  in  God's  own  good  time  they  will  be 


232  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

together.  In  infatuation  this  is  not  the  case, 
for  the  feeling  of  insecurity,  which  is  a  part  of 
such  love,  makes  for  temporary  madness,  which 
sometimes  becomes  more  than  temporary." 

"Then  you  think  I  am  temporarily  mad  and 
may  become  permanently  so.  Ah,  Heloise, 
have  pity!  Be  merciful  in  your  judgment  of 
me.  Try  me  —  since  that  Eastern  lover  of 
yours  is  too  holy  to  enter  the  marriage  state  on 
his  own  account.  In  heaven  there  is  neither 
marrying  nor  giving  in  marriage." 

"  How  do  you  know  ? " 

"The  Bible  says  so." 

"How  came  the  Biblical  writers  to  know 
more  about  what  goes  on  in  heaven  than  you 
or  I?" 

"The  Word  of  God  says  so  and  Christ  him- 
self said  so." 

"Yes,  he  is  reported  as  having  said  'For  in 
the  resurrection  they  neither  marry  nor  are 
given  in  marriage,  but  are  as  the  angels  of  God 
in  Heaven.'  In  the  time  of  Christ  marriage 
was  still  a  very  materialistic  affair,  and  I  believe 
there  was  some  doubt  as  to  whether  women  had 
souls  or  not.  Christ  did  not  refuse  the  homage 
and  the  material  help  which  a  group  of  women 
lavished  upon  him,  but  he  seemed  to  regard 
marriage  as  a  union  on  a  merely  material  plane. 
Matthew  says  he  spoke  of  a  couple  who  were 
wedded  as  being  no  more  twain  but  one  flesh. 


A  NEW  ENGLAND  BOULDER       233 

Since  the  time  of  Christ  the  evolution  of  civiliza-  * 
tion  has  been  swifter,  and  in  consequence  there 
have  been  many  marriages  of  minds.  Even 
spiritual  marriages  are  occasionally  made  now 
and  are  destined  to  become  more  frequent. 
But,  Alfred,  we  are  home,  and  I  must  bid  you 
good-night,  for  there  is  much  for  me  to  do  before 
I  leave." 

"Oh,  Heioise!  will  you  let  me  go  without  a 
word  ?  a  glance  of  hope  ?  Have  you  no  cam- 
passion  ?" 

Alfred  took  her  hand  in  both  of  his  and  gazed 
imploringly  into  her  calm  eyes. 

"My  dear  friend,  in  less  than  five  years  you 
will  thank  me  for  the  attitude  I  have  maintained 
to-night,"  she  said  firmly,  but  sympathetically. 

"  It  is  not  true!  If  I  prove  to  you  at  the  end  of 
that  time  that  I  am  right,  and  your  Eastern 
lover  is  still  too  holy  to  wed,  and  likely  to  remain 
so,  will  you  be  mine  ?  The  best  of  us  are  liable 
to  make  mistakes.  Give  me  one  word  of  hope ! " 

Heioise  shook  her  head. 

"You  are  enough  to  drive  a  man  mad,"  said 
Alfred,  flinging  her  hand  away. 

"Let  us  not  part  in  anger,  Alfred,  my  dear 
friend.  Do  you  know  how  I  shall  always  re- 
call you  and  what  happiness  the  memory  will  give 
me?" 

Alfred  gave  a  sharp  cry.     "I  don't  want  your 


234  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

memories,  I  don't  want  your  friendship!  I 
want  your  love — you — yourself!" 

"I  shall  always  see  you  as  you  looked  when 
you  pressed  your  old  father's  hand  in  parting 
from  him  to-night,"  she  continued  gently. 

Again  did  Alfred'  sieze  her  hand,  but  this 
time  without  anger,  and,  having  kissed  it  ten- 
derly, he  gave  her  one  sad,  wistful  look,  then 
turned  and  went  down  the  lane.  Many  tears 
fell  by  the  wayside  and  many  more  fell  on  his 
pillow  that  night.  The  man  was  deeply  smit- 
ten. In  him  had  smouldered  a  certain  sort  of 
passion  which  something  in  Heloise's  person- 
ality had  caused  to  burst  into  flame.  Without 
giving  the  situation  the  serious  thought  of  a 
more  mature  man,  he  had  nerved  himself  to 
approach  her  with  the  air  of  a  conquering  hero; 
he  had  tried  to  carry  her  by  storm,  but  he  found 
that  all  the  forces  he  could  summon  made  no 
more  impression  upon  her  anchored  soul  than 
do  the  ocean  waves  that  beat  upon  a  New  Eng- 
land boulder. 


CHAPTER  XVII 

A  PILLAR  OF  THE  CHURCH 


Go,  stalk  the  Red  Deer  o'er  the  heather3 

Ride,  follow  the  Fox  if  you  can! 
But  for  pleasure  and  profit  together, 

Allow  me  the  hunting  of  Man  — 
The  chase  of  the  Human,  the  search  of  the  Soul 

To  its  ruin  —  the  hunting  of  Man." 

The  Old  Sbikarri. 


XVII 


A  Pillar  of  the  Church 


ABEL  gradually  gained  strength  enough  to 
leave  his  chamber,  and  although  many  of 
his  people,  when  they  saw  his  pale,  emaciated 
face,  and  observed  his  feeble  gait,  declared  that 
his  work  on  earth  was  done,  he  surprised  them  one 
Sunday  by  again  taking  his  place  in  his  pulpit. 
During  his  illness  and  long  confinement  he  had 
received,  he  felt  sure,  some  new  glimpses  of  the 
truth,  and  he  wished  to  bear  witness  to  them  be- 
fore he  left  for  his  vacation.  This  duty  he  felt 
the  more  keenly  incumbent  upon  him  because  of 
the  supine  attitude  he  had  been  in  mentally 
since  the  great  change  had  begun  to  work  within 
his  soul.  He  recalled  his  position  at  the  death 
bed  of  Mr.  Mills,  where  pity  for  the  creed- 
bound  soul  departing  hence  had  kept  him  silent. 
His  mind  reverted  often  to  the  day  that  Mrs. 
Symonds  called  him  to  her  and  made  him  the 
confidant  of  her  unspeakable  agony  of  soul. 
He  recalled  with  a  sort  of  spiritual  shame  his 
helplessness  on  that  occasion;  when  the  fear  of 
seeming  to  be  faithless  to  the  creed  he  had  al- 
ways professed  had  struggled  with  the  larger 
light  within  him,  and  held  him  silent  while  the 


238  ABELARD   AND    HELOISE 

brave  mother-soul  of  the  woman  had  broken 
the  bounds  of  custom  and  cant  and  had  laid 
hold  on  such  straws  of  spiritual  aid  as  chance 
had  wafted  her  way. 

To  be  sure,  in  the  time  which  remained  to 
him  Abel  could  do  little  more  than  give  his  dea- 
cons a  shock  or  two  and  set  his  congregation  to 
thinking.  But,  come  what  might,  he  would 
improve  the  time  that  was  left  and  use  it  with 
courage  and  fidelity. 

He  took  for  his  text  the  first  Sunday  after  his 
return  to  his  pulpit  the  tenth  and  eleventh 
verses  of  the  twenty-second  chapter  of  Reve- 
lations: 

"And  he  saith  unto  me,  Seal  not  the  sayings  of  the 
prophecy  of  this  book:  for  the  time  is  at  hand." 

"He  that  is  unjust,  let  him  be  unjust  still:  and  he 
that  is  filthy,  let  him  be  filthy  still:  and  he  that  is 
righteous,  let  him  be  righteous  still:  and  he  that  is 
holy,  let  him  be  holy  still." 

From  these  verses  Abel  preached  on  the  fal- 
libility of  mankind.  In  addition,  he  related 
to  his  congregation  curious  little  experiences  he 
had  had  during  his  last  illness;  how  it  seemed 
to  him  that  he  was  caught  up,  like  the  Apostle 
Paul,  into  Paradise.  There  being  no  prohibi- 
tion in  his  case  as  to  relating  what  he  saw  and 
heard  in  this  retreat  for  human  spirits,  he  pro- 
ceeded with  a  wealth  of  poetical  language  and 


A   PILLAR   OF   THE    CHURCH  239 

exquisite  imagery  to  give  his  congregation  as 
complete  a  picture  as  possible  of  what  this  par- 
ticular Paradise  he  had  seen  was  like  and  of 
the  employment  of  the  beings  he  found  there. 
He  repeated  some  amusing  conversations  he 
had  held  with  various  shining  ones  in  connec- 
tion with  the  creed  which  he  had  taken  for 
granted  was  as  familiar  to  them  as  to  himself. 
It  appeared  from  the  responses  they  made  that 
they  were  totally  ignorant  of  this  wonderful 
human  production,  and  regarded  it  as  the  work 
of  children  learning  their  "A  B  C's"  in  com- 
parison with  the  stupendous  facts  of  Nature 
and  of  Nature's  God. 

Naturally,  the  people  marveled  at  this  ser- 
mon of  their  pastor,  and  the  more  they  conned 
the  sayings  of  one  hitherto  so  orthodox  the  more 
their  astonishment  grew;  while  the  good  dea- 
cons not  only  marveled,  but  were  enraged  at  the 
idea  that  their  own  minister  should  lay  claim 
to  having  had  an  experience  similar  in  some 
respects  to  that  of  the  Apostle  Paul.  It  was 
outrageous,  scandalous!  but  they  would,  never- 
theless, give  him  sufficient  rope  to  hang  himself. 
They  would  let  him  preach  the  following  Sun- 
day, as  he  had  announced  he  would  do.  After 
that,  if  he  continued  his  erratic  course  —  well, 
he  ought  to  be  tarred  and  feathered  and  ridden 
out  of  the  country  on  a  rail.  Orthodoxy 


24O  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

would  see  to  it  that  wherever  he  went  church 
doors  would  be  slammed  in  his  face. 

When  Abel's  mind  was  once  made  up  to  do 
a  thing  he  went  about  it  thoroughly.  He  in- 
tended to  show  his  people  once  and  for  all  that 
he  no  longer  held  to  the  infallibility  of  the  Bib- 
lical writers,  any  more  than  he  held  to  that  of 
the  Pope.  He  had  already  dealt  several  sturdy 
blows  in  his  last  sermon;  it  now  remained  for 
him  to  cap  the  climax  by  choosing  his  text  from 
an  American  writer  whom  he  believed  to  be 
quite  as  earnest,  and  much  more  sane  (and  not 
a  little  wiser),  than  most  of  the  Jewish  writers 
whose  sayings  were  embalmed  in  the  pages  of 
the  Old  and  the  New  Testament. 

The  author  so  distinguished  was  Emerson, 
and  the  text  he  chose  from  this  newest  testa- 
ment of  the  times  was  as  follows : 

"God  screens  us  evermore  from  premature  ideas. 
Our  eyes  are  holden  so  that  we  cannot  see  things  that 
stare  us  in  the  face  until  the  hour  arrives  when  the 
mind  is  ripened  —  then  we  behold  them,  and  the  time 
when  we  saw  them  not  is  like  a  dream." 

The  fact  that  the  sermon  was  a  beautiful  and 
instructive  one  only  added  fuel  to  the  flames. 
Indeed,  the  men  in  authority  were  so  beside 
themselves  with  anger  that  they  not  only  in- 
sisted on  Abel's  immediate  resignation,  but  de- 
clared that  he  should  not  have  a  cent  of  the 


A    PILLAR   OF   THE    CHURCH  24! 

money  that  the  women  had  raised  in  order  that 
he  might  have  his  much-needed  vacation. 

The  women,  however,  having  obtained  the 
money  only  by  hard,  exhausting  toil  —  which 
had  laid  some  of  them  on  sick  beds  for  days  — 
thought  that  they  ought  to  have  a  word  to  say 
about  the  disposition  of  these  funds.  They 
hold  a  meeting  and  prepared  some  resolutions 
to  this  effect.  Unfortunately,  the  money  had 
been  already  paid  into  the  hands  of  the  treas- 
urer of  the  church,  and  was  therefore  subject 
to  the  control  of  a  certain  group  of  men  who 
were  ultra-orthodox.  These  men  insisted  that 
they  had  all  had  a  hand  in  raising  the  money, 
and  that  furthermore  it  had  been  collected  for 
the  restoration  to  health  of  a  minister  pledged 
to  the  propagation  of  the  orthodox  faith  in  its 
purity.  Rev,  Abel  was  now  showing  himself 
to  be  a  mouthpiece  of  the  devil,  and  it  would  be 
scandalous  to  assist  him  in  his  diabolical  work. 
As  for  the  women  who  had  drafted  the  resolu- 
tion claiming  authority  in  the  church,  and  who 
desired  to  use  that  authority  as  Eve  had  used 
hers,  to  degrade  man  and  subject  him  to  the 
wiles  of  the  Evil  One,  they  would  turn  a  deaf 
ear  to  their  petitions  and  resolutions. 

The  women  appointed  Mrs.  Symonds,  upon 
whom  had  fallen  the  brunt  of  the  labor  in  con- 
nection with  the  raising  of  a  thousand  dollars  of 
the  amount,  and  her  new  daughter,  who  had 


242  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

given  five  hundred  dollars  out  of  her  own 
pocket,  to  call  upon  the  leading  deacon  and 
give  him  a  piece  of  their  minds. 

They  called  at  his  place  of  business  and  found 
him  at  leisure,  for  he  was  not  much  of  a  business 
man.  Indeed,  his  chief  occupation  was  that  of 
a  "pillar  of  the  church,"  and  he  had  the  reputa- 
tion of  being  an  expert  who  could  scent  hetero- 
doxy when  it  was  afar  off. 

Deacon  Bray  was  of  the  opinion  that  one  can 
poison  one's  mind  as  easily  and  as  disastrously 
as  one  can  poison  one's  body.  Nothing  could 
have  induced  him  to  read  a  book  tainted  with 
heterodoxy.  The  fear  of  receiving  poison  into 
his  moral  system  was  so  great  that  he  read  little 
more  than  the  Bible  and  the  books  upon  which 
orthodoxy  had  set  its  stamp.  As  for  works  of 
science,  so-called,  he  eschewed  them  utterly; 
likewise  the  daily  papers  with  their  big  Sunday 
editions. 

Having  seated  Mrs.  Symonds  and  her  daugh- 
ter and  passed  the  compliments  of  the  day  with 
them,  the  deacon  resumed  his  chair  near  his 
desk,  on  which  was  a  pamphlet  containing  the 
Sunday-school  lesson  for  the  approaching  Sab- 
bath, spread  open  near  his  pocket  Bible  and  a 
big  concordance.  Women  "strictly  orthodox" 
the  deacon  was  fond  of,  but  those  tainted  or 
even  scented  with  heretodoxy  he  had  no  use  for, 


A    PILLAR    OF    THE    CHURCH  243 

regarding  them  as  "dangerous,"  if  not  "of  the 
devil." 

For  some  little  time  he  had  been  viewing 
Mrs.  Symonds  as  a  "dangerous"  woman.  He 
accordingly  gave  her  a  severe  look  as  she  began 
to  explain  the  object  of  her  call.  When  she  had 
finished  he  said  tersely: 

"  Sister,  let  us  pray  over  this  matter,  that  we 
may  see  the  truth  as  it  is  in  Jesus  Christ." 

The  trio  were  seated  in  the  second  and  back 
room  of  the  deacon's  suite,  which  was  quite  free 
from  intrusion.  It  was  a  room  where  he  fre- 
quently prayed  with  sinners  and  held  all  kinds 
of  consultation  on  matters  pertaining  to  religion. 

Both  ladies  were  dressed  in  deep  mourning, 
and  looked  very  sad.  Inez  would  have  ac- 
ceded to  the  deacon's  desire,  from  the  constant 
habit  she  had  formed  of  being  deferential  and 
polite  to  her  elders,  but  Mrs.  Symonds  laid  a 
restraining  hand  on  her  arm  as  she  said  in  a 
dignified  manner: 

"We  are  not  here  to-day  to  learn  the  truth  as 
it  is  in  Jesus  Christ.  We  are  here  to  seek  jus- 
tice. We  have  labored  day  and  night  for  some 
weeks  past  to  raise  money  in  order  that  our 
minister,  who  is  nearly  dead  in  our  service, 
should  have  the  means  to  secure  recuperation 
placed  at  his  command.  We  have  succeeded 
in  raising  fifteen  hundred  dollars,  as  I  stated  a 
moment  ago.  Will  you  not  use  your  influence 


244  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

to  get  this  money  paid  promptly  into  the  hands 
of  our  dear  pastor  ?  That  is  the  question  I 
should  like  an  answer  to,  here  and  now." 

The  deacon  fidgeted  in  his  chair.  He  was 
ill  at  ease.  He  liked  best  to  settle  things  by 
prayer,  since  not  only  himself  but  a  good  many 
others  considered  that  he  was  gifted  in  that  re- 
spect. In  speech  he  was  apt  either  to  be  slow 
and  hesitating  or  to  get  excited  and  call  names 
—  which  practice  might  be  Biblical  but  did  not 
tend  to  convince  an  opponent.  He  began  in 
his  usual  clumsy,  hesitating  manner: 

"  Mrs.  Symonds  —  it  is  —  always  —  hard  to 
reason  with  —  a  woman.  She  will  listen  to 
many  things  of  evil  report  —  with  a  credulous 
ear  —  but  she  has  not  a  mind  —  capable  —  of 
distinguishing  between  right  or  wrong  —  or 
things  reasonable  —  or  unreasonable.  Now  in 
respect  to  this  money  —  we  have  all  helped  to 
raise  it  —  to  propagate  the  truth  as  it  is  in  Jesus 
Christ - 

"  May  I  ask  how  you  helped  to  raise  it  —  you 
and  the  rest  of  the  men  ?" 

"We  have  attended  your  entertainments  - 
and  patronized  your  dinners.     Otherwise  your 
receipts  would  have  been  small." 

"And  you  got  your  money's  worth,  did  you 
not  ?  When  have  you  had  such  a  bountiful 
supply  of  food  for  so  little  money  as  at  our  din- 
ners?" 


A    PILLAR    OF    THE    CHURCH  245 

"That  is  not  the  point  —  as  to  whether  we 
got  our  money's  worth.  The  point  is  —  what 
was  that  money  raised  for  ?  —  The  re-establish- 
ment of  the  health  of  a  preacher  in  order  that  he 
might  continue  his  —  ministrations  —  in  an 
orthodox  church  — ' 

"It  was  raised,"  rather  rudely  interrupted 
Mrs.  Symonds,  "to  give  a  much-needed  vaca- 
tion to  the  Reverend  Abel  Allen  - 

"Who  has  turned  out  to  be  a  wolf  masquerad- 
ing as  a  sheep  until  he  saw  fit  to  throw  off  his 
disguise!"  The  deacon  was  beginning  to  get 
excited,  and  dropped  his  hesitating  manner  of 
speech. 

"  So  our  dear,  gentle  pastor  is  a  wolf  !  Pray 
when  did  you  arrive  at  this  conclusion  ?  Has 
he  been  snowing  you  his  teeth,  or  snarling  at 
you,  or  trying  to  devour  you  ?  Come,  give  us 
your  reasons  for  believing  this  to  be  the  case, 
you  who  claim  a  monopoly  of  the  reasoning 
faculty." 

"I  say  he  is  a  wolf,  a  thief,  a  robber!  He 
steals  into  the  orthodox  fold,  pretending  to  be 
one  of  the  elect,  and  when  he  has  stolen  the 
hearts  of  the  people  so  that  he  thinks  he  can  do 
what  he  likes  with  them,  he  begins  to  play  the 
part  of  serpent,  though  to  some  he  still  appears 
as  an  angel  of  light.  You  seem  to  be  among 
the  members  who  would  follow  him  to  hell." 

The  deacon  darted  a  look  of  what  he  himself 


246  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

would  have  called  "righteous  anger'*  full  into 
the  astonished  countenance  of  the  unreasoning 
Mrs.  Symonds.  Her  daughter  took  no  part  in 
the  excited  conversation  and  merely  looked 
amused. 

"Well,  I  would  greatly  prefer  taking  my 
chances  with  him  than  with  you,  and  your  vin- 
dictive Jehovah  and  your  stupid  Heaven,  both 
a  conception  of  the  unenlightened  human 
brain." 

"It  is  nothing  new  for  women  to  prefer  the 
company  of  the  serpent  to  that  of  the  righteous 
Jehovah,"  said  the  deacon  sarcastically.  Then 
he  added  in  a  pompous  manner,  "But  I  may 
as  well  give  you  to  understand  that  we  shall 
lose  no  time  in  bringing  matters  to  a  crisis. 
The  man  must  go  and  go  quickly.  The  quicker 
the  better  for  the  safety  of  the  flock." 

"  But  you  will  surely  not  cast  him  adrift  with- 
out a  cent  in  his  pocket,  and  of  course  the  furni- 
ture in  the  three  rooms  and  the  things  in  the 
museum  are  his." 

"When  Adam  changed  his  religion  and  chose 
to  believe  Satan  instead  of  God,  he  was  driven 
into  the  wilderness  without  being  permitted  to 
take  anything  away  with  him." 

"Not  even  his  fig-leaf  apron  ?" 

"They  both  doubtless  wore  away  the  evi- 
dences of  their  guilt.  We  shall  not  take  away 
the  Rev.  Allen's  garments,  clerical  or  otherwise, 


A   PILLAR   OF   THE   CHURCH  247 

though  if  he  had  his  just  deserts  he  would  be 
deprived  of  them  and  drummed  out  of  town. 

"Or  hung  on  a  cross,  I  suppose,  if  the  times 
were  as  brutal  as  those  of  Christ.  I  would  like 
to  call  your  attention  to  the  fact  that  of  the  fif- 
teen hundred  dollars  raised,  five  hundred  were 
subscribed  and  subsequently  paid  into  the 
church  treasury  by  my  daughter  here.  She  is 
not  orthodox,  and  she  did  not  give  it  to  propa- 
gate that  belief.  She  gave  it  for  the  benefit  of 
a  good  and  gentle  Christian  whose  health  had 
been  wrecked  in  the  ministry.  Surely  you  will 
not  refuse  to  turn  that  sum  over  to  the  person  to 
whom  it  was  given,  and  to  whom  it  rightfully 
belongs  ? " 

The  deacon  rose  and  began  to  readjust  his 
ink  bottle  and  pens  and  made  a  feint  as  if  he 
wished  to  attend  to  some  pressing  business 
matter.  When  he  had  pulled  out  a  couple  of 
ominous-looking  documents  from  one  of  the 
drawers  of  his  desk,  he  replied  stiffly: 

"That  course  would  be  impossible.  If  we 
returned  one  person's  money  there  would  be 
others  wanting  the  same  thing.  We  are  de- 
termined to  keep  everything  in  connection  with 
this  crisis  in  our  church  as  close  as  possible.  It 
is  the  duty  of  the  women  to  stay  at  home  and  keep 
their  mouths  shut.  As  for  the  men,  those  in 
authority,  they  will  do  what  is  for  the  best  in- 
terest of  the  church  and  of  orthodoxy." 


248  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

"Does  the  minister  know  he  is  not  to  have 
this  money  that  the  sisters  have  raised  for  him  ?" 

"  He  knows  what  it  is  right  he  should  know," 
said  the  deacon  in  a  dignified  manner. 

"I  take  it  that  he  has  resigned,"  remarked 
Mrs.  Symonds,  rising.  Her  daughter  also  rose. 

"Yes,  he  has  resigned  and  his  resignation 
has  been  accepted." 

"So  quickly?" 

"We  have  given  him  plenty  of  rope  with 
which  to  hang  himself.  So  far  as  orthodoxy 
is  concerned  he  is  henceforth  as  dead  as  a  nail. 
He  has  probably  exhibited  the  new  light  he 
claims  to  have  received  for  the  first  and  last 
time.  He  is  quite  ill." 

"And  penniless,  I  suppose." 

"Worse!    In  debt."     The  deacon  chuckled. 

"Ah,  Inez,  let  us  go  and  see  how  it  is  with 
this  gentle  follower  of  the  lowly  Christ.  I  wish 
you  good-morning,  Deacon  Bray." 

"Good-morning,"  repeated  the  deacon, 
stiffly,  resuming  his  seat  and  leaving  the  ladies 
to  find  their  way  through  his  rooms  unattended. 


CHAPTER  XVIII 

A  CURE  FOR  THE  BLUES 


"HE  who  always  speaks  the  truth  will  find  himself 
in  sufficiently  dramatic  situations."  —  Lacon. 


XVIII 


A  Cure  for  the  Blues 


WHEN  Abel  made  up  his  mind  to  preach 
what  he  considered  to  be  new  truth,  he 
foresaw  what  the  step  would  cost  him.  He  real- 
ized that  he  would  see  hatred  in  many  counte- 
nances where  formerly  there  had  been  love,  and 
that  he  would  be  subjected  to  many  humiliations. 
He  did  not  foresee,  however,  the  vindictiveness 
with  which  certain  of  his  deacons  would  stab 
him  not  only  in  his  heart  but  in  his  back  as  well. 

Perhaps  it  was  just  as  well  that  the  excite- 
ment, in  his  weak  condition,  brought  on  a  re- 
lapse of  his  illness,  and  that  physical  prostra- 
tion supervened  for  three  days  and  two  nights, 
as  it  gave  him  a  respite  from  the  deadlier  kind 
produced  by  mental  tension.  The  third  day 
of  his  illness  was  drawing  to  a  close  when  Mrs. 
Symonds  and  Inez  called.  Although  many  of 
his  people  who  stood  by  him  had  come  to  the 
house  to  see  him,  no  one  had  been  admitted 
since  the  new  doctor  had  taken  possession  of 
him,  together  with  a  nurse  whom  he  had  brought 
there  immediately  after  his  first  call. 

The  doctor  was  a  scientific  man,  who  did  not 
care  whether  mankind  had  fallen  with  Adam  or 


252  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

whether  it  had  begun  a  new  era  of  expansion 
when  Cain  went  forth  with  branded  forehead. 
Some  parts  of  the  Bible  he  thought  very  good 
and  some  very  vile.  He  was  sure  of  one  thing, 
and  that  was  that  the  ancients  knew  little  of  the 
human  body,  and  that  their  treatment  of  the 
sick  was  childish,  when  it  was  not  brutal.  He 
liked  Abel  as  a  man,  but  even  if  he  had  not  he 
would  have  done  all  in  his  power  to  bring  him 
relief  from  pain  and  restore  him  to  health  at  the 
earliest  possible  time.  In  short,  he  was  an  ex- 
cellent specimen  of  the  up-to-date  scientific 
medical  practitioner. 

The  nurse  was  doubtful  when  Mrs.  Symonds 
insisted  that  it  was  most  important  that  she  and 
her  daughter  be  allowed  to  see  Abel,  but  she  re- 
turned with  the  message  that  they  would  be 
very  welcome. 

Mrs.  Symonds  was  the  first  to  take  the  min- 
ister's out-stretched  hands  and  offer  her  sym- 
pathy, and  her  daughter  followed.  After  the 
greetings  were  exchanged  the  older  woman  ap- 
proached Abel  and  said: 

"  Bear  with  me  a  moment  while  I  talk  a  little 
business  —  just  a  little.  My  daughter  and  I 
are  eager  to  cooperate  with  the  members  of 
your  congregation  in  making  you  well;  all 
have  given  something,  even  though  the  poorest 
have  had  to  contribute  their  share  in  loving 
words.  Material  help  is  necessary  in  this 


A   CURE    FOR   THE    BLUES  253 

world  where  the  spirit  is  wedded  to  the  flesh,  so 
please  allow  us  to  add  this  to  what  they  have 
given." 

As  Mrs.  Symonds  finished  speaking,  she 
handed  the  minister  a  cheque  for  fifteen  hun- 
dred dollars.  The  minister  held  the  folded  slip 
in  his  thin  fingers  for  a  moment,  then  opened  it 
and  glanced  at  it.  As  he  did  so,  a  slight  flush 
passed  over  his  pallid  countenance. 

"Dear  sister,  I  have  already  refused  this 
money.  I  pray  you  not  to  ask  me  to  accept  it. 
It  appears  the  matter  is  causing  friction  among 
the  people,  and  I  would  rather  not  have  any- 
thing to  do  with  money  which  is  not  freely 
given." 

"Please  read  the  signature  at  the  bottom  of 
the  cheque,  and  you  will  see  that  it  comes  from 
a  different  source  than  from  what  you  think." 

Abel  tried  to  read  the  name  but  found  it  im- 
possible to  make  it  out. 

Inez  laughed  and  said,  "  I  am  a  poor  scribe, 
but  present  the  cheque  at  the  proper  place  and 
you  will  find  that  it  is  cash-trustworthy." 

"Then  this  has  nothing  to  do  with  the  fifteen 
hundred  dollars  raised  lately  by  the  women  of 
the  church  ?" 

"Nothing!"  exclaimed  both  women  at  once. 

O 

Mrs.  Symonds  added,  "It  is  the  West  in  the 
person  of  my  daughter  which  gives  you  this  sum 
in  return  for  benefits  received.  She  thinks  that 


254  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

your  sermons  have  done  her  unspeakable  good. 
She  begs  you  to  accept  it  as  a  contribution 
toward  your  vacation  expenses.  She  will  be 
offended  if  you  refuse  it." 

Seeing  Abel's  hesitation,  the  ladies  had  be- 
come a  little  importunate. 

"  So  it  is  California  that  is  furnishing  me  this 
goodly  sum  ?  Well,  I  accept  it  gladly,  and  I 
shall  lose  no  time  in  hastening  thither  to  see 
with  my  own  eyes  what  that  famed  country  — 
Los  Angeles  —  is  like.  A  thousand  thanks  for 
your  generous  present!"  said  Abel  enthusiasti- 
cally to  Inez,  but  with  the  image  of  Heloise,  only 
Heloise  —  whom  he  was  now  so  soon  to  see!  — 
before  him. 

Abel  held  out  his  hand,  and  Inez,  blushing 
brightly  with  pleasure,  put  her  daintily  gloved 
palm  in  his.  He  pressed  it  warmly,  for  her 
much-needed  and  generous  gift  had  touched 
him  deeply.  He  added  quickly,  however: 

"You  have  given  me  this  money  for  a  specific 
purpose,  but  I  hope  you  will  not  be  displeased 
if  I  help  some  of  my  poor  and  adjust  a  few  mat- 
ters which  require  attention  before  I  leave  the 
city." 

"  Certainly  not !  Only  don't  give  it  all  away, 
but  use  some  to  get  well  on,"  said  the  happy  Inez. 

"As  my  vacation  bids  fair  to  be  an  extended 
one,  I  shall  be  most  economical,  I  can  assure 
you." 


A   CURE    FOR  THE    BLUES  255 

"One  word  more  before  we  go."  It  was 
Mrs.  Symonds  who  spoke,  advancing  as  she  did 
so  quite  close  to  Abel's  bed-side;  Inez  retreating 
meanwhile. 

"Yes,  one  word  more,"  repeated  Mrs.  Sy- 
monds, "while  you  have  strength  to  listen." 

"As  many  as  you  like,"  joyfully  replied  Abel, 
placing  another  pillow  under  his  head  before 
Mrs.  Symonds  could  assist  him.  "You  see  I  am 
getting  well  fast.  I  shall  be  up  in  a  day  or  two. 
Mrs.  Symonds,  it  is  not  often  that  a  preacher 
who  dares  step  off  the  approved  platform, 
guarded  as  it  is  by  an  Argus-eyed  army  of  dea- 
cons, gets  off  as  easily  as  I  have." 

"  It  is  a  wonder  they  did  not  denounce  you  in 
some  public  manner,  or  insist  on  a  church  trial 
or  investigation  of  some  sort,"  said  Mrs.  Sy- 
monds. 

"If  I  had  not  promptly  sent  in  my  resigna- 
tion I  suppose  they  would  have  done  so.  Dea- 
con Bray  would  have  liked  nothing  better.  As 
it  happened,  the  only  way  in  which  they  could 
punish  me  was  to  retain  the  money  raised  for 
my  vacation  expenses." 

"You  let  them  do  it  without  a  protest,  I  sup- 
pose." 

"Not  only  so,  but  I  was  the  first  to  suggest 
that  it  be  withheld.  It  was  really  raised  by  an 
orthodox  people  for  the  benefit  of  an  orthodox 
preacher." 


256  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

"You  forget,"  protested  Mrs.  Symonds, 
"that  it  was  the  women  who  raised  the  money, 
and  that  they  raised  it  for  your  personal  benefit 
—  just  as  Mary  broke  the  box  of  precious  oint- 
ment for  the  benefit  of  the  Master.  I  doubt  if 
women  care  for  the  orthodox  machinery  of  the 
church.  All  the  women  of  our  church  —  so  far 
as  I  can  ascertain  —  want  you  to  have  the 
money." 

"So  they  still  stand  by  me!"  exclaimed  Abel 
with  visible  emotion.  "You  must  tell  them 
how  grateful  I  am.  They  have  been  my  chief 
support.  I  can  never  forget  their  goodness, 
and  the  thought  that  my  new  belief  parts  me 
from  such  a  large  group  of  sympathetic  friends 
gives  me  great  pain." 

Abel  was  panting  for  breath  as  he  finished 
speaking.  Mrs.  Symonds  began  to  fan  him 
and  Inez  hurried  close  to  his  bedside. 

At  this  moment,  the  nurse,  who  suspected 
that  the  ladies  were  taxing  the  strength  of  their 
pastor  too  much,  put  in  an  appearance  and  re- 
garded them  with  severe  looks. 

"I  see  we  must  go,"  said  Mrs.  Symonds. 

"What  was  the  word  you  wanted  with  me  ?" 
Abel  was  breathing  easier,  and  smiling  affec- 
tionately first  at  Mrs.  Symonds  and  then  at  her 
daughter.  Then  he  looked  in  a  pleading  way 
at  his  nurse,  as  if  to  beg  for  a  moment  more. 

"It   is   this:    We   start  west  in   a  few  days. 


A    CURE    FOR   THE    BLUES  257 

You  say  you  are  going  to  California,  to  Los 
Angeles,  to  see  what  that  famed  country  is  like. 
Why  not  go  with  us  and  let  us  care  for  you  ? 
The  arrangement  would  please  us  so  much." 

"Oh,  so  much!"  urged  Inez,  raising  her 
beautiful  eyes  in  pleading  abandon  to  those  of 
Abel.  Both  of  the  women  had  found  his  sym- 
pathy very  sweet  in  the  terrible  days  which  had 
followed  the  suicide  of  the  man  they  had  so 
deeply  loved. 

"  I  see  no  reason  why  we  should  not  fly  across 
the  continent  together,"  pursued  Abel  musingly. 
"Perhaps  some  incipient  novelist  in  the  church 
will  announce  that  I  have  eloped  with  the  Cali- 
fornian  heiress,  and  the  congregation  will  mar- 
vel at  the  news  and  believe." 

The  ladies  laughed  and  Mrs.  Symonds  added 
as  they  went  out  of  the  room:  "That  would 
be  quite  in  keeping  with  a  people  whose  very 
creed  is  built  on  the  crudest  and  coarsest  kind 
of  fiction." 

Abel  winced  a  little,  for  the  time  was  short 
since  he  himself  had  been  a  sturdy  upholder  of 
the  Bible  story. 

"Who  this  wonderful  story-teller  was  nobody 
has  ever  known,"  mused  Abel  to  himself,  "but 
that  he  was  an  eminently  successful  one  —  as 
people  count  success  —  nobody  can  gainsay. 
He  was  a  most  conceited  one,  too,  as  conceited 
as  he  was  ignorant.  His  range  of  characters, 


258  ABELARD   AND    HELOISE 

though  small,  were  important,  embracing  as 
they  did  the  supposed  Maker  of  the  world, 
whom  he  named  Jehovah;  the  supposed  diabol- 
ical enemy  of  this  Jehovah,  whom  he  called 
'The  Serpent,'  and  two  persons  whom  he  called 
the  first  parents  of  mankind,  and  whom  he  de- 
scribed somewhat  as  Innocents  Abroad. 

"Neither,"  he  considered,  "can  anybody  dis- 
cover whether  the  relator  of  this  romance  meant 
his  story  to  be  taken  literally  or  as  a  clever  bit  of 
fiction.  But  whatever  he  intended,  the  novel 
has  had  a  stupendous  run  and  the  dramatized 
version  still  holds  the  stage,  and  multitudes  of 
devout  people  accept  the  leading  personage  of 
this  melodrama  as  one  of  the  Trinity  of  Gods 
who  rule  the  universe." 


CHAPTER  XIX 

ON  TO  THE  LAND  OF  HEART'S 
DESIRE 


"GoD  offers  to  every  mind  its  choice  between  truth 
and  repose.  Take  which  you  please;  you  can  never 
have  both."  —  Emerson. 

"!F  your  mirror  be  broken,  look  into  still  water; 
but  have  a  care  that  you  do  not  fall  in."  —  Hindu 
Proverb. 


;^^ 


XIX 


On  to  the  Land  of  Heart's  Desire 


REBIRTH  from  a  contracted  sphere  of  being, 
or  of  thinking,  to  one  of  larger  dimensions 
is  usually  a  cruel  process.  Even  if  it  has  been 
swift  and  apparently  Heaven-sent,  there  follows 
a  period  of  questioning  and  depression.  It  is 
hard  to  overcome  and  toss  away  the  inheritances 
bequeathed  by  an  old  religion. 

At  least  Abel  found  this  to  be  the  case  with 
himself,  and  as  there  was  no  Heloise  with  him 
to  help  him  with  firm  hand  and  serene  coun- 
tenance, he  might  have  sunk  into  a  condition  of 
apathetic  melancholy,  and  become  a  "ne'er- 
do-weel,"  in  so  far  as  the  propagation  of  any 
new  religion  was  concerned. 

In  Calvinism  of  a  narrow,  despairing  sort 
had  his  mother  conceived  him  and  brought  him 
forth.  Abel  could  not  remember  when  he  had 
not  been  subject  to  periods  of  the  deepest,  black- 
est depression.  At  such  times  he  was  sure  that 
he  was  a  castaway.  When  the  three  women 
called,  he  was  not  only  recovering  from  a  period 
of  physical  torture,  but  from  a  belated  midnight 
attack  of  his  old  enemy.  It  is  true  that  he  had 
endeavored  to  cultivate  a  more  cheerful  type 

z6i 


262  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

of  orthodoxy  than  that  of  his  mother,  and  had 
succeeded  in  lessening  the  number  of  these 
periods  of  despair  and  in  lightening  the  hue  of 
those  which  still  tarried.  He  had,  however, 
waked  in  the  dead  hour  of  the  preceding  night, 
after  a  three  days'  hard  fight  with  bodily  pain, 
only  to  find  himself  in  a  condition  of  depression 
greater  than  any  that  had  seized  him  since  he 
had  first  gotten  religion  at  all. 

Cold  drops  of  perspiration  stood  on  his  brow. 
He  felt  himself  to  be  lost,  irrevocably  lost,  and 
not  only  so,  but  doomed  to  be  a  stumbling  block 
in  the  way  of  salvation  to  others.  In  his  wretch- 
edness, he  repeated  over  and  over  again  the  de- 
spairing words  of  Christ,  "My  God,  my  God, 
why  hast  thou  forsaken  me!"  At  length,  his 
wretchedness  becoming  unendurable  in  the 
darkness,  he  turned  up  the  night-lamp,  when 
his  eyes  fell  upon  an  unopened  letter  directed  in 
the  flowing  handwriting  of  Heloise.  Clutching 
it  as  a  drowning  man  does  a  life-preserver  which 
has  been  flung  to  him  by  a  friendly  hand,  he 
eagerly  broke  the  seal.  It  contained  but  one 
line,  a  quotation  from  Emerson:  "O  jriend, 
never  strike  sail  to  a  fear." 

Ah,  what  joy  those  few  words  gave  him! 
What  renewed  confidence  in  the  Author  of  his 
being,  whose  other  name  is  Love! 

The  message  had  come  just  in  the  nick  of 
time,  from  the  beloved  one  whose  heart  beat  in 


ON  TO  THE  LAND  OF  HEART'S  DESIRE      263 

unison  with  his  own.  She  had  foreseen  his 
need  with  prophetic  vision.  So,  in  parting  with 
the  old  religion  he  had  not  parted  with  all  mes- 
sages from  the  unseen;  it  appeared  that  the  new 
religion  had  likewise  its  timely  word.  Abel 
was  so  happy  that  after  a  prayer  of  thanksgiving 
he  fell  into  a  sweet,  refreshing  sleep,  from  which 
he  emerged  free  from  pain,  either  of  a  physical 
or  mental  nature.  He  decided  ere  he  rose  from 
his  bed  that  he  would  formulate  a  new  creed  — 
at  least  for  his  own  use,  one  replete  with  the 
goodness  of  God,  and  with  the  vindictiveness 
of  man  left  out.  It  should  be  full  of  courage 
and  hope  for  the  unending  progress  of  the  race, 
and  not  a  line  in  it  should  "strike  sail  to  a 
fear." 

The  trip  to  California  was  full  of  keen  and 
pleasant  surprises  for  the  trio  of  good  friends. 
Every  hour  the  thought  that  he  was  nearing  his 
Heloise  rilled  his  heart  with  joy.  He  was 
astonished  at  the  bigness  of  the  country,  and  the 
richness  and  variety  of  its  resources.  What 
might  not  the  people  of  the  New  World  be  able 
to  accomplish  with  such  glorious  means  placed 
at  their  disposal  ?  Already  it  had  meant  a 
renaissance  of  the  expanding  portion  of  the  race 
along  democratic  lines.  It  would  mean  in  time 
the  economic  salvation  of  the  people.  Then 
would  flee  the  land  beastly,  cantankerous  Pov- 


264  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

erty,  the  prolific  mother  of  diseases  innumerable, 
of  wretchedness  unnamable,  of  devitalizing 
fear,  and  of  deadly  sin.  Surely,  it  is  the  desire 
of  God  that  the  human  spirit  should  grow  un- 
ceasingly in  its  veil  of  flesh,  and  has  He  not 
amply  furnished  here  the  means  for  the  proper 
growth  of  every  soul  ?  It  only  remains  for  the 
people  to  exercise  proper  control  of  these  means. 

Abel  had  passed  but  two  days  in  the  elegant 
home  of  Inez  Johnson,  in  Los  Angeles,  when  he 
insisted  that  he  must  be  setting  out  on  his  travels. 
He  therefore  bade  the  ladies  adieu,  promising 
to  let  them  hear  from  him  very  soon,  and  made 
his  way  at  once  to  Pasadena,  where  he  hoped 
to  find  Heloise,  as  he  had  obtained  her  mail  ad- 
dress from  Mrs.  Brookes,  the  boarding-house 
keeper,  before  he  left  Boston.  After  a  little 
difficulty  in  following  directions  he  arrived  at 
Mrs.  Hall's  cottage.  He  left  his  cab  waiting 
at  the  gate  and  hastened  to  the  front  entrance. 
He  had  no  eyes  for  anything,  save  only  Heloise, 
but  as  he  passed  along  the  main  walk  he  got  a 
dim  impression  that  the  place  was  a  cozy  little 
rural  nest,  and  a  fit  home  for  the  woman  he 
adored. 

In  answer  to  his  knock,  a  young  boy  opened 
the  door.  Abel  asked  eagerly  after  a  young 
lady  by  name  Miss  Heloise  Mills. 

The  lad  responded  in  a  sudden  access  of  ex- 
citement not  unmixed  with  sadness: 


ON  TO  THE  LAND  OF  HEART*S  DESIRE       265 

"Oh,  she  left  this  morning  for  Denver. 
Grandma  is  so  lonesome  without  her  that  she 
and  her  new  nurse  have  gone  to  spend  the  day 
with  mamma." 

Abel  felt  suddenly  faint  and  ill.  He  asked 
for  a  drink  of  water  and  seated  himself  on  the 
porch.  The  boy  returned  quickly  and  the  fresh 
and  sparkling  liquid  gave  Abel  new  strength. 

"Can  you  give  me  the  new  address  of  Miss 
Mills?"  he  asked  presently. 

"  I  can  give  you  the  address  of  the  man  who 
has  charge  of  her  things,"  observed  the  lad  sym- 
pathetically, for  he  saw  that  the  strange  man 
was  greatly  disappointed  over  not  finding  the 
young  lady. 

"What  things  ?"  asked  Abel  absently, wonder- 
ing what  the  boy  meant. 

"Why,  didn't  you  know  that  Heloise's  brother 
is  dead,  and  left  her  a  lot  of  money  and  things  ?" 

"  You  must  have  reference  to  the  death  of  her 
father,  my  boy.  I  never  heard  her  speak  of 
having  a  brother  living." 

"No,  my  grandmother  says  Heloise  didn't 
know  herself  she  had  a  brother  till  she  got  the 
news  of  his  death,  and  found  he  had  left  her  a 
lot  of  money  and  things.  He  must  have  left 
her  a  lot,  sure  enough!  Why,  she  made  this 
here  place  of  my  grandmother's  all  over  new 
before  she  left.  It  was  the  rottenest  old  place 
you  ever  saw,  when  she  came  to  it.  You  can 


266  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

see  for  yourself  what  it  looks  like  now.  I  tell 
you  that  Heloise  Mills  is  a  good  one  and  no 
mistake!  If  she  is  any  relation  of  yours,  you 
ought  to  be  mighty  proud  of  her!" 

"No,  I  can't  say  she  is  any  relation  of  mine  — 
but  it's  no  fault  of  mine  that  she  isn't!"  replied 
Abel  with  a  smile. 

The  boy  readily  surmised  the  true  state  of 
affairs. 

"Perhaps  you  found  her  hard  to  land;  so  did 
the  young  man  who  helped  her  fix  the  garden,, 
He  was  dreadfully  gone  on  her.  But  grandma 
said  she  was  in  love  with  an  Eastern  man  and 
would  have  nothing  to  say  to  the  Pasadena  man. 
I  think  she  missed  it  by  not  throwing  the  other 
man  over.  Why,  that  Pasadena  man  has  the 
prettiest  place  in  the  country!  —  not  so  big  as 
some,  but  it  would  make  your  mouth  water  to 
see  it!" 

"Did  Heloise  see  his  home  ?" 

"Yes,  the  man  took  her  all  over  it  and  gave 
her  supper  into  the  bargain.  He  was  dead  in 
love  with  her  from  the  start." 

"And  is  he  a  gardener  by  profession  ?" 

"Yes,  a  way-up  one  —  you  bet!  Gets  fine 
paying  orders.  I  don't  know  how  he  came  to 
help  lay  out  and  fix  up  my  grandmother's  rotten 
little  place.  I  guess  Heloise  was  what  fixed 
him.  Anybody  would  work  for  her!" 

In  spite  of  all  of  Abel's  self-restraint,  some 


ON  TO  THE  LAND  OF  HEART'S  DESIRE       267 

keen  pangs  of  jealousy  darted  through  his  breast 
in  connection  with  this  man.  He  had  all  along 
felt  a  presentiment  that  in  this  sort  of  a  person 
he  should  find  a  rival,  for  he  well  knew  that 
Heloise  was  a  passionate  lover  of  Mother  Earth, 
and  could  easily  and  rapidly  enter  into  sym- 
pathetic relations  with  a  man  having  the  same 
strong  liking  for  the  soil,  and  the  things  to  be 
gotten  out  of  it. 

He  moved  uneasily  in  his  chair  and  finally 
rose  in  an  absent-minded  manner.  The  boy, 
who  was  alert  to  every  movement  and  look  he 
made,  offered  to  show  him  how  "perfectly 
lovely  the  gardener  had  laid  out  the  back  yard." 
He  also  insisted  on  showing  his  visitor,  after  he 
had  gotten  him  behind  the  house,  not  only  the 
new  garden  but  the  barn,  and  he  grew  quite 
eloquent  over  the  changes  that  had  been  effected 
there  in  so  short  a  time.  Then  he  drew  him  to 
the  new  hen  coop  and  threw  the  chickens  some 
grain  in  order  to  show  Abel  how  spry  the  birds 
were,  and  how  lordly  the  rooster  became  under 
such  exciting  circumstances.  He  lamented  that 
his  grandma  and  nurse  had  the  horse  and  car- 
riage with  them,  as  he  would  so  much  like  to 
exhibit  them  likewise.  But  in  lieu  of  the  horse 
he  ran  and  got  his  bicycle  and  did  some  tricks, 
much  to  Abel's  amusement.  Finally,  having 
exhausted  the  wonders  outside  of  the  house,  he 
took  his  visitor  over  every  part  of  the  inside  and 


268  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

ended  by  declaring  that,  "  Heloise  was  a  dandy 
—  she  did  things  so  quick!" 

Having  appreciated  everything,  including 
the  lad's  pleasure  in  exhibiting  the  place,  Abel 
at  last  reached  the  porch  and  tried  to  say  good- 
by  to  his  little  friend,  but  without  success; 
the  boy  hung  onto  him  like  a  burr  until  he  was 
in  his  cab.  He  made  Abel  promise  that  if  he 
found  Heloise  anywhere  in  the  course  of  his 
travels,  he  would  urge  her  to  come  back  "be- 
cause we  are  all  so  lonesome  without  her." 

As  Abel  was  lonesome,  too,  he  took  the  very 
next  train  for  Denver,  saying  to  himself  that 
California  was  doubtless  all  its  most  ardent  ad- 
mirers claimed,  but  that  he  was  quite  satisfied 
with  a  flying  trip  through  it,  for  the  present. 

Notwithstanding  that  Abel's  mind  and  heart 
and  soul  were  full  of  Heloise,  and  the  things  he 
should  say  to  her  as  soon  as  they  met,  he  was 
many  times  transported  with  awe  and  wonder 
at  the  glorious  views  which  presented  them- 
selves as  the  cars  whirled  him  rapidly  towards 
his  destination.  At  such  times  he  would  sigh 
deeply  and  say  to  himself,  "Oh,  if  only  Heloise 
could  enjoy  this  magnificent  scenery  with  me, 
how  happy  I  would  be!  A  man  without  a 
woman  is  a  very  incomplete  creature." 

But  the  three  days'  trip  and  its  scenery  were 
soon  things  of  the  past,  and  the  City  of  the 
Plains  something  to  be  enjoyed  in  the  present, 


ON  TO  THE  LAND  OF  HEART'S  DESIRE       269 

perhaps  with  his  Heloise  by  his  side.  He  would 
not  permit  himself  to  dwell  on  this  last  prospect; 
it  offered  too  full  a  draught  of  human  happiness. 
If  only  he  could  hold  her  hand  in  his  for  a  few 
swift  moments,  look  deep  into  her  lovely  eyes 
and  have  a  half-hour's  talk  with  her,  he  would, 
he  thought,  be  satisfied  for  a  long  time  to  come. 
For  in  that  half-hour,  he  felt  sure  he  could  win 
her  promise  to  write  him  at  least  once  every 
week.  In  comparison  with  the  single  message 
he  had  received  during  a  half  a  dozen  weeks 
that  would  be  bliss  indeed!  As  for  being  able 
to  secure  Heloise's  hand  in  marriage,  he  felt 
deep  within  his  soul  a  premonition  that  no 
speedy  union  was  to  be  effected. 

"Religion,"  mused  Abel,  "is  never  likely  to 
prove  really  successful  as  a  matchmaker  until 
it  sets  the  two  sexes  side  by  side  and  grants  them 
equal  liberty  and  equal  marital  rights.  It  is 
quite  true  that  what  is  called  marriage  is  en- 
tered into  by  the  great  majority  of  human  beings, 
but  when  one  sees  the  foremost  nations  of  the 
earth  armed  to  the  teeth,  and  observes  that  all 
mankind  is  in  a  state  of  terrible  unrest,  if  not 
of  actual  war,  and  that  monopoly  is  everywhere 
the  rule  and  that  equal  rights  nowhere  prevail, 
one  must  perceive  there  is  something  wrong  at 
the  very  foundations  of  society,  and  those  foun- 
dations are  in  the  home,  on  which  all  society 
rests." 


2/O  ABELARD   AND    HELOISE 

He  might  also  have  added:  And  when  one 
attends  weddings  and  sees  priests  vowing  one 
sex  into  life-long  vassalage  to  the  other,  it  is 
easy  to  arrive  at  the  conclusion  that  while  reli- 
gion is  the  great  match-maker,  it  is  at  the  same 
time  the  great  mischief-maker  of  modern  times. 
For  as  soon  as  the  husband  begins  to  wield  the 
unnatural  power  which  religion  and  the  State 
places  in  his  hands,  the  ideality  of  the  relation 
departs  and  the  warring  element  enters  —  more 
or  less  disguised  —  and  is  duly  transferred  to 
offspring. 

Abel  sighed.  Then  suddenly  a  keen  pang 
of  fear  shot  through  his  breast.  "Ah,"  he  half 
muttered,  "it  would  be  just  like  Heloise  if  she 
has  fallen  heir  to  a  large  sum  of  money  to  start 
in  some  way  a  big  fight  for  the  equality  of  her 
sex  with  mine,  and  to  refuse  to  wed  until  the 
battle  is  won  —  at  least  in  America.  In  that 
case,  Heaven  help  me!" 


CHAPTER  XX 
THE  LOVERS'  MEETING 


"WE  see  but  half  the  causes  of  our  deeds, 
Seeking  them  wholly  in  the  outer  life. 
And  heedless  of  the  encircling  spirit  world, 

Which,  though  unseen,  is  felt,  and  sows  in  us 
All  germs  of  pure  and  world-wide  purposes." 

Lowell. 

"AUGUSTINE  felt  that  Christ  asked  him  to  sacrifice 
every  pleasure  and  interest  that  was  purely  of  this 
world.  A  complete  sacrifice  of  female  love  was  the 
supreme  test  of  readiness  to  be  a  disciple." 


XX 


The  Lovers'   Meeting 

* 

WHEN  Heloise  left  for  Denver,  Mrs.  Hall 
arranged  that,  on  reaching  that  city,  she 
should  go  directly  to  relatives  of  hers,  residing 
there,  to  stay  until  she  could  look  about.  But 
by  the  second  day  after  Heloise's  advent  she  had 
made  herself  so  "solid"  with  the  household, 
from  the  mistress  down  to  Nettie,  the  maid,  that 
they  begged  her  to  accept  their  hospitality 
longer. 

It  was  there  that  Abel  found  her,  and  trem- 
blingly rang  the  sacred  door-bell,  sacred  be- 
cause she  had  touched  it. 

Thankful  indeed  was  Heloise  that  Abel  was 
ushered  into  the  parlor  while  other  members  of 
the  family  were  present.  With  the  memory  of 
their  last  interview  vividly  in  her  mind,  and 
with  her  purpose  to  eschew  marriage  not  a  whit 
lessened,  the  presence  of  others  would  save  her 
from  any  possible  emotional  explosion  on  his 
part.  And  she  dreaded  herself  no  less  than 
Abel,  should  a  crisis  arise  between  them. 

Meeting  as  they  did,  both  bore  themselves 
admirably,  and  only  the  changeful  color  in 
either  face  could  have  given  the  onlookers  a 


274  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

hint  of  what  lay  beneath.  When  they  were  left 
alone,  she  lost  no  time  in  begging  Abel  to  give 
her  a  full  account  of  all  that  had  happened  in 
the  interval. 

"To  business  at  once?  without  a  word  —  a 
look  of  love  —  an  embrace  ?"  he  asked. 

"Take  the  love  for  granted,  Abel;  and  tell  me 
without  delay  about  yourself  and  your  church. 
I  fear  you  have  suffered." 

And  as  Abel  told  her  all,  without  reservation 
or  interruption,  she  listened  with  widening  eyes 
and  bated  breath.  When  he  had  finished  she 
exclaimed,  "Abelard,  how  you  astonish  me!" 

She  had  not  believed  it  possible  that  Abel 
could  have  undergone  so  sudden  and  thorough 
a  conversion.  It  was  like  that  of  the  Apostle 
Paul. 

Her  own  change  of  heart  had  been  a  very 
slow  and  cautious  growth.  She  received  a  new 
idea  with  reluctance,  examined  it  on  every  side, 
walked  with  it,  ate  with  it,  and  slept  with  it;  she 
could  scarcely  tell  when  it  became  a  part  of  her. 
But  here,  by  her  side,  was  a  person  who  had 
fairly  changed  his  soul  from  the  effect  of  a  vision 
in  the  night,  of  the  duration  of  which  he  had  not 
the  slightest  idea.  He  could  not  even  tell 
whether  he  was  in  the  body  or  out,  and  only 
knew  that  when  he  came  to  himself  he  realized 
with  joy  that  he  was  a  new  creature  in  a  new 
and  expanded  universe. 


THE  LOVERS*  MEETING  275 

"A  new  creature  in  Christ?"  queried  she, 
putting  him  to  the  severest  test  she  could 
imagine. 

"  In  one  respect,  a  new  creature  out  of  Christ, 
I  should  say,"  boldly  affirmed  Abel. 

"In  what  respect  ?" 

"Heloise!  How  can  you  ask?  Has  not  one 
of  my  very  first  acts,  born  of  my  new  religion, 
been  to  seek  light  from  a  woman  ?  Christ  never 
did  that.  It  never  seems  to  have  occurred  to 
him  that  God  not  only  lighteth  every  man  who 
cometh  into  the  world  but  likewise  every  woman; 
and  that  occasionally  He  gives  the  strongest  and 
clearest  light  to  one  of  that  sex.  But,  my  love, 
the  religion  of  Christ  was  such  an  advance  upon 
that  of  the  Jews  of  his  time  that  the  Testament 
which  deals  with  his  life  and  acts  may  well  be 
called  the  New  Testament.  Still,  while  Christ 
was  uniformly  kind  to  women  and  permitted 
them  to  minister  to  his  physical  necessities,  he 
never  took  sweet  counsel  with  them,  or  accepted 
them  as  regular  disciples.  He  never  looked 
upon  them  as  created  to  be  the  companions  and 
equals  of  his  own  sex  in  a  high  sense  of  the 
word.  He  would  never  have  thought  it  worth 
his  while  to  consult  one,"  persisted  Abel. 

"Ah,  Abel,  777/0,  your  advance  has  been  so 
swift  that  you  fairly  take  my  breath  away.  I 
fear  that  you  will  convince  me  that  men  leap 
where  women  crawl." 


2/6  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

Abel  merely  smiled  and  continued: 

"  But  now  let  us  suppose  that  Christ  had  seen 
the  necessity  of  co-education  and  equality,  had 
taught  man  neither  to  despise  nor  fear  woman, 
but  to  boldly  and  lovingly  accept  her  as  his  com- 
panion, friend,  and  co-worker  in  the  progress  of 
the  world.  What  beautiful,  pious  souls  might 
have  multiplied  in  the  world  in  place  of  the  soli- 
tary, barren  monks  and  nuns,  who  leave  no  in- 
heritors of  their  devotion  to  God  and  things 
spiritual.  How  much  speedier  might  have  been 
the  advance  of  the  race!  There  is  no  doubt  in 
my  mind  but  that  by  degrading  woman  religion 
has  inconceivably  retarded  the  progress  of  man- 
kind.;' 

"You  are  right,  my  wise  Abelard.  And  you 
will  help  build  a  new  religion  on  the  Rise  of 
Man  and  the  Equality  of  the  Sexes  —  promise 
me!" 

Abel  grasped  both  of  Heloise's  hands  firmly 
in  his  own,  and  looking  deep  into  her  clear, 
serene  eyes  said : 

"  I  promise  you,  my  sweet,  other  self,  that  so 
long  as  the  vision  of  that  newly  discovered, 
blessed  paradise  remains  with  me,  wherein  I 
saw  multitudes  of  beings  dwelling  together  in 
perfect  equality,  that  I  will  be  true  to  the  new- 
born faith  within  me.  May  I  seal  my  promise 
with  a  kiss  ? "  he  added  lightly,  after  a  little 
pause. 


THE  LOVERS     MEETING 

"With  two,  if  they  will  make  it  any  more 
binding,"  said  Heloise,  smiling  up  at  him  archly. 

Abel  first  kissed  her  reverentially  on  the  fore- 
head, but  after  their  long  separation  the  contact 
proved  too  much  for  him;  his  passionate  nature, 
so  long  held  in  complete  subjection,  burst  its 
bounds  at  last.  He  grasped  her  almost  fiercely 
in  his  arms  and  held  her  tightly  to  his  breast, 
then  he  kissed  her  on  the  lips  in  that  perfect 
abandonment  of  bliss  which  is  heedless  of  con- 
sequences. If  Heloise's  nature  had  been  equally 
starved  and  passionate,  there  would  be  little 
more  to  relate  than  that  these  two  soon  pledged 
themselves,  according  to  the  usual  custom,  on 
the  one  hand  to  life-long  mastership,  on  the 
other  to  life-long  servitude. 

But  the  new  Heloise,  unlike  the  old,  retained 
possession  of  her  faculties;  she  was  soon  mis- 
tress of  herself.  With  firm  hands  she  released 
herself  from  Abel's  tiger-like  grip,  and  the  next 
moment  had  her  finger  on  the  electric  button. 
Then  she  quietly  sat  down  and  motioned  to  Abel, 
who  was  standing  a  few  paces  away,  still  be- 
wildered with  his  late  intoxicating  rapture,  to 
seat  himself  likewise. 

He  finally  did  so,  but  so  slowly  and  reluctantly 
that  the  servant  entered  while  he  was  still  stand- 
ing and  regarding  Heloise  with  eyes  that  de- 
voured her.  The  girl  took  no  notice  of  him, 


278  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

but  looked  at  Heloise  inquiringly,  and  it  must 
be  confessed  with  a  smile. 

"We  are  ready,  Nettie,  for  tea,"  said  Heloise 
in  her  most  matter-of-fact  and  business-like 
tones. 

"Yes'm,"  responded  the  girl,  as  she  quickly 
departed. 

By  this  time  Abel  had  managed  to  sit  down. 
Nevertheless,  the  moment  the  door  had  closed, 
he  rushed  over  to  Heloise  to  say  beseechingly: 

"My  dear  one,  can  you  ever  trust  me  again  ?" 

"I  am  the  one  to  blame,"  replied  she  promptly. 
"I  wantonly  offered  two  kisses  when  you  re- 
spectfully asked  for  one.  My  thoughtless  action 
has  led  me  to  wonder  if  the  religious  teachers  of 
the  past  have  not  had  good  reasons  for  restrict- 
ing and  degrading  woman  as  they  have  done. 
You  know  that  St.  Augustine  declared,  'We 
have  to  beware  of  Eve  in  every  woman,  no 
matter  who  she  is.'  I  sincerely  beg  your 
pardon,  Abelard;  I  shall  be  more  careful  in 
the  future." 

Abel  for  a  moment  wore  a  crestfallen  air,  as 
if  his  future  did  not  hold  for  him  all  that  he 
could  wish;  then  he  rallied. 

"Let  us  kiss  and  make  up,"  urged  he,  quite 
willing  to  be  tempted  again. 

"Agreed,"  said  Heloise,  laughing,  "provided 
you  give  me  the  kiss  from  a  distance." 

"At  how  many  paces  ?"  he  asked,  perceiving 


THE  LOVERS'   MEETING  279 

that  though  she  was  in  a  merry  mood  she  meant 
strictly  what  she  said. 

"Oh,  that  arm-chair  by  the  little  table  will  do. 
But  you  will  have  to  be  in  haste,  for  the  maid 
will  soon  be  back." 

Abel  seated  himself  at  once  —  which  was 
what  Heloise  was  maneuvering  for  —  and  hav- 
ing thrown  one  kiss  with  very  amusing  but  only 
fairly  satisfactory  results,  he  followed  suit  with 
others,  until  he  was  pulled  up  with  a  shock  by 
the  noiseless  entrance  of  Nettie  with  the  tray. 
To  such  imbecility  does  love  frequently  reduce 
the  wisest  and  best  of  men! 

A  little  repast,  consisting  of  strawberries, 
cream,  cakes,  and  tea,  was  temptingly  spread 
out  on  the  table  by  Abel's  side. 

"  Is  there  anything  else  you  would  like,  Miss 
Mills,"  asked  the  maid. 

"  I  think  not,  Nettie.     Thank  you." 

Nettie  closed  the  door  securely  behind  her, 
for  she  had  already  come  to  the  conclusion  that 
these  two  were  lovers. 

When  the  cakes  and  strawberries  had  dis- 
appeared, and  they  were  sipping  their  tea,  Abel 
bethought  him  to  ask: 

"Now,  tell  me,  what  have  you  done  since  you 
reached  Denver  ? " 

"  Do  you  really  think  the  acts  of  a  woman  are 
worth  recording  ?  " 

"Certainly!     That  is  to  be  part  of  my  new 


280  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

creed  —  equal  recognition,  equal  justice  to  man 
and  woman;  and  public  statues  and  commem- 
orative tablets,  windows,  and  so  forth  and  ditto, 
to  worth  and  nobility  in  either  sex." 

Heloise  laughed  heartily.  "I  never  hear 
*  ditto'  but  I  am  reminded  of  the  man  who,  after 
an  absence,  was  looking  over  the  domestic  ac- 
counts and  became  alarmed  at  the  frequency  of 
the  word,  to  the  meaning  of  which  his  wife  could 
give  him  no  clue  —  she  could  only  assure  him 
she  would  never  get  so  much  of  it  again.  Finally 
he  ran  to  the  butcher  and  when  he  came  back 
his  wife  asked,  'What  did  you  find  out  ?'  'Su- 
san,' he  replied  rather  reluctantly,  'I  found  out 
that  you  are  a  fool  and  that  I  am  a  ditto!'  Well, 
as  a  rule,  men  are  fools  and  women  ditto,  but  I 
think  there  would  be  many  more  exceptions  if 
my  sex  received  the  same  encouragement  and 
rewards  for  well  doing  as  yours." 

"True,  quite  true,"  murmured  the  new  Abel- 
ard,  sipping  the  remains  of  his  tea  slowly  and 
thoughtfully.  The  attitude  of  both  had  become 
thoughtful,  with  this  difference;  that  while  Abel 
seemed  to  have  entered  the  realm  of  dreamy 
meditation,  Heloise  appeared  aflame  with  pent- 
up  energy:  so  much  so  that  two  perpendicular 
lines  —  very  faint  as  yet  —  showed  themselves 
between  her  eyes. 

"Abelard,  I  read  to-day  in  a  magazine  some- 
thing that  impressed  me.  The  article  was  en- 


THE  LOVERS'    MEETING  28l 

titled  'Feminine  Mind  Worship/  The  writer 
claims  there  are  two  types  of  minds,  the  mascu- 
line and  the  feminine,  and  naturally  adds,  too, 
that  the  masculine  mind  is  productive  and  the 
feminine  mind  unproductive.  Now  one  would 
suppose  that  woman  would  have  a  monopoly  of 
the  feminine  mind,  and  that  in  her  it  would 
reach  its  completest  development.  But,  no  — 
this  writer  declares  that  the  feminine  mind  is 
most  highly  developed  in  clergymen,  and  that  for 
twenty  centuries  they  have  practically  stopped 
all  development  of  the  masculine  mind.  Only 
during  the  last  century  does  he  admit  that  the 
masculine  has  broken  loose  and  the  result  is 
civilization." 

"Well,  I  think  the  man  speaks  the  truth. 
The  religious  men  of  the  past  have  certainly 
done  all  they  could  to  sterilize  the  mind  of 
woman.  If,  in  the  pursuit  of  this  barbarous 
practice,  they  have  sterilized  their  own,  it  is  a 
just  retribution.  Thank  heaven,  though  I,  too, 
am  a  clergyman,  I  have  been  enabled  to  break 
loose  from  that  control!" 

"  And  you  are  going  to  give  me  a  bit  of  credit 
for  helping  you  to  break  away  ?  Admit  now, 
that  I  at  least  helped  set  you  to  thinking." 

"Yes,  dearest,  to  you  belongs  my  awakening. 
Certainly,  I  should  have  had  no  such  terrible 
travail  of  spirit  from  which  came  the  new  birth 
but  for  your  firm  stand  in  respect  to  marriage." 


282  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

Abelard  reached  out  his  arm  across  the  little 
table  and  placed  his  hand  affectionately  on  those 
of  Heloise.  For  a  moment  each  gazed  deep 
into  one  another's  eyes. 

Abel  presently  said,  "Ah,  but  how  about 
your  doings  since  you  reached  here  ?  Come, 
tell  me!" 

"Oh,  Abelard,  I  must  shelve  the  record  for 
to-night.  I  am  very  tired.  My  affairs  are 
many  and  complicated.  I  must  not  only  eat 
well  but  sleep  well  to  do  them  justice.  And 
I  suppose  I  ought  to  dress  well!  I  have  been 
trying  to  pay  some  attention  to  that  since  the 
man  with  the  hoe  suggested  that  it  was  a  part 
of  my  duty." 

Abelard  withdrew  his  arm  with  a  precipitancy 
that  was  anything  but  graceful;  still,  he  asked 
as  mildly  as  his  perturbed  spirit  would  admit: 

"  How  about  that  man  with  the  hoe  ?  I  was 
told  he  showed  you  around  his  place  and  enter- 
tained you  in  fine  style;  and,  moreover,  fell 
head-over-heels  in  love  with  you." 

"Nothing  more  to-night,  Abelard,  caro  mio. 
I  am  'dead  tired/  as  the  slang  phrase  has  it. 
How  expressive  slang  is  sometimes.  To-mor- 
row you  shall  ask  all  the  questions  you  please, 
and  I  will  endeavor  to  give  you  coherent  an- 
swers. But  for  to-night  —  I  am  finished." 

She  rose  and  extended  her  hand  to  him. 
Abel  made  a  virtue  of  necessity  and  rose  also, 


THE    LOVERS'    MEETING  283 

clasped  Heloise's  hand  in  his,  looked  unutterable 
things  into  her  eyes,  and  reluctantly  took  his 
leave, 

Heloise  had  spoken  the  truth,  as  usual  — 
she  was  "dead  tired."  Ten  minutes  after  his 
departure  she  was  sound  asleep. 


CHAPTER  XXI 
A  GODDESS  OF  LIBERTY 


"THE  United  States  is  the  first  great  nation  to  be 
faced  with  a  problem  which  bids  fair  to  cast  its  shadow 
over  the  whole  world  —  the  growing  tyranny  of  Mam- 
mon. No  wonder  that  it  is  creating  a  convulsion  in 
their  politics  and  that  the  Republicans  find  themselves 
between  the  alternative  risks  of  losing  the  people  or 
the  financiers."  —  The  London  Daily  News. 

"WOMEN  will  lose  the  chivalrous  attentions  of  men 
if  they  are  enfranchised,'  was  another  argument  of  the 
distrustful  anti-suffragist.  To  the  women  who  are 
influenced  by  such  a  prophecy  of  man  falling  from  his 
high  estate  when  he  finds  woman  his  political  equal, 
I  would  say:  'My  dear  friends,  your  fears  are  ground- 
less. You  place  a  high  value  on  the  chivalrous  atten- 
tions that  men  now  show  you.  Why,  you  have  not 
the  remotest  idea  of  the  vast  stores  of  chivalry  hidden 
away  in  the  inner  recesses  of  man's  nature.  When 
you  get  a  vote  you  will  find  that  the  chivalry  of  the 
middle  ages  was  a  poor  thing  in  comparison  with  that 
of  the  twentieth  century.  The  chivalrous  attentions 
paid  by  candidates  to  women  voters  are  most  embar- 
rassing —  Sir  Walter  Raleighs  and  De  Lorges  are 
thick  as  leaves  in  Vallombrosa  at  election  time."- 
Vida  Goldstein. 


XXI 


A  Goddess  of  Liberty 

* 

THE  next  evening  Heloise  appeared  down- 
stairs in  a  new  and  gracefully  fitting  robe 
made  of  some  thin  black  material,  which  was  ex- 
ceedingly becoming  to  her.  She  had  relented 
towards  her  beautiful  hair  and  let  some  tiny  locks 
here  and  there  stray  about  her  forehead  and 
neck,  and  coil  themselves  into  delicate  rings. 
A  cluster  of  white  roses  pinned  on  her  breast 
relieved  her  rather  somber  dress. 

She  was  looking  over  some  papers  beneath 
the  soft  light  of  a  large  lamp  when  the  servant 
ushered  in  her  expected  guest.  They  greeted 
one  another  with  love-lit  eyes  and  extended 
hands. 

"And  hpw  is  my  Heloise  to-night  ?"  he  asked, 
retaining  possession  of  both  her  hands. 

"Quite  well,  and  you,  caro?" 

The  caressing  word  emboldened  him  to  raise 
each  fair  hand  in  turn  to  his  lips.  He  reluc- 
tantly dropped  them.  "How  can  you  ask?" 
he  said  a  little  reproachfully.  "Have  I  not  the 
appearance  of  a  man  newly  crowned  ?" 

"You  surely  look  better  than  I  have  ever  seen 
you,"  'she  replied  as  she  seated  him  in  the  big 


288  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

armchair.     "Your   new  religion  seems  to    act 
as  a  tonic." 

"No,  as  a  food.  A  religion  in  which  Fear 
is  cast  out  —  I  am  beginning  to  learn  —  is  the 
best  kind  of  food  for  health  and  sanity.  Then 
a  new  and  expanded  love  for  woman,  quick- 
ened through  intense  love  for  one  woman,  is 
taking  the  premature  stoop  out  of  my  shoulders 
and  the  droop  from  my  lips." 

"So  I  perceive  and  I  like  you  better  so, 
though  I  fell  in  love  with  you  in  spite  of  stoop 
and  droop." 

Both  laughed  and  looked  fondly  into  each 
other's  eyes  until  Abel  was  tempted  to  ask  her 
if  he  might  not  have  some  more  practice  in  the 
arts  of  either  administering  or  throwing  kisses. 
Perceiving,  however,  that  she  took  on  a  serious 
air,  as  her  gaze  turned  to  the  pile  of  papers  on 
the  table,  and  that  the  two  perpendicular  lines 
began  to  show  in  her  finely  molded  forehead, 
he  remarked: 

"I  am  afraid  you  will  soon  lose  that  softly 
smiling,  tranquil,  Madonna-of-the-Grand-Duke 
air  if  you  are  not  careful!" 

"Ah,  'tis  a  problem  —  how  to  retain  Ma- 
donna-like graces  when  one  has  fallen  heir  to 
five  or  six  millions." 

"Heloise!  What  are  you  talking  about?" 
Abel  looked  thoroughly  mystified,  for  he  knew 
she  was  not  given  to  idle  words. 


A    GODDESS    OF    LIBERTY  289 

"Why,  have  you  not  heard  of  my  brother's 
death,  and  that  he  left  his  entire  fortune  —  in- 
cluding that  of  his  uncle,  whose  death  preceded 
his  own  —  to  me?" 

He  did  not  answer  immediately,  then  he  said : 

"I  recall  now  that  the  little  boy  near  Pasa- 
dena who  showed  me  over  the  place  told  me  you 
had  received  news  of  a  long-lost  brother  who 
had  been  living  all  the  years  you  thought  him 
dead,  and  that  the  same  letter  which  informed 
you  of  this  fact  also  gave  notice  of  his  death. 
Dear  Love,  I  am  very  sorry  for  you!" 

He  went  quickly  over  to  her  side  and  pressed 
a  kiss  on  her  forehead  in  the  tenderest  manner. 
If  there  was  passion  in  the  kiss  it  was  passion 
in  repose.  Tears  slowly  gathered  in  her  eyes 
and  one  of  them  had  the  audacity  to  fall  on  a 
paper  of  great  importance.  She  quickly  brushed 
it  off,  saying: 

"  I  find  a  good  many  complaints  about  women 
who  attempt  to  transact  business.  That  tear 
splotching  a  neatly  executed  document  would 
seem  to  bear  out  the  truth  of  these  assertions." 

"That  tear  testifies  to  the  tenderness  of  a 
woman's  heart.  I  suspect  that  we  need  a  lot  of 
that  tenderness  in  our  business  affairs  right 
now,  for  the  times  seem  to  me  to  be  very  hard, 
unsympathetic  and  materialistic.  The  wheels 
of  Mammon  are  pressing  us  all  hard."  Abel 
reseated  himself  with  a  sigh.  Presently  he  said 


290  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

thoughtfully,  and  with  his  dreamy  air:  "And 
your  brother  has  reappeared  in  your  life  only  to 
disappear  beyond  hope  of  return." 

Heloise  hastened  to  brush  away  another  tear 
as  she  replied,  "The  dream  so  long  entertained 
in  secret  that  we  might  meet  again  in  the  flesh 
is  quite  dispelled.  It  only  remains  that  I  should 
endeavor  to  acquit  myself  in  the  best  manner 
possible  of  the  responsibility  he  has  bequeathed 
to  me." 

"And  so  he  has  left  you  an  enormous  sum  of 
money  to  play  with,"  mused  Abel. 

She  smiled  faintly  as  she  answered,  "That  is 
too  much  the  fashion  of  to-day.  Indeed,  I 
sometimes  think  this  might  with  truth  be  called 
the  gambling  age.  Where  the  tendency  will 
lead  us,  remains  to  be  seen." 

"If  only  we  could  get  all  our  gambling  mil- 
lionaires into  an  automobile,  and  put  one  of 
them  who  had  imbibed  too  much  in  control, 
with  full  speed  on,  as  happened  lately  with  one 
couple — " 

"O  Abel,  how  blood-thirsty  you  have  sud- 
denly become!  Surely,  there  is  some  way  of 
controlling  this  gambling  spirit  —  to  extinguish 
it  is  of  course  impossible  —  so  that  our  ma- 
terial affairs  shall  rest  on  a  more  secure  basis 
and  our  plain  people  regain  their  lost  liberties 
and  heritage  without  bloodshed.  I  am  so  sin- 


A   GODDESS    OF    LIBERTY  29! 

cere  an  evolutionist  that  I  have  no  taste  for 
revolutions." 

"Birth  is  usually  accompanied  by  the  shed- 
ding of  blood,"  he  replied. 

"Physical  birth,  yes.  But  what  the  people 
need  now  is  a  national  re-birth  of  the  normal 
order.  Do  you  recall  what  Sumner  said  when 
people  accused  him  of  being  in  politics  ?" 

"No,  I  know  little  of  politics  or  politicians." 

"He  used  to  reply,  'I  am  not  in  politics,  I  am 
in  morals,'  and  he  did  his  best  to  give  our  people 
moral  notions  respecting  the  treatment  of  a  race 
whose  skin  happened  to  be  black  instead  of 
white." 

"  But  it  was  finally  settled  by  the  shedding  of 
blood,  if  I  remember  aright." 

"Ah,  but  that  was  more  than  a  quarter  of  a 
century  ago.  We  are  a  riper  people  now  and 
have  grown  more  thoughtful.  Moreover,  arbi- 
tration is  now  becoming  the  order  of  the  day." 

"True,  true.  Europe,  armed  to  the  teeth, 
talks  eloquently  of  arbitration,  but  I  can't  forget 
our  misunderstanding  with  Spain,  and  that  of 
England  with  two  fairly  well-governed  little 
republics,  and  the  China  episode  —  very  bloody 
and  very  disgraceful.  No!  I  am  not  very  op- 
timistic in  respect  to  even  moral  re-births  taking 
place  without  the  shedding  of  blood.  And  if 
blood  is  to  be  shed,  why,  naturally,  I  prefer  that 
the  blood  of  the  guilty  should  flow  rather  than 


292  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

that  of  the  innocent,  the  brave,  and  the  true. 
That  is  why  I  suggest  that  a  pretty  generous 
automobile  accident,  taking  in  the  most  dan- 
gerous enemies  that  this  Republic  has,  might 
not  be  a  national  calamity.  There  is  no  doubt 
but  that  South  African  millionaires  were  the 
power  behind  the  English  Government  which 
closed  up  the  business  of  the  little  republics. 
Our  concern  now  is  to  see  the  biggest  of  all  re- 
publics save  itself  from  Frankensteins  of  its 
own  creation." 

The  two  faint  perpendicular  lines  showed  up 
quite  plainly  between  Heloise's  straight  eye- 
brows as  she  replied: 

"But  there  are  millionaires  and  millionaires. 
Please  remember  that  your  Heloise  is  now  one, 
and  that  the  question  before  us  is  how  I  am  to 
become  a  good  and  helpful  millionaire;  or  if 
that  is  impossible,  to  wisely  distribute  the  large 
amount  placed  at  my  disposal.  You  must  help 
me  solve  this  problem,  Abelard." 

"  It  is  the  fashion  of  the  times,  I  believe,  for 
those  who  are  called  good  millionaires  to  devote 
a  portion  of  their  fortunes  to  charity  in  some 
shape." 

"  I  am  sick  of  the  very  word  charity!  I  prefer 
justice  to  charity,  in  my  relations  with  my  fellow 
beings.  Of  course,  there  are  many  instances 
where  charity,  either  organized  or  individual, 
must  come  to  the  aid  of  the  unfortunate,  but 


when  you  consider  that  we  have  charity  every- 
where and  justice  almost  nowhere,  it  behooves 
those  who  have  the  expansion  of  the  race  at 
heart  to  set  a  new  fashion  and  make  charity  and 
justice  change  places!" 

"But  how  do  you  propose  to  bring  about  a 
change  so  radical  —  for  radical  it  is  —  consider- 
ing that  our  experiment  of  having  a  government 
of,  by,  and  for  the  people  has  largely  merged 
into  a  government  of,  by,  and  for  the  capitalists, 
and  is  now  busy  imitating  England  of  the  pres- 
ent, or  Rome  of  the  past,  in  empire  building. 
Our  free  school  system  was  expected  to  lay  the 
foundations  of  a  true  republic,  so  firm  and  solid 
that  nothing  could  subvert  it.  But  it  has  failed." 

"And  Carnegie  is  busy  supplementing  our 
free  school  system  with  free  libraries  for  the 
people,"  added  Heloise,  tapping  her  foot  on  the 
floor  in  a  rhythmic  manner,  as  she  occasionally 
did  when  thinking  aloud. 

For  a  time  they  both  remained  silent,  lost  in 
reverie. 

"Ah,  free  schools,"  broke  in  Heloise,  "are 
necessary  to  discipline  the  minds  of  the  young 
and  to  lay  the  foundation  of  an  education. 
Free  libraries  are  useful  to  our  literary  class 
and  people  who  have  more  or  less  leisure  at 
their  command,  only  I  wish  that  they  might  all 
be  founded  by  the  people  themselves,  like  the 
famous  library  at  Boston.  However,  it  is  a 


294  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

fact  that  the  newspaper  has  come  to  reign 
supreme  as  an  educator  of  our  adult,  busy 
people.  But  our  press  is  not  free!  It  is  owned 
and  controlled  largely  by  our  capitalist  class, 
which  also  has  paramount  influence  over  our 
Government.  It  stands  to  reason  that  such  a 
press  will  not  instruct  the  people  in  respect  to 
their  own  interests  —  neither  is  our  present 
Government  fit  to  protect  these  interests.  In- 
deed, our  press  is  becoming  more  and  more 
imperialistic  in  its  teaching,  when  it  deigns  to 
teach  anything.  Its  present  tendency  is  to 
amuse  rather  than  to  instruct.  If  anything 
serious  .is  taking  place  or  about  to  take  place, 
in  which  thousands  of  the  people's  lives  and 
millions  of  the  people's  money  may  be  jeopar- 
dized, or  lost  —  such  as  a  war — then  how  much 
confidence  can  be  placed  in  what  one  reads  ?" 

"  But  how  can  this  difficulty  of  a  misleading 
press,  which  prefers  to  treat  the  people  to  cir- 
cuses rather  than  to  plain  truth,  and  to  extol 
charity  rather  than  stand  for  justice,  be  gotten 
over  ?  The  equipment  of  a  big  daily  paper  is  a 
very  expensive  affair.  The  people  will  hesitate 
long  about  adding  to  their  taxes  in  order  to  es- 
tablish a  free  press  in  addition  to  free  schools." 

Heloise  paused  a  moment  before  replying. 
She  gazed  in  an  abstracted  manner  into  the  eyes 
of  Abel,  and  he  returned  her  gaze  with  a  smile. 
It  rather  pleased  him  to  see  that  a  woman  could 


A   GODDESS    OF    LIBERTY 

soar  to  heights  which  were  not  of  a  personal 
nature;  to  be  lost,  as  it  were,  in  infinity. 

Presently  she  said,  "The  truth  is,  man  by 
nature  is  a  monopolist.  Woman  goes  to  the 
other  extreme  and  withholds  nothing  from  those 
she  loves,  so  that  on  the  one  hand  we  have  the 
one  sex  seeking  all  and  the  other  sex  yielding 
all.  Of  course,  there  are  many  exceptions,  men 
who  are  quite  as  self-sacrificing  as  women,  and 
clear-sighted  women  who  see  that  to  yield  all 
to  the  control  of  man  is  to  betray  the  interests 
of  the  race." 

"Then  you  are  not  thinking  of  giving  your 
millions  to  some  municipality  in  order  to  aid  in 
the  establishment  of  a  free  press  for  at  least  a 
fragment  of  the  people  ?" 

"Oh,  I  have  thought  of  it!  but  suppose  I  were 
to  do  this  and  the  gift  were  accepted;  the  paper 
would  be  run  by  men  and  we  should  have  a 
partisan  kind  of  a  paper,  much  like  those  that 
exist  to-day.  From  the  beginning  man  has 
tried  to  run  things  alone  and  he  has  never  given 
us,  and  in  the  nature  of  things  cannot  give  us — 
either  a  free,  non-partisan  press,  or  a  govern- 
ment of  the  people  —  for  the  obvious  reason 
that  he  alone  does  not  constitute  the  people! 
With  only  half  of  the  divine  elements  active  in 
his  breast  he  cannot  even  truly  represent  them. 
Am  I  not  right?" 

Heloise  asked  this  question  with  a  very  win- 


296 

ning  smile,  fearing  that  reason  alone  would  not 
induce  him  to  accept  views  which  he  must 
lately,  as  an  orthodox  minister,  have  regarded 
with  suspicion. 

"What  an  insatiable  young  woman  you  are, 
Heloise!  Having  got  me  to  change  the  religion 
bequeathed  me  by  my  ancestors,  you  now  de- 
sire me  to  change  my  politics!" 

"  Bequeathed  by  the  same  ancestors,"  added 
Heloise  quickly,  "and  equally  monopolistic  in 
spirit  and  tendency.  The  one  tends  to  revert 
to  religious  autocracy,  having  for  its  head  the 
Pope,  the  other  to  a  political  autocracy,  led  by 
some  strenuous,  gifted  man  of  the  military  or 
millionaire  type.  Cecil  Rhodes  lately  ruled 
England,  and  a  strenuous  group  of  millionaires 
rule  our  country,  behind  our  figureheads.  But 
I  see  you  are  tired.  Abelard,  I  am  desperately 
in  earnest,  and  if  my  gropings  after  light  weary 
you,  do  not  scruple  to  call  a  halt." 

"  Your  voice  is  music  to  me,  even  in  argument, 
Heloise,  though  I  never  sought  argument  for  its 
own  sake  —  doubtless  because  I  am  poor  at  it. 
Some  one  has  said  that  preachers  make  poor 
debaters,  because  they  cannot  get  accustomed  to 
being  contradicted.  I  feel  the  truth  of  it." 

"  It  may  have  a  touch  of  truth,  most  aphor- 
isms have,  but  it  is  nice  of  you  to  turn  a  phrase 
like  that  instead  of  boldly  telling  me  you  are 
tired  to  death  of  my  earnestness.  Ah,  Abelard, 


A    GODDESS    OF    LIBERTY  297 

man  has  broadened  'with  the  progress  of  the 
sun'  since  the  time  that  Bouchet  was  not 
ashamed  to  write,  'From  a  braying  mule  and 
a  girl  who  speaks  Latin,  Good  Lord  deliver 
us!" 

They  both  laughed  heartily  at  this.  Then 
Abel  said:  "After  you  have  decided  what  is  best 
to  do  with  your  millions,  you  will  rest  a  little 
from  big  problems  and  become  commonplace 
for  my  sake,  won't  you,  Heloise  ?" 

"Yes,  Abel,  I  may  yet  turn  out  the  coziest 
kind  of  a  housewife.  But  I  can  do  something 
for  you  in  that  line  even  now.  You  have  prob- 
ably been  taking  long  walks  in  this  lovely  town. 
Let  me  ring  for  Nettie  and  her  tray." 

He  came  towards  her  and  grasped  her  hand. 
She  covered  his  hand  with  her  own  disengaged 
one  and  pressing  it  warmly  said:  "Go  right 
back  and  sit  decorously  opposite  me,  Abel, 
while  we  talk." 


CHAPTER  XXII 
ABELARD'S  APPEAL 


"ACCORDING  to  Mr.  Carnegie,  the  existence  of 
millionaires  is  the  best  gauge  of  the  prosperity  of  the 
mass  of  the  people.  The  condition  of  the  masses,  he 
says,  is  satisfactory  just  as  the  country  is  blessed  with 
millionaires.  That  is  a  fine  paradox  which  Mr.  Car- 
negie would  be  pushed  to  defend,  if  we  were  to  test  it, 
say  by  the  condition  of  the  Roman  populace  in  the 
days  preceding  the  sack  of  Rome  by  Alaric  the  Goth. 
The  chief  feature  in  Roman  society  in  that  degenerate 
age  was  the  enormous  fortunes  of  the  millionaires  of 
the  senate.  Gibbon  tells  us  that  the  senators  had 
incomes  from  their  estates  amounting  to  three  or  four 
hundred  thousand  pounds  per  annum.  The  Roman 
Senate  was  even  more  a  rich  man's  club  than  is  the 
senate  of  Washington.  But  were  the  masses  of  the 
people  ever  more  degraded  or  demoralized  than  in 
the  days  when  millionaires  abounded  in  the  capital 
of  the  Old  World  ? "  —  W.  T.  Stead.  . 


XXII 


Abelard's  Appeal 

* 

'T~l  7ELL,  I  am  waiting  to  learn  what  you  pur- 

V  V  pose  doingwith  those  millions,  if  charity 
is  to  play  no  part  in  their  distribution?"  Abel 
said  tentatively. 

Nettie  had  just  departed  with  the  tray  when 
he  asked  this  question.  He  was  really  eager  to 
learn  what  his  Heloise  contemplated  doing  in 
her  novel  and  complex  situation;  besides  it  was 
late  and  he  feared  she  might  send  him  home. 
He  must,  therefore,  interest  her  in  such  a  manner 
that  she  would  forget  the  flight  of  time. 

"  I  have  not  decided  upon  anything  —  not 
even  whether  millionaires  are  a  blessing  or  a 
curse  to  a  country.  It  is  my  impression,  though, 
that  America  is  overdoing  the  millionaire  busi- 
ness, and  should  study  now  how  not  to  make 
millionaires,  and  also  how  to  regain  her  lost 
power  in  governmental  affairs. " 

Heloise  spoke  with  eager  interest  and  all 
traces  of  fatigue  disappeared  as  by  magic. 

Abel  smiled  at  his  success  and  began  to  re- 
gard himself  as  a  diplomat  of  no  mean  order. 
He  readjusted  his  newly  nourished  body  in  his 
armchair  as  if  he  had  taken  on  a  new  lease  of 
301 


3O2  ABELARD   AND    HELOISE 

time.  In  fact,  so  pleased  was  he  with  the  suc- 
cess of  his  ruse  that  he  lost  track  of  what  Heloise 
was  saying  and  was  obliged  to  admit  the  fact. 

"  Forgive  me,"  he  begged,  "  my  mind  wanders 
occasionally  to-night.  The  fact  is  that  you  are 
so  distractingly  beautiful  that  I  find  myself  now 
and  then  in  a  state  of  adoration  when  I  should  be 
mentally  alert;  since  not  every  day  is  one  called 
upon  to  decide  the  fate  of  millions." 

"  I  said  I  thought  America  was  overdoing  the 
millionaire-making  business  and  should  study 
how  not  to  make  them  and  at  the  same  time  re- 
gain her  lost  —  or  pretty  nearly  lost  —  con- 
trol of  governmental  affairs." 

"  Right  you  are,  my  Heloise.  But  now,  while 
I  am  interested  in  my  country's  affairs,  so  much 
so  that  I  shall  take  the  trouble  to  vote  in  the 
future  - 

"What!  Do  you  mean  to  say  that  you  have 
not  exercised  your  sacred  privilege  of  casting 
your  ballot  in  the  past  ?" 

"Dear  Love,  if  you  only  knew  how  arduous 
are  the  duties  of  a  sincere  minister  of  the  Gospel 
with  a  big  congregation  on  his  hands,  you  would 
not  be  astonished  when  I  admit  that  I  have  had 
no  time  to  inform  myself  either  on  the  great 
issues  of  the  day  or  to  make  myself  acquainted, 
even  in  a  cursory  manner,  with  the  merits  or 
demerits  of  the  selected  candidates.  Most  of  the 
men  I  know  vote  blindly  with  their  party.  'My 


ABELARD'S  APPEAL  303 

party,  right  or  wrong,'  is  their  watchword. 
By  birth  and  breeding  I  am  a  Republican,  and 
before  I  became  a  minister  I  voted  always  the 
Republican  ticket,  but  lately  it  has  seemed  to 
me  that  my  party  has  stood  for  the  concentra- 
tion of  capital  into  the  hands  of  the  few- 
whether  meaning  to  do  so  or  not  —  until  it  has 
become  a  menace  to  the  liberties  of  the  American 
people.  With  that  notion  in  my  head  —  which 
I  had  not  time  to  either  corroborate  or  dispel  - 
I  have  of  late  years  refused  to  vote  at  all.  My 
sin  has  been  one  of  omission  rather  than  one  of 
commission." 

"Ah,  my  poor  Abelard!  You  must  treat  your- 
self to  a  long  vacation  in  order  to  catch  up  with 
modern  civilization." 

Abel  indulged  in  a  hearty  laugh  and  suc- 
ceeded in  firing  a  tiny  pellet  of  paper  very  close 
to  Heloise's  pink  ear.  Then  he  asked  with  a 
merry  twinkle  in  his  eye : 

"How  long  a  vacation  do  you  think  I  shall 
need  in  order  to  catch  up  with  modern  civil- 
ization ?" 

"Oh,  with  your  naturally  good  mind,  which  is 
now  quite  alert,  two  or  three  years  of  freedom 
should  enable  you  to  bring  public  questions  up 
to  date  and  to  see  the  world  to  boot.  Very  busy 
men  and  women,  who  have  got  into  narrow 
ruts  of  thinking  and  feeling,  ought  to  treat  them- 


304  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

selves  to  long  vacations  now  and  then,  in  order 
to  enlarge  their  usefulness." 

"Why  can  we  not,  both  of  us,  join  some  world- 
touring  group  of  people  and  see  this  little  spotty 
globe  together?"  suggested  he  impetuously. 
"Come,  say  yes!  it  would  be  the  next  best  thing 
to  getting  married  and  making  for  ourselves  a 
new  and  unique  kind  of  paradise  in  which  the 
Devil  of  Discontent  should  be  securely  barred 
out."  Abel  rose  quickly,  his  face  aflame  with 
love,  and  held  out  his  hands  towards  her  in  a 
beseeching  attitude.  He  dared  not  approach 
closer  lest  he  should  forget  himself,  and  that,  he 
knew,  would  spell  ruin  to  any  hope  of  her  agree- 
ing to  such  a  plan  as  he  suggested. 

A  look  of  pain  swept  over  the  usually  serene 
face  of  Heloise  as  she  said:  "My  dear  Abelard, 
please  sit  down  and  let  us  talk  the  matter  over 
calmly.  Only  in  that  way  can  the  still  small 
voice  of  reason  make  itself  heard.  But  before 
we  try  to  think  whether  it  would  be  well  for  the 
reputation  and  character  of  two  such  lovers  as 
you  and  I  to  place  ourselves  in  a  situation  which 
would  involve  us  in  almost  hourly  contact,  ex- 
tremely close  at  times,  let  me  ask  you  one  ques- 
tion :  Do  you  believe  I  ought  to  leave  my  post  ? 
Please  bear  in  mind  that  I  am  in  the  best  of 
health,  that  my  life  has  been  one  of  preparation, 
and  that  as  yet  I  have  done  nothing.  You,  on 
the  contrary,  have  lived  a  life  of  toil,  ten  years 


ABELARD'S  APPEAL  305 

of  which  have  been  sufficiently  full  of  grave  re- 
sponsibilities and  crushing  duties  to  kill  most 
men  by  the  time  they  arrive  at  middle  age. 
Then  in  addition  to  my  never  having  done  any- 
thing to  warrant  a  long  vacation  —  or  a  short 
one,  for  that  matter  —  Providence  has  seen  fit 
to  place  at  my  disposal  several  millions  of  our 
people's  money;  a  large  amount,  as  things  go, 
and  carrying  with  it  a  good  deal  of  actual  power. 
Having  accepted  this  sceptre,  I  should,  it  seems 
to  me,  lose  no  time  in  learning  how  to  wield  it  — 
so  long  as  it  is  mine  —  to  the  best  advantage  of 
as  many  people  as  possible." 

Abel,  who  had  remained  standing  during 
this  little  speech,  now  seated  himself  with  a  pen- 
sive, almost  mournful  air. 

"I  suppose  you  are  right,  Heloise,"  he  said 
at  last,  "and  yet  how  can  we  bear  that  long 
separation  ?  Two  or  three  years!  It  seems  an 
eternity!  Our  hearts  will  have  bled  themselves 
dry  long  before  that  time  is  past.  We  may  be- 
come automatons,  like  so  many  people  we  see 
about  us.  Or  perhaps  I  shall  be  housed  in  an 
insane  asylum.  How  does  that  prospect  please 
you?" 

Heloise  found  it  impossible  not  to  smile, 
though  her  smile  was  pensive. 

"Oh,  you  are  too  well  balanced  and  have  too 
much  common  sense  to  go  insane.  I  will  turn 
prophet  for  a  change  and  predict  that  you 


306  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

will  find  the  two  or  three  years  spent  abroad 
the  most  fruitful  and  happy  of  your  whole 
existence." 

"Impossible!  You  do  not  know  what  you  are 
talking  about,  Heloise.  Look  into  your  own 
heart  and  put  by  your  Spartan  concealment  and 
tell  me  frankly,  how  does  this  long  separation 
strike  you  ?  Do  you  expect  to  be  happy,  with 
immense  stretches  of  land  and  water  between 
us?" 

"  Dear  Abelard,  I  expect  to  be  very  busy  — 
and  at  intervals  very  happy  —  when  looking 
at  the  infinite  and  varied  beauty  of  this  world 
and  learning  through  you  of  the  wonderful 
things  man  has  done  in  the  Old  World.  Think 
of  your  trained  eye  and  eloquent  pen!  Ah,  yes, 
once  a  week  I  expect  to  revel  in  the  happiness 
of  a  letter  from  your  hand,  the  contents  to  be 
absorbed  by  my  heart." 

Abel's  countenance  underwent  a  swift  change. 
The  pain  disappeared  and  a  look  of  tenderness 
replaced  it  —  so  beaming  and  persistent  that 
the  woman  he  loved  flushed  a  rosy  pink. 

Presently,  he  broke  the  spell  by  asking 
abruptly,  "You  have  not  yet  given  me  any  real 
hint,  notwithstanding  our  two  long  talks,  of  how 
you  are  to  disperse  those  millions,  as  it  appears 
that  you  are  not  inclined  to  be  charitable  with 
them." 


ABELARD'S  APPEAL  307 

She  treated  him  to  one  of  her  archest  smiles 
as  she  said: 

"No,  charity  is  the  petted  darling  of  the  multi- 
millionaire, and  I  shall  not  make  a  business 
of  it." 

Abel  smiled  a  curious  sort  of  smile,  which 
made  her  pause  and  regard  him  with  the  ques- 
tion marks  in  her  eyes.  As  he  did  not  enlighten 
her  she  felt  constrained  to  say,  "You  seem 
greatly  amused  at  something  in  connection  with 
me,  but  I  am  at  a  loss  to  guess  what  it  is.  Tell 
me  and  let  us  share  the  fun  together." 

"It  is  impossible.  How  can  you  see  how 
very  incongruous  you  look,  trying  to  wed  your- 
self to  any  business  —  you,  with  your  sweet, 
Madonna  countenance  and  lips  made  to  be 
kissed  and  to  kiss  in  return.  Heloise,  my  own 
sweet  love,  give  your  millions  away,  quickly, 
and  have  done  with  them!  They  will  soil  you 
and  perhaps  spoil  you  if  they  linger  in  your  life. 
God  meant  you  to  be  a  perfect  wife  and  a  de- 
voted mother.  Why  not  be  true  to  yourself, 
true  to  your  real  vocation  ? " 

Heloise  slowly  but  firmly  shook  her  head. 

"  Because  the  way  is  barred  by  a  flaming 
sword  which  flashes  itself  in  every  direction. 
The  name  of  that  flaming  sword  is  sex-monopoly. 
I  mean  to  do  what  I  can  with  the  means  at  my 
command  to  annihilate  this  obstacle,  which 
bars  out  mankind  from  paradise." 


308  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

Abel  sighed.  His  presentiment  had  come 
true.  Aloud  he  said: 

"A  big  order,  and  one  that  will  keep  us  as  far 
apart  as  that  Abelard  and  Heloise  whose  pa- 
thetic story  has  moved  the  world  —  for  sex- 
monopoly  will  die  hard.  It  was  established, 
according  to  the  Bible,  with  the  first  couple, 
and  it  has  been  in  constant  practice  ever  since." 

"And  man  has  known  no  real  peace  during 
all  that  time,"  she  added  promptly.  "In  fact, 
it  is  the  basis  of  all  monopolies,  for  monopoly  is 
greed  for  control.  Ah,  Abelard,  mio,  you  will 
help  me  to  stand  bravely  and  use  my  power 
perseveringly  for  the  equality  of  the  sexes  at  the 
marriage  altar  ?" 

"Heloise,  don't  you  take  that  question  too 
seriously  ?" 

"Abelard,  if  men  and  women  are  ever  to  be 
serious  in  anything  that  is  the  time  and  the 
place.  With  the  single  exception  of  the  hour 
when  Death  approaches,  it  is  the  most  serious 
moment  in  life." 

After  a  pause  —  "  But  dearest,  we  could  work 
so  much  better  together." 

He  left  his  seat  and  approached  her.  His 
dark  eyes  were  glowing.  She  was  seated  near 
the  table,  tapping  it  lightly  with  her  pencil. 
Heloise  had  lost  some  of  her  usual  tranquillity, 
and  she  apprehended  some  trying  scenes  which 
she  well  knew  would  be  fatal  to  the  immediate 


ABELARD'S  APPEAL  309 

peace  of  both.  Besides,  she  distrusted  herself. 
How  could  she  always  turn  a  deaf  ear  to  tones 
so  tender  and  glances  so  full  of  love,  —  love  so 
pathetic  and  pleading,  even  when  only  his  eyes 
spoke  for  him,  that  her  heart  turned  traitor  to 
her  stern  resolve  and  her  mind  searched  for  rea- 
sons to  make  her  comply  with  his  wishes.  Ah, 
how  easy,  how  tempting  for  woman  to  become 
the  slave  of  the  man  she  adores  and  purchase 
bliss  by  spoiling  her  mate.  For  no  man  long 
loves  a  wife  willing  to  play  the  part  of  vassal  in 
his  life.  Often  he  prefers  the  society  of  a  mis- 
tress to  such  compliance. 

When  Abelard  had  approached  close,  so  close 
that  one  look  of  yielding  love  would  have  placed 
her  completely  in  his  power,  she  arose  with  her 
newly  assumed  business  air,  glanced  at  her 
watch  and  said  with  firmness: 

"Abelard  ra/o,  just  see  what  time  it  is!  We 
must  at  once  separate  for  needed  rest.  Good- 
night, caro.  Come  again  to-morrow  night  and 
I  will  tell  you  definitely  what  I  propose  to  do 
with  my  inheritance.  You  will  yield  an  atten- 
tive ear  I  am  sure.  For  I  have  observed  that 
so  long  as  two  persons  are  lovers  they  are  good 
listeners  —  to  each  other." 

'Then  you  think  your  words  would  fall  on  a 
barred  mind  if  we  were  married  ?" 

He  was  holding  the  hand  he  had  secured  as  if 
he  meant  to  retain  it  forever. 


3IO  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

"Why  not?  Why  should  you  care  to  listen 
to  one  whom  the  law  places  beneath  you,  and  to 
whom  you  promise  to  play  the  part  of  a  master. 
Masters  are  notoriously  impatient  of  anything 
like  comradeship  with  their  inferiors.  But 
once  more,  good-night,  Abelard!  If  separa- 
tions are  hard  to  bear,  recall  how  sweet  are  our 
meetings.  To-morrow  night  I  shall  be  awaiting 
you  with  a  heart  full  of  the  tenderest  love." 

"Dear  Heloise,"  he  said  as  he  turned  sadly 
away,  "your  professions  of  love  but  mock  my 
ardor.  The  unknown  masses  of  our  people 
stand  between  us.  I  am  afraid  I  shall  never  be 
able  to  rise  to  your  altruistic  heights." 


CHAPTER  XXIII 

THE  STORM 


"TO-NIGHT  God  knows  what  things  shall  tide, 
The  earth  is  racked  and  faint  — 

Expectant,  sleepless,  open-eyed; 

And  we  who  from  the  earth  were  made, 

Thrill  with  our  mother's  pain." 

"THE  lack  of  the  people  is  not  the  lack  of  intel- 
ligence, of  knowledge,  of  experience,  not  a  lack  of 
mind  or  of  body,  for  physical  culture  has  made  a 
long  stride  in  a  single  decade,  and  the  strong  soul  in 
the  strong  body  is  no  longer  an  exceptional  sight. 
The  lack  of  our  civilization  is  not  the  lack  of  faith 
only.  It  is  the  lack  of  spirituality.  The  things  that 
are  seen  have  encroached  upon  the  things  that  are 
unseen  and  spiritual."  —  Mary  Clemmer. 

"ONE  wonders  why  men  and  women  are  so  afraid 
of  entering  into  the  fullest  possible  relations  of  life,  of 
opening  their  minds  to  every  sort  of  truth,  of  spending 
and  being  spent  for  the  sake  of  others,  of  cultivating 
sympathetic  relations  with  all  classes."  —  Helen 
Bigelow  Merriman. 

"HE  that  will  not  stir  until  he  infallibly  knows  that 
the  business  he  goes  about  will  succeed  will  have  but 
little  else  to  do  but  to  sit  still  and  perish." — John 
Locke, 


«>3^^ 


XXIII 


The  Storm 


"  TT  7OMEN  who  feel  much  and  think  little 
V  V  spend  and  are  spent  on  charity  in  some 
of  its  many  disguised  forms.  Women  who  think 
much  and  feel  little  are  apt  to  imitate  my  own 
sex  and  deal  with  life  and  money  in  a  purely  am- 
bitious spirit.  You  both  think  and  feel,  and 
luck  has  dowered  you  while  young  with  a  great 
fortune.  I  begin  to  be  very  curious  as  to  how 
you  will  dispose  of  it  ?  " 

Abel  and  Heloise  were  sitting  nearer  together 
than  usual;  he  in  a  big  armchair  near  the  center 
table;  she  with  a  pencil  in  the  hand  which  rested 
on  the  table.  She  was  dressed  precisely  the 
same  as  the  evening  before,  only  instead  of  roses 
there  were  violets  pinned  on  her  bodice.  She 
wore  no  jewelry;  not  because  she  did  not  admire 
beautiful  things  made  of  gold  and  silver  and 
precious  stones,  but  merely  because  she  had  not 
yet  recovered  from  the  severity  of  her  father's 
training,  and  the  influence  of  a  certain  Spartan 
New  England  cult  whose  ethics  unconsciously 
shaped  her  daily  habits  of  thought  and  action. 

The  day  had  been  lowering  and  now  with 
night  had  come  the  indications  of  a  storm.  In- 

3'3 


314  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

stead  of  replying  immediately  to  Abel's  ques- 
tion, Heloise  said: 

"Tell  me  first,  dear,  how  you  would  redis- 
tribute this  large  accumulation  of  property,  sup- 
posing you  had  fallen  heir  to  it,  instead  of.  me  ?" 

"That  would  have  been  an  easy  question  to 
answer  six  months  ago.  I  should  have  used  it 
to  spread  the  religion  of  Christ  —  or  what  goes 
by  that  name.  Now  that  so  much  connected 
with  the  name  seems  to  me  absurd  and  childish 
and  fatal  to  human  progress,  I  am  at  a  loss  to 
know  what  I  should  do  with  it.  Possibly  I 
might  become  an  imitator  of  Mr.  Carnegie  in  a 
small  way,  and  use  my  money  to  assist  the  people 
in  getting  easy  access  to  libraries,  museums,  and 
art  galleries,  for  books,  pictures,  music  and 
architecture  are  all  civilizing  agents  and  help  to 
lift  man  out  of  the  mire  and  prepare  him  for 
fuller  spiritual  developments." 

"Yes,  no  doubt,  money  spent  in  that  way  is 
not  misspent.  But  is  it  not  true  that  before  the 
people  at  large  can  rightly  make  use  of  these 
civilizing  agencies,  they  must  secure  the  pre- 
cious gift  of  more  freedom  from  beastly  toil  ?" 

Neither  of  the  lovers  spoke  for  a  moment,  but 
simply  gazed  thoughtfully  into  each  other's  eyes. 
Finally  Abel  said  very  seriously: 

"I  begin  to  understand.  You  propose  to 
spend  your  millions  in  the  endeavor  to  secure 
more  liberty  for  the  people." 


THE    STORM  315 

"Abelard,  dear,  you  are  a  seer,  and  likely  to 
make  a  latter-day  prophet  after  you  have  spent 
your  forty  days  in  the  wilderness  of  Europe, 
Asia,  and  Africa.  At  any  rate  you  have  guessed 
my  secret.  My  millions  are  to  be  spent  in  the 
cause  of  more  liberty!" 

Abel  threw  the  hair  off  his  forehead  and  gave 
Heloise  a  mischievous  glance. 

O 

"I  read  only  to-day,"  he  said,  "that  liberty 
such  as  people  believed  in  half  a  century  ago  is 
bankrupt." 

"Oh,  that  is  nothing.  Liberty  has  been  in  a 
state  of  chronic  bankruptcy  ever  since  the  world 
began." 

"But  the  situation  is  really  serious  this  time, 
for  what  we  know  as  monopoly  —  and  our 
fathers  knew  as  Mammon  —  orders  govern- 
ments and  press  to  do  his  bidding,  and  has  se- 
cured in  addition  the  ceaseless  and  often  deadly 
activity  of  countless  machines  to  serve  his  in- 
terests and  make  of  him  a  god  to  whom  the 
people  must  bow  and  cringe." 

Abel  sighed,  while  Heloise,  whom  nothing 
seemed  to  daunt,  replied: 

"All  true  gods,  whether  in  the  flesh  or  other- 
wise, work  for  the  good  of  the  people,  and  if 
these  new  captains  of  industry  do  not  thus  work 
they  are  false  gods  which  should  not  have  the 
suffrages  of  the  people.  The  test  of  godship 
is  —  does  the  god  bring  the  people  more  and 


316  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

fuller  life,  or  does  he  deprive  them  of  it  for  his 
own  personal  gain." 

"Ah,  but  the  point  is  to  get  the  people  to 
realize  who  among  them  are  true  gods  and  who 
are  false.  They  are  as  puzzled  now  as  in  the 
time  of  Christ,  and  in  the  meantime  the  spirit  of 
Monopoly  is  enslaving  them  in  a  more  deadly 
manner  than  ever  before,  and  the  true  friends 
of  the  people  are  mercilessly  silenced  in  one  way 
or  in  another." 

"Thank  heaven,  it  is  not  possible  to  crucify 
the  good  to-day  or  slaughter  the  innocent!" 
returned  Heloise  with  an  optimistic  smile. 

"How  about  our  modern  concentration  camps, 
which  destroy  women  and  children  by  the  thou- 
sands ?" 

Abelard  was  in  a  very  cynical  mood,  having 
spent  the  day  in  studying  the  political  situation, 
He  had  been  preaching  Christ  and  Him  cruci- 
fied so  faithfully  for  years  past  that  he  was  quite 
ignorant  of  much  that  was  taking  place  under 
his  eyes.  He  was  now  bent  on  enlightening 
himself  and  his  first  draught  of  knowledge  had 
been  a  bitter  one. 

"Oh,  let  us  put  the  dreadful  pictures  of  lust  of 
gold  out  of  our  minds  and  consider  how  best 
to  educate  the  people  to  look  after  their  own 
interests  —  teach  them  not  to  intrust  them  so 
completely  to  self-seekers.  Sometimes  it  seems 
to  me  that  people  really  tempt  men  to  become 


THE    STORM  317 

tyrants  by  being  so  helpless,  so  servile,  so 
ignorant.  It  was  once  my  business  to  hand 
around  a  petition  of  a  political  nature.  I  don't 
know  how  many  men  who  pass  for  good  and 
intelligent  citizens  told  me  they  never  meddled 
with  politics.  'It  is  a  filthy  pool,  better  keep 
clear  of  it/  they  said.  Such  people  ought  to  be 
well  ground  under  the  heel  of  tyranny,  until 
they  are  willing  to  take  their  proper  share  in 
governing  the  nation  —  which  is  themselves  " 

"Yes,  but  who  has  taught  them  it  is  a  filthy 
pool,  and  who  has  advised  them  to  let  politics 
alone?" 

"Ah,  Abelard,  every  word  you  speak  to-night 
makes  me  more  convinced  that  I  have  made  a 
good  choice  as  to  how  employ,  or  perhaps  sink, 
my  millions.  I  mean  to  establish  a  paper  which 
shall  be  independent,  unprejudiced;  where 
people  can  find  something  like  the  truth,  and 
whose  editorials  shall  discuss  both  sides  of  every 
question  in  an  impartial  spirit." 

"Ah!"  said  Abel  after  a  pause.  "Will  you 
produce  a  big  Sunday  paper?" 

Abel  put  this  question  tentatively.  He  was 
not  sure  but  that  Heloise,  with  her  dislike  of 
orthodoxy,  might  think  it  no  sin  to  utilize  the 
one  day  in  the  week  which  custom  has  delivered 
into  the  hands  of  the  clergy  for  the  planting  of 
spiritual  seed. 

"As  I  intend  my  paper  to  fight  monopoly  in 


318  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

all  its  many  disguises  and  ramifications  it  would 
not  be  consistent  for  me  to  play  the  part  of 
monopolist  myself  and  issue  it  every  day  in  the 
week.  Besides,  it  would  not  be  in  good  taste 
for  a  woman  manager  of  a  daily  paper  to  issue 
a  big  commercial  edition  on  the  Sabbath. 
Women  are  nothing  if  not  religious." 

"  But  the  people  appear  to  like  the  big  Sunday 
paper  which  capitalism  prepares  for  them. 
They  buy  immense  quantities  of  that  sort  of 
bait." 

"True,  they  have  done  so.  I  think,  however, 
they  are  beginning  to  realize  that  the  capitalist 
press  has  been  largely  their  undoing.  I  believe 
that  if  excellent  six-day  papers  are  established 
they  will  patronize  them.  They  will  eventually 
come  to  understand  that  no  secular  paper  which 
monopolizes  every  day  in  the  week  can  success- 
fully fight  Monopoly.  Ah,"  said  Heloise,  with 
sudden  energy,  "what  a  desecration  of  the  dawn 
of  a  quiet  Sunday  morning  is  this  unloading  of 
cart-loads  — " 

"Car-loads,"  interposed  Abel. 

"You  are  right  —  of  car-loads  of  worldliness 

O 

on  the  still  wearied  people!" 

"Yet,  they  will  buy  it  —  by  the  car-loads  — 
and  read  it  to  more  than  weariness  —  to  stu- 
pidity!" Abel  spoke  as  if  disgusted  more  with 
the  people  than  with  that  insinuating  Sunday 
morning  visitor  —  the  big  newspaper. 


THE    STORM  319 

"  Oh,  it  is  tempting  bait,  Abel.  It  lies  there 
on  your  threshold,  ready  to  entice  you  the  mo- 
ment you  open  your  door.  It  is  so  gay  with 
colored  inks,  so  artistic  with  cleverly  drawn  pic- 
tures —  and  the  people  are  naturally  so  curious. 
They  wonder  what  new  thing  they  shall  see, 
what  new  idea  find  —  and  the  law-breakers, 
what  mischief  are  they  brewing  or  accomplish- 
ing? If  in  society,  or  aping  it,  they  want  to 
see  how  new  gowns  are  going  to  be  made;  they 
want  to  learn  where  the  milliners  are  and  what 
they  are  doing.  If  athletic,  the  sporting  por- 
tion of  the  paper  entices  them  to  scan  its  columns 
at  breakfast,  retarding  their  digestion.  Many 
a  woman  bent  on  acquiring  a  good  complexion 
or  a  handsome  figure  cannot  put  the  tempta- 
tion by,  and  wait  till  the  morrow  to  pay  atten- 
tion to  the  things  of  the  flesh,  but  uses  the  Sun- 
day rest  for  it.  And  the  dear  little  children, 
who  have  frolicked  all  the  week!  they,  too,  can- 
not wait  till  another  day  comes,  but  must  pore 
over  four  pages  of  horse-play  in  crude  colors. 
As  for  the  pounds  of  advertisements  and  highly 
spiced  news  unloaded,  that  is  also  absorbed  by 
hundreds  of  thousands  of  weary  workers  and 
men  and  women  already  dead  to  spiritual  in- 
fluences. 

"I  mean  to  get  out  a  gay,  rollicking,  worldly 
paper,  full  of  amusement  and  sport,  on  Saturday. 
On  Sunday,  I  shall  let  the  ministers  have  a  clear 


32O  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

field,  so  far  as  my  paper  is  concerned.  Then 
on  Monday,  being  a  woman  and  therefore  a 
lover  of  the  clergy  and  their  ways,  I  mean  to 
still  further  encourage  the  ministers,  who  are 
now  buried  under  an  avalanche  of  Sunday 
papers.  That  is,  the  progressive  ones,  the  more 
advanced  thinkers,  who  keep  in  touch  with 
the  times.  Those  who  want  to  give  to  the  read- 
ers of  this  anti-monopoly  sheet  their  sermons 
of  the  previous  day,  boiled  down,  can  do  so;  and 
they  shall  be  well  paid  for  their  work,  if 
accepted." 

Abel  got  up  and  walked  about  the  room  with 
a  meditative  air.  She  watched  him,  wondering 
what  was  in  his  mind.  Presently,  he  stood  be- 
fore her  and  said  with  very  great  anxiety: 

"I  don't  know  but  that  you  will  find  your 
newspaper  project  a  quick  method  of  redis- 
tributing your  large  fortune,  but  that  does  not 
alarm  me  as  much  as  the  fear  that  it  will  mar 
your  charming  personality  and  wreck  your 
health." 

"Oh,  if  one  makes  up  his  mind  to  do  some- 
thing worthy  in  the  interest  of  the  people,  he 
should  be  willing  to  risk  the  ruin  of  both  purse 
and  health." 

She  smiled  into  Abel's  eyes  reassuringly.  She 
had  evidently  counted  the  cost  of  her  under- 
taking and  was  ready  to  pay  it. 

"It  must  be  done,"  she  said  enthusiastically; 


THE    STORM  321 

"if  not  by  the  woman  of  America,  then  by  a 
woman  of  America.  I  was  examining,  only 
this  afternoon,  a  page  advertisement  of  next 
Sunday's  edition  of  a  great  metropolitan  paper. 
The  star  feature  is  to  be  the  '  Burning  Love 
Letters,'  written  to  a  notorious  French  ballet- 
dancer,  by  *  Kings,  Princes,  Dukes,  Aristocrats ' 
(a  nice  distinction), '  and  other  celebrities.'  The 
next  important  items  are  to  be  'Your  Com- 
plexion,' by  a  well-advertised  Italian  expert, 
and  'Your  Autumn  Gowns,'  by  a  fashionable 
New  York  dressmaker.  Then  the  'full  details' 
of  the  newest  romance  in  the  life  of  a  popular 
New  York  actress,  and,  as  a  fitting  climax  to 
the  so-called  adult  part  of  this  intellectual  treat, 
a  'music  supplement,'  'The  Newest  Song  Hit' 
-  '  I  Ain't  Coin'  to  Mat-a  Loo-Loo  -  '  words 
and  music." 

"Good!"  said  Abel.  "Very  typical." 
"And  the  'children  are  not  forgotten,'  as  the 
advertisement  says,"  added  Heloise.  "I  could 
wish  that  they  were!  For  their  little  blase  brains 
are  pictures  of  the  latest  fashions  in  'Smart 
School  Clothes,'  and  enough  puzzles  and  games 
and  'cut-outs'  to  occupy  their  dear  minds  all 
day,  to  the  exclusion  of  better  thoughts  or 
reading." 

She  then  outlined  to  him  her  plan  for  cul- 
tivating sympathetic  relations  with  all  classes, 
and  for  surrounding  herself  with  the  best  of  as- 


322  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

sistance,  and  for  giving  her  co-workers  the  sort 
of  inducement  which  would  call  forth  their 
noblest  efforts.  She  planned  to  establish  her 
paper  in  Chicago,  which  she  looked  upon  as  the 
heart  of  the  United  States.  Those  of  its  citizens 
whom  monopoly  had  deprived  of  the  where- 
withal to  pay  for  a  daily  paper  she  would  send 
the  sheet  to,  gratis;  provided  it  was  ascertained 
they  really  wanted  it  and  were  not  able  to  pay 
for  it. 

Abel  watched  her  with  a  grave  but  slightly 
smiling  aspect.  Finally  he  asked: 

"Can't  you  find  room  for  me  on  that  great 
daily  which  is  to  stand  for  truth,  equality,  non- 
partisanship,  and  is  to  give  monopoly  some  hard 
blows  ?  I  would  like  to  take  a  hand  in  the 
fray." 

"Oh,  yes,  indeed!  Your  name  stands  first 
on  the  list  of  contributors.  I  felt  sure  your 
many  gifts  of  head  and  heart  would  be  placed 
as  freely  as  possible  at  my  disposal.  I  mean  to 
make  the  Saturday  paper  very  ample  and  an 
extra  good  one.  Surely,  you  will  contribute 
to  it  as  often  as  circumstances  permit.  I  am 
counting  on  your  help.  You  are  to  discuss  any 
subject  you  like.  I  want  my  Abelard  for  once 
in  his  life  to  enjoy  the  bracing  air  of  freedom, 
and  to  speak  out  freely  and  fearlessly  the  things 
which  nature  and  nature's  God  reveal  to  him." 


THE    STORM  323 

"What  do  you  propose  to  call  this  ambitious 
venture  of  yours  ?" 

"I  think  of  calling  it  'The  New  Times." 

"Why  not  call  it  'The  Commonwealth'? 
Bryan  has  named  his  'The  Commoner,'  which 
does  not  mean  half  so  much  ?" 

For  a  moment  Heloise  did  not  reply,  only 
looked  at  Abel  in  a  thoughtful  manner.  He 
waited  patiently  until  she  repeated  quite  slowly: 
'The  —  Common- Wealth.'  I  like  your 
suggestion.  It  is  a  good  one,  when  thoroughly 
grasped.  I  will  ring  for  tea  and  over  the  cups 
we  can  consider  the  merits  and  demerits  of  the 
two  names." 

The  wind  rose  higher  and  the  rain  poured 
pitilessly  down  while  the  lovers  formulated 
plans,  which,  however  well  they  might  work  for 
the  good  of  others,  meant  self-effacement  for 
themselves. 

Abel  for  a  time  sat  silent,  looking  ruminatingly 
into  his  cup.  Truth  to  tell  his  thoughts  were  not 
centered  on  the  public  weal  but  on  how  he  could 
best  introduce  another  plea  for  himself. 

"Heloise,"  he  asked  at  length,  "do  the  ele- 
ments affect  you  ?" 

"Always;  I  am  a  human  barometer  and  feel 
weather  changes  long  before  they  appear." 

"Does  a  night  like  this  make  you  selfishly 
glad  you  are  under  cover  ?" 

"Abel,  it  is  hardly  fair  to  press  home  like  that. 


324  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

Dearest,  I  often  hug  my  own  comforts,  even  to 
forgetfulness  of  unfortunates  who  may  be  with- 
out cover." 

"To-night  then  seems  a  fitting  time  for  me  to 
ask  you  to  withdraw  from  the  people,  the  world, 
for  a  space,  and  concentrate  upon  yourself  and 
me.  Darling,  does  not  the  friendlessness  outside 
make  you  yearn  for  a  corner  somewhere  in  God's 
wide  universe  sacred  to  you  and  me  alone?" 

A  shiver  passed  visibly  over  her  frame  and 
she  involuntarily  put  her  hands  over  her  face  as 
she  murmured,  "Abel,  do  not  tempt  me  from 
my  duty  as  I  see  it!" 

"Duty  be  d !"  suddenly  burst  passionately 

from  his  lips. 

Her  hands  dropped  and  she  sat  upright  star- 
ing at  him  with  dilating  pupils. 

"Abel  Allen,  late  minister  of  the  Gospel!" 
she  ejaculated. 

"I  repeat  it!  I  mean  it!  Duty  as  commonly 
taught  and  commonly  practised  is  a  fraud  and  a 
failure.  Look  about  you  and  see  how  it  works 
among  individuals  and  families  —  one  person 
more  sensitively  organized  than  the  others  com- 
mitting a  slow  but  sure  suicide  in  order  that  life 
may  be  made  easier  for  those  who  never  even 
see  what  the  slave  to  duty  is  doing!  How  many 
fine  natures  are  stunted,  how  many  careers 
spoiled,  through  the  twiddling  cares  which  the 
strong  and  generous  permit  the  weak  and  selfish 


THE    STORM  325 

to  lay  upon  them.  Heloise,  my  love,  my  daily 
routine  as  a  minister  of  the  Gospel  has  brought 
all  phases  of  this  sort  of  thing  under  my  notice. 
I  have  seen  enacted  many  times  over  the  par- 
able of  the  goose  that  lays  the  golden  egg. 
The  same  holds  true  through  the  whole  gamut 
of  life,  whether  public  or  private.  Why,  com- 
mon, canny  selfishness  is  notoriously  prone  to 
look  upon  the  one  who  ministers  to  its  wants  as 
lacking  in  common  sense.  It  laughs  in  its 
shabby  sleeve,  even  while  asking  for  more!" 

"My  dear  Abel,  what  a  drenching  wet  blan- 
ket you  throw  over  my  enthusiasm  this  stormy 
night.  What  would  become  of  the  helpless 
ones  if  your  doctrine  prevailed  ?" 

"It  would  be  likely  to  hasten  a  survival  of 
the  fittest  that  would  be  fatal  to  your  proteges, 
the  helpless,"  he  replied.  "But  it  might  also 
enable  the  fittest  to  take  a  hand  at  making  the 

O 

most  of  themselves  —  and  after  all  is  said,  it  is 
through  making  the  most  of  himself  that  man 
is  lifted  higher  in  the  scale  of  being,  and  through 
him  posterity  and  the  race!" 

"A  cruel  doctrine,  the  more  cruel  for  the 
truth  it  contains!"  she  said  impetuously. 

"Then,  despite  your  repudiation  of  it,  you 
still  believe  in  vicarious  atonement  ? " 

"7  do  not!"  with  emphasis. 

"My  darling,  be  consistent.  Why  draw  the 
line  at  the  popular  belief  in  the  sacrificial  death 


326  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

of  Christ  as  a  redemptive  power  sufficient 
to  lift  man  higher  up  as  a  human  being,  and 
then  go  spend  yourself  in  atonement  —  another 
sacrifice  to  the  Moloch  of  ignorance  and 
feebleness." 

"Abel,  this  is  dreadful!  Would  you  have 
me  live  for  myself  alone  ?" 

"God  forbid!  I  would  only  save  you  from 
crucifying  yourself  as  an  individual  for  the  sake 
of  countless  people  whom  you  never  knew, 
never  can  know.  We  love  each  other,  how  can 
our  coming  together  in  the  fulfilment  of  that 
love  take  away  from  others  ?  How  can  our 
self-denial  advance  them  one  iota  ?" 

She  sprang  to  her  feet  and  began  pacing  the 
floor.  Abel  rose  also  and  stood  with  one  hand 
resting  on  the  table  between  them. 

"O,  Abelard,  Abelard,  I  have  named  you 
aright,"  she  cried.  "I  see  in  you  to-night  the 
Abelard  of  old  who  tempted  to  her  undoing  the 
Heloise  who  loved  him  too  well ! " 

The  blood  rushed  to  Abel's  face,  the  hand  on 
the  table  worked  nervously,  while  he  looked 
unflinchingly  into  her  face. 

"Doubtless  that  Heloise  suffered  —  they 
both  suffered.  But  I'll  swear  that  their  released 
spirits  have  exulted  through  the  centuries  in  the 
human  sympathy  they  have  evoked.  How 
much  better  the  rapture,  the  agony,  the  perse- 
cution, and  the  deathless  halo  than  the  sterile 


THE    STORM  327 

death-in-life,  and  the  passing  out  unnoticed  and 
unsung  that  is  the  common  lot!" 

"Abel,  you  wring  my  heart,  my  soul!" 

"Forgive  me,  love,  I  sought  to  reach  your 
reason." 

"  If  I  gave  up  now  the  principles  I  have  cher- 
ished, that  have  been  beckoning  me  onward, 
I  must  despise  myself  for  evermore,"  she  mur- 
mured. 

He  went  over,  took  her  hand  and  pressed  it 
to  his  lips.  She  rested  her  disengaged  hand  on 
his  s^  julder;  in  another  moment  her  head  rested 
there  too. 

They  stood  thus,  his  arms  fondly  encircling 
her,  for  how  long  neither  knew.  They  were 
aroused  to  the  outer  world  by  a  knock  at  the 
door.  It  was  followed  by  the  entrance  of  Nettie. 

"The  cab  you  ordered,  sir,  is  at  the  door,  but 
the  mistress  begs  you  will  stay  here  for  the  night; 
the  weather  is  so  bad!" 

"Yes  —  yes,  that  is  —  pray  say  to  your  mis- 
tress —  thank  her  for  me,  and  tell  her  I  won't 
mind  the  weather.  The  distance  is  not  far,  and 
I  shall  soon  be  under  cover." 

He  wrung  Heloise's  hand.  "Shall  I  see  you 
again  to-morrow  ?" 

"To-morrow  —  yes  —  to-morrow,"  she  an- 
swered vaguely,  like  one  awakening  from  a 
dream. 


CHAPTER  XXIV 
THE  LAST  STRUGGLE 


"THE  trumpet  of  the  down-trodden  has  sounded. 
.  .  .  Upheaval  is  in  the  wind.  There  are  mutterings 
and  stirrings  —  a  low  roar  of  mighty  forces,  resistless, 
pushing  for  light."  —  Mrs.  Van  Rensselaer  Cruger. 

"THOUGH  you  assume  the  face  of  a  saint,  a  hero, 
the  eye  of  the  passing  child  will  not  greet  you  with  the 
same  smile  if  there  lurk  within  you  an  evil  thought, 
an  injustice,  or  a  brother's  tears.  It  is  thoroughly 
borne  home  to  you  that  if  there  be  evil  in  your  heart, 
your  mere  presence  will  proclaim  it  to-day  a  hundred 
times  more  clearly  than  would  have  been  the  case  two  or 
three  centuries  ago.  It  is  felt  on  all  sides  that  the 
conditions  of  the  work-a-day  world  are  changing. 
Let  us  wait  in  silence  —  perhaps  ere  long  we  shall  be 
conscious  of  the  murmur  of  the  gods."  —  Maurice 
Maeterlinck. 

"  I  COULD  not  love  thee,  dear,  so  much 
Loved  I  not  Honor  more." 

"I  ASK  of  Life,  'What  art  thou  ?'  —  as  erstwhile  — 
But  since  Love  holds  my  hand  I  seem  to  know." 


XXIV 


The  Last  Struggle 

* 

ABEL  drove  through  the  storm  that  night 
with  heart  aflame  and  hopes  aglow.  He 
felt  sure  he  had  conquered.  Heloise  had  been 
strangely  shaken;  strangely  moved  from  her 
moorings.  Never  before  had  she  leaned  against 
his  heart  and  in  action,  at  least,  confessed  her- 
self the  loving,  heart-hungry  woman. 

However,  their  next  meeting  threw  a  damper 
over  his  hopes,  for  he  found  his  Heloise  again 
mistress  of  herself.  . 

He  held  out  his  arms  to  greet  her  on  the  terms 
of  their  last  parting. 

"Dear  love/'  she  said,  withdrawing  from  his 
reach,  "I  misled  you  last  night.  I  am  sorry; 
what  more  can  I  say  ?  Our  speedy  marriage, 
Abel,  in  the  sight  of  men  is  a  dream,  a  chimera. 
It  must  remain  an  impossibility  until  the  times 
are  ripe." 

"Heloise,  you  are  cruel,  cruel  beyond  my 
imagining!"  The  words  were  forced  from  him 
like  a  cry. 

"Not  so,  love!  You  don't  know  how  I  have 
had  to  steel  myself  to  be  firm.  But  listen  to  me! 
Before  living  for  love,  I  have  work  to  do.  So 


332  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

have  you.  You  must  fill  out  your  term  in 
Europe.  You  must  formulate  your  life  work. 
Vitalize  the  vision  that  has  come  to  you!  Make 
it  a  reality!  Project  it  upon  the  consciousness 
of  men  and  women!" 

"  I  cannot  do  that  as  well  without  you  as  with 
you,  Heloise.  I  shall  be  too  lonely  to  work 
without  you,  my  cheerful  love.  It  is  my  nature 
to  be  melancholy,  to  brood,  to  despair.  I  need 
you,  Heloise!  I  must  have  you!  Man  was  not 
made  to  be  alone." 

Without  warning  Abelard  threw  his  arms 
around  Heloise  and  pressed  her  close  to  his 
breast.  He  kissed  her  forehead,  her  cheeks, 
and  then  placed  a  burning  kiss  on  her  lips. 
Then  he  laid  his  head  on  her  shoulder  and  wept. 
Heloise's  heart  turned  traitor  as  usual.  It 
cried,  "Yield!  yield!  He  needs  your  care,  yourv 
sympathy,  your  affection.  He  may  die  abroad 
and  you  will  have  killed  him.  Then  what  work 
can  you  achieve  with  a  heart  torn  with  anguish, 
a  mind  paralyzed  with  remorse  ?" 

But  stanch  reason  came  again  to  the  rescue, 
and  gave  her  strength.  She  said  tenderly, 
"Abelard,  dearest,  God  enabled  the  other  Abel- 
ard and  Heloise  to  part  and  do  their  work  after 
blind  passion  had  succeeded  in  carrying  them 
much  farther  from  their  convictions  that  it  has 
thus  far  been  able  to  carry  us.  In  the  minds 
and  hearts  of  Christendom  they  are  eternally 


THE    LAST    STRUGGLE  333 

one.  Even  their  cast-off  bodies  lie  in  the  same 
tomb.  We  too  can  be  true  and  deserve  the 
same  sort  of  recognition  —  should  we  meet  no 
more  in  the  flesh.  Meanwhile,  I  must  set  in 
motion  my  work  here.  Who  knows,  but  that 
sooner  than  now  appears  possible  conditions 
may  advance  even  to  the  point  of  making  our 
marriage  possible  without  my  turning  traitor 
to  my  conviction." 

"  But  if  that  time  does  not  hasten,  if  it  is  still 
delayed?" 

"Then,  Abel,  I  must  strive  to  be  one  of  the 
women  who  loves  justice  more  than  self;  wTho 
can  turn  her  back  on  long-cherished  dreams  of 
husband,  home,  and  children,  and  deny  herself 
the  sweetest  joys,  the  divinest  prerogative  known 
to  woman!" 

In  vain  did  Abel  try  to  weaken  her  resolution. 
In  vain  did  he  even  seek  to  defend  indirectly  the 
orthodoxy  he  had  forsaken,  by  essaying  to 
prove  how  much  better  and  higher  had  stood 
her  sex  under  its  aegis  than  under  that  of  any 
other  system  which  had  preceded  it. 

She  still  insisted  that  anything  like  harmonious 
development  could  never  become  a  permanent 
inheritance  of  the  race  so  long  as  religion  and 
the  state  continue  to  play  their  old  role  of  plac- 
ing woman  beneath  man,  and  then  calling  the 
ceremony  that  does  this  a  sacrament,  as  does  the 
mother  church  of  Christendom! 


334  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

"Abel,"  she  continued,  "I  saw  a  sight  once  in 
a  Roman  Catholic  church  (which  church,  by 
the  way,  holds  much  in  its  views  and  policies 
that  is  better  for  humanity  than  Protestant 
orthodoxy),  a  sight  that  remains  branded  on  my 
memory.  I  saw  a  poor  woman,  who  bore  in. her 
countenance  every  mark  of  toil  and  hard  treat- 
ment, rise  from  her  seat  in  the  church,  go  for- 
ward to  the  altar,  and  with  a  lighted  candle  in 
her  hand,  kneel  there  humbly  with  bowed  head, 
while  the  priest  pronounced  words  over  her. 

"  Marveling  much,  I  waited  until  coming  out, 
and  then  asked  an  intelligent-looking  woman 
what  it  meant. 

"Oh,  she  is  being  "churched,"'  was  the 
answer. 

"Churched,  what  does  that  mean  ?'  I  asked. 

"Why,'  she  said,  lowering  her  voice  and 
drooping  her  eyelids,  'every  woman  is  expected 
to  do  that  within  a  certain  time  after  giving 
birth  to  a  child.  It  is  to  cleanse  her  from  origi- 
nal sin,  you  know,  the  sin  we  all  bring  into  the 
world  with  us  since  the  Fall  of  Man.' 

"And  the  woman's  husband?'  I  queried, 
'why  is  not  he  there  too  ?' 

"Why   is   not   he  there   too?     Why,   men 
never  do  that!'  she  answered,  looking  into  my 
face  with  astonishment,  'They  aren't  in  for  it  — 
it's  Eve's  doings.' 

"Abel,  that  picture  makes  my  blood  boil  even 


THE    LAST   STRUGGLE  335 

now.  The  natural  suffering  of  that  poor  woman, 
the  extra  care  laid  upon  her,  all  that  was  not 
enough  without  degradation  in  the  name  of 
religion. 

"Such  are  the  things  that  I  could  not  only 
never  accept  in  my  own  person,  but  never  for- 
give seeing  done  to  others.  The  church  has 
always  belittled  woman;  it  has  often  denounced 
and  persecuted  her.  Yet  she  has  invariably 
played  the  part  of  Christ  towards  it.  When  it 
smote  her  on  one  cheek,  she  has  turned  the  other; 
when  it  has  taken  away  her  coat  she  has  of  her 
own  free  will  given  her  cloak  also.  Even  when 
the  master  passion  of  life  has  forced  her  at  times 
to  disobey  its  'Thou  shalt  not,'  she  has  in  most 
cases,  like  the  Heloise  of  old,  quickly  submitted 
herself  to  its  mandates;  even  though  obedience 
meant  lifelong  crucifixion  to  her  affections." 

"My  love,"  returned  Abel,  "the  world  is 
slowly  but  surely  outgrowing  the  theologians. 
The  religions  of  the  past  are  one  and  all  soaked 
with  the  blood  of  human  beings  —  not  to  speaJc 
of  the  oceans  of  blood  which  our  up-climbing 
animal  brotherhood  has  been  forced  to  shed  on 
their  altars." 

"Aye,  a  new  religion  must  we  have!  One 
based  on  knowledge,  not  ignorance  —  on  truth, 
not  fiction  —  on  love,  not  fear!"  ended  Heloise. 

Though  Heloise  with  steadfast  mind  adhered 


336  ABELARD    AND    HELOISE 

to  that  which  to  a  loving  woman  is  a  life  of  mar- 
tyrdom, her  heart  often  played  traitor  to  her 
head,  during  those  last  hours  when  she  looked 
into  the  beloved  face  and  asked  herself,  "What 
if  it  should  be  for  the  last  time  ?" 

As  they  stood  together  at  the  railway  station, 
and  watched  the  ominous  signs  that  heralded 
the  starting  of  the  train  that  was  to  bear  him 
away,  her  face  became  pallid,  her  breathing 
labored,  and  only  a  supreme  effort  of  the  will 
enabled  her  to  retain  her  presence  of  mind  and 
remain  mistress  of  her  treacherous  heart. 

Abel  noticed  her  bloodless  face  and  inwardly 
prayed  that  she  might  yield. 

With  glowing  eyes  and  tense  breath  he  im- 
plored : 

"Heloise!  Your  heart  is  pleading  for  me.  Listen 
to  its  prayers!  It  is  your  truest  counsellor." 

She  had  barely  strength  enough  to  slowly 
shake  her  head  and  reply,  "No,  no,  Abelard 
beloved.  It  is  only  proving  itself  the  undis- 
ciplined heart  of  a  woman  who  has  long  ac- 
cepted a  servile  lot.  I  shall  teach  it  to  behave 
better  in  future." 

Then  the  color  rushed  back  to  her  cheek,  a 
dauntless  look  came  into  her  misty  eyes,  and  her 
breathing  became  tranquil. 

Abel  saw  that  the  moment  of  weakness  — 
perhaps  yielding  —  was  past.     He  finally  real- 
ized that  he  must  depart  alone.     He  had  hoped 


THE    LAST   STRUGGLE  337 

against  hope  until  the  last.  With  this  certainty 
a  wave  of  blackest  despair  engulfed  his  soul. 

"Heloise,"  he  cried,  "why  are  we  suffering 
in  this  way,  when  we  could  be  so  happy  to- 
gether! Come,  be  mine,  love!  Be  mine!  How 
do  we  know  there  is  a  future,  a  God  ? " 

He  had  put  his  arm  around  her,  as  if  to  hold 
her  to  him  forever,  quite  oblivious  of  the  fact  that 
many  people  were  about. 

Again  her  cheek  paled  but  she  answered 
firmly,  "  Dear  Abelard,  let  us  love  our  neighbor 
as  ourself,  and  we  shall  rest  secure  in  the  knowl- 
edge and  love  of  God.  I  shall  pray  unceas- 
ingly that  God  will  bless  and  give  you  strength, 
and  reveal  Himself  to  you  abundantly." 

Abel  could  not  speak.  Indeed,  through  his 
tear-blurred  eyes  he  could  see  her  but  dimly. 
Nevertheless,  the  next  moment  was  the  sweetest 
of  his  life;  for,  as  the  whistle  sounded,  Heloise 
clasped  him  tightly  to  her  heart  and  gave  him  a 
long,  tender  kiss  —  a  kiss  he  should  always  feel 
as  long  as  he  lived! 

"  Darling,"  she  whispered,  "  keep  a  stout  heart 
while  working  out  your  new  destiny,  and  never 
for  one  moment  despair  of  the  fulfilment  of  our 
love." 


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